Intrigued Ch. 07

She looked at the clinic in the rear view mirror, she couldn't go through with it. It disappeared in the distance. She felt like she was going to be sick. She pulled the rental car to the side of the road... she was too embarrassed of her destination to have a cab drive her there. She pushed her blonde hair out of her face as the tears started to began to fall. This was unplanned in every form of the word but she was the only one that had to deal with it. It was then that she made the decision: if he wasn't going to be happy with her, he wouldn't be happy at all.

-Keegan-

Whenever I woke up in the mornings, I had no expectations of seeing Raven until a little after dusk. When I had no expectations, I didn't feel as bad when I woke up alone. It had already been over a month and I had gotten used to my new schedule: I would wake up in the mornings long enough to eat something and work on Aspen Emery. I would shower and fall asleep on the couch watching a random T.V. show. I would usually sleep until after dusk when Raven would be coming through the door on my balcony, fangs extended, and prepared to feed. I couldn't say this new schedule disagreed with me... it wasn't as if I used to have sun kissed skin and now I was deathly pale. I always had pale skin and I feel just as good now as I would if I always lead this sort of lifestyle.

Some nights, we wouldn't go anywhere. We would just stay in bed and explore each other's bodies until she was forced by near sunrise to leave me again. Others, on nights she was particularly hungry, I would accompany her on a hunt. I would watch as she singled out a person in the crowd by listening to his thoughts. I never saw her kill a woman. The first time I watched her feed, it scared the hell out of me. It reminded me how fragile my life was to her as I watched her take the life of someone twice my size as if it required no effort. Regardless of what kind of night it would be, she would always come to me first and that's the way I liked it.

There were still a few hours until Raven would come and I was getting antsy. I woke up a lot earlier than I planned and had already done my usual duties... the wait for her to get here was going to be excruciating. While I ate and watched 300 on HBO, my cell began to vibrate. It was Jenna. I braced myself for the absolute ass-chewing I was about to be subjected to. I haven't been to The Riff in almost over a month and I was sure she was taking it personal. I answered the phone:

"Hello?" I said into the phone, wincing.

"Hi, Stranger... Long time, no talk," she said. It almost sounded as if she were smiling.

"Yeah... I know... been busy you know? How have you been?" I said trying to figure out exactly what she wanted.

"Pregnant," she replied rather casually.

My heart jumped into my throat and my throat went painfully dry. I felt like I was going to fucking die. "Wha-? How di-? Is it-?" I began so many sentences but I couldn't bring myself to finish any of them. After awhile, I managed to get one word out: "Pregnant?"

"Yes, Keegan, pregnant and before you ask: yes, it's your's. I took a pregnancy test last week and it was positive. I went this morning to get an abortion but I couldn't go through with it. I figured that I would call you up one more time to see if you wanted to reconsider our relationship with each other... for the sake of our child," she said softly, traces of hope laced in her voice.

I knew firsthand what it was like to be without a father and it fucking sucked ... I also knew how bad it could turn out for the kid if I only halfway cared for its mother, like my father only halfway cared for my mother. I saw what Jenna was trying to do and it made sense. but I was not going to be my father.

"Jenna... if you ever need anything for the baby, anything at all I'll always be here, but I'm not going to reconsider our relationship. I would be lying to both of us and it would be unfair to you for me to lead you on only to leave you later like my dad did my mom. I'm sorry I got you into this but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to make it right and be a good father," I said, feeling the words flow out of me without any difficulty.

"Fine, Keegan. Have it your way," she said just before she hung up on me.

Regardless of her pissy attitude, I was borderline elated from the news I received. I had always wanted kids and I was sure that Aspen and I would have a houseful. Obviously, that didn't go like I planned. I wondered what my kid was gonna look like, who's eyes it'd have and whatnot. I was deeply in baby bliss when Raven walked into my living room.

"Hey, Beautiful," I said as I walked over and wrapped her into a tight hug.

"Hello... is there something you want to tell me?" she said, though I was 100% sure she had already heard it in my thoughts.

"Jenna's pregnant," I said, scared to see what her reaction would be like.

"Do you want me to kill her?" she said blandly.

I opened and closed my mouth, unable to register what she had asked me. Here I am: fucking enthused that I'm gonna be a dad, and my girlfriend asks me if I want her to kill the woman that's incubating my seed. "What? No! Raven, I do not want you to kill Jenna!" I said in a tone that was low and serious, so she knew that I wasn't kidding. She nodded, turned her back to me, and began to walk away. "Where are you going?" I asked as she exited the living room. "To feed...alone," she said quietly, "I need time to think."

When she left me alone, I immediately felt the distance...I felt my heart sink. All the euphoric, paternal thoughts I was having seemed to evaporate when she walked away from me. I hoped she wasn't going to leave me for good. I didn't know what I could do or say to make her feel better. I didn't fucking ask for any of this and if it wasn't for her disappearing on me, none of this would have ever happened. Obviously, she was dealing with her own demons and unlike her, I didn't have luxury of interfering in her thoughts to see exactly what her fucking problem was.

-Raven-

When I left his apartment, I was unsure of my next move. There he was: telling me that he was getting the one thing that I could never give him from another woman. What was I supposed to say: 'Congratulations'? I heard his thoughts as soon as I got to his balcony: 'I'm gonna be a dad! I'm going to be someone's father!' I could not tell at that time if he was actually shouting or if I was hearing his thoughts. When I heard this, I did not know what to expect when I walked in... I did not know if he was going to leave me for her or not. Though, I halfway expected it.

I knew this day would come, this is why I distanced myself in the first place. I knew that regardless of what he thought at the moment, eventually he will want to move on to the next level... a level that he would never be able to reach with me. Sure, I could marry him, but with him being a simple mortal, a union for eternity would be swift with him.

I was no fool, I knew that I brought this upon myself, if I was not so stuck on 'staying true to my plan' and took him back before he got with the bitch, I would not be having to decide how to deal with being the 'vampire stepmother'.

I shook my problems from my head and walked down the quiet street. Someone was following me and he was without a doubt going to be my next meal... Pretending not to hear the footsteps was extremely painful, though it was always funny for humans to think they could sneak up on me. Before long, I felt hands cover my mouth and a knife press against my throat. "If you want to live, you will stay quiet and give me some of that pussy. If you don't keep quiet, I'll fucking kill you and take it anyway," he growled into my ear pressing his erection against my ass. Ugh, fucking necrophiliac,' I thought, rolling my eyes. I nodded, using artificial fear.

He pushed me into an alley and up against the wall... he continued to use his knife as a scare tactic, keeping it against my throat . "What the fuck is a hot little piece of ass like you doing walking around in the middle of the night by yourself? Not smart, Honey... there's bad men out at this time of night. Bad men that want nothing more than to be balls-deep in the pussy of a dumb bitch like you who's out all by herself," he said, without a doubt trying to scare me.

"Really?" I said with a smile, "Bad men like you?"

"Yeah... bad men like me," he said with a nod, his eyes rolling over my body making me feel absolutely disgusting.

"Well, what if I was out looking for a bad man that was out looking for a girl like me?" I said with a smile.

He looked at me almost dumbfounded, but slowly began to realize what he thought I was saying.

"Oh, so you're out looking for trouble, huh, Bitch?" he said, almost unable to hide his excitement.

"Yes, I am," I said with a smirk.

"Well, you fucking found it!" he said as he began to use his knife on my blouse, cutting off button after button. 'Shit!' I thought, 'This is going to be really hard to explain to Keegan.'

"No, I am afraid that you are the one that has found trouble," I said as I released my fangs.

"What the fu-," he began but was unable to finish... I latched onto his jugular and drank until I drained his body dry. I just threw him in the dumpster like the trash he was. He was not worth any extra effort.

Though I felt a lot better, I still had no idea how I was going to deal with the problem or the discussion that was, without a doubt, waiting for me at Keegan's apartment.

I chose to walk back at a human's speed, nearly dragging my feet. Things had seemed so perfect but that was ignorant on my part. How long had I expected this to last? How long did I expect me to be everything to him? Of course, he would want more... it was only human. He was only human.

-Keegan-

Almost two hours had passed. It had never taken her this long to hunt before and I was almost certain that she wasn't coming back. I sat down on my couch with a beer, watching T.V. when, to my surprise, Raven came into the living room. Her shirt was missing buttons and she had an overall disheveled look about her.

"What happened to you?" I said, looking her over.

"Dinner wanted to rape me," she said, shrugging her shoulders.

"Oh...," I said, not feeling concerned if she wasn't. "What's wrong, Raven? You're not being yourself, Baby," I said, worry lacing my voice.

"Oh, Keegan, I am fine, just trying to get a hold on this whole 'baby' business," she said, her voice mildly cold.

"What do you mean, Raven?" I asked, trying to figure out exactly what she was trying to say.

"I just do not know how to deal with this! First, I never thought that I would have a human boyfriend. Second, I definitely never thought that my human boyfriend would be having a child with another woman... and the fact that I am a vampire just complicates things... a lot," she said carefully thinking about each word before it left her mouth.

"Are you going to leave me, Raven?" I asked, absolutely terrified to hear her answer.

"Are you going to leave me for the mother of your child, Keegan?" she asked in response to my question.

"What? No! Of course not, Raven! I would never leave you... especially not for Jenna," I said in all honesty. Jenna was a great woman, she was just vengeful and spiteful when she wanted to be. In my eyes, she didn't hold a candle to Raven.

"Are you sure about that, Keegan? I am a vampire. I will never be able to give you children or a normal relationship. Life with her would be simple and fulfilling, just as God intended it to be," she said as if every word pained her to say.

"I don't want simple and fucking fulfilling. I want passion! I want danger! I want you! I've never been one to play it safe, Raven, and I damn sure won't start now! You are mine and I am your's so we can just cut the bullshit and take it for what it fucking is. Yes, I'm going to be a father, but I will not lose you. We will make it fucking work, understand?" I said, my temper flaring.

"Yes, Sir," she said with a small, sexy smile. She walked over to me and pulled me down into a kiss... "Easy, Killer," she said, massaging my tense neck muscles, "I'm not going anywhere."

-Raven

As he laid beside me, sleeping, I realized just how much he meant to me. I thought about how lost I would be if things were to end badly... I almost wished I were human again, so I could live a normal life with him: Marriage, children, church on Sundays, the whole nine yards. It was foolish to think, of course, I would never be able to have anything like that...with anyone. Where would we go from here? He could not very well introduce me to his mother: "Hey, Mom, this is Raven. She's my girlfriend and she's a vampire. Please, don't forget to keep a nice, big jug of B+ so she won't murder you." God, this was so much more complicated than I thought it would be.

I still did not know how we were going to deal with any of this baby nonsense. I mean, I could not very well be around it on a regular basis. As awful as it sounds, an infant's blood is almost impossible to resist, though I have never had the heart to indulge myself with it. I preferred to avoid temptation as much as possible, which is why I frequented bars and not theme parks. However, Keegan told me that we would deal with it somehow and I was prepared to trust him with everything.

-Keegan-

I pulled her close to me, smelling the nice, clean smell of her shampoo. I had dozed off, unfortunately, and my time with her was slowly ticking away... "I love you," I grumbled as I kissed her forehead. "I love you, too," she replied, her voice almost a whisper.

"Keegan?" she asked, her voice still near silent.

"Yeah?" I said, opening an eye.

"Do you sometimes wish that I was a human?" she asked, her voice slightly cracking.

I tilted her head up to look into her eyes. "No, Sweetheart," I said honestly, "I embrace you for everything you are. I don't waste a fucking second of my time thinking about what you aren't. I love the fact that you're a vampire... the only thing that fucking sucks about it is that you have to leave me every morning. I wish that I could fall asleep holding you in my arms and wake up the same way."

She gave me a half-smile. "I could do something about that..." she said with a smirk.

"Really? Like what?" I asked as I searched her beautiful face for any signs of deception.

"I will tell you, but you will have to promise to not interrupt and listen very carefully," she said quietly. I nodded and leaned in as if she were going to tell a ghost story.

"If you want me to stay here, all we have to do is buy extremely thick window coverings to keep the sun out... or you can stay with me. My home is obviously already equipped for a vampire to live comfortably... but not a human. I do not want you to take this decision lightly, Keegan," she said raising her eyebrows, hoping I got her drift. I did.

"So you're saying that you... want us to move in together?" I asked, looking for a response.

"I do," she said, smiling.

I couldn't believe it! She wanted to take our relationship to the next level! I was so fucking happy! I grabbed her face and smothered it in quick, blissful kisses. I adored her.

-Raven-

As I listened to his thoughts, I could not help but swell with happiness, myself. I felt amazing knowing that I made him that happy and no one else. Simultaneously, it broke my heart... he had thoughts about 'the next level' but unfortunately, there were not many more 'levels' that we could advance to. I would not allow my harsh reality to spoil this moment. I pulled him into a tight hug and gave him a kiss. I loved him.

-Keegan-

Before long, it was time for her to leave me again. I promised her that I would go out and buy the thickest fucking curtains possible, so I could be sure that this was the last morning I would be without her. When she left, I wrapped myself up in my blanket and let a light sleep wash over me. As I slept, I dreamt of happiness...

I was walking down a bright hallway when I saw an open doorway. I leaned against the doorframe from which I saw Raven sitting in a rocking chair holding and singing to a baby...her beautiful voice echoed around the nursery. She was absolutely stunning as the sunlight danced on her face. When she finished her song, she looked up at me and smiled, her fangs were extended. After a moment, she gestured for me to come to her.

When I made it to her side, I looked down at the baby. It was a beautiful baby boy wrapped up tight in a blanket. I put my index finger in his closed fist and he woke up and smiled at me. "He is hungry... do you want to feed him?" she asked as she handed the baby to me. I nodded and she stood up and disappeared down the hallway. I sat down in the rocking chair and talked baby talk to my son. When she returned, she was holding a bottle with a thick, red liquid inside of it: blood. I took the bottle and put it into his mouth. He began to drink, his eyes glowed red...

To my surprise, I didn't wake up with a start or in a sweat. I just woke up, shrugged my shoulders and took a shower. True to my promise, after I ate and dressed myself, I caught a cab to a store and hoped they carried really fucking thick curtains.

When I walked in, a cute, thin redhead approached me. "Welcome to Jackson's! My name is Bella, can I help you in any way?" she said in an extremely prim and proper voice.

"I needed to find really thick curtains," I said looking at her.

"No problem, Sir, we have a really wide variety of energy efficient blackout curtains-" she began but I cut her off.

"No... I need more than just the average blackout curtains. My cousin is coming to live with me and he has Xeroderma Pigmentosum... any exposure to sunlight could be fatal," I said, my voice gravely serious.

"Right this way, Sir. I'll show you our extended collection," she said, gesturing for me to follow her. She purposely wiggled her little ass in front of me, she was adorable, just not adorable enough...

After about 20 minutes, I was checking out. The curtains cost over $60 a fucking panel... she had better be glad that I loved her. I caught a cab back to my place and began to mount the curtains. By the time I finished, I was fucking starving. I warmed up some leftover pizza and cracked open a beer. I sat down on my sofa and my cell phone rang. I picked it up... sure enough, it was Jenna.

"Hey!" I said when I answered the phone.

"So now you wanna act like you're fucking happy to hear from me," she said, her voice was shaky as if she had been crying.

"Whoa, Jenna... what's wrong?" I said, suddenly becoming worried.

"I did it, Keegan. I had the abortion."

-Raven-

His agony woke me out of my sleep. I could tell that the pain was not physical and there was no danger, but he was in emotional agony. I sat up, ready to go to him but I still felt drained... it was still too early, no less than four hours from dusk. Whoever was responsible would have hell to pay.

-Keegan-

As soon as those words left her mouth, I felt my heart break. "Wh-Why?" I choked out, tears running down my cheeks.

"It was for the best, Keegan... the baby was the product of a fucking one night stand! You didn't want nothing more out of it. Do you think it was fucking easy for me, Keegan? Plus, if you cared so Goddamn much, you would have acted like it!" she said, quick to point the finger back at me.

"That is such fucking bullshit and you know it! I was more than ready to step up and be a father, but it wasn't fucking enough! You were so pissed that I didn't want to be with you, you fucking murdered my child out of spite! Obviously, I was smart to not want to build anything with you... You are a fucking low human being and you deserve anything that comes your way because you are a heartless bitch! I never want to see or hear from you again, Jenna... lose my fucking number!" I yelled, hanging up the phone.