Girlfriend with Testing Device Ch. 09

Author's Note: Sorry for the long delay! Life was kicking my ass. Let's get back into it shall we?

Warning: this chapter is rated a lusty, boobier-than-normal R and includes boobs, tits, melons, pancakes, betrayal, romantic changeroom sex, boob swaps, oblivious friends, oblivious boyfriends, slutty drinks, strippers, girls with dicks, girls without dicks, girls sitting on their dicks, funny backstory moments, flirtatious male waitresses, reality blindness, delicious wings, slow service, a happy parade of dongs, ripped clothes, confessions of love, big mistakes, wet t-shirts, body dysphoria, and two lovers who don't realize just how close they've come to oblivion.

Girlfriend with Testing Device

- A Smutty Fanfiction, of Sorts -

= Part 9-- Breast Friends Forever! =

By Razmagurk

Ellen was talking, but I don't think Elizabeth was paying any attention. She just couldn't seem to look away from her best friend's naked tits.

I couldn't blame her, they were pretty magnificent. I mean, sure, they were huge, and that was nice, but It wasn't just the size, it was the shape, the bounce, the way they hung off her... a number of variables that all just came together to create something that was still somehow more than the sum of its parts.

And, oh god, don't even get me started on her nipples.

So yeah, long story short, Ellen was talking, but neither of us were really paying any attention. We were both way too busy staring at her naked tits. I'm glad she had decided to wear them bare today. As a fashion choice, it was a little conservative, sure, but she was trying to walk the line between trying to dress a little more feminine and it being so obviously feminine that people gave her weird looks and it was a nice compromise.

Eventually, Ellen stopped talking. There was a pause as she looked at Elizabeth expectantly.

"Wait, sorry..." Elizabeth raised her head, but her eyes lingered. "What?"

Ellen gave an exaggerated sigh, sending her bare breasts swaying. "I said," she said, "that if you have a particular pair of boobs in mind, we should see if we can corner them somewhere so that we can explain everything to them."

"You know what?" said Elizabeth, smiling wryly and giving a bit of a laugh. "Somehow I don't think that's going to be as tricky of a proposition as you think."

"Oh?" she raised one of her lovingly arched eyebrows. "Why's that?"

"Well, um, you know..." Elizabeth scratched an ear awkwardly. From the look on her face, however, it was clear that Ellen did not in fact know, so Elizabeth continued. "It's always been kind of hard to admit it, but I mean, we grew up together, so you must at least suspect it, deep down, right?"

"Suspect what?" Ellen furrowed her brow in concern, wary she was walking into some sort of trap.

"The boobs I've always most admired, Elles..." Elizabeth took a deep breath. "Are yours."

"Mine!?" Ellen laughed sharply, looking down derisively at her double black diamonds.

"Yes, Elles, yours!" Elizabeth sighed. "Ellen I've always been jealous of your boobs! Ever since that one summer at all-girls camp when everyone was giving you all the attention while I got none. I mean, look at them!" she stuck out her hands and groped the air in front of Ellen's heaving melons. "They're just so... sexy." She swallowed hard. "I mean, I know that guys never found you all that attractive, but that's their loss, hun. There's not a girl alive who wouldn't kill to get her hands on those puppies. "

"Elizabeth!" Ellen crossed her hands over her chest in an effort to show some modestly, but that really just caused her cleavage to spill out over her arms.

"Point of order." I chimed in. "I'm a guy and I think she's amazing."

Elizabeth rolled her eyes "Guys in general, I mean. Look, this also solves the issue of finding some third party to get boobs from doesn't it? It's not like we have to explain all this to you, right?"

"I... yeah... I suppose." Ellen was pensive, nervous. "Still though..." I could see her mind turning.

She wasn't seriously considering the offer, was she? I tried picturing her with smaller boobs, no, with Elizabeth's completely flat chest. It was... actually kind of fine? It didn't bother me as much as I was expecting. I mean, my pussy was a little disappointed, sure, but it hardly gets a vote. It would be pretty awkward seeing those intimately familiar orbs end up on Elizabeth, but it's not like I was dating Ellen for her looks. She would still be my baby. Besides, what she decided to do with her body was her choice at the end of the day and I'd support her decision no matter what.

Ellen cupped her chest contemplatively. "I mean, I get that these things aren't even mine, I've only had them a couple of days now, but, well... I don't want to give these up." She blushed. "I really like these boobs."

"So do I!" laughed Elizabeth.

"Well what am I supposed to do? If I give them to you then I'm going to be the one with... I mean, no offense or anything, but I'd be the one with small boobs. Not that there's anything wrong with that."

"Oh, no, Elles, no offense taken, I get it. Completely. Don't even try to front. It sucks." Elizabeth shrugged "I guess you'd have to find a new pair?"

"Honestly, Elizabeth," Ellen looked down at the device, then over at the stage. "I had kind of just assumed you'd want to snatch a pair from one of the strippers."

Elizabeth followed Ellen's gaze. Sure enough there was a lot of boob on display. "Uhg, It's tempting, Elles, it really is." She bit her lip as she glanced back at forth between the girl on stage and Ellen's enormous rack. "How about this? How about we both keep an eye out on the girls as they come out. If either of us sees a pair we like, we can sample them for a bit to see how they feel. Maybe we find a pair I like and I take those, or maybe we find a pair you like and I take yours. Its win-win."

"That does makes sense, I guess." Ellen nodded reluctantly. "It doesn't really solve the issue though... one of us is still going to have to talk a girl into giving up her boobs."

"Wait, hold on," I laughed, "you want to sample their boobs?"

"Of course." Elizabeth smiled. "You wouldn't buy shoes without trying them on, would you?"

"Oh my god, no way. Trying it on is half the fun!" Great. Now that I was thinking about it in terms of shopping I couldn't help but grin like an idiot. Obviously you'd want to try everything on first... and you could probably spend all day just mixing and matching, and, damned if it didn't actually start to sound like a lot of fun now. I was kind of jealous.

In the back of my mind I couldn't help but imagine a whole mall of people shopping for body parts, bartering away traits and features and hunting for a good deal. Okay, it was a little creepy, granted, but wasn't that where all this was headed? Wasn't that the logical conclusion of the existence of something like the device?

"And I mean," Elizabeth continued, "this is a much bigger commitment than a pair of shoes. And it's not like anyone will notice, right?"

"I suppose." Ellen was still half lost in thought. "No sense in committing to something you're not going to be happy with. It took me, like, an hour of swapping before I was happy with the way I look."

"Wait," I shot a worried look in Ellen's direction. "An hour? Really?" I hadn't realized she had been so unhappy with her appearance. I knew she didn't like a few things here and there, and that she had a general lack of self confidence about that sort of thing, but I didn't realize it was that extreme.

"Well, maybe not actual hours." Her breasts swayed as she shook her head. "But it took me more than a few tries, that's for sure."

"Still..." I frowned.

"Oh please." She waved her hand dismissively as she raised an eyebrow in the direction of my chest. "It took less time then it took you to decide on that top."

I looked down at my skimpy little top and laughed. "True." She had me dead to rights. I'd spent forever trying to decide on what to wear this morning, hadn't I? In my defense though, everything I had tried on had ended up either torn off of me or discarded on the floor, a casualty of our incessant lust. Seeing that she, too, was staring at my cleavage, I arced my shoulders back and thrust out my tits as I sensuously ran a hand along my cleavage. "But aren't you glad I wore it?"

I could feel my skin heating up. All this talk about boobs was really starting to get my blood pumping and thinking back to how well an thoroughly we had explored our passions this morning was certainly not helping. With a practiced sultriness, I brushed a lock of my hair back behind my ears. From the looks of Ellen's tightening jeans, I could tell I wasn't the only one getting all worked up. I licked my lips.

"Oh, you have no idea." she said. Her breath was heavy. I could feel her gaze roaming across my body as she leaned in towards me. I could only imagine the things she'd do to me if we were alone right then.

"Wait, hold up," interrupted Elizabeth, experimentally jabbing a finger into Ellen's bare shoulder. "It took you that long to decide? What exactly did you swap about yourself, girl?"

Ellen just blinked for a moment as her brain abruptly shifted gears.

"Oh, geez," she said, blushing. "It's kind of embarrassing."

"Come on, Elles, dish up! Did you used to have some kind of hideous birthmark or something? Ugly scar? Third testicle? Are you secretly like, a 60-year-old dude?"

I tried picturing her as an older dude and shuddered. The other things I was pretty sure I could handle, but I guess I had to draw the line somewhere.

"No, no!" Ellen laughed "it's nothing like that! I wasn't hideous or anything, geeze. I just, um, I made a lot of little changes. Like, my nose, and my hair, and my lips, my facial structure, skin, hips, legs, feet, butt... Just... a lot of little bits from a lot of different people."

I frowned, but Elizabeth spoke before I could. "Oh wow" she said, "I'm surprised there's any of you left! You really went whole hog, huh?"

"M-maybe?" she glanced in my direction. "Looking back I admit it may have been excessive, but like I said, I was drunk."

"So, wait..." said Elizabeth, slowly. "Do I get to do that?"

"What?"

"I want to go whole hog too! I mean, look at me," she gestured downwards at her body, "and then look at them." she gestured towards the stage. They must have been between acts because there wasn't anyone there at the moment, but her point got across nonetheless. "It's like we're in a whole other world, them and I, but with that thing I could be like, the sexiest girl in the club! I could have guys drooling over me left and right."

"Elizabeth," I chided, "you don't need some magical device to make you beautiful. You're plenty beautiful just the way you are. Besides," I smiled jovially, "the sexiest girl in the club is obviously Ellen."

"Aw," Ellen laughed, "Thank you baby."

"Thanks, Evan." Elizabeth gave me a sad little smile. "That actually means a lot to me. But try telling that to my asshole boss, or my asshole exes, or like, any of the asshole men who would rather go home with all the other random hoes before they'll go home with me. No, I'll be beautiful once I have great big tits that I can wave in everyone's stupid vain petty asshole faces." She slapped her hand on the table in frustration. "And if I happen to get me some great big dick sucking lips and a nose job and some nice long blonde hair along the way, then hey, I'm not complaining."

Elizabeth took a deep breath to calm herself down. Obviously self-conscious about it, she ran her hand through her unkempt mess of short brown hair. I frowned. Sure, Elizabeth was lacking when it came to curves, but she had a great face. It was a very natural looking kind of beauty that she did great things to enhance cosmetics-wise. Bigger lips and a different nose would completely spoil the whole look. But then, from what Ellen had always told me, Elizabeth had always cared more about getting guys to sleep with her than about actually looking nice.

"Wait, hold on" said Elizabeth, turning back to Ellen. "How'd you get so many people willing to trade all their good features away? What were you offering them?"

"I um." Ellen blushed as she failed to meet Elizabeth's gaze. "I didn't?"

"Double standard!" Elizabeth gasped and pointed her finger. "J'accuse!"

"It's not like that!" Ellen cried "I was uncharacteristically drunk! And I had just gotten the device and, and, I didn't know what I was doing! I didn't even realize it was real. It felt like I was in some kind of weird video game or something building a character. A sexy, perfect character." She sighed. "Except the next thing I know I've swapped all the cheerleaders and football players around and I'm losing track of who has my eyebrows and everything's just so hot and I'm not thinking too clearly and and..." she took a moment to steady herself. "It was a great big mess, okay?"

I squeezed her hand.

"Aw, Elles." Elizabeth took her other hand. "That completely sucks that you had a bad experience with it, but you can't let that get you down. I mean, hey, at least you got a great body out of it, right?"

"I'm just glad Evan arrived when he did." Ellen smiled. "Thanks to him the night ended on a positive note."

"Aww, I'm glad I could be there for you." I leaned over and gave her a kiss. "I love you, baby."

"I love you too," she said, returning the kiss tenderly before leaning in to give me one with a bit more gusto. Soon what had started as a tender moment of shared vulnerability devolved into a parade of carnal desires. I let out a soft moan. Like the rock hard dick currently struggling against her skinny jeans, Ellen's passion was only just barely being contained.

Elizabeth was rolling her eyes of course, but neither of us noticed.

For a moment I thought I felt the soft Zzzzttttt of the device echoing in the back of my brain, but the sound was drowned out by my more pressing need to get as much of Ellen's sweet wonderful tongue in my mouth as possible.

A quiet "oh my god" broke Ellen and I apart. We grinned sheepishly as we separated. Elizabeth had the device in her hands and was toying idly with the knobs, but her focus was clearly down beyond the device.

Elizabeth was staring slack-jawed at the boobs jutting out of her chest. It was like she'd never seen them before. They jiggled as they strained and squished against the boundaries of her way-too-tight shirt. That poor top was clearly being pushed past its limits. What fabric wasn't bulging was instead hanging down off of her breast like a waterfall, completely failing to hide her midriff. The expression on her face was one of complete disbelief.

She glanced over at Ellen's delicate and petite chest and practically did a double take. Ellen's small perky nipples, so prominently displayed on her small and elegant boobs, were hard with desire as they strained hotly against the club's cool air. Her breathing was still quick with desire from our little makeout session, and while she lacked the bosom to really heave, it was still more than enough to make her little mounds wobble slightly with each heavy breath.

Elizabeth looked back down at her boobs as a slow grin broke across her face.

I raised an eyebrow suspiciously. Wait, did she just swap something? But before I could think too much of it, my brain was completely hijacked by the mouth-watering scent of fried food and sugary sauces. I didn't know what exactly it was, but the way it tugged at my brain reminded me of just how incredibly hungry I was feeling.

"Sorry for the wait!" bellowed a flowery alto from somewhere behind me. "Our dear bartender has suffered a bit of a wardrobe malfunction and she had to go change shirts. And, uh, well, we're a bit short staffed in the back on account of Stacie taking the day off. Something about none of her good shoes fitting? You know how those cheer girls can be, right Liz?"

I turned to look at our waitress. His huge muscular form and bouncing tits unmistakable as he eclipsed my view of the stage. In each hand he had a tray piled high with drinks and food.

"Huh?" Elizabeth glanced up from her breasts and stared directly into the breasts of our waitress, then she gave a huge grin and laughed. "Oh, right." Was that a tear in her eye? I didn't realize it was that funny.

I glanced over at the woman behind the bar. I guess the uniform she had been wearing before just hadn't quite been up to the task of hiding her boyish chest. The shirt she had now was a kind of simple white thing with the club's logo on it. It looked like something the bar probably broke out for wet t-shirt contests or as giveaways. Seemed like a good thing to have a few extra of lying around. It wouldn't surprise me if a place like this occasionally needed to clothe some very drunk and naked patrons.

"Here you go, Liz. Wings, three specials, three beers, and a threesome of slutty drinks."

The food was quintessential pub food. It was rich, golden and fried through and through. Again, not normally my cup of tea, but I was practically drooling at the smell. The special, as it turns out, was a set of little sausage thingies wrapped in a kind of deep-fried croissant batter that had been folded up to look like a dress. They weren't quite corndogs but they were served with some kind of creamy white sauce and they smelled heavenly.

"Orgy.' Elizabeth corrected. "The group noun for it is an orgy."

'Honey," Mike countered, "It'll be an orgy when they can schedule a fourth, until then it's a threesome."

"Well then what do you call it when there's just two?"

He laughed. "A good start!"

Now, I don't normally spend a lot of time in bars or clubs or whatever, so I'm not exactly an expert on the subject, but the drinks in question were a trio of those old-fashioned whiskey glasses, each filled with an opalescent liquid that had a milky white suspension floating like a cloud in the center.

Mine had a cherry skewered in it.

"Sorry, this may sound like a dumb question," I batted my eyes up at the handsome Asian features of our waitress. "but what exactly makes these drinks slutty again?"

"You'll find out real soon." He gave me a coy little wink, then laughed. "Oh, and hey, sorry for bumping into you earlier." He put his hand on my shoulder and bent down, his bare breasts bouncing as they hung boldly out of the huge tear in his shirt. "I didn't really get the chance to apologize. I shouldn't have been out in the foyer anyway. Its bad luck if any of us get seen before the patrons get approved by Kim."

I looked over at the small black girl standing guard near the club's entrance. She had her hands folded securely over her manly chest in a gesture that indicated she wasn't about to take shit from anyone. On most people it would be an intimidating stance, but between her diminutive height and the way her little toga-themed uniform seemed designed to show off her ample behind and her loose chest, it looked more sassy than scary.

"No, no," I smiled apologetically, "It was my fault. I was completely distracted."

"Still. I should have said something then. Plus," a bounce on his heel sent his mellons wobbling, "you're Liz's friend, and that makes you our special guest." He gave me a flirtatious smile and put his hand on my shoulder. "I didn't know she had invited such handsome friends."

"Oh um." I smiled back politely. "Thank you." I twisted my body a little to give him a better look down my top, but to my surprise he continued to look me in the eyes instead. I blushed a little, I was used to getting attention from boys, but it was rare that they were ever really interested in me for anything but my body.