Heart Strings Ch. 02

Now that we were touching the link was at its strongest. I couldn't hear the words, the link wasn't quite that clear, but I could feel her mind. She was worried, really worried although I couldn't quite make out what she was worried about. OK, so we were both concerned about the possible repercussions from being discovered by Mbeke but it was more than that, something much more serious. Because I was concerned for her, concerned about how I might have hurt her by my thoughtlessness, I tried to find out what it was but every time I got close I was pushed away.

But worry, although the dominant emotion in her head, wasn't the only one. I could tell that she wanted me, that she needed me and that it wasn't just sex that she wanted. She wanted me to cuddle her, to comfort her and, of course, I was delighted to oblige. However, she seemed scared to let me come back to her flat, as if, somehow, whatever it was that was bothering her, would be worse if we were there.

"You can spend the night with me, if you want," I said gently.

She didn't reply directly but I could feel the warmth of her response wash through me. She was really grateful that I wanted her to stay. This seemed crazy to me; I ought to be the grateful one, grateful that she wanted me.

"If you're staying the night we need to get you some stuff. You'll need a toothbrush and some clean undies at least. Why don't we stop by Tescos on the way and we'll pick up what you need?"

She agreed so, after a visit to the local hypermarket, we made our way to my flat. I wish I had known this would happen because the place was a bit of a mess but there was nothing I could do about it. Once we arrived I showed Sandra where the TV was and how to use the remote while I whipped round the flat picking up and went into the kitchen to sort us out something to eat. It wasn't going to be much, just a couple of grilled chops, but Sandra just wanted a quiet evening in with just the two of us.

All the while I was cooking I could feel her unease and, when I served it up, the poor girl was so uptight she couldn't eat more than a couple of mouthfuls. I knew what she wanted, I could feel what she wanted, but it would have to wait until I had cleared away and we had the evening to ourselves.

"Please, Sandra," I said when I finally sat down, "why don't you tell me what's wrong?"

"I... I can't."

"Are you worried about what I did in the office? Please, let me take the blame for that one. If Mbeke makes a complaint I'll say it was all me, that you were trying to stop me."

"It's a little more complicated than that," Sandra continued. "There's something I have to tell you, something about.... ugh... ugh..."

I could feel the constriction in her throat, as if someone were strangling her. Unable to breathe, she fell forward, off the sofa, and onto the floor. I dashed to hold her but I know nothing about first aid and hadn't got a clue what to do. She couldn't breathe, she was going dizzy, she was passing out when, with a great gasp, she could breathe again.

"Sandra! Sandra! Are you OK? What happened, what happened to you?"

"I can't tell you. Please, Julie, I really can't tell you."

This time I got the message. It wasn't just reluctance, she really couldn't tell me without risking another choking attack. She started to cry, real heartbroken sobbing and I could feel that the pain within her was unbearable. I cradled her in my arms as she calmed down and, as I did so, I felt this great protective wave wash over me. Never before had I felt so needed. I bent forward and gently kissed her forehead and she leaned her head back so that we could kiss lips to lips.

It was just the tenderest of touches, the mere brushing of lip against lip but that was all that we needed and, slowly but surely, it started to sooth away her fears. Here, cuddled together on my living room floor, it felt so right, so complete, so safe that whatever it was that was hurting Sandra was no longer a problem. Gently I kissed away the salty taste of her tears before drawing back and looking deep, deep into her hazel eyes.

'Keep me safe, just for tonight,' I heard her unspoken plea as clear as day.

'How could I do otherwise,' I thought back at her but somehow this seemed to upset her again. 'Come, come to bed, let me take care of you,' I added.

Touching each other as much as possible we got to our feet and made our way to my bedroom. I eased her gently back onto the bed and lay down beside her. Slowly, with kisses like the fluttering of butterfly wings, I caressed her face with my lips. When I could go no further I pushed her cardigan aside until I could. Then, when that was not enough, I started to unbutton her blouse. She looked, she felt, so vulnerable that I just wanted to make her feel the love that was pouring out of me. I wanted to show with my body what I felt with my soul. I wished I could just magic away our clothes so every inch of me could touch every inch of her but had to compromise with being as gentle as possible, easing the clothes from her one by one.

'Your turn,' I thought at her once I had got her naked and, with trembling fingers, she reached for my blouse. Our eyes met and she gave me a little nervous smile. This was no longer the confident woman who had taken the lead in our previous trysts, but a delicate girl, reaching out for comfort. I helped her slip my blouse off, over my shoulders and felt her reach for the clasp of my bra.

'Your breasts, they're so beautiful,' she thought as my bra swung free.

'Not too scrawny?'

'No, perfect.' And, as if to prove her point, she reached up to kiss my nipples. Thousands of delicious tingles ran through my body but I wanted more. I eased her back down again and, by moving my body in a slow circular motion, brushed my nipples against hers. Now we could both feel the tingles and feeling the shared sensations of her tingles and mine was heavenly.

She reached for the waistband of my trousers and started to push them down. I was torn, I wanted to reach the freedom of total nudity but I didn't want to move away from her. In the end, with a certain amount of wriggling and a great deal of giggling, we worked together to push them down and off the bed and onto the floor. Then we entwined our legs and just enjoyed the feeling as body met body.

Wrapped in each others arms, wrapped in each others bodies, it felt safe and warm and, to an extent, we could just have stayed there forever. Sandra had her legs wrapped around my right thigh and, with the slow and steady rhythm of our breathing, her groin was pushing gently against my leg. Almost perversely we were holding back, savouring the slow build up, squeezing, both figuratively and literally, every morsel of sensation from the moment. Sandra had her head over my shoulder and the nearest thing to my mouth was her ear so I gave it a nibble and, feeling how good that was, gave it another. This made Sandra groan with pleasure, the first actual sound either of us had made for a while. I bit a little harder and, in response, Sandra pushed her groin harder against my thigh.

'Do you like that?' I asked with my thoughts.

'You know I do, I know you can feel it too,' came back the reply.

'How about this?' I gently raked my nails down her back. Simultaneous ribbons of electricity ran from our spines to our groins so I did it again, a little harder this time.

"Oh, yes," Sandra sighed as we both crested a mini wave, "it feels so good with you."

'It's good for me too,' I responded, 'better than it's ever been.'

And it was. Never, ever, in my life before had I understood so clearly why it's called 'making love'. Oh, I'd fucked plenty of times before. I'd been a sexually active woman for the thick end of a decade and thought I'd seen it all; slow fucks, quick fucks, good fucks and bad fucks but never, ever, had I felt this physical and emotional closeness where two truly did become one. The link, and all the control that went with it, may be a curse and a damnation from which I wished to be free but this closeness made everything worth while. The distinction between me and her was gone; together our bodies mingled and shared, each enhancing the other. Effortlessly we flowed together so that her pleasure, her joy, her ecstasy, were truly mine as well.

The climax, when it came, was Zen like. Every nerve, every fibre, of our conjoined bodies singing out in joyful harmony as, together, we seemed to float away on billowing clouds carrying us to heaven. I was vaguely aware of a muttering sound until I realised it was me saying 'I love you, I love you, I love you' over and over and over again like a mantra. I had never before felt so complete, so replete. And then, soft as falling feathers, it was ending. Together we spiralled down to become two exhausted but very happy women in bed.

"That was..." I started.

'Shhh! Don't talk, please, don't talk.'

So we didn't. Instead we just lay there, conjoined in every possible way.