Having Hope

She sighed, "I don't even think I should tell him. He's not really handling things so well, is he?"

"And uh, Josh."

Hope swung her legs off the bed and stood. She made her way to her laptop and sat her desk. "Josh doesn't care about me. He just wants to get laid and honestly with what I had, it's not going to happen." She suspected that her father was a great lover. The soundtrack of his exploits would go platinum but she also knew that her feeling for him had amplified her experience. Being with Josh who she felt nothing for would be a waste of time.

"God Hope please let me have sex with your father. I'll give you those blue heels you love so much. He has to be the one I give my virginity too. I've always loved him...that's why I saved it." She placed her hands together in a praying symbol. "Pleeaasse."

Hope swiveled her chair around to face Erica. "Come on Erica, it isn't like I can just give him to you. Besides, I think he hates me." Hope felt like crying but wouldn't. Her attempt to make things right did nothing but made things worse. Of course screwing your father usually fixed things, in la la land. What did she think was going to happen afterwards? They would have a talked while eating ice cream.

Ok, you played in my cooch and jerked off but it's cool because I sucked you off, got you to lick me dry, and sat on your pole so I guess we're even. And don't worry, I'm your daughter but it doesn't matter. Thought that would work, did she?

A notification tone went off. Erica handed Hope her cell phone. It was a text from Devin, checking on her. She sent him a reply and he replied to it right away. He was giving her a heads up. Her father was on his way home and he was bringing burgers from her favorite place.

"My dad's bringing home burgers from Melba's, you staying?"

"Of course," she said excitedly then cursed, "Oh wait, I can't. Becca needs me to help her with her college apps. I'd better go home now or I won't then I'll have to hear her mouth." Erica stood.

"I wish she was going with us to university." As Hope walked her to the door she wondered if her father would like to have sex with Erica. She was Brazilian and Caucasian, had toffee colored skin, sandy blond hair and light brown eyes. She was blessed with large breast, a small waist, and the signature Brazilian butt. Hope's body wasn't juvenile in the least but compared to Erica's she was lacking.

"Oh, hey Mr. Burk," Erica said, moving out of the way so he could pass.

"Hi Erica," he said looking off kilter. Then he slid by her sideways to get in the house.

Hope moved aside too, "Hi dad," she forced a smiled. He looked at her and for a brief minute it seemed as if he was going to smile. Then his eyes fell to the floor and he scooted past her.

"Hey," he hurried into the kitchen.

Erica leaned back into the house and whispered, "You think if he has sex with me, he'll by me a car too."

Hope pushed her out the door and slammed it in her face. She leaned on the door and breathed. The car was an unexpected gift but she knew it was something he'd been planning for awhile. The shooting and his depression stalled the big reveal but he found away to give it to her eventually.

"What time is Pattie coming home," he called to her from the kitchen.

Devin didn't tell him. "Aunt Pattie moved back in with Carlos. She's not coming over."

Before Hope could make it to the kitchen her father was heading to his room. He'd slammed and locked his doors before she could even blink.

Pattie bailed on him. Of course his sister didn't know the real reason he wanted her to stay with them but maybe if he told her she would stay. Or maybe she would have him arrested. He couldn't tell Pattie. He couldn't tell anyone but Devin. All he had to do was make it through the summer...until College started. Then Hope would be off to New Jersey. He paced the length of his room as he waited for Devin to return his call. His phone rang.

"Pattie's not staying with us anymore," he said before Devin could speak.

Devin sighed, "I know."

"You know? What the hell am I suppose to do now," he yelled.

"Live," Devin yelled back before disconnecting the call.

After sulking, more pacing, and a shower, Mike gathered the courage to leave his room.

"Your burger's cold," Hope told him. She sat at the kitchen table. Half her food was already gone. "I tried to wait for you."

He grabbed up the bag from the counter and a plate from the cabinet. "You didn't have too." Hope stood, went to the refrigerator and pulled out a beer. She set it in front of him and returned to her seat.

"Do you hate me." her eyes lowered to her plate,

Mike looked up into sad yes. "I don't hate you. It's just that I did something that's unforgivable and there's nothing I can do to take it back. Things will never be the same between us."

She bit on her thumb nail. "I'm not stupid. I know things can't be the same but does it have to be like this though. I know what I did-,"

"We did," he interrupted.

"You didn't hurt me. I don't need therapy. I'm not going to become a raving slut. I do know right from wrong and yeah, having sex with you wasn't probably the smartest thing but we did so we have to deal with it. And you aren't dealing. I doubt we're unique, in the grand scheme of things. Did you plan to ignore me forever?" He didn't answer. Hope got to her feet and started backing away from the table. Her beautiful face a mix between anger and devastation. "You were, weren't you? You planned to keep this up until I left didn't you?"

Mike stood up, "Hope, I hate to make this about me. I'm the parent and I could have defused the situation and I went with it. Not only did I go with it I enjoyed it. My judgment is shot to shit."

She came towards him. "Don't do this dad," she reached for him.

Mike held his hands up in defense. "Don't touch me Hope. I dream of being with you in a sexual way. I want to come to your room at night and do-. You can't ever touch me." He moved around her, quickly moved down the hall and into his room.

For hours he listened to Hope cry. It was four hours later and she showed no signs of stopping. Listening to her was killing him. The realization that there was nothing he could do to fix this set in again. He could stay away from Hope and continue to make her miserable or he could try and make it like it was. It would be a façade but it would make her happy.

He wanted her happy but he could no longer pretend he was a father. He needed to get out of this house before he fucking blew up. He needed a damn drink. When he opened his bedroom door it was after nine. He saw the light on in her room. He turned away and walked to the front door. Tonight he was going to get good and shitfaced and hopefully he might get lucky and drive off a fucking cliff.

Chapter Seven

Hope heard the doorbell ring so she rolled off the sofa and went to opened it. "What are you doing here Josh," she asked as she leaned on the frame. "I told you I didn't feel like talking when you called."

Josh looked around her. She turned her head to see what he was looking for then stared back at him. "Your dad here, don't see his truck outside," he smiled. He went up on his tip toes and rocked back.

"I told you he wasn't here," she said impatiently. "Look Josh, this isn't a good time. I'll see you tomorrow." She was closing the door when he stuck his foot in the way.

"Ok...but can I use your bathroom? I'll be quick," he grinned, "promise."

Hope opened the door again and reluctantly moved so he could come in. "Be quick," she said as he burrowed down the hall. When he didn't come back after five minutes she went to find him. The hallway bathroom was dark so he must have used her bathroom...in her room. She cursed as she made her way down the hall to her room. No telling what the hell Josh was doing. Going through her computer, looking through the stuff, whatever he was doing she knew she wouldn't like it.

"Josh...seriously it's time to go," she said irritated. She walked into her room and found him standing over her computer. "What are you doing?" She folded her arms over her chest.

Josh turned around, grinning. "Nothing," he held up his hands, "just looking around." He moved away from her desk. "I wanted to know what your room looked like."

"Now you know, time to go," she pointed to the door behind her.

He walked, no...more like stalked over to her. Stopping in front of her, he took her hand and placed in over the bulge in his pants. She felt it hardening under her touch. "Come on Hope," he said leaning close to her cheek, "I have something for you."

Really? Really? Hope pulled her hand away and pushed at him, "Not interested, now leave before my dad find you here."

"You going to leave me all worked up like this." He moved his hand up her leg towards the opening in her shorts.

"I didn't work you up," Hope pushed his hand away again, "so I won't oblige you so stop playing and go." He grabbed her by her arm, digging his manicured nails in her skin. "Ouch asshole, let go of me."

He pulled her into him so that they were almost kissing, "I came here to fuck you tonight and I'm not leaving until I do." He kissed her hard, mashing his lips to hers.

Wrong move asshole, Hope bit down as hard as she could. Josh shouted a curse then threw her to the floor. Hope did a backwards crab claw, trying to put distance between them but she didn't move fast enough. Josh bent down and grabbed her ankle.

"You'll like it. I know I will." The asshole was using his sexy voice. "Let me taste you Hope. I promise you won't regret it."

He wasn't backing off and it was scaring her. "Josh, don't do this," she begged as he pulled her closer to him. Sliding towards him she began to scream. Hope kick at him as hard as she could with her free foot. He grunted as he grabbed his shin allowing her to scrambled away and get to her feet.

Josh howled in pain, "you fucking cunt tease."

Hope ran down her hallway but Josh was on her before she made it into the kitchen. Tackling her to the floor, he pinned her hands above her head. Hope wriggled and fought but he was stronger. She felt his hands sliding up her thigh and under her shorts. She screamed when his finger found her core, spreading her lips.

"Look at that," he kissed her neck, avoiding a head butt, "you're already wet for me."

"Get off me," she yelled. That's when he shoved two fingers inside her cushiony core. Hope screamed again. This wasn't happening. He was actually going to rape her. "Please Josh," she begged as she began to cry, "don't."

He licked her cheek and her stomach churned. "You know what I heard Hope. I heard your fucking someone else. Imagine how I felt when I heard that. We've been dating for over a year. A whole fucking year and you haven't let my dick sliver between your sexy legs yet. But you meet some fucking douche and just like that you opening your tight ass legs. How would your dad feel if he found out you were fucking his friend huh? You think he'd like Devin going up in his baby girl."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. He was doing this because of the stupid rumors about her and Devin that Kelsey Mays, a jealous twit started because she'd seen them getting takeout last week. "I'm not fucking Devin," she cried. "He was here all the time because he's helping my dad."

"I know your fucking him." He slid his fingers deeper as she attempted to move back. "Someone has popped your cherry Hope. Plus, I see the way he looks at you and the way you look at him. You think I'm a fool." He looked down at her breast, "it doesn't matter. I've invested too much time in you for you to tell me no." He lightly bit at her tits.

Hope brought her knees up to slam in his balls but he blocked it. To block her assault he had to loosen his grip on her hands so she was able to struggle free. Pushing him back, she scooted away, gaining traction and turning to her knees. Standing, she ran for the living room but Josh grabbed her pony tail and pushed her forward. Stumbling, she fell to her knees next to the couch. She tried to make another run for it, but Josh reached out again, pushing her into the wall.

Her head hit the wall hard enough to leave a dent. The pain was dulled by the stars that littered her eyes. He pinned her face and body flat against the wall and grinded his hard cock on her ass. Josh took a fist full of her hair and pulled her head slightly back. "All this foreplay has me so fucking hard." The tasted of her own blood in her mouth set alarms off in her head and the grip he had on her hair was so tight she knew she was going to be losing patches of hair. He forced her shorts down, exposing her ass, "God...your ass is so perfect." She could hear him wrestling with his shorts. He was trying to free his cock. "Did he fuck you good Hope?"

Her mind was fogging over. Bile rose in her throat when she felt the head of his cock graze over her ass. She screamed so loud her throat burned. A loud crashing noise from behind her caused her to jump with fright. Seconds later her head slammed hard against the wall then everything went black.

Red and blue police strobe lights glared illuminated the usually quiet, excitement free block. Devin lay face down on the lawn with three of his fellow officers restraining him. He yelled threats at the fucker he wanted so desperately to get his hands on again but no matter how hard he struggled he wasn't getting free.

The cop holding his legs he didn't know personally, but he was a heavy SOB. Officer Belk, who had his knee in his back, was yelling at him, telling him to calm down. And Officer Maxwell was cuffing one of his wrists but all he could think of is getting loose so he could kill.

"Calm the fuck down," he heard Maxwell yell. "Can't you see you're making it worse for her?"

Devin turned his head to see Hope looking out of the large picture window at him. Her eyes red, tears were falling down her cheeks and the bruise on her head was coloring in. His heart beat faster when he saw the haunted, fearful look in her eyes. He cursed, stopped struggling, and lowered his head.

If he hadn't been worried about Mike and made a detour before going home that fucking tool could have raped and possibly killed her. When he was walking up the walkway to her house he heard her screaming. He'd thought that Mike had gone crazy. That his friend was---shit he didn't know what he thought but he'd busted the door open to find Hope pinned to the wall and that fuck...God, what if he hadn't gotten there in time.

"Devin," Belk said, "You good man?"

"Yeah, I'm cool." The three officers took his word for it and hoisted him up into a seated position on the grass. He lowered his head until he heard the fucker across from him groan. Devin looked up; the EMT's finally got the asshole stable enough for transport. Great...now he could beat Josh's ass within an inch of his life again, he couldn't wait. He watched as the EMT's placed the jerk on a stretcher and put him in an ambulance.

Several officers, some he knew some he didn't, came over and spoke to him. He didn't know what they were saying but some patted him on his back. His fucking senses were shot to shit, all fired up at the same time. He knew the feeling, knew it well. It was the way he felt when he stabbed his father to death all those years ago.

Officer Belk was leaning in front of him now. He tried to focus on what the guy was saying to him. "Devin...you hearing me man?" He nodded. "You worked that asshole over pretty good man. Captain's gonna have your ass for this one but at least you didn't have on your uniform. Look," he sighed, "we haven't been able to locate Mike or her aunt Pattie so you have to get your shit together because she's refusing to go to the hospital. They checked her out and physically she's...well she's clinically fine but someone needs to stay with her."

Devin shook his head, "Alright."

Belk motioned to the cuffs and Maxwell went to one knee and unlocked them then helped him to his feet. The crowd had dwindled to only a few neighbors now. The splintered door replaced with an old one that Mike had in the garage. Devin rubbed his shoulder as he talked to several of his fellow officers about what was going to happen next, for him and Josh. He was going to get his ass chewed off for almost killing the fuck, probably suspended, but no one thought it will go further than that. Not that he cared. He would risk anything for Hope.

When things settled outside, Devin went inside to find her. He waited for over an hour before going to Hope's room. He found her on the middle of her bed, showered and cleaned sitting Indian style and crying. Devin wasn't the comforter type but seeing Hope like this was jump start for his instincts. He sat on the edge of her bed, sideways, wondering if he should touch her.

After several tense minutes passed she sniff and spoke. "Did you talk to my dad?" He shook his head. She looked sadder as if that were possible. "I thought you were going to kill him."

"I wanted too." He watched her wipe her tears with the clump of tissue balled in her fist. "Can I ask what happened? I thought you and he were an item."

She sniffed. "I talked to Josh earlier today. He asked if he could come over. I told him I wasn't in a good mood and that I would see him tomorrow. So when he showed up here a few hours later, I told him the same thing. He seemed to accept it but asked to use the bathroom. We've dated for almost a year so I wasn't worried." She sniffed and wiped her nose again. "When he didn't come out after awhile I went to find him.

"He was in my room. When I asked him to leave he grabbed my arm. He said that he heard I was dating," she looked up at him. Her hazel eyes glistened with fresh tears. "He thought you and I were having sex. He knew I was a virgin and he could tell that when he put his fingers," she sucked in air, "that I wasn't a virgin anymore. He was angry, said that I teased him for a year. He was going to force me." She began to cry again.

Devin moved closer and opened his arms. Hope leaned into him and settled on his chest. He was going to kill Josh as soon as he was released from the hospital. When she stopped crying, she didn't move and he wasn't going to make her. It was the first time in years that he touched Hope, let alone have her plastered to his chest.

"I'm getting your shirt all snotty," she said, but didn't move.

Devin lifted his chin from her head. "It's just a shirt," he continued to caress her bare arm with his fingers.

She lifted her weight off of him. "Are they going to let him leave the hospital tonight?" He saw fear in her eyes and it pissed him off.

"No," he said confidently, "He won't be leaving anytime soon but I plan on staying with you until Mike gets home anyway."

Hope began to cry again. "He hates me too," she moaned. She pulled completely away from him, turned on the bed the lay back with her back to him.

"Mike doesn't hate you Hope. He's just struggling right now. Once he deals, things will be fine." Devin scooted back against the headboard. Some of her hair slid down the pillow and rested next to his leg. He lifted a few strands to see how it felt. He couldn't remember ever touching anything so soft.

Hope sniffed several times. "You know what I did then."

Devin let her hair fall from his fingers. He winced, "Yeah...I know"

Chapter Eight

Devin knew she fucked her dad. What must he think of her? Why did she care? She buried her face in her pillow. "And you don't hate me," she asked?

She heard him take a deep breath. "I could never hate you," he told her.

Relief washed through her only she didn't really understand why. She turned her entire body around, so that she was facing him. He was looking down at her. His eyes, a clear green, weren't watching her with judgment. They were watching her with affection.