Imperfect Ch. 06

I opened my mouth to yell, and he spit again, right into my mouth. This set him off, twitching and cumming inside of me. And I found myself coming as well. This was the first time in my life I had experienced a mutual orgasm and I apparently had to be gang raped by numerous men, spit on and abused in order for it to happen.

When he had finished with me, someone helped me sit up and gave me a drink of something. Then everything faded to gray. When I woke up, I was alone in my dorm room. My torn clothes were nowhere to be found. I could feel that the message being sent, even though I was still covered in sticky filth was, "this never happened." I took a shower and put on my pajamas and went to sleep. IN the morning it would all seem like a dream.

As harrowing as all that sounded, those where memories I cherished. I unlocked some of my deepest sexual urges that night and started a process of coming to face what some might call the dark side of my sexuality. But for me, I embrace is because I believe that sexuality is who we are and that we should accept ourselves and love ourselves. Shame and repression only lead to actions that damage ourselves and others. So while it's sometimes scary to face my own turn-ons when they seem so twisted, I know deep down that it's healthy and good.

Better that than to be one of those religious crusaders who are so consumed with what they perceive as filth that they let it take over there life, spending all there time scouring the planet for 'decency violations' and obviously getting some perverse thrill out of the process.

Yes, better me as I am, accepting myself for me- than that.

I collected my college memorabilia and went to pay for it all. I didn't even haggle. Glen was satisfied with his purpose so we called it a day and went to get a late lunch. There was a nice little sandwich shop nearby so we went in and got a seat by the window so we could see the people walking past, going about there business. As you might have guessed by now, I'm something of a people watcher. I think most artists are. Many times we feel more comfortable observing than actually joining in.

Glen leaned in over his fries and said in a stage whisper, "I met someone!"

"You did? When? Tell me about it!" I exclaimed, knowing that he would weather I wanted him to or not. But on the other hand, yeah I wanted the scoop."

"Well, I'm not really that interested in him," he said suddenly sounding disinterested. I knew something was up. He had my attention.

"Why's that?" I asked, trying to sound as nonchalant as he had.

"Well, he's a cop. He pulled me over the other day and when he asked me to step out of the vehicle, he complimented my buns."

"So you don't like him because he's a cop? I thought you liked men in uniform," I said with a teasing smile. "I didn't know we had any gay cops here though- were you out of town?"

"That's the thing, he's not out."

"O-oh." I said, finally understanding. Glen refuses to get involved with men who are in public denial over there sexuality. I can't say that I blame him. Who wants to hide their relationship from the world?

"Well, you know how I feel about that. I just won't. Absolutely not. No way. Ever." He was resolute. Firm. I would say, a little too resolute. "He was kinda cute though," he added softly, almost wistfully.

"OK, so that's the end of that then, right?"

"Actually, no. He's been calling me. He really wants to see me. I told him my policy but he won't give up."

"Don't do it Glen," I warned. "You'll only get hurt."

"Don't you think I know that?" he replied defensively. "Of course I'm not going to do it. I don't need that drama. I just thought you'd be happy for me that he wants me so bad. That's all. I mean, you completely missed the point I was trying to make."

I gave him a steady look. "Glen."

"What?" he droned, putting his hand under his chin and looking away from me.

Despite what Glen may have said, he was a total drama queen. He didn't lie when he said he didn't need the drama, but I knew him well enough to realize the truth. He craved it. Weather healthy or unhealthy, if there was drama to be had, you could bet that Glen would want a part in it. Preferably the staring roll.

"You're not fooling me," I told him. Then I turned my attention to my hamburger to let him off the hook some. In the end, it really wasn't going to matter how much I warned him or what I said. Glen was going to do what Glen was going to do. My job would be to stand by, try to warn him but not too much, and be there to help him pick out the pieces afterwards without saying 'I told you so.'

"I'm not going to get involved with him. He asked me to meet him for coffee. But I said no."

"Good for you Glen. Stick to your guns." I did my best to sound- I mean to be supportive. That meant pretending that I believed him.

"He sure was cute though." Glen swished a thick crinkle-cut french-fry back and forth in his ketchup. I knew it was time to change the subject.

"Well, at least you found a great coffee table," I said in a chipper tone. This gave me plenty of time to concentrate on my lunch while Glen expounded on art, antiques, design, furniture manufacturing , and interior decorating. It was interesting, I just didn't have anything to add, which was just as well, because there was no way that Glen was going to let me get a word in edgewise. So I just chewed and nodded.

When I had finished my lunch and Glen had finished his speech, I saw that he had barely touched his fries and hadn't even taken a bite of his burger. "I guess I wasn't as hungry as I thought," he said lightly, waving our waiter over. "Could you wrap this up for me? I'm just going to take it home."

The waiter nodded and took the food back to package up. "So Miss Thing," Glen said leaning forward again, conspiratorially. "Tell me about your love life. Did you score with that bartender or what?"

"Aren't we getting a little personal?" I blushed.

"Haa! You did! Your dirty little thing. So, are you seeing him again or is he yesterday's gossip?"

"Actually, he wants to take me to dinner. Even though, as my darling mother would say, he's already gotten the free milk."

Just then, the waiter appeared with Glen's food. "Let's go then, you can tell me all about it in the car," Glen said, heading to the cashier.