Grandpa’s Nude Day: Past & Present

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“Why not? Don’t you want to? You’re not a queer are you?”

Sweet Jesus!

“Don’t look at me like that. You never know these days.” Who didn’t know I can remember thinking to myself. I can honestly say that at eighteen, and living when and where I did, I’d never had the thought that someone I knew was queer. I’m pretty sure I didn’t even know exactly what queer meant. Or what it entailed.

And so our sibling conversation turned to sex. And my sister, sensing my innocence, was quite prepared to shock her younger brother. Before that night I’d never really discussed sex with a girl. Not frankly anyway. Oh I’d attempted in a fumbling way to fight through my girlfriend’s ready defences, but actually discuss the act itself with a girl. Unh uh!

It was a pretty one sided conversation. I let Susie talk, afraid if I interrupted her that she might stop talking. She told me about her boyfriends, a string of boyfriends really.

When I finally trouped off to bed an hour later, half way drunk, my head was spinning. Spinning more from the stories my sister had regaled me with more than due to the drink.

Still Dreaming: June 12th 1968, Philips Creek, N.Y.

“Do you know what day it is?” It was one in the afternoon. We were sitting side by side on the end of the dock. I had a hangover from the night before that the coffee Susie had delivered to my bedroom an hour earlier hadn’t helped.

“Saturday?” I asked groggily.

“Not what day of the week you idiot,” she chastised. I was in a pair of old, paint splattered cut off jeans and Susie was in a bathing suit. A two piece bathing suit. Although it might not be considered that risqué today in 2010, for that time and place it was special. And even hung over, and even though she was my sister, my eyes kept slipping to the tops of my sisters breasts.

“So what day is it anyway?” I finally asked.

“Stop looking at my breasts perv,” she ordered as I reddened.

“I’m not...” I mumbled. Of course I had been.

“They’re just breasts, you must have seen some before,” she said as adjusted her top, an adjustment that seemed to allow even more rounded flesh to escape from the skimpy top. I blushed! But my eyes didn’t move from where they were riveted.

“I’ll bet you’ve seen little Miss Poplin’s nipples, haven’t you?” she asked as she adjusted the cloth that was covering her left breast. And as she did, for just a nanosecond, I’m pretty sure I saw her nipple. My first real, live nipple!

“Her names Jan,” I said, my eyes now on full alert. My cock was huge. But when Susie adjusted the cloth atop her other breast her fingers blocked my view.

“Well, have you? Have you seen Janie’s nipples?” But before I could deny her accusation I watched as her eyes drifted down my body. Towards my... I jumped up and then quickly dove into the water. If I’d waited a second longer she’d have seen the bulge in my pants.

“Do you smoke?” she asked as she pulled some rolling paper and a plastic bag from her purse. I was standing on the dock, looking down at her, the water dripping off my body. My cock was back under control.

“No, it’s bad for you, your lungs. You should see some of the pictures in my anatomy books,” I said, stunned that one of my sisters would be so stupid. “What kind of cigarette is that anyway?” I asked as I sat down opposite her.

“Grass ... weed,” she said as she set to work rolling a joint. “Marijuana,” she added when she saw I still hadn’t got it.

Of course I eventually tried it. What eighteen year old boy wouldn’t have?

“I was supposed to be in a Nude Day parade today,” I heard sometime later through the confusion the smoke had produced in my brain.

“What?”

“In New York. That’s what today is. World Nude Day. All my pals were going to be in a parade.”

“Naked? In public? In New York City? ” My tone asking ‘what planet are your friends from’.”

“They celebrate it all over the world ... France ... Germany ... Italy ...”

“Bull!” I might have been a rube, a rube who’d just smoked his first joint, but I was pretty sure there was no such thing as World Nude Day.

“But I came up here instead, to see my little baby brother,” Susie said languorously, stretching sinuously as she said it. Or maybe it was just the marijuana that had slowed down her movements for me.

“Hah,” I snorted, or I think I did.

“And guess what? My baby brother, who apparently has never seen a naked woman, is trying to check out his sisters boobs.”

“I’m not,” I say even as my staring eyes belie my words.

“Maybe we should hold our own nude day, the first annual Philips Family Nude Swim,” my sister suggests.

“Yeah right.” Susie’s eyes are glued on mine as she reaches behind her back and releases the clasp holding the bikini top together.

“Somebody might see.” My first live tits! I was going fucking crazy!

“Sure Joey, like we’re only five miles from the closest person,” she scoffs, then stands up and slips her panties down her legs. PUBIC HAIR! But a second later she turned and launched herself through the air and out into the pond.

Seconds later she resurfaces. “So, are you coming in?” I shake my head no, scared and embarrassed even while knowing I want to.

“CHICKEN!” I hear her disdain not once but again and again as it echoes back at me off the surrounding hills.

And then I’m in the water. Naked. Nervous. Excited. Harder than I’ve ever been. My sister’s giggling. I’m not experienced enough to understand that she’s as excited as I am.

I stare at her naked ass when she finally climbs up the ladder at the end of the dock. And then she turns and watches me as I tread water ten feet away. Drops of water are dripping from the hair at the juncture of her legs.

Eventually I mount the courage to climb the ladder. But my cock, which had been tamed by the cool water immediately started to grow as I climbed the steps. It was slapping up against my stomach by the time I’d mounted the last step and reached the dock. Of course I scurried to grab my towel.

“I want to see it,” Susie said as I draped the towel around me. “C’mon over here,” she invited as she tapped a spot opposite her. And I did! I simply let the towel drop and walked over towards her, then sat down with crossed legs and settled myself opposite her. Our knees touched. I was eighteen years old. I’d never seen a naked girl in the flesh before that day. I’d never been that excited. I was high on dope.

“It’s so beautiful.” And her voice didn’t have a hint of teasing in it when she said the words. “Tell me about him.” Susie was staring at my cock.

“Tell you about who? My penis?”

“Yes your penis. I told you all about me last night.”She was probably more zonked out than I was.

“But what do you want to know?” I was at a loss.

“What’s his name?”

“His name?”

“What do you call him?” I’d never called ‘him’ anything.

“All boys have names for their peckers,” she announced to my confusion. They do? “We’ll call him Lord Jim,” she announced. And she’d called him that for the ensuing forty years.

“Lord Jim?”

“Lord Jim is very big you know Joey.” At that moment he was huge.

“How often do you exercise him?” Another question that left me speechless.

“Joey,” she continued when she saw I wasn’t about to give her my masturbation schedule, “all teenage boys masturbate.” I don’t say a word.

“Did you masturbate yesterday, last night?” I nod yes.

“In bed?” Another nod.

“Were you thinking about me, about what we talked about, when you were doing it?”

“It was a wet dream… this morning … it woke me up … I didn’t really do any thinking,” I finally manage to get out.

“Was I in your wet dream?” Of course she had been! I nod.

“So even though you masturbated early this morning ‘Lord Jim’ is excited today?” Lord Fucking Jim seemed to recognise he was being talked about as he bobbed excitedly between us.

“Show me.”

“Show you what?”

“Show me how you do it?” Susie’s eyes are lit up in excitement. Without conscious thought I start to stroke myself. My eyes dart from Susie’s breasts to her patch of pubic hair as my hand moves.

“It’s bigger than John’s,” she says as she watches me. John I knew from the night before was her current boyfriend. “Much bigger.” My hand continues to move.

“I’ve never seen one so big,” she adds as she moves her hands down across her breasts and then down until her fingers meet in her thick bush. She pulls her lips apart.

“Should I put a finger in?” she asks. I nod, then watch as she pushes the middle finger of her left hand into her sex. My hand continues to fly.

“Can I touch ‘Lord Jim’?” she asks as her other hand stretches to grab me.

“Oh fuck! I’m going to cum.” I’m moaning as I watch Susie’s fingers move onto my cock. And then the sperm explodes up the canon my cock has become. Then splatters angrily and wetly between her breasts.

And then a second shot ... and a third ... and a fourth ... and a ...

“Gawd Joe, how often do you masturbate?” my sister finally demands. Her chest and stomach and thighs are covered by my cream.

THE PRESENT Saturday, June 12th 2010 Nude Day

“BASTARD!”

That shout, coming from just outside my bedroom door, woke me the next morning around seven. It woke me from my Nude Day dream. It woke me from the image of my sister Susie, as she sat naked, kneeling opposite me, so close that our knees were touching. It woke me from the image of my eighteen year old cock spurting out its load of cum, of the image of my warm cream splattering against her chest and stomach and thighs. Of the image of Susie sliding a finger across one of her breasts and capturing a thick, hanging thread. It took me from the memory of Susie sliding her cum coated finger between her lips.

“BASTARD!”

The shout came again, clearly from Amanda, and it was followed by a string of expletives that a young woman, even one training to be a doctor, should never have known. Or used. For the next three or four minutes she kept me from falling back asleep by tromping up and down outside my door, all the while muttering just loud enough for me to hear but not discern the words. Finally she rapped insistently on my door.

“Are you awake?” was demanded more than asked.

“How could I not be,” I yelled back as I sat up in bed. The dream hard-on I’d been sporting when her shout had awakened me had disappeared.

“Can I come in?” she asked while opening the door.

“Did you bring me my coffee?”

“Huh!” she muttered, clearly not pleased with the world. Nor had she taken the time to change out of her nightclothes. A thin, spaghetti strapped ‘cami’ in ivory with a white lace trim. And while not décolleté the soft cloth clung to her breasts and only highlighted their size and shape. Her puffy nipples were clearly highlighted. She had matching shorts, perhaps a size too small judging how they clung delightfully to her thighs and bum.

I tore my eyes away as I asked, “Problem?”

“MEN!” she spat out. I immediately decided my best course was just to shut up. I’d learned that much in my sixty years.

“He’s not coming,” Amanda finally allowed.

“Todd?” She nodded. “Todd has a chance to take you to a Nude Day parade and he bailed out?” How dumb is this guy I wondered silently.

“Something supposedly came up.”

It certainly wasn’t his penis I thought as I shook my head. And frankly I was quite pleased with the prospect of more quality time with my pretty granddaughter. “It was probably a bad idea anyway. You of all people, a Philips girl, walking around naked with a bunch of perverts.” Amanda had always hated to be crossed. I knew that last minute changes to her plans never pleased her. Todd would pay for his transgression for a good long time.

“I wanted to go.”

“Huh? You did? Didn’t you say last night that it was his idea. That he had to convince you to go.”

“I thought it was a stupid idea at first,” she admitted as she sat. “But then I thought why not? They’re just nude bodies ... and I am a doctor.” I let her run on for a few minutes, let her give me the long explanation of how she’d finally decided it was a good idea. How she’d actually been getting ‘psyched up’, her words, about the whole idea. Hornyness was probably a better description of the reason she and Todd had decided to go.

“It would have been good for me, help me in my future doctoring,” she said. I wasn’t that convinced by her reasoning but knew better than to opine said thought aloud.

“And I bought the paint, the special body paint stuff,” she complained.

“He’s a real jerk,” I agreed, trying to hide the grin on my lips. “C’mon, come here and your favourite uncle will give you a hug,” I invited. I was sitting up against the headboard and tapped the spot next to me.

“It’s not funny, the paint was very expensive,” she growled, then muttered “MEN” again even as she sat down next to me. I put my arm around her shoulder.

“I could take you,” I offered as she snuggled against me. It was simply said to earn me a few points and wasn’t expected to be taken seriously.

“You will? Really? Oh I love you Uncle Joe,” my granddaughter squealed.

Immediately fearing the worst I tried to backtrack. I had no intention of wandering around Ausable Chasm bare assed. But my words, “I’m sure you wouldn’t want to go with an old--” was interrupted before I could finish.

“Oh gosh, we’ll have to hurry Uncle Joe if we want to get there by noon.” Seconds later she was gone from the room.

A quick shower was followed by a hurried meal (no time for French Toast this morning ‘Uncle Joe’). Then I was invited into my granddaughters bedroom and told it was up to me to paint her. With the special, expensive sky blue paint.

“I want it to look like I’m wearing a bikini,” Amanda instructed. I shake the paint can. “I’ll draw lines first and you can fill in the empty spaces.” A nude coloring book for adults?

But truth be told Amanda certainly had some empty spaces I’d like to fill in. And it wasn’t that onerous a task for a sixty year old man to be in the presence of a beautiful naked young woman. Even if she was in my family tree.

Well in the end I had to draw the lines. They wouldn’t have been straight if she had done them now would they? And how could she have done her back? Her bum. I took my time. And I was continually interrupted in my work by my pretty niece who insisted on inspecting every line I drew on her delectable skin. I gave her boy shorts. High cut boy shorts that would let lots of flesh escape. Except all the flesh had already escaped.

It was twenty minutes later before I shook the paint can again. She gasped when I pressed the nozzle and a stream of sky blue paint shot out.

Eventually she was ready to go. Not a bad mornings work I thought. I had sported a hard-on the whole time I was painting her.

****

“It’s not that serious you know,” she suddenly said. Both lost in our thoughts neither of us had said much during the first twenty miles of the trip.

“What isn’t?”

“Todd and me. It’s just ...”

“Just what?” I asked when she didn’t continue.

“Will you answer a question for me first? Okay?”

My eyes flicked from the road to hers. “Sure.” I had no idea where the conversation was going.

“Do you like sex Uncle Joe?” My eyes, my surprise showing, again jumped over to meet hers. “No, I didn’t mean ...” I watched silently as she struggled for her next words.

“When you were young I mean. In medical school.”

“Yes,” I finally answered after many seconds of silence, “I think that when your pooooor oooold Uncle Joe was young,” and I drew out and emphasised the words poor and old. “I think I could be fairly described as a man who enjoyed sex.”

“I didn’t mean you’re thaaaaat old,” she answered back with a giggle, the lightness of my response obviously having relaxed her. “Especially now since Grandma has equipped you with the latest in pharmaceutical aids...”

“Ha, ha. If I wasn’t driving this car I might just have to put my naughty little grand niece over my knee and teach her a little respect for her elders. Right on her sky blue rear end.” Amanda broke into a full laugh. I quickly joined her.

A half mile later I asked, “And what exactly does the state of my sexual drive have to do with you and Todd?”

“I like sex too,” my niece answered. My eyebrows shot up questioningly. “More than most girls.”

“And?” I encouraged.

“We work too hard at school. Too many hours.”

“Yes?” Wondering how this all tied in. But I also couldn’t help remembering the slog of medical school that I’d endured forty years earlier. You had no time for anything but school work.

“I had like three dates in second year,” she complained. Amanda had just finished third year. Thinking back I remembered the six months in my third year that I’d lived with two English majors.

“So when I met Todd last summer…”

“Todd is a boy toy?” I had met Todd twice over the previous year and had never got the feeling he was Mr. Stud.

“We both have long hours. And he’s pretty nice.” This pretty nice guy was sleeping with my granddaughter?

“It’s not love. I mean we’re not getting married or anything. It’s just--”

Fortunately I didn’t get to hear any more details of the Todd saga. We’d arrived at the Chasm.

****

“I’ve already painted myself, I just need a touch up,” Amanda said to the pretty, dark haired girl who was one of the girls offering their services as body painters for the parade participants. My niece pulled the can of blue paint that she’d brought out of her purse and handed it to the girl. Then after a quick glance my way, she pulled her sweatshirt over her head. Her shorts and panties quickly followed.

“I’m Amanda,” she introduced herself. Her sky blue tits jiggled.

“Lori,” our personal painter offered, then turned to me and asked, “and you are?” There was a touch of ‘what the hell’s an old guy like you doing in a nude parade with someone her age’ tone in her voice. And a matching look.

I had to pull my eyes away from Amanda’s curves. “Great Uncle Joe ... I’m the chaperone. I’ve been instructed by her mother to protect her from any and all marauding, perverted nudists. It was I who applied her first coat.”

Lori, after a seconds hesitation, laughed as she shook the can of paint. “Yes, those nudists perverts are everywhere,” she agreed as she held the can up to Amanda’s breasts and started to spray. It took her just a minute to touch up the areas that had been smudged in transit. A perfect, light blue, strapless painted bikini was the final result. It fooled you for about one second. Amanda’s puffy nips had tiny erections by the time Lori finished. Blue pubic hair!

“And are you parading Mr. ...?”

“Doctor Joseph Philips. And yes, I thought it would be best to go undercover, to get right in the middle of the action,” I told the smiling young artist. “That’s why the straw hat and sunglasses, so no one will recognise me,” I explained of the disguise I’d brought along.

“Blue too?” she asked, holding up the can.

“I thought maybe white,” I answered after inspecting the row of paint cans that were arrayed on the table beside me.

“And where would you like the paint?”

“I thought just my....” I answered as I pointed downwards.

“Your penis?” There was a cute little smirk on our artists face. I could hear Amanda chuckle from my left. I could feel myself reddening. I nodded. I’d play along.

“Perhaps also on my...”

“Your testicles?” I nodded again. “So, a sexy little white speedo?”

“Ha, ha.” Then all three of us stood around waiting.

“You know you will have to remove your shorts,” Lori finally suggested.

“I think perhaps it would be better if you waited outside the tent Amanda,” I told my niece.

“Why? You saw me,” she complained. “Besides I’ll see you in the parade.”

“Well at least turn around,” I ordered as I turned away from Amanda and faced Lori. I quickly slipped my shorts and underwear off.

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