H is for Heuristic

"Dustin, I'm not human." she said. Her eyes watched for his response.

In his current state of mind, it was as if she spoke a different language.

"What?" he said.

"I'm not a human being, I'm a robot."

Dustin just stared. "What are you talking about?"

Melanie kept her body turned toward him while she moved her hands up to her face. She kept looking right at him while she grasped the sides of her face and with a click removed it from the rest of her head.

Dustin gasped repeatedly as her arms lowered. His eyes met hers, now uncovered and big-looking naked spheres amid a mess of electronics. Each flash of each light emitting diode served only to confound and scare him further as he let his eyes see more of what his own realistic lover had kept so well hidden.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you." she said, not that she was even capable of being sorry about anything.

He watched the deceptively simple looking speaker where her mouth once was. It vibrated as it produced her words and her voice.

He could feel sweat bead on his forehead and on his palms. Everything else felt numb.

"Why?" he said in a weakened voice.

"Why what babe?" she said, calling him by one of their pet-names. "Could you be more specific?"

The only feeling now that cut through his numbness and shock was the trembling, and it took all of his energy not to pass out again. "Why are you a robot?" he asked.

The pattern of flashing that the lights in her head made changed as she computed his statement, and again as she formulated an answer. Dustin surely missed it though.

"I don't know." she said.

Melanie was running the most advanced human emulating AI that Fembot Command had available right now, yet that was the best she could do with a question like that.

Again, Dustin was hardly in any shape to notice or judge the realness of her responses. For him, this whole scene was some sort of awful dream, and he was sure he would soon wake up.

But still the fembot stared him down with all of those intimidating electronics. She patiently waited for him to make the next move.

"Why am I here?"

"We need you to help Byron finish Project H for us."

Dustin had never heard of Project H, but of course he remembered that name. A month ago, Byron had disappeared. And so now Dustin knew that he had too.

Out in the woods, the two pony-tailed blonde androids were getting bogged down in the deep snow by their lack of appropriate footwear. All they had on were shoes, and their mechanical feet were soaking wet from constant submersion in the snow. As cold as it was outside, their robot bodies were overheating due to the strain of the chase.

But the errors in judgement made by the Master Computing Device meant that they were not gaining much on Byron and Heather.

Those two had by now made it to the side of the road, and waited in desperation for a vehicle to pass.

After almost a quarter of an hour, a large truck finally approached. Byron stood by and waved his arms, but the truck went right by him. The driver only stared strangely at the pair trying to hitch a ride in the middle of nowhere.

Byron turned to watch the truck and their first chance of a fast exit fade off in the distance.

He clenched his teeth and bit his tongue. "Next one that comes along, we stand right in front of it." he said angrily.

Heather miscalculated the source of his anger. "I'm sorry." she said, activating some of her dormant personality traits and glancing down to her feet.

Byron walked close and embraced her, even though it pressed some precious warm air out from under his coat. "I'm not mad at you." he said in a more comforting tone. "I'm mad at that fucking driver."

He belatedly flipped the bird to the long gone trucker, and they got into position and waited again. They stood right in the middle of the road, ready to jump quickly into the path of what they hoped would be oncoming traffic.

"How you doing?" he asked the fembot.

"Okay. Everything's functioning like it should."

"Don't worry." he said. "We'll be far away from here soon."

"I don't know how to worry." she reminded him.

He looked at her and smiled a tiny smile through his stern frown. "I wish I could say that."

Chapter 53 - Intercepted

The outside air got no colder, but Byron was losing body warmth fast. His feet were especially cold, and his toes were starting to go numb. Even if he and his android lady friend were picked up at all, he feared he might lose some of those toes to frostbite.

He kept moving, however slightly. He was tired, but still nervous and agitated. He glanced over to Heather, who kept watch over her master. She generated her own heat, and was in fact still trying to dissipate it from her more sensitive electronic components. He wished there was a way he could take the heat she discarded.

"How are you doing?" he asked her.

"I'm doing good." she said. "How are you doing?"

He let a smile creep on to his face at her concern, however contrived and counterfeit it was. "I'm cold." he said. "I hope someone comes along soon. I hope they stop."

He turned around and looked back from where they had come. He dreaded the thought that any minute some unwelcome fembots could march through the snow and the trees. He dreaded the thought of what they might do to him and his new found love.

He began to pace faster, walking past Heather again and again as she followed his movement with the stereo cameras perched above her mechanical neck.

"How's the connection to the laptop?" he asked.

"It's plugged in securely." she assured him.

He nodded and went back to pacing. He was also keenly aware that Heather could instantly go from being his best friend to his worst enemy with the slip of less than an inch of cable. It was only his programming and her temporary but all encompassing 'sense' of loyalty and obedience to him that kept her from dragging him back to the cabin herself.

Then he heard an engine. He stopped in his tracks and silently listened.

He wasn't hearing things. There really was another vehicle. The sound of tires and a gasoline powered motor had never sounded better to him.

Adrenalin surged through his blood as he looked at Heather. She heard the car approaching too, and signified her understanding of the situation by showing Byron a smile.

"Stand at the side of the road." he said while he stood in the middle of the lane. He wasn't sure if the android could get out of the way in time if the car didn't stop.

Byron looked down at his snowshoes as his feet chose and held a stance. "Please..." he thought.

Inside the approaching car, Mike had just woken up, and was coming back to full consciousness to the tune of The Guess Who's "American Woman". Tammy was at the wheel, Anya was in the seat behind her. Mike looked over to Tammy after the line "coloured lights can hypnotise". That had a different meaning for him now.

It had been an uneventful but enjoyable day for this human and his two fembot friends. The danger to Mike from Fembot Command had been only hypothetical so far. Not once had he or Tammy even seen anyone try to come after them. Even Anya, with her built-in robot detection capabilities, had not found any other robots around during her stay with Mike and Tammy.

They had gotten into a more or less polygamous relationship, with each individual partaking freely of the other two's sexual and sensual services. There was no jealousy at all, as the robots weren't capable of it and Mike enjoyed it immensely when Anya and Tammy let him watch.

Without the ability to directly program the Anya robot, Mike and Tammy had opted to give her a mission that was identical to Tammy's - to let Mike teach her how to love. The rest of Anya's undefined behaviour fell into place much like Tammy's had. The only noticeable difference was that because Anya still lacked the human emulation software that Tammy had taken, she appeared to act at best strange and at worst mechanical.

For that reason, Mike strictly limited her interaction with people. The arrangement had worked well for the trio so far, and their extended road trip through Canada had been most pleasurable - especially since the arrival of the unnaturally beautiful Anya robot.

This happy state of being faded somewhat when the car crested the hill to see two lone figures standing on the highway.

Mike could see one of them waving his arms frantically, and he knew that signaled desperation.

"Slow down." he ordered Tammy.

She did so without verbal acknowledgment. None of them said a word until they got close enough to stop. Mike knew that his protective and vigilant fembots were even now computing ways of defending him.

Tammy slowed right down to a crawl as the car came within a few feet of Byron. He stopped his frenetic waving and walked over to the side, signaling Tammy to roll the window down.

"Roll down the window about three inches." Mike said, rightly suspecting that the fembot behind the wheel wouldn't correctly read the arm motions of the human on the road.

Tammy glanced at Mike then held down the switch on the door long enough for the window to come down exactly three inches.

"Can you give us a ride?" Byron said, obviously anxious.

While Tammy calculated variables that were hard for a robot to compute, Mike leaned forward and said "Where you headed?"

"Ottawa." Byron said, even though he knew the car was traveling away from there.

"We were just there." Mike said while Tammy finished up her calculations. She looked to him, then back to Byron.

"Sorry." she said, showing him a comforting look that was eerily close to one that Heather would have shown him.

But before he would have had time to ponder that similarity, Mike interjected and said "We can give you a lift to the next big town up to the Northeast. You look like you need to get off the road."

"Yes, that would be wonderful." Byron said, looking relieved.

Mike motioned the two of them to walk around and sit behind him. He unlocked the right rear door and looked back at Anya, hoping she would keep her overly logical fembot mouth shut for the time being. He leaned back and put his index finger across his lips, hoping she would register the sign for "Shhhh."

Anya looked at him, then right back at Heather, and tracked her every move with her high-resolution cameras.

At the same time, Byron quietly warned Heather not to lean back all the way lest she put too much pressure on the laptop.

Then Byron and Heather bent down and unstrapped their snowshoes. Mike popped the trunk and pointed back with his thumb. Byron nodded and put both pairs on top of the luggage inside. He made a point to shake off as much snow as he could before he did.

The aluminum case went in as well. He closed the trunk and opened the door. Anya kept watching as Byron ushered Heather into the warm vehicle, then got in himself.

Tammy started up down the road as Byron relaxed in the seat and let out a deep breath.

Just behind them, close enough to make detailed scans of the car, but too far away to stop it with bullets were the two blonde fembots. The foot chase came to an abrupt end as they turned around and rushed back to the cabin.

"My name is Mike, by the way." he said as he leaned around and offered his hand for the two to shake.

"I'm Byron." he said, taking off his glove and giving Mike as firm a handshake as his frigid fingers could manage.

"My name is Heather." the just as cold fembot said as she shook Mike's hand.

Mike pointed to his companions and said in turn "This is Tammy and this is Anya."

"Hi" Tammy said, looking at the two through the rearview.

Anya still only looked at Heather.

Heather made a small series of calculations and said "Hi Anya." She turned slightly to the left and offered the silent fembot her hand.

Anya stared back with an expression as cold as Heather's silicone-covered appendage. Loud and clear she announced "Mike, this woman is a robot."

Chapter 54 - Introductions

There was an uncomfortable silence after Anya's statement. Only the radio and the car engine made any sound as Mike and Tammy looked at each other.

Mike thought fast, and flicked the switch to lock all the car doors. He looked over at Tammy and said "Keep driving."

This wasn't how he had expected to meet any additional fembots. A novel situation of helping out two fellow travelers had turned into one where danger lurked.

Friend or foe? Mike wasn't sure about Heather, and he had no way of knowing.

He turned around in his seat and stared meanly at Byron. "Shut her off."

Byron protested. "No, wait, I can explain."

"Shut her off or Anya will." he warned.

Heather looked back and forth between Anya, Mike and Byron. She looked confused, but composed.

"Anya's a robot too." Mike added as he looked unflinchingly into Byron's eyes. "She's very strong."

Byron leaned over to his love as sweat trickled down his forehead. "I'm sorry dear." he said as he took off his gloves and unzipped the front of her jacket.

Mike had a tremble of nerves come over him as he thought that this hitchhiker might pull out a weapon instead. He watched apprehensively as Byron exposed and opened Heather's chest panel. It looked just like Tammy's, and just like Anya's except there was something plugged in to one of the connection ports. When the red power button inside was pushed though, it had the same effect.

Heather froze in position, looking into Byron's eyes.

"Please, don't hurt her." he pleaded. "She's all I have."

Mike found it hard to keep looking tough and mean after seeing another man's display of love for an android, but he kept the pressure on. "What were you doing out on the highway?" he asked. "And don't lie to me, or Anya will punish you."

Byron glanced over to the pretty brunette, now pushed into the role of enforcer. She stared back with a familiar expression - empty and cold.

"We just escaped from a bunch of robots. They call themselves Fembot Command. I was kidnapped, and I took Heather with me."

Mike looked at Byron for a while as he thought about that. "Anya," he said, "he's not a robot too, is he?"

"My scans indicate that this man is not a renegade robot." she said emotionlessly.

Mike looked back to Byron. "Why were you kidnapped?" he said, continuing his interrogation.

"I'm a programmer." he said. "The robots wanted me to finish some AI programming that they couldn't."

Mike looked at Anya, only to visually remind Byron that he'd better be good. "How did you escape?"

Byron took a full breath and explained "I connected a specially programmed laptop to Heather, which overrode her programming. I made sure she would obey only me, and that she wouldn't alert Fembot Command when I tried to escape. We went out snowshoeing like we did every day, only today we never went back."

Mike thought about what he was saying. Could it be that both of these human males were on the run from Fembot Command? If that was true, did Mike want Byron around?

"What exactly did you plan on doing once you got away?" Mike asked.

"I planned on going back to Ottawa, and of course, calling the police."

Mike looked for a moment at the deactivated Heather robot, who still had her head facing Byron's way.

"You seem to care a great deal about her." Mike said.

Byron didn't care to admit it, but he did. "I've fallen in love with her." he said. "I didn't think it was possible, but I did."

"And what do you think would happen to her if you showed her to the police?"

Byron was silent as the car rumbled on the rough surface of the snow and ice covered road. "I hadn't thought of that."

"I'll let you in on a little secret. I'm on the run from Fembot Command too. I thought about going to the police too, but I realised that if I did..." he paused as he looked to the machine driving the vehicle, "I'd never see Tammy again."

Byron looked at Tammy as well. "Is she... also a robot?"

"Yes." Mike said. He softened his harsh tone now. "These girls are far beyond anything in robot technology today. They would be confiscated, as evidence of course, but I would lose the woman I love."

Byron saw something in Mike's eyes as he said that. The more things he found they had in common, the less hostile he was to Byron.

"I feel about Tammy the way you feel about Heather. It's not so strange."

Outside the fast moving car, highway signs and the occasional billboard went by, showing the signals of civilisation on the road ahead.

Inside Byron's head, as in side Mike's head, were thoughts of the most special moments they had shared with their automated companions - those moments when computer generated behaviour had transcended its form and become acts of trust and love.

"Mike," Byron said, "can I reactivate Heather please?"

"Not yet." Mike said. "There are probably fembots coming after you right now, and she might have a homing device inside her or something."

"I'm pretty sure she doesn't." Byron said. "I worked on her for a month. I've seen her inside and out, and I know there's nothing like that inside her."

Mike mulled that over. He knew he wouldn't want Tammy shut down like that. "What's inside that metal case?" he asked.

"That's, um, replacement fluid cartridges for Heather." he said.

Mike nodded. He understood the desire to bring a case like that along. "Okay. Now, you're also certain Heather's loyal to you and not Fembot Command?"

"Absolutely." he affirmed. "As long as she stays plugged in to my laptop, she's completely devoted and obedient to me."

"Where is the laptop?"

"It's strapped to her back."

"If the fembots kidnapped you to program for them, why didn't you just reprogram Heather directly?"

"She has built-in safeguards against that. Besides, every morning she got hooked up to a huge supercomputer that did all sorts of scans on her, and I would have been found out."

Mike considered what had happened to that point. "What do you plan on doing then? Do you still want to go back to Ottawa? Because if you do, and if you want to keep Heather with you, you'll have to hide her."

Byron thought about it, and knew that Mike was right. He couldn't tell the police what had really happened. They would only believe him if he showed them Heather, and then they would surely take her from him. "I don't know yet. Where are you three going?"

"We're just moving around from town to town. We're going nowhere in particular." he answered.

"Can we stay with you until we decide?" Byron asked. He was talking as if Heather would have some say in that decision.

"I guess so." Mike said. "You might even be safer with us. As you can see, Anya can detect androids, although she's not very diplomatic about finding them."

Anya's facial display didn't change at the dig. It was doubtful she even got the meaning.

"Will you let me reactivate Heather then?" he asked.

Mike was silent as he considered letting the desperate hitchhiker turn his companion back on. He tried to think if there was some kind of dire risk involved that he was missing.

"Heather will be no danger to you, you have my solemn word." Byron said.

"Okay then. Reactivate her." Mike said. "But if anything goes wrong, Anya will shut her off again." He looked at Anya to see if she understood, but couldn't tell by looking at her expressionless face.

"Thank you so much." Byron said. He reached out and gently pushed in the red power button built into his woman's chest.

She made a few beeps and some barely audible clicking sounds as she turned her head to face forward. "Heather robot number 742655A-FC activated." she said computer-like. "Loading peripheral extensions.... loading.... loading.... "

She snapped into her human act and looked curiously around. "What happened Byron?"

she asked as she looked at him and grabbed his hand.