Home Ch. 03

"Go away," she said curtly.

"No. Peyton we need to talk."

"I have nothing to say to you." she said coldly. She tried to walk past him, but Nate blocked her path.

"Well, I have something to say to you. Please, Peyton."

She looked up into his distraught eyes and couldn't help but feel him tug on her heart strings. "I want the truth this time."

Nate put his right hand on over his heart and lifted three fingers with his left. "Scout's honor."

Peyton didn't show amusement, though deep down she thought it was cute.

"I guess I should start from the very beginning," Nate took a deep breath. "I met Addison two years ago. It wasn't love at first site. More like... lust at first site. I intended to have her as a one night stand, but she had me. I used to find her so engrossing that I committed to being with her blindly."

Peyton's frown deepened.

"She had a way with words," he continued to defend himself. "She was able to twist things to make them go her way, which I then thought was cool, but I now see was manipulator. She played me like a pro and I fell for it hook, line, and sinker. So, a little over a year later, she told me she was pregnant. It was one the happiest moments of my life."

Peyton noticed Nate's demeanor get darker as he spoke.

"I'd always wanted kids. I was an only child growing up so I wanted a big family to fill the void. And I thought Addison was going to give me that. I was ready to start my life with her; with my son." Nate reached into his pocket, pulled out a slip of paper and handed it to Peyton. She took suspiciously, but gasped when she looked inside: it was an ultra sound.

"Twelve weeks," Nate continued with dismay. "I was going to name him James, after my father. I never loved anything in my life like I loved that kid. I was scared to death of being a bad father, but I wanted to be a father all the same. But Addison took that opportunity away from me. She aborted my son without even a word to me." Nate's voice was constrained.

He stared down at the ground, trying to dull the pain reawaken in his chest. Peyton stared at him grievously. She wanted to hold him so badly, but refrained.

"And you know what the fucked up part of it all was?"

Peyton shook her head.

"She convinced me to forgive her. I can't even remember how but she convinced me that it was for the best. I knew better but I was so distressed then I couldn't stand being alone. Weeks later I 'lost' my credit cards. I called the bank and they froze them for me. They told me someone had it taken it and was living it up at some Plaza hotel. I went there to confront thieves, but I found Addison and her OBGYN instead. I broke up with her without telling her what I had found out because I knew she'd twist it somehow."

Nate finally looked back up at Peyton. Her eyes had softened totally and he thought that she was about to cry. He stepped closer to her.

"Peyton, I didn't tell you about knowing Addison because I was ashamed. I was ashamed about my weakness and the mistakes that I'd made. You thought so highly of me and I didn't want you to see the real sucker that I am. It's not an excuse though. It's just how it was."

Peyton took a moment to mull over all that she'd heard. She sat down on the steps, and Nate sat next to her.

"Nate, we are more alike than I thought we were."

Nate was completely taken back by her response. "How so?"

"Because we both have experience the worst in people; any kindness we showed was taken advantage of, yours by Addison and mine by my step-sister. That doesn't make you weak at all. You got away from Addison before she ruined your entire life. I didn't. I sat blindly while Vicky took my whole life away from me. If anything, you're much stronger than you think."

"Peyton, that wasn't your fault."

"And your son's death wasn't yours."

"I'm going to try and trust you on that."

"Ditto."

Peyton grabbed his hand and entwined her fingers with his. Nate smiled down at her. She returned it.

"Nate," Peyton said seriously, "If I'm going to forgive you, you're going to have to promise never to lie to me. Even the worst of all truths outweighs the sweetest of lies. "

Nate arched his brow at her. "Something your dad said?"

Peyton giggled. "You know it."

"I promise you Peyton, No more lies." He squeezed her hand. Peyton smiled bright at him. Nate felt overwhelmed with happiness. He leaned down and pressed his forehead against hers.

"I missed you," he whispered.

She clutched his hand tighter.

"I missed you, too."