How to Visit a Parlour

Well, here we are again. This time around, I will be concentrating on the 'massage parlours' and escort agencies that you can find in practically any city. My own experience of this area of the sex industry is rather limited, but I will try to cobble things together as best I can.

I assume that you have read my previous essay, and so will know how to act around escorts, how to make a booking etc. so I will gloss over all of that this time.

We'll deal with the parlours first:

The terms 'massage parlour' and 'parlour' are virtually interchangeable, and are treated so in this essay. Although, bearing this in mind, there are a large number of massage parlours out there that are just that: places to get a massage. Don't just turn up and expect a hot sex session: do your research.

First of all, beware! Any premises where more than one escort conducts business is legally a brothel, and is technically illegal. Police usually turn a blind eye to a great many of these premises, so don't worry too much about being busted. As long as the escort that you employ is not forced to have sex with you, you will be fine.

Incidentally, if you do suspect that the escort in question IS being forced, call Crime Stoppers on: 0800 555 111. It is now possible to do so without revealing your own identity, and it could save someone from slavery.

If this seems an overly negative way to begin, it is not intended to be so. A great many parlours offer security and freedom to the escorts that work there, and should be applauded for doing so. The opening paragraph was intended as a serious warning against those few profiteers who use parlours as a front for human trafficking.

For those of you out there that want to employ a male escort, the parlour is probably not the best place to do it. Parlours are businesses after all, and they want to bring in the punters. The most time-honoured fashion of doing this is to fill the place with sexy women, young and old. There are a few places that offer men as well as women, but only a few, If you want a man, go to an independent.

All of the standard etiquette from my other essay applies just as much here; it would be wise to read it before proceeding with any sort of punt. It's all good advice, and it's free.

A parlour has more than a couple of advantages over visiting independent escorts: firstly, it is entirely possible to turn up at a parlour with no notice and ask to see an escort. One will either be available immediately, or be available after a short wait. Secondly, parlours usually have specially equipped rooms. These rooms can include a sauna, Jacuzzi, dungeon, mirrored wall room, sometimes a room with a camera that allows to have a memento of your exploits. Thirdly, there are usually a large selection of extremely beautiful escorts.

Parlours are strictly incall, you meet with the escort on the premises. Under no circumstances will an escort travel out to meet you. It is part of the security that a parlour can offer to know that help is only a shout away. Even it is not needed.

There are considerable drawbacks, however. As the parlour is run as a business, you risk being in a 'conveyor belt', whereby you are simply booted out of the door as fast as possible. This is simply a risk that you will have to take.

The second big risk is the chance of the parlour being a front for prostitution and human trafficking. A rather haphazard way of avoiding this is to avoid anything advertising 'Eastern European', 'Asian' or 'Arabic'. Again, there are a large number of genuine British citizens who work in parlours who fit these categories, but as I said, it is a haphazard way of avoiding it.

Yet another risk you take is with the security in place at the parlours. Each of them, quite properly, has very strict rules about what you do with the escorts. Break even one of these rules, even unintentionally, and you stand to lose your fee at least. These offences can include something as simple as kissing on the lips (although any escort worth their salt, will simply stop you and say that they do not kiss on the lips, or better still, will have made this perfectly obvious before the session began).

One thing that is true of all parlours is their inflexibility concerning time. Your pay for an hour, and you get an hour. No more.

The answer to finding a parlour where you are at a lower risk of experiencing these drawbacks is simple: do your research. This is something that I strongly advocated in my first guide, and it is something that I advocate now. This is not a simple choice, and should not be treated lightly. Go and find out about the place that you are going to visit. Almost all of the cities have an online community, often with representatives from the major parlours in that city. It would be a good idea to find them.

The sequence of events is only a little like visiting an independent. It would be wise to check out any website and ring ahead before your visit. If you like the look of a particular escort from the website, you must arrive at the parlour while they are working, remember that you may well not be able to see the escort even if you arrive in the right time period. It is very much first come, first serve. (No pun intended).

Upon arrival, you will be welcomed, perhaps charged a membership fee (usually refundable if you do not choose an escort) and led into a room where the escorts not currently working will be waiting for clients to arrive. You may select an escort with whom you want to spend your time, and then the two (or even three if you are feeling adventurous) of you can disappear off to the room you have chosen for the liaison. I'll assume here that you have read my previous guide, so follow the rules set out there and you will do fine.

Another area of difference between the independents and the parlours is the manner of payment. All parlours have a different payment system, so it is impossible to give a representative system here. Some places accept credit cards, some only cash, some you hand the cash to the girls, in others you hand it in at the front desk. Once again, do your research, and you will be fine.

Whilst my own experience of parlours is very limited, and this guide is mostly cobbled together from second-hand sources, I hope that it has been useful to those of you who genuinely want to do this, and not been too off-putting to those of you who are on the fence about the whole matter.

Now, lets deal with agencies. Agencies are generally not physical places like parlours (although some may direct you to incalls with escorts in their own houses) but offer the same support to the escorts as parlours. However, agencies specialise in sending escorts to hotels or homes. They also specialise in helping a prospective punter to make a selection; taking possibly vague descriptions, and choosing the correct escort for the occasion. Higher class agency escorts are usually available for an entire evening's date, with a guaranteed happy ending. I have absolutely no experience of agencies, but they are almost universally loved by the escorts and clients that use them, so they must be doing something right. Once again, (and I can't emphasise this one enough) DO YOUR RESEARCH!