"I awoke to the sound of guns," he sighed. It was the End of the World from the moment our eyes met; from the moment the Wars began.
A pause fills the room. Silence leaks into my eardrums. I can't breathe.
"Continue, 647." You can hear the rash in his voice. He, the Lawyer, busily fiddles one of his hands through his balding hair; lips biting together, waiting. Another holds a cigarette. The smoke rolls out of his mouth in waves of white. He leans.
I can't breathe.
The defendant trips over his words. He is tugging at his shirt to aid him of the heat. It is smouldering today. As if it even matters. There I see him standing, with a noose around his neck. He, the puppet stands on the stage. I am surrounded by fans, awaiting the finale. He was once mine. For a moment, he was. I am filled with absolute guilt. I have been this way since morning. I feel as if someone is engrossing the insides of my eye sockets, making me tear up in pain. It feels life they've got my stomach in a headlock, and I'm fairly certain that I'll throw up; As if I have swallowed a rock the size of my fist and it hurts when I try to swallow. This is Pain. This is Heartbreak. I think what hurts the worst is looking into his eyes and knowing this is the last time I will see them.
It began when I was awoken in my bed, staring down the barrel of an AK-47. We had heard on the radio earlier in the week that they were evacuating women and children; sending them to Camps in remote locations for safety. Stations everywhere televised "The End of the World" as Idle Viewers watched the bombings of Global landmarks. There were riots. People went missing; children. Entire cities were swallowed in thick clouds of smoke. They had closed down international borders. Churches were destroyed, political leaders were executed.
They burned everything.
I was fairly certain that there was no God. God couldn't exist in a place like this. It was said that people were running and trying to 'escape' the Imperial, but humanity was assured "this isn't the type of thing you can run from." This is when I was taken.
But that was before, the time in which we no longer talk about. The government runs a whole lot differently now. After a large amount of the population went missing and a few radical groups were slaughtered while attempting to annex the new government, the rest of us were taken here. Embarrassingly however, I don't know where here is, or what it used to be before the camp was placed here. I do know that this is not home, nor will it ever be. The parks have been replaced with barbed wire fences surrounding the marriage camps, and the blue skies above are now a putrid mustard in the mornings, and turn crimson and grey by eye. There is a stench from outside that strengthens in the day. It is the smell of death, carcasses. Adorning the front lawn of the Imperial; where the government is centralized, there are pits of bodies, roasting in the ever-intensifying heat. Bodies that have been mutilated and diced like ripe tomatoes. There are women's bodies. These bodies are placed here to remind us that of what we are.
What we are? As good as dead.
Women are considered a commodity. They are a service for the Husbands. There is no equality. Women have black ink smeared across their lips, to signify silence, oppression. This embellishment is mandatory, and speaking is forbidden. If either of these rules are broken, our lips are sewn shut. We all wear plain black dresses with a plain while petticoat underneath. Duties include working in the camps, cooking, cleaning. Sewing, and other such Maternal hobbies. Wives do not have sexual intercourse, either. When the time comes to reproduce, a letter is sent from the Imperial, issuing the need for such, and later we are credited to a suitor.
Sex is taboo now. We are told to believe that The Wars were a gift to us, and that they were meant to give our corrupt perverse society a chance to rebuild. We are told the social norms of society-dirty magazines, adultery, and strips joints-are the ways of the Before. Things are different now. Intercourse is Illegal, and for those who are caught must face the death penalty, man or woman. Most men were executed for Rape in the early days of the Imperial, but we don't see much of that anymore. Any perversity has a certain consequence. Although, the penalties are much worse for women, for we are considered the inferior race. While a man is forbidden to engage in intercourse, he is permitted self-stimulation. If a woman is caught engaging in masturbation, the Criminal is punished with the removal of the clitoris. Most women would never dream of doing such nowadays, especially around a Husband.
I was placed as a wife three years ago, to 621. He was a selfish creature with a greasy ducktail and yellow chipped teeth. His breath reeked of stale saliva and despite his somewhat athletic physique, he was covered in scars and old tattoos from the Before. Tattoos and Body Adornment are also illegal, however many can't completely cover up their past lives from the Before. 621 worked with the Imperial.
All I had wanted in those three years of marriage was someone to touch me, someone to love me. I hated my Husband with an intense passion that boiled in my stomach whenever he was near. He, like the rest of them, was a sexist and chauvinistic animal. I recall one day walking into our bedroom, after finishing up dinner. He was sitting on the bed, smiling at me. His eyes were bloodshot, and his focus shifted in and out. He managed to pat the bed for me to come and sit beside him. He opened his mouth, and told me a joke.
"Hey 388, what do you call a bitch with two black eyes?"
I cringed at the sight of him.
"Well?" a cough escaped him. I sat on the bed, unmoving. Still. Silent.
"NOTHIN! I already told her twice!" His sour chuckle filled the air as I reluctantly forced a smile. His laughter sounded like the sounds of snapping wood, nails on a chalkboard. Sporadic. Simply Ugly.
"C'mon, why ain'cha smiling?"
I sat. Avoiding eye contact.
"Why ain'cha fuckin' smiling, Honey?" A sour chuckle escapes him, once again. I hit the ground. I was beaten that night. This was my relationship with 621, my Husband.
I had met Luke a long time back, Before. We had always been friends, and after he discovered that I was married to 621, we reconnected through simple eye contact and smiles when 621 hosted Government gatherings in our house. However, this time we met as 647 and 388. It was a dark night, the night that Luke came to visit me.
621 was out. I don't know where he was.
Luke had knocked on my door earlier in the day, and said in an awkward tone, "Hi! Is 621 home?" I shook my head, and he smiled and opened the door anyway. I didn't know what he was doing. In a bustle or mid-cleaning, I set my dishwashing gloves down onto the counter, and Luke walked over to me, grabbing me by the waist and bringing my ear close to his lips. He whispered that he would be back later in the evening. The contact alone, being so close to him, made my breath become shorter and faster. I could feel myself swelling beneath my dress. He spoke delicately, and whispered that he hadn't come over to see 621. I can't recall the exact words, but only the heart-racing adrenaline that accompanied them.
The night came. Luke played his facade at the front door once again, entered, closed, and locked the door. The blinds were drawn.
"621 will not be home, he's with the Imperial."
I believed him, but later thought to myself why Luke wasn't with him, because he too was with the Imperial. They worked together. He took my hand and hastily walked me to my bedroom. With my heart beating in my throat, I was gracefully laid atop my bed, and he climbed on top of me. This was forbidden, yet the electricity that burned throughout my body was too much to ignore. I had to continue. I've craved this feeling for years. Luke pulled me in close to his face; I could feel the swelling beneath his pants as he pressed himself close against me. He took my ear to his lips, and said one word that terrified me. He whispered, "speak." I shivered with fear, unknowing of what to do. "I want to hear your voice, Anne."
His voice was so soothing. I hadn't heard my name in years. The impact made me want to cry. "Anne, please," he said to me. My lips parted, the black paint cracked as I opened my mouth.
"I love you,"
The words echoed inside my own head. I was in love with Luke. Not for the way he had treated me since metting as 647 and 388. And, I didn't love him for the way he treated me in the Before. I felt utterly free from my surroundings. I was encased in a state of ecstasy because of Luke. At that time, I loved him. It was then he grasped my head with his hand and our lips touched for the first time. I felt a surge of energy fill me. I wanted more. Like bored and horny teenagers from the Before, we ripped off each other's clothes clumsily while maintaining contact. Kissing was forbidden. All of this was. It was so exciting. The next thing either of us knew, we were naked. Our bodies rubbed together under the pale covers of my Husband's bed. I took my hand and slid it down his profile, studying the feeling of his chest and his ribs. I then took hold of his throbbing member. He groaned with pleasure as I took him in my hand, gently caressing the head of him and sliding down his shaft. I could feel him pulsate with pleasure and throb the more I touched him. Within seconds of this he flipped me over onto my back and whispered into my ear, "I want to do everything to you." He then told me to put my arms above my head, which I did. Luke then kissed me, everywhere. He began with my ear, and slid down my neck. He kissed the small of my back, and I was shivering with anticipation. I could feel myself becoming wetter as he did this. My body ached for him inside me. He kissed gently down my body until he was kissing my clit. He looked up at me playfully and I then brought myself to my knees as he twirled his tongue around my clit.
Just then, he stopped.
I turned my head, and flipped over onto my front, thinking something was wrong I asked him,
"What?" I was confused.
"What do you want me to do to you?" He whispered back, kissing the top of me playfully.
"I want you to lick me, deep," I said to him, dripping with the anticipation of feeling his tongue inside of me. He obliged and suddenly then I felt his warm tongue licking me and circling my center. He licked back and forth between my hole and clit, almost bringing me over the edge. After a minute he came up to my face, "Your pussy tastes delicious," and licked his lips. I felt like he was staring through me, and all I had wanted at that moment, more than anything, was for him to be inside me. He was between my legs, and I grabbed hold of his hips, forcing him to thrust into me. It was electrifying. Both of our bodies moved as one, thrusting in and out. My breasts bounced up and down while he pounded me with his hard cock. The juices from my pussy dripped down his shaft as he fucked me. Between the moans of pleasure I scratched his back with my fingernails. It felt too good. We could both feel the pleasure increasing as our bodies began to tense up. With each of us panting hard, Luke pounded me faster and faster until both of our bodies seized up in an intense climax. I bit into his neck, trying not to scream.
On top of me, Luck closed his eyes and we felt ourselves slipping into sleep shortly afterwards.
That was when we heard the guns.
I was saved by Luke. They entered the room and we were both seized. We were arrested and taken immediately to the Imperial. Luke had 'confessed' the incident. The streams of blood dripping from the cuts on his back, the bites on his neck, and the ripped clothing had saved me. Though if I could, I would have taken it all back. Just to see him alive.
"I raped her. I knew the law, and I knew it was wrong. Some part of me felt I needed it, and now I have not only betrayed the Code, but I have shamed myself as a human being. After raping her, I had fallen asleep on her chest. Out of fear, she did not move or try to wake me, and screaming would only convict her. When, when I awoke to the sound of guns..I-I, I love you Anne."
He broke down in tears. They kicked the chair out from under him.
I was fairly certain there is no God.
Now, I know for sure.