I Love My Daughter

I thought about that as we got closer to the house.

She interrupted my thoughts and said, "Thanks for the swim lesson, Daddy."

"Sure baby, I hope it helped a little."

"Oh it did, I was so nervous when we first started, it helped that you held me up like you did. By the end it was easy."

"You did great." I made dinner and we sat together at the table to eat. Carrie was across from me and we spoke about going back to that pond for the first time since her mother had died. It felt sad to talk like we did, but it also seemed important too. I was aware that Carrie's voice and mannerisms were even more quiet and nervous than usual. She was retreating even deeper into that vulnerable place. Hearing her voice falter broke my heart. Right then I was swallowed up in a feeling of helplessness. I simply didn't know what I could do to help my daughter.

We cleaned up the kitchen together, and then we sat on the couch and watched a little TV. I fell asleep for a little while and when I woke up Carrie was right next to me. She was watching the local news. The weatherman was warning of strong storms tonight.

I glanced over at her and I could see little her tense up at hearing the report. She looked at me with fear clearly written across her lovely face. While I tried to appear outwardly confident, inside I was actually quite worried about her reaction. I could sense the tension, and I felt a very real need to make sure she felt safe.

She said she needed to get to sleep. I asked her if she was going to be all right.

I told her, "Now don't you get worried about anything, okay?"

She replied in that meek baby-voice of hers, "Oh Daddy, I don't know, I feel really scared."

I got up off the couch and I gave her a long hug. I could literally feel her trembling, so I held her tightly and whispered in her ear, "I'm always here if you need anything, sweetheart."

"Thanks, Daddy," she responded with a hesitant smile, and then she went into her bedroom.

I took my time getting ready for bed. As I brushed my teeth I thought about how hard Carrie's life had been since her boyfriend Danny had died.

I thought about my suspicion that she and Danny had probably made love together. I was happy for her, because I know he must have been so kind and tender with her. I think it had happened when I was still at work and they were both here after school. I imagined them doing it in her bed. It broke my heart to know he was gone.

I looked at myself in the mirror and thought about how the death of her mother had impacted me. I had never dated anyone since her passing, it was just too difficult for me to even attempt. In a way, Carrie had become my one and only priority, I had been putting her first in my life.

I was dwelling on how lonely I have been. Carrie was 12 when her mother died, and she had just turned 18, that means it had been six years since I had made love to her mother. There hasn't been anyone since.

As I finished brushing my teeth and then I noticed that it was starting to rain outside, and there was a low droning patter on the roof above us. I left the bathroom and went across the hall to check in on Carrie.

I tapped on her door, and she replied softly, "Daddy, it's okay, you can come in."

I opened the door and she was under the covers with the light still on.

I said, "I just wanted to check in, just to see if you were okay."

She looked up at me with those great big blue eyes of hers, and she said, "Well, I'm a little bit nervous."

She just seemed so beautiful, her hair looked neat and tidy pulled back in a tight ponytail. She had showered after we swam together at the pond, and she looked clean and wholesome.

I reassured her, "Don't worry Baby, everything will be fine."

She looked up at me and replied in a shaky voice, "Thank you so much for being so wonderful to me."

"You're welcome, but, I really wish I could help you, even more..."

She smiled nervously and said, "I love you Daddy."

"I love you too Baby, and don't be scared, I'll be right across the hall, okay."

She meekly replied, "Okay..."

With that I closed the door, took two steps across the hall and I walked into my room. I was greeted by the sight of my empty bed.

I thought about Carrie's mother and how much we were in love. Looking at that big bed, I was reminded that I had increased the height of the legs, so the mattress was positioned at the exact same height as my hips; I had bolted on sections of wood to make the whole thing taller. I did this for my wife, because her favorite way to make love was with me next to the bed, and she would be on her back right up next to me. With the bed up higher just a little bit, I could stand on the floor and push myself into her at the exact right position.

I remembered how her breasts would bounce when we would fuck, I would stand next to the bed, and she would hold her legs apart for me. Nothing in the world was more exciting for me than to watch the frantic motion her breasts as I vigorously pumped myself into her.

Well, maybe one thing was more exciting for me.

After she climaxed but I still hadn't, she would beg me to cum on her breasts. She would tell me what she wanted, and she could be kind of loud. It seemed almost every love making session ended with her crying out, "Cum on me, cum on my tits!"

She was so lost in the passion of what we were doing, that I don't think she realized how loud she was being. Carrie was right across the hall, and I was so worried that she could hear her mother begging.

When she cried out like that we both knew what to do, I would climb on top of her and she would eagerly jack me off. I would squirt my cum on her beautiful delicate breasts. Oh my God, it felt so perverted but we both loved it so much. She would just get so excited watching me cum, and it made my heart ache to think about it all these years later.

As I stood there in just a pair of boxers staring at my bed. I stepped in right up close to the side and tried to imagine my wife holding her legs for me at the edge of the mattress as I forcefully pumped in and out of her. I thought about how much she loved it, and how I used to do my very best to satisfy her. Sex was powerful release for my wife; I remember how making love with her could liberate her from so many of her tensions and anxieties.

It was a sad feeling when I finally climbed into bed. I still missed my wife terribly, much more right then than I had in a long time. I listened to the lonely sound of the rain on the roof and I got all lost in the beautiful memories of making love like we used to do. At the same time, I realized that I was worried about Carrie and how helpless she seemed, I wanted so badly to help her. I was desperate to find some way to alleviate her from her fears. It took me a long time to fall asleep.

I'm not sure what time it was, but the house was dark when a loud crash of thunder woke me with a jolt. The storm had clearly rolled in and was unleashing its fury. Rain pelted the windows and wind whipped over the house, causing it to shudder. Only seconds later, I heard a soft voice from my open bedroom door,

"Daddy, are you awake?"

I could just barely make out a small form near the door, and replied towards it, "Yes, baby."

I knew what she was going to say before she uttered another word, so I was not surprised when she meekly asked,

"Is it okay, I mean, can I get in bed with you?"

I sat up and turned the bedside lamp on, and she just looked so vulnerable and nervous. It broke my heart seeing her like that, so I just had to say yes.

I lifted the thin sheet up and patted the open spot next to me and said simply, "Its okay, you'll be safe."

Carrie nervously walked towards me she was wearing an oversized t-shirt and old pair of my boxer shorts. Both of them looked huge on her petite body. She looked so worried as she awkwardly tried to climb up onto the bed alongside me. She is so short that it took her two tries to hop up onto the mattress.

She spoke in that shaky vulnerable voice, "Your bed is so tall compared to mine."

It struck me as odd that she would say that after I had just been thinking about the very personal reason that I raised the height.

I quietly said, "Yes, it's a tall bed."

She sat next to me and it was obvious that she was really tense. "Thank you for letting me come in here like this, I just feel so scared."

"Its okay baby, I understand."

I went to reach for the lamp, to turn it off, but she timidly asked, "Please Daddy, can we keep it on? I mean, like we used to do?"

I whispered, "Of course."

She eased herself under the covers and she set her head on my extra pillow. My sensitive daughter was lying there next to me so stiff and scared and I didn't know how to help her. It seemed so poignant that she would ask to leave the light on. This was exactly what we used to do, when she would sneak into this room to sleep with me and her mother.

Suddenly, there was a faint flash of lighting, and she visibly flinched. I reached over and put my arm around her.

I whispered, "It's all going to be okay."

I pulled her in close to me, and I felt her warm skin against my arm and chest. I was only wearing a pair of boxer shorts on this humid summer evening. We were both aware that the storm was steadily increasing in its intensity. With each flash of light I felt her body stiffen in anticipation of the bang that was sure to follow. When the thunder rolled, she would whimper, just exactly the way I remembered from years before.

I wanted to let her know she was safe, so I held her tight and whispered words of encouragement into her ears. I repeated soft encouragement like, "I've got you baby," over and over again.

Even though I knew she was frightened, it still felt wonderful to have her so close to me. It was really important that I could still play the role of her protector.

For a while the storm seemed like it was way off in the distance and that it might be over soon. But then there was suddenly a bright white flash and Carrie reflexively shivered and squeezed me really tight. I was shocked at the intensity of her reaction.

I held her tight and waited for the thunder. A few seconds later there was a tremendously loud boom and she seemed to spasm against me. She shuddered so violently that it scared me.

I tried to console her, "Shhhh, Carrie. It's going to be all right, I'm right here."

She stammered, "Oh God, Daddy, I'm, really scared."

I was lying flat on my back with one arm around her. She was right up next to me on her side. She was hugging me with one arm across my chest and one leg over the top of my thighs. Her body was shivering like a frightened baby lamb.

"It's okay baby, I've got you."

There was another bright flash. She instantly burrowed her forehead into the nape of my neck and pressed her body tightly against my side, just like she had done during storms as a child. Her entire body was pressed firmly against me and I could feel her trembling as she readied herself for the violent thunder.

All I could do was hold her.

When the thunder boomed it was louder than before, and Carrie flinched against me with fear. I felt so desperate to help her, but all I could do was squeeze her tightly with both arms.

The storm was getting worse. The lightning and its booming thunder were getting closer together. Each flash of lightning was brighter and each explosive clap of thunder was louder. My beautiful baby was trembling and shaking in a way that really worried me.

I tried to reassure her, "Don't worry. Please Baby. Daddy has you, it'll all be okay, I love you, don't worry."

Suddenly there was a Flash-Boom at the very same instant, the noise was incredibly loud and it shook the house. My poor frightened baby sort of sprung upward from the sound.

Her whole body seemed to violently react to what was happening. I grabbed her as tight as I could and pulled her right on top of me. She was squirming in such a terrified way, and all I could do was to try and hold her close against me.

It took all my strength to hold her, she was writhing with panic. She was scared to death, and her whole body would suddenly get stiff with terror, and a few seconds later she would be twisting and quivering as I tried to keep her from squirming away.

She was so anxious, her legs were almost running in place, it felt like she was going to crawl out of the bed one second, and the next she would squeeze me with a kind of manic neediness.

Then there was another bright flash of lightning, and instantly there was an earsplitting explosion of thunder.

I heard a picture fall from my wall and crash on the floor.

My baby screamed in terror, and I tried to hold her even tighter against me. I could feel her arms and legs flailing in panic.

"Daddy, Help me!"

She was writhing with such intensity, that I literally rolled her over onto her back and lay on top of her, trying to calm her frenzied spasms of terror.

I pleaded, "Baby, I've got you, I've got you!"

She was panicking, and she was desperately trying to escape. There was nowhere to run and all I could do was stay on top of her and hold her tight against me.

She was crying out, "Daddy, Help me, Help me!"

Then she was twisting and struggling, and she and I rolled over together, and I was trying to hug her as tight as I possibly could. My baby ended up on top of me, holding me tight with a sort of insane neediness.

"Oh Baby, don't be frightened, you're safe, you're safe with me

I was flat on my back with both arms holding her on top of me, holding her as tight as I could. At this point she was sort of squatting on me, she was on her knees with both her legs were on each side of my hips, her knees desperately squeezing my ribs.

I could feel her heart pounding against my chest.

The next flash of lightning wasn't as bright, and the noise wasn't as loud. But I still felt her body stiffen as I held her.

Her chest was heaving and I could feel her inhale and exhale against me. I wanted to soothe her frantic breathing; I hugged her even tighter in my arms.

I whispered, "It's okay Carrie, it's all going to be fine. Don't be scared, I've got you."

We lay there together and listened to the storm outside, as time went on the power of the lightning and thunder didn't seem as intense, and with each cycle we could tell it was moving away.

I wanted so badly to try to calm her down, "Please Baby. Don't worry, I've got you."

After a long time I could tell that the storm was moving away, but we stayed frozen in that pose, in that tight embrace. I could tell we were past the worst of it. Little by little I felt her begin to relax, and she sort of melted against me.

After a while she kind of nervously stuttered, "Oh God, Daddy that was SO scary!"

I realized she was emotionally exhausted, not just from the storm, but from everything we've experienced together since her both her mother and boyfriend died.

"Oh Baby, I'm here for you, don't worry."

After a while she softly spoke in that nervous voice, "Daddy, thank you for holing me so tight, it really helped."

"Of course, I would never let anything hurt you."

When the intensity of the storm finally waned, the atmosphere in my bedroom changed, the feeling was peaceful and soothing, and there was a smooth droning noise of gently rain from the roof above us.

I kept on holding her against me and, after a long time, I sensed she was slowly drifting to sleep.

Now that the lighting and thunder had ended, I finally allowed myself to relax a little after the emotional intensity of what Carrie had just experienced.

In a timid voice she murmured, "Daddy, I feel so safe with you."

I whispered, "Go to sleep Baby, I'm right her, so don't worry."

She replied in a squeaky whisper, "I love you Daddy."

"Oh Carrie, I love you too."

There was a very real sense of relief that the storm had ended. It was so comforting just to lay there holding my beautiful daughter. I could feel her literally of melt into me. It didn't take long before I could feel that she was falling asleep.

I tried to stay as still as I could so I wouldn't disturb her. From her soft, rhythmic breathing I knew my baby had finally drifted off to sleep, much to my relief. I allowed myself to relax too, but I was still holding her snug against my chest.

Feeling Carrie so close, I realized that I had not been in bed with another warm body next to me since my wife died. Holding her like this made my heart ache with a very real emotional longing. I absolutely loved the warm feeling of being so intimate with my daughter.

My baby was asleep and breathing steadily with her head still resting on my chest. I tried my best to stay as still as possible, not wanting to wake her.

I was still lying flat on my back with both arms holding her on top of me. I wasn't holding her as tightly as I was during the fury of the storm. Instead the embrace was tender and loving; I was entirely focused on trying to make her feel safe and protected.

Now that everything was finally calm, I suddenly realized that I that something was different. I could feel my boxer shorts were pulled down a little, it must have happened while Carrie was squirming so violently during the height of the storm. She must have pushed them down my thigh with her legs, or maybe it happened when I rolled over to protect her.

My immediate reaction was to reach down and pull them back up, but I was afraid any movement might wake her, so I stayed perfectly still. It was a strange feeling, knowing that my boxers were pulled down far enough that my penis was uncovered. It was completely out from under my underwear. It felt a little bit scary to know it was so close to my sleeping daughter, but all I could do was keep still. I couldn't bear to move, I was so scared to wake her.

She had fallen asleep while I was hugging her in this comfortable pose, with her right on top of me; she was sort of positioned on her knees straddling me. Both her legs were on each side of my hips, her knees tight against my ribs. Her chin was snuggled into my shoulder, and my arms were across her back. Her elbows were resting on the bed and at the same time she was gently holding my shoulders.

Now that everything had calmed down, she was sort of resting her big baggy boxer shorts right against my bare stomach. The feeling was so intimate, I mean, her groin was gently pressing right against my stomach, near my belly button, and I was intensely aware that she was really close to my uncovered penis.

She was lying on me so quietly, and after everything she had been through there was no way I was going to move her, even though it seemed a little bit improper that she was against me like this.

I knew that I should reach down and just pull up my underpants, but we fit together so perfectly. It just felt so beautiful.

I loved being so close and I carefully caressed her back and stroked her short hair. Carrie seemed so nervous against me that it felt like I was protecting her. Oh God, I love my baby so much, and it felt beautiful to have her on top of me like this.

With Carrie lying right on top of me, I couldn't help but think of her mother. After we would make love, she would just sort of collapse on me and she would lie on top of me a lot like my daughter was doing right now. I loved being close to my wife like this, and if everything went well we were usually both all wet.

The wetness between us was something that both of loved. Her mother would get unbelievably wet when she was excited and she would actually squirt when she climaxed. She would try to aim it at me. If we were fucking and she was on top, she would make sure to squirt it all over my chest, and sometimes my face. Some of the most amazing memories I have of my wife was when she was gushing all over me.