Heavy Pockets

Well, it was by design. I mean shoot!

Who knows that you put too much weight into your pockets on purpose? Come on if you saw someone struggling with a large package and their shorts started to slide down their legs, would you rush to their aide? Of course not! Would you stand there mesmerized and think to your self; "Oh my god! That poor son-of-a bitch!" And laugh to yourself not wanting anyone to see you, much less that poor sucker who is trying but failing to keep them up!

Honestly are you really going to turn away?

"Whoops!" might just come flying out of your mouth just before you shut up and let it happen as you take it all in. Can't take your eyes off it can you? Should you look around to see if you're alone while this guy struggles to gain his balance and a monocle of decency here in public? Are you going to miss anything?

There, he got 'em up! He freed a hand and quickly grabbed the waist band and brought them up, saving his face and continuing on in the parking ... WHOA! that tug-up didn't work at all! The shorts fell faster this time than as the former position was sneaking past decency!

HOLY CRAP! if you were behind him you saw his entire ass! If you were in front you saw more hip on a stranger than you've seen in years! I mean NAKID HIP! He doesn't have underwear on!! Good Night!

Well hell, you don't ALWAYS have underwear on either, but this guy IS at the grocery store parking lot!!

Maybe you shouldn't look after all.

Oh, that poor guy!

Has he got them now? Ok. A quick glance. Just a fast casual glance. Just ... HO!!

That, that, that, guy just lost it all!! Those shorts just past the point of no return! OH WOW!

Shit! Now he's got his dick caught OUTSIDE his shorts and his pants really pulled way up on his right side. HA! His dick won't cooperate! it stays outside as he unwraps his shorts. That bobbing dick that was waving hello at you is now looking for someone else to wave at, never having being 'put away' while the shorts head south again through the assistance of gravity.

Jesus! You can't imagine what you would do in a situation like this. Put the giant heavy bag of dog-food down, and repair the unfaithful shorts? Or never let go of the shorts and hang on while the giant bags slides out of your grasp and breaks open in the parking lot?

Are you getting all of this? Is there anyone who can help him? No, No, Not you!

You can't find the where-with-all to go help some stranger while his pants are down his legs and his dick is flapping about! Well hell, it might just flap against your arm!! "Give me strength!" But you have no intention of assisting this guy. Oh no, let him struggle!

OK, you feel bad about your reservations but you will watch him all the way to his car! Is that his car? IS he there? Oh good, he's safe! Gees! Poor guy! What a day!!

Oh hell! As he let's go with one hand, hopping to get his keys, the dark shorts slide ALL THE WAY DOWN! CRASHING, Flat on to the ground. The guy is standing there with this huge bag of probably, dog food, no pants visible to the world, and no keys within reach so he can throw the oversized bag into the locked car! No, he has to set this heavy bag on the ground carefully so as not to split it open from the extreme weight of food inside.

"How does he do this?" you ask yourself. How would I do this?

Oh No! He squats! slowly setting the multi-wall bag upon the ground meanwhile unintentionally spreading his ass cheeks wide open, knees apart balls hanging there for all the lot to see, swaying loose with every jerky move the bag makes as it leaves his grasp and falls the last foot or so on to his feet and ankles.

You are witnessing all this , and you don't believe your eyes as he attempts to kick his right foot free from the weight of the bag. Success! No! No!! His leg freed from the bag's weight but also freed from the shorts completely! arms flaying with no assistance nearby he falls right to his ass away from the car and onto the HOT HOT black asphalt parking lot! His left foot is still pinned and tangled by the shorts and the extremely well anchored dog food. His ass is suddenly on fire! His hands go behind him to raise his burning ass off the black-top. Now his hands must be burning. He has to do this quickly! All his limbs are moving at once! He is intent on freeing himself from the pain and the bag now has a hold of HIM. Tugging away from that horrible bag he's finally loose and somehow standing! But his shorts are UNDER that bag and he's publicly exposed to the world!

You? You're looking quickly around the area to see if anyone else is privy to this exhibition. Never in your years have you seen anything so unfortunate, and so comically real as this. It seems as though it is only you, the sole whiteness to the show before you.

He's now kicking the bag! Trying to get his shorts back! "Nice butt!" you're thinking, embarrassing yourself as you catch the words escaping your mouth watching him cursing his purchase.

Well, he isn't looking for viewers or assistance. you figure, you can wait just a few moments while he remains naked to the world. But really nobody is looking at him! Life goes on. He may well be thinking he got away with all this as he hops about on one leg in the slanted area of the parking lot. You figure, yea, he's gonna fall again. Oh, this is bad! His wanger is just a- flopping around while he tries to fit his second leg into his unfaithful shorts. You don't want to forget this! Set your mind to "implant" as he snakes his freed leg through and pulls up these troubled shorts. Giving them a quick yank and fussing a bit to untangle them, he grabs at their sides and pulls! What is the problem!? He still is showing his ass! And right at you! Is he doing this on purpose? OHHHhh his shorts twisted and in his haste he has jabbed his right leg in and through from the bottom of his shorts! The twist will not allow him to reach any semblance of decency out here. Now he's looking around! "Oh Now!" you think to yourself. "What are you possibly thinking you can do but take off your shorts, right here in the parking lot?" Then you say: "Oh I have GOT to watch this!"

"What would I do?" you say out loud. "I'd get into the car! The hell with the bag of dog food!"

Does he? Oh no! He's taking off his shorts! Not just one leg! Both legs! Oh no! Now people are starting to stop and take notice. Well, is it a guy standing where he might not be seen? No he's standing behind his car where his bag of purchase is, in the driving area, taking his pants off! More than one customer has stopped to ask him what the hell he's doin'? You can hear them! "Hey! HEY Fella!" One customer has his phone out and is filming the guy untangling his shorts with what has to be the most embarrassing moment of his life, while the onlookers totaling up to five to seven people, are coming and leaving that grocery store's parking lot!

"OK folks the show is over. Thanks for your attendance, I'll be here all week" That poor guy! You don't have a clue what must be going through his mind! Unless of course the first two sentences of this story registered.