How Do I Atone

I broke his embrace, turned and gave him a peck on the cheek. That's when it dawned on me that I was completely naked with a big blue rubber cock sticking out of my pussy. I instinctively tried to cover my nakedness and especially the silicone penis pointing proudly from my pussy!

Mark smiled at me, with a twinkle in his eye that had lured me to the backseat of his car so many years ago and said in a whisper, "Mmmmm, what have we here?"

He then dropped to his knees, pulling my hands away and began examining the feeldoe. He gripped it and I felt the base bulb shift slightly in my slippery pussy. He pulled slightly and the base of the dildo gently rubbed on my clit, sending tingles through my loins.

"Very interesting," he said, as he opened his mouth and slid the entire shaft, completely down his throat.

I was mesmerized as he held it there, his top lip and nose resting against my smoothly waxed mons venus. It seemed like five minutes! Then he grabbed my ass cheeks and pushed it even deeper, if that was even possible, crushing his face against my belly for just a quick second. Still in awe, I watched as inch after inch of the thick blue shaft emerged from his lips.

Of course I couldn't feel a thing but my pussy was throbbing on the bulbous base deep in my sex.

"Wow, Brad is in for a treat tonight," I whispered in his, ear as I pulled him up and away from my rubber phallus. "Now STOP or we will never get upstairs!"

"Is he tied up and ready to go?"

"Oh shit, I haven't got that far yet. We took longer than I thought."

"Well you better get your big blue cock up there and truss him up. I'm sure he won't resist when he sees what you are up to."

So, upstairs I went.

Brad's eyes twinkled as he smiled, eyeing my penis bobbing around as I walked in. Each bounce sent a little vibration across my clit. When I reached the bed, I playfully jumped on it, straddled his chest and slapped my penis across his face. He chuckled, as he grabbed it and lewdly tounged the head, asking, "What do you have in mind?"

"Shut your mouth Bitch," I snapped, slapping him again with my penis.

"Yes ma'am," he obediently replied. We'd played this game before and he knew his role well.

I grabbed his drink and the back of his head, saying, "Down the hatch bitch," as I poured half the tumbler into his mouth.

I fixed him another Dalmore and set it on the table. I then went to the foot of the bed, grabbed his ankles and jerked them to the foot of the bed. He didn't struggle, just cockily grabbed his scotch and brought it to his lips.

"FREEZE," I commanded. He instantly obeyed. He's such a timid whimp when I'm wearing the 'balls!'

I took the drink and replaced it on the nightstand, resuming the knot tying I'd been practicing. Mark had given me a link to a neat Domination site, so I was using some new knots that were faster and more secure than my old square knots.

Once Brad was tied up, spread eagle on the bed, I took his drink and put a straw in it so he could drink easier while on his back. "Suck," I said. The level decreased slightly.

"More Bitch," I snapped and gave his nipple a sharp pinch with my fingernails. He flinched but sucked down half the tumbler. "Well done, you're pretty good at sucking and swallowing, Mr. SLUT!"

"Yes ma'am," I'm the best", he replied.

"We'll see," I shot back. "Now for your blindfold. You don't deserve to see my beautiful cock. All you get to do tonight is feel. GOT IT BITCH?"

"Yes ma'am," he responded.

I put the blindfold on and noticed his cock was getting a little harder, so I dribbled some apple oil on it one drop at a time. Then, I rubbed it around his crotch, coating his balls and his quicly engorging member.

"Now for the new twist. You can't see, you can't touch and you won't be able to hear me moan," I said, slipping the headphones over his ears.

"Mmmmm, the Doors," he murmured.

I quickly smacked his erect penis, lifted one headphone and whispered in his ear, "Shut the fuck up you little Bitch."

You won't touch, you won't see and you won't speak. Understood?"

He nodded.

Satisfied with my work, I went downstairs to get dinner AND Mark ready.

Mark was standing in the kitchen, still fully clothed. Again, I felt naked but I also felt a little trepidation about what would come next.

We'd talked about this and Mark said he'd go home the first time I asked. No pressure, no cajoling, no whining about me being a tease by building up his hopes. He knew this was a big step for me.

We'd also agreed, no kissing. Sounds silly but that's just for Brad and me. Everything else in my mind was just sexual stimulation. No love, no emotion, just plain sexual pleasure. We'd also agreed we'd not do anything alone. Everything was to be shared with Brad. This part was gonna be tricky, like when Mark dropped to his knees and took my 'cock' in his mouth. Brad wasn't there but I rationalized it by thinking that wasn't me, it wasn't 'MY COCK', right?

Now another tricky part was coming. We'd agreed to oil each other with Brads favorite apple oil. I rationalized it by thinking it was just like going to the gynecologist. It was purely a clinical procedure, a prep procedure, required to get ready for Brad.

Remember, I keep telling myself, this is all for Brad.

Not easy when my pussy is telling me, 'Dee, don't kid yourself, I'm dripping down here. You're getting off on this more than Brad. He won't even be able to see a fucking thing. He won't be able to touch ANYTHING. You even took his hearing away.'

"Shut your mouth," I commanded my pussy, as I took a deep breath, walked toward Mark and reached for his belt buckle. When I slipped my hands under his waistband and dropped his pants around his ankles, his freed cock sprang forward and bumped mine. The tip of his penis came to rest against my belly. I looked down and could see he was leaking precum and it was being smeared all over my smooth pubic mound. God, this was going to be hard! I've never let a single drop of cum go to waste. Never.

First time for everything, I thought to myself, as I pulled away and got Marks docksiders off. Next came his shirt.

Yep, just like I thought, he's waxed all over, as I run my hands over his smooth athletic chest. Ooops, I think, as I jerk back.

"How bought we finish getting dinner ready," I ask.

We were both completely naked and sporting large erections (yes Mark's was as big as I remember). His cock was almost an exact replica of the feeldoe, without the weird blue color. About eight or nine inches and perfectly formed. It looked perfect. I wanted and wanted it now!

Sorry, back to dinner. Mark had an iced tray of fresh oysters on the halfshell he'd picked up. I got the brie, crackers, and cavier spread out on another tray. We both got a glass of wine.

Now for the final step I'd neen worrying about. I took the apple oil bottle and dribbled drops all across Mark's shoulders and chest, then began rubbing it over his smooth hairless chest, shoulders, flat hard stomach. Boy, did it feel different than Brad's hairy covered chest. I was really getting into his warm, slick and muscular physique.

Too much so, I tell myself harshly.

I quickly I turn my attention to his broad back, squirting plenty of oil into my hands. I clinically rub it in and finally get to his tight hard buns. As I kneed the oil in and open his cheeks, I'm fascinated by how smooth his hairless anus is. Brad's is hairy and never attracted me. Yes, I loved fingering it and plowing our toys into it...but this was different! It is so smooth. I felt it calling to me, 'Dee, Dee, Dee,' each time I massaged the oil into this silky puckered eye, staring me in the face, unblinking.

Soft and hard at the same time, no wonder Brad liked analingus so much. I involuntarily moved my mouth closer, stuck out my tounge and probbed his puckered sphincter muscles. Ahhh, the HEAT! The firm yet pliable strength of those smooth burning muscles. I nudge the tip of my tounge deeper.

OMG!! The tip of my tounge trembles as I feel the striated bands of his muscles twitching in respose to every vibration of my trembling tounge! Deeper I tentatively explore. His striated bands quiver, dancing a ballet with my tounge. This is sooo damn intoxicating and erotic. The heat, the throbbing pulsations on my sensitive tounge, the intimacy, even the taste and smell are overwhelming enjoyable and intimate. I FUCKING LOVE THIS I realize as I drill deeper!!

"Hey," Mark said, saving me from breaking my own groud rules, "Brad is waiting. This is all about him, right?"

Silence, as I coutinue my exploration.

"Dee, am I right!"

I hear his raised voice...

'Hell no', my gushing pussy sez. 'Go for it! This is about you too! Brad asked for it. You deserve to enjoy yourself. Go on, keep fucking his smooth ass with your tounge, Brad will never know'.

'Fuck you', I say to my pussy devil, who is tempting me to break my self-imposed rules.

"Dee? Earth calling Dee!"

I'm jolted back to reality. I gently pull my tounge out and watch fascinated as your quivering hole slowly closes, a glistening gossamer string of my saliva, the only connection remaining with that sweet, divine and savory hole!

"Thank you Mark, I was getting selfish back there. You prepared your ass so nicely, it's so fucking hot!"

"Mmmmm, I wish Brad would wax like that!"

"Ask him, I'm sure he would if you promised to give him a licking like that. You were very good. An expert the first time," he added.

Maybe I will, I thought, storing that in the back of my mind.

Up the stairs we climb, each with a tray and a glass of wine. Even though Brad had headphones on, we'd agreed to no talking. Mark had explained his heightened senses might detect another person.

The one not playing, would stand perfectly still and watch.

Mark was the first to go. He brought the scotch straw to Brads lips. It was funny to watch Brad jump as if startled. Evidently he had no clue anyone had come into the room, yet alone, two people, both sporting large cocks.

Brad sucked the scotch eagerly through the straw he believed I was holding.

Mark took the, scotch, placed it on the bedstand and turned his attention to Brads cock, which had gone soft while we were downstairs. On his knees, next to Brad, he leaned over and took the flacid cock in his mouth. I watched fascinated as Brad's cock began to swell in another man's mouth. Mark began slowly taking it deeper.

As it began to get bigger, I admired Mark's skill at fellatio. With no hands, he was able to get Brad fully erect. When he swallowed his cock to the hilt, I gasped. Then ever so slowly, he let it emerge from deep down his throat.

Brad moaned and said, "Baby, that was incredible, you've been practicing!"

Mark and I discussed this. Mark instantly pulled his mouth off and smacked Brad's cock, a little too hard, I thought.

Brad winced in pain, saying "Fuck babe, that hurt!"

Mark smacked it again, even harder. I winced! Brad clenched at the ropes, his muscles rippling, as he desperately tried to break the bonds and cover his totally vulnerable manhood. My mind felt Mark overdid the punishment BUT...my dripping crotch and Brad's raging hard on told a different story.

Mark got off the bed and took his place beside me and I proceeded to Brad, lifted his earphone and whispered menacingly, "QUIET BITCH, no talking."

Then I gave his nipple a good pinch and he successfully suppressed a little yelp.

I lifted the headphone and wispered, "You've been bad, so dinner is going to be served without utensils. Open wide."

I got off the bed and took a cracker, laid a wedge of brie on it and took a small dollop of cavier, then knelt on the bed again. Brad was still laying there with his mouth open, so I shoved in the cracker. As Brad was chewing it, I spread the caviar on the tip of my bright blue penis, letting it touch his lips. He opened and in went my dick, smeared in caviar. He gulped it in and licked off all the caviar. I glanced at Mark and he was smiling, watching intently.

I put brie slices on Brad's nipples and spread another spoon of caviar roe on his penis, enjoying a nice snack for myself.

Next, I fed Brad several crackers with brie. I finished by holding an iced oyster shell to his lips and slowly tilted it up until the juices and meat slid into his waiting mouth. This method of serving the oysters would pale in comparison to what Mark had devised.

As I got up, I motioned to Mark that it was his turn and pointed at the oysters. He walked up beside me smiling. I could tell he was excited. I could actually see the veins in his penis pulsing. My pussy was also tingling in anticipation.

Mark took an oyster and straddled Brad's face, facing toward his feet. With one hand he pulled his balls and penis up toward his belly. Evidently he didn't want them to accidentally droop on Brads chin while he fed him his first oyster.

My pussy was dripping and I was pulling on my feeldoe so it hit my g-spot and rubbed against my clit. I was about to watch my husband lick another man's bung. Mark wedged the oyster deeply between his cheeks and lowered away on Brad's hungry mouth. OMG, it was so hot. Brad's tounge reached out and found the small morsel. It guickly disappeared and Mark sat down further, spreading his ass cheeks.

Here I was, watching my husband ream my Mark's asshole, just like he does mine. Just like I'd done downstairs! It was two feet from my face and SO EROTIC! I was frigging myself like crazy and poor Brad had no clue. As Mark pulled his ass away, I could seem Mark's anus clamp shut, squeezing some of Brad's saliva out.

Wow, that was hot!!

I motioned Mark over and had him bend at the waist. As I forced my tounge up Mark's warm, slick rosebud, I felt a freight train chugging in my loins. I almost swooned, as Mark's sphincter relaxed and my tounge slid into his smooth, hot glory hole.

I came and came and came, feeling his bodu respond to my frantic exploration!

'Dammit, this wasn't supposed to be about me', I screamed to myself.

'Yes it is,' said my little pussy devil. 'You're loving this and knew you wouldn't be able to keep your hands off Mark.

'Fuck off,' I screamed at my own personal devil.

Then I remembered Brad.

I was still shaking from the orgasm but I managed to get to my feet. I fed him some scotch with the straw and shaky hands, then stumbled to the foot of the bed, intent on making it up to Brad.

I bent over and took his swollen, thick, cock in my mouth. I deep throated it, all the way to his balls and just held still, willing myself not, to gag. One, two, three seconds. I could feel his heartbeat deep in my throat. Incredible!

As I slowly let each inch slip from my lips, I felt hands spread my ass.

'Dammit, leave me alone, this is about Brad, let me concentrate,' my mind screamed!

'Bullshit,' my little devil laughed. 'This IS about you, how could it not be? You've got Brad laying there, oblivious to the orgasms you're having. Clueless about the wild sex that's happening right next to him. He's ALWAYS said he would LOVE to give you the pleasure of two men and here you are enjoying it, his cock in your mouth, Mark's tounge drilling your butt, while you screw yourself with the feeldoe. What a self-centered lover you are!!'

'NO, NO NO,' I scream in my mind!!

But I know the devil is right! Deeper and deeper I take your turgid, throbbing rod, trying to gain atonement for my selfishness. I hold and count in time with the tounge deeply drilling my ass.

I need to get to ten to gain forgiveness...seven, eight and then I gag, involuntarily squeezing Mark's tounge deep from my anus.

FUCK, I've got to get to ten!

I frantically deep throat Brad's cock. There is no longer a beat in my ass to count with. I pull off his cock wondering where Mark's talented tounge is, then I feel a hot bulbous pressure insistently pressing on my hungry sphincter.

Relax and DO NOT clench you teeth for gods sake, I tell myself as the head slips in.

Ahh, I sigh as Mark slowly...inch by precious inch...slides between my hot fleshy mounds. Slobber leaks down your cock, as my head bobs up and down. He's getting a rhythm now, so I try for forgiveness again.

Down I go, my nose nestled in your pubic hair...four...five...six, gag!

DAMN! Mark is a machine, and my ass and pussy are involuntarily twitching in miny orgasmic spasms. Down I go again, I feel you swelling. Fuck, this has to be it, I think.

Seven...eight...almost there. I feel you swell even bigger against the back of my throat.

Another pump deep in my ass, that's nine! Only one more!

Mark pulls almost all the way out and pauses. Almost like he knows I'm punishing myself.

SHIT! I NEED TO BREATH! PLEASE, PLEASE!!

Mark thrusts in slowly but firmly and I feel him swelling. Your head is splitting the back of my throat.

I SEE STARS, MY KNEES GO WEAK AND MY LOINS EXPLODE? Mark's strong hands keep me from collapsing as I feel your hot load fill my mouth. His cock is pulsing deep in my ass as you fill my mouth with load after load.

Then the stars overwhelm me and I slip to the floor in a benumbed sort of comatose stupor.

-PENANCE FOR SUCCUMBING TO MARS-

I come to and find myself at the foot of the bed, dribbles of cum on my cheek, like a used street whore.

I wipe it with my finger and lick it off. Still fresh, I think to myself.

This is confirmed as I hear the front door shut and shortly later, a car start and drive away.

OMG, I reach behind and feel my ass. My finger comes back sticky and it smells like cum. I taste it, wondering if it will taste like Brad's. I can't tell the difference.

'Slut, slut, slut,' keeps pounding in my head with each heartbeat. Fuck I'm going crazy!

I start quietly sobbing and then I hear you struggling against your bonds.

What do I do? You trust me and I've screwed another lover and you have no clue. We never got to the part where I share Mark's cock between our lips. You have no clue. I never got to bring you into the game.

I MUST TELL YOU!

Why did I ever look at those fucking pictures. I'm from Venus, not Mars like you. It's all your fault!

'You looked because you are a sex-craved nympho,' my little devil laughs in my head.

'You LOVED IT, YOU SLUT,' he screams in my head.

I sob even harder as I pick myself off the carpet. I walk to the head of the bed and slug back the full glass of scotch.

Then I sob even harder when I realized I fixed it for you. I REALLY AM A SELFISH SLUT! FUCK, FUCK, FUCK.

I look down at your wonderful, loving, giving body and have no clue what to do. You squirm your hips, wondering where I am. I make up my mind and reach for your leg bindings and loosen you from my cruel bonds. I wipe my eyes and begin loosening your hands. As soon as they are loose, you shed the headphones and blindfold, reaching for me. As I collapse in your loving embrace, you ask, "Why are you crying?"

"Because I love you so much," I coo my FIRST LIE into your warm, soft, hairy chest.

You chuckle, as you reach between my legs, grab my feeldoe and say, "I know you do. Very few women would walk around with one of these in, for a couple of hours. And I can tell you've been practicing your deep throat techniques. You are so giving, always thinking of me in everything you do."

"That's me, the faithful, loving navy wife," I lie again, searching his eyes. All I see is love and admiration for everything he thinks I've done to make this day special for him. How I HATE MYSELF!

"I'm really sorry for those pictures in the e-mails I sent. I just get so horny for you. I create these fantacies that I think would make you feel pleasures that I can't give you alone. You understand I could never do them for real, unless you wanted them, right?"

"Of course honey," I reply, add almost as an afterthought..."What if I told I sucked another cock or watched a guy lick another dudes ass?"