I Am Not What You Think I Am

"I never told them that I was. I never asked for this reputation, and I certainly never wanted it, I just never denied it, that's all. I don't even know how it all started."

"But to tell them that you had never fucked a cheerleader, that you had other priorities, dude, you destroyed everything that they held dear to them. The top priorities as far as they're concerned is football and fucking, not necessarily in that order. And to rub salt into their wounds, you announce that you have a fiancé. Now they think that the girls will not let them fuck without a commitment. You have destroyed all that they have held dear, their tradition."

"I'm sure that it will not be that bad."

"Maybe, maybe not. But for now you need protection that they won't give you, so I can't let you on the field."

I rang my mother. "Hi Mom, is it all right if I call in and see you on the weekend?"

"Aren't you playing football this weekend?"

"No Mom, I've been dropped from the team."

"Why, you were playing so well."

"I'll explain when I see you. Oh, is it all right if I bring someone with me, I want you to meet her, Mom, I'm in love."

"Is this why you're not in the team? Is it because of her, or is it that crazy lady that came here a week or so ago?"

"Sort of. Look, I can't explain it over the phone, I'll tell you all about it when I, we, see you."

As it turned out explanations were not necessary, or more difficult, depending on how you looked at it, social media took care of that. One of the cheerleaders, who had told her world that I was the best lover that she had ever had, took to Facebook with a long, and colorful, rant about how I had betrayed her by telling lies about not having made love to her. She was joined by a chorus of fellow cheerleaders with similar complaints. After the first flush of 'likes' the tide began to turn with 'dislikes' catching up, and eventually overtaking the 'likes'. The new thread to the Facebook dialog was that the originator was a mindless bimbo, whose whole popularity was based on her having had glorious sex with me, which in itself was a lie. I was being praised for standing up and proclaiming my monogamy to the world.

A local journalist took up the story. 'Facebook Feud on Campus' screamed the headline.

'State U student and football hero, Kris Pendelbury, who has long held the reputation of having had sex with every cheerleader, and many other girls on campus, has shocked the student world by 'coming out', not as a gay, but as a serial monogamist. He has claimed that he has made love to only one girl this past year, his fiancé Angelique le Maître, a Canadian fellow student.'

'Several cheerleaders have reacted angrily to his revelation that he had NOT had sex with them, and have taken to social media to vent their anger. This would appear to have back-fired on them, with opinion now heavily favoring Kris and his stand.'

The next thing I knew was that I was a wanted man. I had just walked into my room from studying in the library with Angelique. "Kris, phone call for you, you had better take it, this is the twentieth time he's called." Todd said as he picked up my phone from the charger.

"Hello."

"Kris, Kris Pendelbury?"

"Yes."

"Hi, my name is Byron Kellogg, I'm the producer for 'Newsday' on Channel 21. You have kicked over a hornet's nest on campus, and we would like you to appear on camera for a live interview tonight."

"I don't think that would be a good idea."

"My colleagues and I disagree. For years university jocks have had a reputation, more for their off-field activities than on-field exploits. You however, are something of an anachronism, a student, on a football scholarship, who plays football brilliantly, but whose main priority are his studies. We find that a very newsworthy story, and one that we and the University, feel should be promoted."

"I will do it on one condition."

"Name it."

"That Angelique is there with me. While I had this reputation long before I met her, she is the reason that I felt that I had to go public with my revelations."

"She would be your fiancé?"

"Yes."

"Okay, we'll send a limo for you. We need both of you here by five, to run through the format and to get you through make-up for the six thirty slot."

I wished that I didn't have to ring her dorm, but there was no way that I could get to her in time. "Hi, it's Kris, could I speak with Angelique please?"

"Angelique," the voice on the other end called out. "It's HIM, it must be important."

"Hi, what is it?"

"We, that's if it's okay with you, are going to be on TV tonight."

"What?"

"I have been contacted by the local station, and they want us on 'Newsday' tonight. They wanted me but I told them that I wouldn't do it without you, because of your importance to me. I hope that I haven't put you on the spot, I used you as a way of seeing how desperate they were to have my story."

"I don't know. What if I make a fool of myself?"

"You won't. If anyone is going to make a fool of himself, it'll be me. They're sending a limo for us at four forty-five."

We arrived at the studio just on five, to be met by Byron Kellogg. "It's great to meet you Kris, and Angelique." His look at us was guided by his appraisal of our audience appeal, that vague assessment of how the viewing audience would perceive us. "If you'll follow me, I'll introduce you to Sophie Weston, our anchor, and she'll run through the questions that she would like to ask you, If there are any questions that she should avoid, now would be the time to mention that." He knocked on a door and stood aside for us to enter. "Sophie, this is Kris and Angelique."

"It's great of you to come, sit." She pointed to a sofa. "Now we don't have a lot of time, there's make-up and the lighting technicians and sound engineers want a run through to get everything right. So," she handed us a clipboard of questions, "We'll run through these, if there are any that you don't want asked, let me know now, okay?"

We scanned through the list until I came to a question about my relationship with Professor Lawrence. "I don't want this one asked, in fact I don't want any questions about Professor Lawrence." I told her, pointing to the question on the page. "While I have nothing to hide, the matter having been dealt with by the University, any mention of this may be damaging to her."

"But you aren't the only person in this sorry saga who has a reputation."

"That may be true, I don't know about any reputation that she might have. But that is between you and her, I want no part in this muckraking. If you ask this question, I, we will be out of there, is that understood?"

"Yes, scrub that question. What about the others?"

"Some of them are a little tender, but I can cope with them."

"What about you Angelique, are there any that you wish to avoid?"

"Questions about our sex life are really a private matter between us."

"But, I understood that this has already been made public."

"The generalities yes, but the specifics, no. Are questions on specifics that important?"

"Define specifics?"

"The number of times that we have made love, three if you're interested, is okay. That we took precautions, that's fine, but the mechanics of it is off-limits. Questions like, did we have oral or anal sex, what positions did we do it in, those questions pander to the prurient interests of a very small demographic, and are not all that newsworthy."

She looked across at her Director who obviously knew what 'prurient interests' and 'demographics' meant. He drew his finger across his throat and she crossed those questions from the list.

We were taken to make-up where we were painted and preened in preparation for the show. Next we had to sit on set while the lighting technicians took readings of our faces and shifted lights and adjusted intensities to achieve the best results. The sound engineer had us say a few words to check the mike levels and everything was ready for our big show.

We sat on set. The camera was focused on Sophie while the lights that were trained on us were switched off. The intro phased through and we could see the Floor Manager standing beside the center camera counting down with his fingers. When he ran out of fingers he pointed to Sophie. "Good evening, hi," she looked straight at the camera, her best angle. "Tonight we have a State U student who has created something of a controversy on campus, by revealing to his fellow students, that he wasn't the womanizing jock that they all thought that he was, but that he was a serial monogamist. Tonight he has agreed to come on camera to explain what the brouhaha is all about. With him is, he says, the reason that he saw fit to make his revelations, his fiancé. I am referring to Kris Pendelbury and Angelique le Maître." She held her hand out towards us as the lights came up. "Let me begin with you Kris, you are attending University on a football scholarship, is this correct?"

"Yes, that is correct."

"But, our investigations have revealed that your GPA, when you applied to the university, was good enough for you to gain admission without having to apply for this scholarship, can you explain?"

"Yes, my grades were good enough. But my family situation was such that we could not afford tuition. The University had already sounded me out for a football scholarship based on my high school record, so it seemed that this was the only way that I would get there."

"You mentioned your family situation, can you enlighten us?"

"It's no secret that my father took his own life, he had been suffering from depression for some time, after the company that he worked for was declared bankrupt."

"That would be Enron, wouldn't it?" She asked, just to re-enforce that they had done their research.

"Yes. He lost everything in that crash, including the money that had been set aside for tuition for myself and my brother and sister. All of his earnings were tied up in share options, and our house and possessions were purchased on loans that were based on the share value of those options. When the share prices dropped through the floor, wiping off all of their value, we were left with nothing. Our house was repossessed and sold, we got nothing from that sale. We had to sell much of our furniture and possessions when we down-sized into our current home."

"Your mother lives in a trailer park, is that true?"

"Yes, and I guess that makes me 'trailer trash', doesn't it?"

"You said that, not me. We have investigated your academic record, and find it hard to believe that you have consistently scored above average in all of your subjects. That is a little inconsistent with your reputation that, up until very recently, you enjoyed."

"I never enjoyed that reputation. I allowed it to continue because it was easier that way. That was until I met Angelique. She had heard all of the rumors, but didn't believe them. The fact that I spent so much time in the library studying, sort of did it for her, no stud knew that the library even existed, let alone spent any time in one."

"That brings me to you Angelique. What was it about Kris that first attracted you to him?"

"It was the way that he could remain focused on his studying for so long. When I first noticed him he had been pouring through books and writing notes for nearly two hours without a break. And here I was thinking that I was the only student capable of doing that."

"So you went over and introduced yourself to him, is that correct?"

"Not straight away. I observed him for two weeks before I decided that I had to get to know him."

"And how soon after you met did you first have sex?"

"We have never really had sex per se, we have made love, and the first time was about a month after we had met. I had arranged to go home to visit my parents, and I invited Kris to come with me, to meet my folks. He agreed, I think that he was thinking, actually I know that he was thinking, the same as me, that it was the right time to move our relationship up a notch to the next level. My family love him, and Papa gave me his approval, and yes, we made love in my old bed, and it was an experience that we both enjoyed."

"That weekend away wouldn't have been so that he could hide from Professor Lawrence would it?" Angelique and I looked at each other, the decision was unanimous and instantaneous, we stood up, removed out mikes and walked off set. "We've heard rumors about you and Professor Lawrence, why won't you answer my questions?" Sophie yelled after us.

"I will not answer any questions about that topic, I have already spelt that out, and you had agreed not to ask any." I threw back over my shoulder at her.

"I'll get to the bottom of this, you can't hide from the truth." She screamed after us.

"You'll be disappointed with the truth, and you'll get no help from me."

"Cut to commercial!" the Director shouted as he ran after us. "Kris, stop." He panted up to us. "Look, I'm sorry about that. She was told not to ask that question, I don't know what got into her. Come back, and we'll sort this out."

"No. The moment has been lost. How can I be sure that she won't slip that question in again?"

"If she wants to keep her job she won't."

"Not good enough. How can we go back with that question still hanging out there? If we don't answer it the people will assume that I have something to hide. If we try to explain it away it's going to jump up and bite us. The best thing is for us to walk away from this interview now. If in the future you can assure us that there will not be any similar attempts to ask any question pertaining to what is an ongoing investigation and rehabilitation process, then I'll think about it. With a bit of luck It'll be old news by then."

We had to catch a cab back to campus. It dropped Angelique off at her dorm before dropping me at mine. "Wow, you have a habit of causing a stir don't you?" Todd asked as I walked into the room.

I was saved from commenting by the phone ringing. It was Angelique's room-mate, a very frightened Tiffany. "Kris, it's Angelique, Professor Lawrence was waiting for her when she came back from the TV studio. She, Professor Lawrence hit her several times with something, I think it was a baseball bat. We called security as soon as we heard Professor Lawrence yelling at her. They've taken her away, and the ambulance has just arrived to take Angelique to hospital. She's unconscious but breathing, her head looks terrible, Kris, how could she do something like this? What did Angelique do to her?"

"I'm heading for the hospital, but before I go, can you look in her diary, I think you'll find her parents phone number, can you tell me what it is?"

"Sure thing, hang on a second while I have a look." A moment later she had read it out to me. I would call them from the hospital as soon as I knew her condition.

"Hi," I had attracted the attention of a nurse in triage, "Could you tell me how Angelique le Maître is please?"

"Who are you?" She asked.

"I'm her fiancé, Kris Pendelbury."

"I thought I recognized you, you were on TV tonight, weren't you?"

"Yes, for a short while."

"Wait here I'll see how she's getting on." She walked down the corridor and was back in a few minutes. "She has regained consciousness, you can go down, it's the third cubicle on the right."

"Thank you." I walked as quickly as I could. "How is she?" I asked the attending doctor.

"She has just regained consciousness, but is still a little groggy. As soon as she has stabilized a little we'll take her up for a scan to see what damage has been caused. There doesn't seemed to be any skull fractures, if there are they aren't depressed, so the prognosis is good. We'll know more after the scan. Would you like to speak to her? She may not know you, or understand what you say, so don't be too concerned if she doesn't."

I had no reason for concern, as soon as she saw me a small attempt at a smile crossed her puffed and bruised face. She couldn't reach out for me, she tried, because of the intravenous drip hanging out of her arm. I went quickly to her and took her in my arms. "I won't ask you how you are feeling. Darling, I'm sorry this has happened to you. I blame myself. If I hadn't stopped them from sending her to hospital before, this would never have happened." I kissed a spare bit of face. The smile was better this time.

"Snot your fort." She mumbled through swollen lips. "Sirs."

"I love you, and I want you better."

"For you my Darn, I'll ket metter."

"They're waiting for us upstairs, you can wait here if you like." The Doctor announced.

"I need to call her parents and let them know what has happened."

"You do that. She was brought in with nothing that could identify her or her next of kin, although someone did recognize her, so we know who she is now, but until she regained consciousness we had no way of knowing who we needed to contact." A Porter came in with a gurney and she was lifted on to it for the trip upstairs for her scan.

Henri answered the call. "Hi Sir, it's Kris." I got no further.

"It's Angelique isn't it, what has happened and how is she?"

"She's fine now, I think. She was attacked by Professor Lawrence when she got back from the TV studio. She has been hit several times with a baseball bat. The Doctor says that there is no fracture but they're taking precautionary scans as we speak. They'll know more then. She seems okay, a little groggy, but that's to be expected."

"I'm on my way, tell me where you are, I'll be there as soon as I can."

The early morning light was just beginning to filter through the blinds. Angelique had been moved from ER to a room. I was seated at her bedside, her hand in mine, looking at her sleeping face, there seemed to be a half smile on her lips as if she knew that I was there with her. I was tired, but determined not to sleep until she woke and I knew that she would be alright. The sound of hurrying feet preceded the arrival of Henri and Juliette.

"How is she?" They both asked at the same time.

"She seems to be fine, she's sleeping, the medication that they've given her knocked her out."

"What exactly happened? What was she doing at the TV studio?"

"The media somehow heard about me telling the world that I wasn't the super jock who had done the whole cheerleading squad plus some, and that Angelique and I were an item, actually more than an item, we were engaged. The local TV station wanted to interview us on camera and we, I suppose we were naive enough to think that if we told them that we wouldn't answer questions about Professor Lawrence, that they wouldn't ask them. When they did, we walked. Professor Lawrence was waiting for Angelique when she got back to her dorm, and took to her with a baseball bat."

"What is being done about this Professor Lawrence?"

"I don't know, and I haven't bothered to ask, I had other priorities." I said looking towards Angelique.

"Yeah, I suppose you did. I'll go and make a few calls and see what I can find out."

Angelique began to show signs of waking, her eyes fluttered open for a few seconds before closing again, her hand tightened in mine and a smile split her face. "How are you feeling?" I asked her.

"Would you melieve that I felt metter?"

"Yes I would." Any further discussion was halted by the arrival of a doctor and nurse. They busied themselves checking her vital signs and taking a close look at her injuries.

"She is one very lucky young lady, any harder and some of those hits would have been fatal."

"How long will she have to stay here?" I asked.

"Another day or two, we need to be certain that there will be no complications." He looked at me. "Look, why don't you go home and get some sleep, you look like shit."

"I must admit to feeling a little second hand."

"You go Kris, I'll stay here with Henri. We'll call you when she's fully awake.'