Hard Choices

"So?" Jess asked.

"I'm so wiped, I need a nap," I said with a yawn.

"Glad to hear that 'cause I do, too. Separate beds?" she asked.

"Not necessary," I said.

We snuggled our naked bodies together and were asleep within minutes.

It was dark when we awoke. We were back to back with our butts pushed against each other. I moved and Jess spoke.

"Awake?"

"I think so," I said, "but right now I have a hard time distinguishing between reality and fantasy."

Jess spooned me. As her hand alit onto my breast, I pushed my butt hard into her crotch.

"Well, that was something," I said as I traced my finger along her hand.

"Regrets?" she asked and gently squeezed my boob.

"None. You?"

"God, no. I have never had so many orgasms in my life, let alone intense, mind-exploding orgasms. I know I should be worn out, but if Christa walked in now, I'd be begging for more."

"We're here," I said and rolled to face her.

"Yes, we are," she replied and we kissed.

"We didn't..." Jess couldn't finish the sentence.

"I know."

"Didn't you want me?"

"More than you can imagine," I said and kissed her again.

"But?"

"But, God, Jess, I don't know. I totally love you. I think you are so freaking hot it makes me crazy looking at you. But, I don't know if I want us to be friends or lovers. Does that sound totally stupid?"

Jess pulled me so our breasts pressed together. "No. It's sorta the way I feel, too. But I hear about others and friends with benefits."

"I think that only works in theory," I said. "Sure, some of those erotic sites talk about it, in reality though, it must be hard to pull off. Especially with a roommate."

"What do mean 'especially with a roommate'?"

"Ok, say we go all out?"

"Like going down on each other?" she asked.

"Just like that. What if we started a no 'holes' barred sexual affair?"

Laughing at my play on words, she said, "No holes like what Christa did to our back doors?"

I blushed and said, "God, that was unreal. No one has ever done that to me before."

"Me neither. But I liked it. Did you?"

"Would it make me a total slut if I said yes?"

We looked at each other. "Fuck it, I don't care. I loved it."

We laughed and squeezed each other. "So, what if we did the whole thing. Oral, sixty-nine, anal, whatever? Would we have to be exclusive? What if one of us wanted to out with a guy? Or, another girl? We'd have so much shit to work through. Plus, as much as I think full sex between us would be fucking awesome, I couldn't bear to lose you as my friend."

We lay together for a long time not speaking, just stroking each other's faces and bodies. I knew Jess was thinking about what I said.

"I think you're right, Susie. I couldn't stand losing you as a friend, even if that means we will never be lovers."

We kissed. "Of course, what we're doing right now ain't bad," I said.

Pushing her tongue inside me, Jess made love to my mouth with hers. Coming up for air, she said, "not bad at all."

I rolled onto my back and pulled her on top. We looked into each other's eyes. "So?" I said.

"So, what?" she replied.

"So how was oral with Christa?"

Jess's face turned scarlet. She squirmed and I felt her warm pussy rub against mine. I thought I even detected some moisture.

"I really have no words to describe it. I never imagined sex could be like that. I literally was out of my mind. I lost track of where I was. All I knew was I never wanted that sensation to stop. I came hard."

"You squirted," I said.

"Oh, my god. I did?"

"Almost had to start building an ark."

We both laughed, our tummys bouncing against each other.

"Lived up to your dreams? You know, seeing the mass of red hair between your legs."

"I forgot I told you about that," Jess said. "It was like living a dream. My god, her tongue can do things..."

"Yeah, it sure can." We laughed some more.

"How was it when you went down on her? I know that was your first time."

"It's hard to describe," she said and eased herself off to lay beside me. "I was really frightened. Would I hate it? Could I stick my tongue in a woman's vagina? What if the taste grossed me out? Does this mean I'm really lesbian? These and a dozen other questions were racing through my mind as I was looking at the tangle of red hair and the thick lips inches from my face.

"But then I smelled her. It was overpowering. I thought that this is what sex smells like. I liked that smell, Susie, I liked it a lot. When my tongue touched her pussy, all those other questions disappeared. The only question remaining was why I waited so long to do this."

I pulled her face to mine and we kissed. It was gentle, but still affected me deeply. This is a beautiful soul in my arms.

Jess continued describing her sex with Christa. "I remember what you said about the times you did oral on a woman. I immediately got what a rush it was to make a woman feel that way by using my mouth and tongue. I wanted to devour her. I'm not sure if I was doing anything right, but I was loving it."

Stroking her hair, I said, "I was watching Christa. By her reactions I'd say you were doing things very, very right."

"I hope so. After a bit, I also understood that I was getting off on getting her off. I really enjoyed tasting her, licking her. God, that sounds so porno saying it out loud."

"Jess, that's so beautiful. It really makes me want to do that to you."

"But, we aren't, are we?"

I closed my eyes and slowly shook my head. "I want you as my best friend. I want to be able to pour my heart out to you. I want...I want to tell you about my sex life and have you help me see things clearly. Without your insight, I'd probably have given the Jerk another chance."

"Nah, you're way too smart for that."

"Maybe not," I replied. "Anyway, that's the Jess I want. If we become exclusive lovers—and that would be the only way I would want to be with you—I would be giving up a good part of our relationship. So, let's see if we can keep it at this level."

Jess kissed me and ran her hands over my breasts and brushed between my legs. "Some may say that we're kidding ourselves. If we can do this with each other, some may say we are lovers."

My skin tingled at her touch. "Some may say that, Jess. But, I know there is a world of difference between what we're doing now and if we were eating each other out. Big difference."

Jess kissed me. Tears were welling in the corners of her eyes. "I love you, Susie. I want you to be in my life forever. I will agree to anything that makes us stay close."

"Love you, too, babe," I said. "So, how about we think about Christa fucking Calvin and then coming over to give us all the details."

"Can she give us something more than just the details?" Jess asked with a wicked grin.

"God, I hope so." We laughed and held each other tight.

More to come...