tagHumor & SatireHarmless Office Fun Ch. 02

Harmless Office Fun Ch. 02


It all started out as just a drunken mistake. I couldn't really blame Julia for what happened; she had way too much to drink and wasn't thinking clearly. The following Monday that it happened she apologized for her behavior. We had a good laugh about it and then just let it go as a mistake. That's how it usually goes with people who work in offices together for a long time. The real problem was to tell my wife what happened and the result of those actions of telling her.

The incident that I'm talking about happened after the company's New Year's party. They were usually a lot of fun and there was a lot of alcohol to drink as you can imagine. Everybody was there, and most of us had a date, be it a spouse or a boyfriend or girlfriend. My friend Julia was there with her boyfriend Thomas, I on the other hand had to go alone. It wasn't that my wife, Becky didn't want to come. She was stuck in Canada when she was visiting some friends for a couple of days and her flight had to be cancelled because of engine problems and she couldn't get another flight. So she had to stay in Canada with her friends for New Year's and I was here with my friends and colleagues.

I explained this at the party, everybody understood. Some of the guys joked that I should've brought a date that my wife wouldn't know about, if you know what I mean. That kind of joking didn't fly well with some of the other ladies at work. Although, Julia did have a good laugh about it, she was cool like that.

Julia that night was wearing a tight black dress with one shoulder strap. She's about 5'4", nice curves, and long black hair. I once had a crush on her back when we knew each other in college, but it never went anywhere which was a good thing because she was a cool girl friend and I didn't want to jeopardize that. Plus, if I did do something about that than I would never have met my wife, Becky.

The night was going pretty smoothly, everybody was dancing, telling stories and jokes. We told each other about our New Year's resolutions and than talked abut which one of those we probably would forget about, or if we did do them which ones we would give up on quickly. That's how it goes every year with those resolutions.

Around 10:30pm, there were the usual people we expected to start getting drunk and had to be watched out for because they need supervision. Surprisingly, one of the people we expected to get drunk didn't do so because he actually kept that resolution to stop drinking. And two people who went through some bad divorces that never get drunk themselves, did so this time.

It was also about that time that I noticed something going on with Julia and her boyfriend. I saw them in the far off corner; they were arguing but trying not to show it because there were people around. Then they both stormed out of the room and I saw them go into one of the offices.

"Looks like Julia is celebrating early," someone next to me said.

I looked over and saw Jake Miles smiling. He was the office pervert so it was no surprise that sex was the first thing that came to mind for him. A minute later, Julia and Thomas both left that office. Julia walked back to the party, pretending that everything was normal, while Thomas stormed down the hallway in the opposite direction.

"That didn't take long," Jake said. "I would be pissed at him too if I that's how long I took."

Julia walked up to me and Jake, thankfully, went away.

"Is everything alright?" I asked.

"Everything is great," she said with a big fake smile.

"I saw what happened," I said. "You want to talk about it?"

"No, what I want is to drink."

She snatched the glass or champagne I had in my hand and swallowed it all in two seconds. Then we both went to the bar to get more champagne.

"I'm sorry, Alan," she said. "It's just that, Thomas can be such an ass."

She swallowed her champagne fast again and asked the bartender for another.

"You should take it easy," I told her.

"I'll be fine."

"That's what you said in the last year of college—"

"Don't you dare say it," she said angrily.

"When you broke up with your boyfriend—"

"You're a bastard," she said smiling this time.

"And you got drunk at the frat party and got naked."

She laughed hard. Then took another glass of champagne.

"And if it wasn't for you I would've gone upstairs with those two football players," she said.

"Something I'm not sure if you appreciated or hated me for," I replied.

"Appreciated," she said. "Although I wouldn't mind a couple of football players screwing me right now."

She drank some more and more, and by 11pm she was buzzed. She was bumping into people, laughing inappropriately at the dumbest stuff, worst yet she was flirting with Jake. I didn't see the whole thing because I was on the phone with my wife seeing how she was. She complained about the cold and wished she was back home with me.

By 11:30 Julia was definitely wasted. Worst yet, it looked like she was getting ready to leave the party with Jake and I couldn't let that happen. I had to intervene and ran through a bunch of people just before the got to the elevator.

"That's ok, Jake, I got her," I told him.

"No, dude, its ok, I got this one," he said with a perverted smile on his face.

"I know where she lives," I said.

"I thought I'd just take her to my place, its closer."

"You're not taking her anywhere Jake," I said intently.

"Let's ask Julia," he said. "Julia, who do you want to leave here with?"

He made her look at him, hoping that would get her to say Jake instead of my name.

"ALAN!" She said laughing. "I want to go with my buddy, Alan."

She pushed Jake away and gave me a big hug.

"Take me home buddy," she said.

"Will do, buddy," I told her.

Jake stormed off, mumbling to himself that he hadn't got laid in 8 months.


The ride back to her place was no picnic. She kept playing with my radio station settings, playing with the stuff in my glove compartments and sticking her finger in my face, laughing about how squishy my face feels. It was ok, because I planned to tell her about that childlike behavior on Monday and make fun of her about it.

In her apartment, she was hanging off my shoulder as I was dragging her across her living room. She pointed to where here bedroom was and I took her there.

"Here we are," I told her.

"Thank you, Alan," she said. "You're awesome."

In the bedroom I got her on the bed and took off her shoes.

"I'll be leaving now," I told her. "Have a good night."

"Don't you want to stay with me," she said.

"That won't be a good idea," I said.

Just as I was about to leave she called out to me.

"Just a moment," she said. "I have to tell you... tell you something... something important."

"What is it?"

"Come here," she said.

I walked up to her.

"Come closer," she said.

I came closer to her face and she grabbed me by the head and pulled me to her lips. I was too stunned to know what to do and it took me a few seconds to think that I had to let go. But she was very strong and held that kiss for a long time. Not that it wasn't a bad kiss, it was spectacular, and part of me did want it to keep going. But I'm a married man and she was obviously drunk so I need to let go. But like I said, she's very strong. She was so strong that she even grabbed one of my hands and put it on her breast. It was right above the dress, but I had to admit it great. I even gave it a few gentle squeezes. But I realized what I was doing and forced hand away and eventually I forced her to stop kissing me.

She laughed and than kind of dozed off to sleep. I just stood there watching her, with a half stiffy in my pants. Strange thoughts crossed my mind, but I was a gentleman and left the apartment.


The next day was a Saturday; my wife found a flight and managed to get home safely. We were both relieved to see each other. We talked all the way home from the airport; she told me everything that she did in Canada with her friends for New Year's.

In our apartment we were having dinner and the subject of what I did for New Year finally came up.

"So anything fun happen there?" she asked.

"Well, there is something I think I should tell you about," I told her.

"What is it sweetie."

From the beginning I told her about Julia drinking and how that Jake was about to take her to his place and I intervened. She thought it was very chivalrous of me and she knew about Jake, she really hated him. But then I told her about the incident in her bedroom which gave her a huge shock. Keep in mind I didn't tell her everything that had happened. I didn't tell her how Julia made me grab her breast, and I told her the kiss only lasted 5 seconds.

She sat there silent for a very long time. I told her it was just a drunken mistake on Julia's part, that she had no idea what she was doing.

"Oh, that tramp knew what she was doing," she said angrily.

"Come one, honey, she was drunk," I told her.

"Yeah, defend the slut some more. That makes things much better."

She jumped out of her chair and stormed off to the bedroom.


On Monday, everything was back to normal at the office. Not normal for me though because I had two days of my wife being pissed off at me for something that I had no control over. At first I felt guilty that I didn't tell her about grabbing Julia's breast but now I'm glad because then the shit would've hit the fan.

There was a knock at the door, I looked up and saw Julia standing in the doorway. She was looking much better than when I last saw her.

"Can I come in?" she asked.

"Have a seat."

She came in and took the seat across from me at my desk.

"I just wanted to say how sorry I am," she began to say. "I feel like such a slut."

"It's ok, you were drunk," I assured her.

"I have to ask," she was really nervous at this point. "Did I really make you... you know..."

"You grabbed my hand and put it on your breast," I said.

"Oh my God," she said. She turned her head away in embarrassment then turned back to me. "I am so sorry for that."

"I'm not," I said smiling.

She laughed.

"I'm sure you didn't," she said and laughed some more. "But still, I am sorry for my behavior and thank you for being a gentleman."

"It's no problem," I said. "By the way, I have something to tell you."

I told her what happened to me over the weekend with my wife, how upset she was. I even told Julia how I didn't tell Becky all the details of that night. She understood why I didn't especially with how my wife reacted to the shortened version of the story.

"Oh my," said Julia. "I have to talk to her."

"Oh no," I said. "That's not going to happen."

"I have to, I need to apologize."

"She's already pissed over a five second kiss. This might make things worse."

"Well, lets just wait a week then and then I will apologize to her."

I thought for a moment. "Maybe a week, she might calm down by then."


A week later, Becky was still pissed off. It was a nightmare for me. No matter what I did, nothing could make Becky forget what happened.

I was going to tell Julia to forget about apologizing and to maybe wait a year, but then I got a call from Becky. She said she felt bad about how she behaved the past week. She went on to say that even though she didn't like what had happened, she understood now that it was one drunken mistake on Julia's part, she didn't realize what she was doing and that I reacted appropriately when I pushed myself away from that kiss. I said everything was ok, lets move on and then I invited her to come by the office for lunch. I also figured that since she was now calmed down this would give Julia the chance to apologize with no problems. I was wrong.

When Becky came to my office's floor she was stopped by Julia who wanted to apologize. Suddenly Becky, forgetting everything she said to me on the phone, got angry again and attacked Julia in the middle of the office. Everybody was screaming as Becky was grabbing at Julia's hair and tried throwing her around. Julia responding by grabbing at Becky's throat trying to get her to stop. Everybody in the office was standing around, screaming, and cheering them on.

I ran through the cheering crowd and pulled them apart. I grabbed Becky and pulled her away to my office while two other male co-workers were holding Julia back by her arms. Like I said before, Julia was unusually strong and she nearly got free from them a few times.

"SLUT!!!" yelled my wife as I was dragging her away.

"PSYCHO BITCH!!!" Julia yelled back at her.


I got Becky to calm down in my office and made her go home. When the coast was clear I went to Julia to see if she was alright.

Before I even got there, Thomas came barging out of her office. He saw me and charged at me. He picked me up and slammed me down on to someone's desk. Again, everybody was gathering around screaming and cheering for us as we exchanged body blows. It didn't last long before some sane people interfered and separated us.


After everything was explained to our bosses, with a large amount of white lies, everything went back to normal. But everybody in the building was talking about the fights that had occurred, and already rumors were swirling on what they were about. I got from my secretary that the rumors were that Julia and I was having an affair and both my wife and her boyfriend found out. This was something else we need to explain if our bosses heard those rumors.


It was 7pm; I was alone in my office. I decided not to go home; it didn't matter anyway because my wife called to say she was staying at her sisters for the night. But I didn't want to go home alone so I stayed doing some extra work. Also, I had a bottle of scotch in my drawer and I took sips of it every now and then.

"Can I come in," a voice said.

I looked up and saw Julia in the doorway.

"Are you sure it's safe?" I asked jokingly.

There was a couch in my office and we sat next to each other on it, taking sips of my vodka, but we were careful not to drink too much. She told me that unlike the story I told Becky, she told Thomas everything, including the breast grab, which explained why Thomas attacked me in the office the way he did. Julia went on and on apologizing for everything, taking the blame for all the trouble that she had caused me. I assured her I wasn't mad and that it was alright.

"I can't believe this happened," she said.

"Me neither," I said.

"Now everybody thinks we're having an affair," she said.

"So you've heard about that I see."

"No," she said. "I was only joking. Are people really saying that around here?"

I nodded and she took a big gulp of the scotch.

"It probably would make things simpler if we did sleep with each other," I said and chuckled.

"Why do you say that?" she asked.

"Because, at least it would've been worth it if the rumors are going to persist."

"Well, you had your chance on New Year's," she said. "It's your fault for being a gentleman and not taking advantage of me."

"Yeah, I am a prick," I said. "I should've just raped you when I had the chance."

We both laughed and drank some more.

"Thomas broke up with me," she said.


"Its ok, it was going to happen anyway. He's an asshole. He cheated on me once."


"Yes," she said and took another drink. "I forgave him for it and yet he gets mad at me for a drunken kiss and a titty grab."

"He is an asshole,"

We both agreed and drank some more. The bottle of scotch was empty by then. It was already half full when I pulled it out of my drawer. We weren't drunk but we were definitely buzzed.

"It's too bad," Julia said.

"Too bad for what?"

"That you didn't get to feel my breast. I have great tits and you didn't get to feel them."

"I did feel it," I said.

"Only from above my dress, not the skin."

She looked at me with a devilish smile and I gave her a wicked smile of my own.

"Can I have a feel now?" I asked.

Her smile grew wider and she began unbuttoning her blouse. My dick was immediately getting hard and moving upwards in my pants. She took off her blouse and there were her great 38D breasts being held up by a lacey pink bra.

I moved closer to her on the couch. I took the tips of my fingers and gently touched her breast right above the bra line. Julia's began breathing heavier and I felt her heart beat faster from where I was touching her. I leaned in and kissed her on the lips. I pulled my head back and looked deeply into her eyes. We kissed each other again and held it there for a long time. Then slowly I moved my tongue into her mouth and she did the same.

I put my arms around her body and pulled her closer to me. We held each other there for several minutes, just making out with each other. Then I reached up and unclasped her bra. I took the bra off her and pulled away from the kiss. I looked down and saw her beautiful breasts. I took my hands and placed them on her breasts and gave them both a nice squeeze. She was right, they were wonderful. I began kissing her neck, she really liked it. I moved downwards, kissing her skin all the way down to her left breast. I just kept kissing that breast until she grabbed my head and moved it to get my mouth over her nipple. I took that nipple into my mouth and began sucking on it like it was a piece of candy. Julia began moaning and told me to keep doing what I was doing. I kept on sucking on the nipple, even pulling on it and giving it gentle bites.

Eventually I pulled my head away from her breasts and we began taking each other's clothes off until we were completely naked. She got me to stand up and moved me to my desk where I leaned on its edge. She got down on her knees in front of me and began stroking my erection. I was getting goose bumps from the anticipation of what was going to happen next. I could feel her hot breath on the head of my dick getting ready to put it into her mouth. But she was in no hurry; she was taking her time, getting me worked up for what was going to happen next. Finally, she stuck out her tongue ran it up along the shaft. She licked it up and down several times, at the same time looking up at me with those beautiful eyes. Finally, she opened up her mouth and slowly took the whole thing into her mouth. Her lips were sealed around the shaft as she began bobbing her head back and forth, her tongue massaging the shaft as she went along. It was the best blow job I ever had, I was afraid I was going to blow my load into her mouth too soon.

After several minutes she took my dick out of her mouth and I got her to stand up. I threw all the contents on my desk onto the floor and got Julia to lie down on top of the desk. I then got up on the desk as well and placed myself over her body. She opened her legs wide for me as I pushed my dick all the way inside of her. She smiled and let out a huge moan. As our bodies were pressed against each other I began pumping myself inside of her. I went slowly at first, getting myself used to her body. She had her hands around my back and her nails were gently scratching my back. I quickened the pace and pushed myself into her body harder and faster, with each push she moaned until those moans became screams of ecstasy.

I slowed down a little at one point because I was worried about finishing too soon and I wanted this to last as long as possible. She didn't seem to mind, I assume she felt the same way. I began kissing her lips some more; I loved the way her mouth tasted. I began fucking her faster again and this time with more intensity. She began screaming in my ear again begging me for more and I did my best to give her all that I got. She held me tighter as her body arched upward as an orgasm filled her body. I couldn't hold myself back any longer and followed her orgasm with my own and with one last thrust into her body I shot every bit of cum I had in me into her body.

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