Hard Times with Mom Ch. 13

"Just imagine being that helpless and vulnerable. Somebody could do anything they wanted to you and you wouldn't be able to resist." She looked at the picture again herself and I saw her bare nipple stiffen as I watched. Mom set the fetish magazine down next to me and picked up the other two off my nightstand. "Hustler is dirtier, isn't it? The girls spread their pussies and everything, don't they?"

"Yeah, Playboy is a bit tamer."

"I'll take the Hustler then, if that's okay?" She flipped through it in front of me as casually as if it were a copy of Better Homes and Gardens. "Are any of the pages stuck together?" She gave me a sly smirk.

"No."

"Aww," she pouted. "Are you going to masturbate after I leave?" Her eyes drifted back to my unflaggingly hard cock.

"Yes." I waited until her eyes came up to meet mine. "But I won't be using a magazine, I'll be thinking about you." I dropped my gaze to her naked breast for emphasis. Her hand went to her bare nipple, and she pinched it and rolled it between her fingers while I looked on.

"Okay, then," she swallowed uncertainly and covered herself up. "I'll leave you alone so you can stroke that big ol' cock of yours in private." I had the distinct sense that she was waiting for me to invite her to stay and watch, but I had to force myself to keep to my plan. She wasn't making this easy for me at all.

"Thanks," I croaked. "Have fun with your new magazine."

"I sure will," she said as she reluctantly got up and headed for the door. "Do you want this off?" she asked and I nodded. She turned off my light and headed back to her room. Mom left my door open, and it was certainly not by accident.

I ran my fingers up and down my shaft, energized by the fresh image of my mother sitting next to me almost naked. I heard a faint moan of pleasure. Mom had apparently left her door open on purpose, as well. The sounds of her masturbation became distinct as her self-pleasure intensified. This was killing me.

I knew I could step out into the hallway and look into my mother's room and see her playing with herself. She'd be sprawled out on the bed, completely naked, legs spread and fingers buried in her hairy pussy. She would be fucking her fingers and probably sucking on her own nipples. Mom wanted me to see her, she wanted me to jerk off while I watched her come. All I had to do was get up and go to her.

But I couldn't. I mustn't. I had to stay strong and trust in my plan. I stroked myself faster as I heard my mother's moans of pleasure growing louder. I couldn't let her drag me back into this pattern of childish sexual encounters.

Mom fooled herself into thinking that once her life was back on track she could just pack away her incestuous urges like some toys she had outgrown. But it was obvious she was realizing her desire for me was still burning within her. She didn't want to deal with it directly, though, Mom wanted to lure me into making the first overt physical move. In this way she could delude herself into believing it was me forcing myself on her, and she could convince herself she was the innocent victim.

I went to my door, intending to close it as quietly as I could. But then I heard her voice.

"I love my son's cock so much. Mommy wants her baby's big cock," she moaned to herself, but not in her usual whisper. She wanted me to hear. "I want it in my mouth, I want it in my ass, I want his cock in my cunt." Instead of closing the door like I had intended, I was instead standing there in my room beating off like mad to the sound of my mother talking dirty.

"It feels so good when I fuck myself and think of my little boy licking my cunt for me. He sucks his Mommy's pussy so good. I want to come all over his face. I want to come in his mouth so he can taste how much I love him."

That did it for me. My body tensed and tingled, and my cum gushed out of my cock, splattering against the door frame and down onto the new carpet. I squeezed the last drops out and licked them off of my fingers, just like Mom would have wanted.

"I need him in my cunt so bad. I need him to fuck my horny cunt. I want my baby to make me come again! Mommy wants to come! Mommy's pussy is going to come. Mmmmm, yes! Yes!" she cried out, not holding anything back. "YES!"

The frustration knotted my stomach and I almost felt like I was on the verge of tears. I knew that I could go to her room where she was laying only a few steps away. She'd be naked with her legs open, her pussy swollen and ready. She wouldn't even resist. I could walk right in and slide my cock inside her waiting pussy and it would be just like it was only a week ago. I eased my door closed and returned to bed.

I can't deny there was a moment when I became angry with her. But I quickly recognized it for the destructive feeling it was, and put it aside. She wasn't doing this to intentionally torture me. She loved me and wanted to be with me, she just didn't know how.

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"Are you mad at me?" Mom asked when I came into the kitchen for breakfast the next morning. It wasn't asked as an accusation, but more out of a hurt uncertainty.

"Of course not." I kissed her on the forehead. "Why would I be?"

"I don't know, I guess...never mind."

I was acutely aware of her own frustration and confusion in that moment. I wasn't rising to her sexual bait, and she couldn't figure out why. All I could do is hope that I was doing the right thing, and that my plan would eventually bring us even closer together.

A horn beeped outside.

"That's my ride. Have a good day at work." I gave her another quick smooch on the cheek and headed out.

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After that we remained open with each other around the house. Mom rarely closed her bedroom door when she changed, she'd use the toilet while I was in the shower, and watch TV with me evenings in her see-through nightie, or just a little tank-top and panties. For my part, I wasn't shy about lounging around the house in just a pair of boxers, or crossing the hall to and from the shower with nothing on.

I can't quite explain what it was exactly, but even with all this freedom things were somehow different. It wasn't so much like she was trying to entice me into violating her 'rules' any longer. She was now almost just flaunting herself, as if to say 'this is what you could have had and passed up.' She must have been feeling rejected, and was probably angry with me as well. Maybe not consciously, but on some level she wanted to hurt me for not playing her game.

I responded by doing everything I could think of to be the responsible adult. I began taking care of my own laundry, and made sure I never left a mess that Mom had to clean up after me. I normally got home from work before her, and began making dinner for us. It wasn't much at first, but Mom seemed to appreciate the effort. I took care of the yard, and even paid our first electricity bill myself. I had to make sure there was no way I could be considered the dependant around this house.

While I was doing all this, I never lost sight of how great my mom was. I loved her as a parent and as a woman. She'd had things rough and deserved for someone to take care of her for a change. During those weeks I was able to achieve some clarity after a lot of thinking and came to the realization that, even if we never had sex again, my mom was an incredible lady and I was lucky just to have her in my life. I made every effort to show her this with frequent hugs, and kisses, and little gestures that let her know how special she was.

Although I could sense the occasional undercurrent of tension between us, things were generally going well, until one Friday night when things got ugly. Mom had been out with some of the women from work, and she had a few margaritas in her when she arrived home. She was in a great mood and told me all about how some Japanese business men were hitting on them. She was all giggly and happy as she opened a bottle of wine to keep her buzz going.

Mom went and changed out of her clothes and came back to the living room in just a long night shirt. When she sat down with her glass of wine I caught a peek of her ass and could see she wasn't wearing any panties. We talked, and laughed, and were enjoying being with each other. After a quiet pause, Mom set her glass aside and tried to get serious.

"Sweetie, there was something I wanted to talk to you about."

I turned down the volume on the TV, ready to listen.

"I've been thinking it over," she said, "and I haven't been very fair to you. I know I said we have to be like a 'normal' family now that we're getting our lives back in order, but I realized how difficult it must be for you. It wasn't right for me to just take everything away all of the sudden. You know what I mean?"

"I've been doing a lot of thinking myself, and you don't have to worry. It's okay, I understand." Her expression told me this wasn't what she wanted to hear from me.

"You're such a good boy, and I know you're only saying that to make me happy. But I was thinking I don't have to be so strict about things as long as it's just you and me around here."

"I'm really all right with things the way they are," I assured her.

"Obviously we can't go crazy like we did before," she continued heedless of my response. "But I don't see any harm in being a little more open with each other in the privacy of our own home. For example, if you want to look at my pussy while you masturbate before bed, or something like that, it would be okay."

"You know what that would lead to, Mom."

"No, it doesn't have to go that far. We can tease each other a little and not let it get out of hand--so to speak," she giggled. "Look, I even have a surprise for you."

Mom pulled up her t-shirt a bit exposing herself to me. Before I could say anything she opened her legs and displayed her pussy. My objection caught in my throat.

"See? I shaved it for you a little." She showed off her new grooming style and I was struck breathless. She still had a thick tuft of hair above, but she had shaved the sides of her pussy clean. I could clearly see the rounded arc of her puffy outer lips, smooth and inviting. Her sensuous slit was no longer hidden in a dark pubic tangle. Mom's inner labia was already swollen with excitement and peeked out from the intimate folds of her bare pussy. "Do you like it?"

It was like seeing my Mom's pussy again for the first time.

"Of course I like it. I mean, I love it no matter what, but that is beyond sexy."

Mom practically glowed with joy at my reaction. My hard-on was pushing insistently within my boxers, but I kept myself from grabbing hold of it.

She reached down and spread herself open. Her stiff clit stood out in obvious arousal. Her engorged inner lips parted to reveal the fleshy pink within, and Mom's vagina was unveiled, open and beckoning to be touched and licked and fucked.

"Go ahead, sweetie," she whispered huskily. "Take your penis out and play with it if you want. Look at Mommy's pussy and masturbate your cock. It's okay, I want you to."

It was so tempting. I got up and moved to sit next to her. An involuntary gasp escaped from my mother as she focused on the bulge in my shorts, anticipating what might come next. I took her chin delicately and tilted her head up so she was looking at my eyes instead of my cock.

"You've had a little too much to drink tonight. If I let this happen you won't be happy tomorrow--with me or with yourself." I tried to keep my voice steady as I reasoned with her.

"I won't be upset, I promise, sweetie," she pleaded. "I want you to look at my pussy. I want to see your penis and watch you come."

"I know you do, and I want that, too. But not tonight. Not like this."

Her expression became one of almost confused panic. She dipped two fingers into her pussy hole, wetting them with her juices, and quickly brought them to my lips.

"Please don't say no to me. I need you." She teased her fingers over my lips. Her familiar scent was intoxicating. I felt my resolve weaken, and I couldn't stop myself from licking her fingers. "That's it, taste my pussy, sweetie. Mommy's cunt misses her baby so much." Her other hand found its way to my hard-on, and that snapped me out of my haze.

"I'm sorry," I whispered and tenderly took her wrists and put her hands down by her sides. "I love you, and that's the only reason I'm saying no to you tonight." I slid her shirt down to cover her nakedness. She looked at me not knowing whether to cry or scream. She decided to scream.

"Fine! I get it!" She stood up fast, almost losing her balance. "You had your fun with me and you're done! You got to shove your dick in your pathetic, horny mom, and now it makes you sick to even look my crusty old cunt! I know how it is!"

"That's not it at all, I--"

"Bullshit! You know, there's a million cocks out there that would love to fuck this old pussy of mine!"

"Don't be mad, please. Don't be like this."

"You decided this is how it is, so deal with it. I'm going to my room and fuck myself silly. Have fun whacking off all alone." Her last words came out as a sob, before she hurried away unsteadily to her room. Moments later I heard her door slam. My cock had shriveled up during the yelling and I felt like I'd never have another erection again.

I could hear Mom wailing in her room, and it broke my heart. I questioned everything in that moment. What was I doing? Was I going about this all wrong? I felt like it had been going so well, then in a matter of seconds it all fell down around my ears. I wanted to go to her and make it right. I wanted to kiss away her tears; tell her I was wrong; do whatever it took to make her happy.

Aunt Linda told me that I would know what the right thing to do was when the time came. I knew how much that must have hurt Mom, but I also knew what I wanted was right. And not just for me, but for us. I had to find a way to get her to understand that, but I didn't know how.

Maybe that was the whole problem. I was too young and inexperienced to deal with something this big. This wasn't little boyfriend-girlfriend fooling around crap. This was a mature woman, with a lot of experience and emotional history, who needed a mature relationship. Maybe she needed more than I was capable of giving her.

I spent the night on the couch, unable to sleep, but not wanting to go to my room where I'd be close enough to hear my mother weeping. After running through all the scenarios, and questioning all my choices, I was no closer to knowing what to do next when morning came.

Mom shuffled sheepishly into the living room wrapped in her long, terry-cloth bathrobe. She sat down on the chair, looking like she didn't want to be there, and took a long while before she mustered the will to speak up.

"I said some awful things last night," she began, unable to look at me as she spoke in a low, raspy voice--her throat raw from a night of crying. "I'm so ashamed about how I acted, and I--"

"You don't have to say anything," I interrupted.

She sniffled, and wiped her eyes before I could see any tears fall. "I owe you--"

"It's okay. Really." I went and knelt next to her and took her hand in mine. "You've got a lot going on right now with the new job and house, and dealing with the divorce. The last thing I want is to be another problem for you. You don't owe me anything. Especially not an apology, if that's what you were thinking. I love you more today, than I've ever loved you before. Honestly."

"I don't deserve it." She covered her face with her hands. "I don't deserve you."

I stood and drew her up with me. I locked her in my arms and held her as she cried into my shoulder. I was prepared to stay like that forever if that's what it took. After a while her sobs lessened, and she put her arms around me, returning the hug. She squeezed me hard, like she was clinging to the only thing in her life that made any sense.

I knew then that I had been right.

"I'm going to the mall today and get some new clothes," I said softly. "I could use some help if you're not busy."

"You don't really want me tagging along, do you?"

"You know I have no sense of style. I could really use your help."

"Are you sure?" She pulled away from my shoulder and looked hopefully at me. Even with reddened eyes and runny nose she was as beautiful to me as ever.

"If you behave yourself, I might even buy you a fancy lunch at the food court."

She smiled despite herself. "I better go get cleaned up then."

We exchanged one more quick hug and she headed for the shower.

The shopping trip started kind of shaky as we were both still a little guarded following the emotional fireworks. But after an hour of trying on clothes in various stores, we fell back into our comfortable way with each other. We ate lunch and had more fun than we should have people watching, and as a result came up with the maxim that the bigger the cowboy hat, the smaller the penis.

As we strolled around after lunch I took Mom's hand. She acted like it was no big deal, but I knew her well enough to know that she'd be worried about what people might think when they saw us. After a few minutes I felt her relax. She gave my hand a squeeze to let me know she was enjoying walking hand in hand with me out in public.

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After the blow up Mom had become suddenly modest around the house again. This was more than a little disappointing for me. My plan still precluded things going to the extreme between us, but it was nice to get the occasional peek at Mom's beautiful breasts or shapely ass. It was more than just the sexual thrill it gave me, it felt good knowing that she was comfortable enough around me to be herself and not have to hide anything.

I puzzled out what was going on one night while we were watching TV. Mom was once again wrapped up in her frumpy, terry-cloth robe, as she had been every night since that day.

"Aren't you hot in that thing?" I asked.

"A little, but I'm fine." A few quiet minutes passed before she spoke again. "Do you want me to put something else on?"

It seemed like a strange question at the time, but I answered without thinking much of it.

"I like that blue nightie--the one with the puffy shoulders."

At the next commercial break, Mom went and changed. She came back wearing the sheer blue nightie I liked. I could see that she had on panties underneath, but no bra. The way the nearly transparent fabric bloused around her breasts made them look even bigger than they actually were. Her nipples stood out against the filmy material betraying her excitement to be showing off for me once more. She did a little turn.

"Better?"

"Much." I smiled. She sat down and settled in with a contented grin.

After I thought about it, I figured out that she was letting me set the boundaries this time around. And I don't think it was so much a conscious design on her part, but more of a subtle acknowledgment that a certain amount of authority had shifted to me. In this one small way she was giving herself over to my control, and letting me steer the course. I confirmed my theory shortly after.

I went into her room one morning while we were both getting ready for work. She was in the shower and I knocked.

"Can I borrow your toothpaste? I'm out."

"I'm in the shower, hon, just a sec," she called back. I didn't wait and went ahead in. I grabbed the toothpaste from next to the sink, and as I turned to leave I took a good look at my mom behind the clear glass doors of her shower. Her hair was full of suds that ran in curvy rivers down her body. Her smooth skin shined wetly. She was a vision of pure sensuality.

"Don't forget to wash behind your ears," I joked as I left, never taking my eyes off her.

After that she resumed popping into my bathroom while I was in there to pee, or put something away while I was showering. This confirmed my suspicions, and I soon used my unspoken authority to reestablish our formerly uninhibited demeanor around the house.