Is Love All or Nothing? Ch. 04

"No, my solution is come find out what dirt I can from you about Keith and what type of guy he is. At least until my boyfriend comes and we can see what makes this place so awesome."

"Well we can start by getting you a beer or a mixed drink and then maybe get your some of our famous wings."

"I'll start with a Bud Light tall draft and an order of wings, but you'd better spill about Keith."

Andy gets a tall draft glass and fills it up with Bud Light. He places it in front of Melissa. "So what is your first question?"

"Melissa did not do that!"

"Yes she did."

Keith just looks straight ahead with a look of fear on his face. "I'm sorry but your friend may be too crazy for me to stay in this relationship."

Jackie chuckles at Keith's statement, amused at his fear of her best friend. "Keith, you have nothing to fear from her, I promise. She isn't the one prying into your life about a random guy I met at a bar."

Keith looks at her with a look that just says, oh please. "Yea, and my best friend able to drop in on me anytime and somehow know what is going on with me all the time is a walk in the park."

"Pun intended?"

Keith chuckles, realizing what he said. "No pun intended this time."

They had been walking in the park for over an hour and enjoying each other's company. Keith shared stories from college and Jackie talked about getting her job, bars she's visited and how she and Melissa became best friends.

As they walked and talked, they were slowly moving closer and closer, inch by inch to each other. Their comfort with each other was growing to the point where they didn't mind sharing embarrassing stories about each other. Both had their reservations about talking about past relationships. Jackie didn't want to push asking about what happened between Keith and his ex and she knew she didn't want to reveal how damaged she really was from her past relationship.

"Anyway," Keith continues, "remind me to always be nice around Melissa. I would hate for her to do that to me."

"Don't worry, I'll just threaten to never tell her anything about our dates ever again. You could break up with me and I would never tell her."

"You can be one cold bitch, can't you?" Jackie grins staring ahead. "Now all of a sudden I'm scared for my life."

Jackie bumps into Keith and turns her face towards him. "You have nothing to fear from me because I know you'll treat me right. Besides, I know I can always go to Andy if I need to."

"Now that is not fair. You can use my best friend against me but I can't use yours against you."

"Life isn't fair Keith," she says walking even closer to the man she is slowly falling for.

Keith ignored the bump she gave him but definitely noticed that she moved closer to him and wasn't uncomfortable at all being so close to her. In fact, he felt she was sending him a signal that she was very comfortable with him. He decided to be bold and move his right arm around her back and placed his hand at her side.

Jackie loved feeling Keith's arm around her, even if was just around her back while walking in the park.

They continued walking, but now in silence. Jackie put her head against his arm. She had not felt so comfortable with any guy in a long time and feeling so safe when he is with her. She couldn't help but feel a stronger connection with Keith, but nothing that she had ever felt before. Her heart felt warm and her mind couldn't help but think of a possible future with Keith even more so.

Keith felt like he could soon let his walls down with this woman. The events that led up to them walking in the park from when they first met were strange to say the least. He still couldn't figure out how he was walking with such a beautiful woman. It wasn't her looks that he considered that had him. It was her kindness, willingness to stop talking about topics that made him uncomfortable, and just enjoy the moments they spend with each other. They didn't have to do anything big or amazing to just enjoy being with each other.

Keith was lost in those thoughts when he thought about offering a little show of affection. His Asperger's made it hard for him to know what was socially acceptable growing up and had led to more than one instance where he did or said something inappropriate on past dates. However he had a strong feeling what he intended to do would not be misconstrued. He tilted his head down gave a gentle light kiss on the top of her head.

Jackie feels the kiss and her heart feels like it skips a beat. While on the outside her face shows a small smile forming, on the inside she couldn't feel more loved at that moment in time. Everything Keith had done was with her permission or input. He was going out of his way to make sure she was comfortable in every aspect. Even when she was with another guy on another date, he was there to protect her from that would be date rapist. Her well-being was most important to him.

"So what were you planning on making for dinner?"

Keith smiles and looks down at her. "I was planning on making steak and rice pilaf, but I have yet to grab the steak."

Jackie looks up at him with a big smile on her face. "How about we head off to the grocery store then and grab what we need. Would you mind if I helped by making a salad?"

"I don't see why not. Just don't hate me when I say I just want bare basics of the salad; lettuce and cucumbers."

"I guess that is ok." Jackie says confused by Keith's request for an overly simple salad. "Anything else I could possibly add to your salad?"

"I do like broccoli and you can add baby carrots." Keith looks back at her with a look of sorrow on his face. "I know this is odd but if you give me time I'll explain why."

Jackie smiles back at him. "Ok, but don't feel like you have to rush to tell me."

They walk back to Keith's car with his arm still around her. When they get to the car, Keith opens to door for her again, but she kisses him on the cheek to say thank you before she enters the car and sits down. Keith closes her door and walks around to open his door and get in with a very big smile on his face.

They get to the grocery store fifteen minutes later and Jackie grabs a little basket as they enter. They separate agreeing that Keith will get the steaks and rice pilaf mix while Jackie went to produce to pick out everything she needed to make the salad. After getting everything she wanted, she went to the aisle with the salad dressing and picked out a small bottle of ranch for herself. They met back by the alcohol section to pick out the drinks for the evening. Jackie gets a bottle of Barefoot Pink Moscato and Keith gets a six pack of Budweiser. After they paid for everything, they put everything in the trunk and head to Keith's apartment.

"Geez Melissa, how many wings can you eat?" Andy asks, amazed that she had eaten twenty-four chicken wings without slowing down.

"I've had fifty in one sitting before. What can I say? I love food," she says with a smile on face covered in honey barbeque sauce. "Not to mention these are some of the best wings I've had in a good while. Oh, I'll take another beer please."

Andy gets her another beer and places it by her empty bottle. "Would you like another order of wings?"

"No thanks, but I would like an order of fries."

Andy goes to the POS terminal and puts in an order of fries for Melissa. The bar is still mostly empty like it normally is around 5:30. People usually don't start coming in until eight but he is happy to have some company for the evening. He goes back to where Melissa is sitting and tries to strike up a conversation with her. "So how do you think their date is going so far?"

"Well I have not gotten any texts from her asking me to rescue her so I would assume going pretty well. Besides, I'm sure Keith wouldn't do anything stupid." Andy just grins at her and chuckles a little bit. "What are some stupid things he has done on past dates?"

"Well there was one time he called a woman the wrong name while making out."

Melissa starts laughing pretty hard. "Yea, I would have slapped him if he did that."

"He wished he could forget that or the one where he puked on a woman."

"He did what?"

"In his defense, that was his first night drinking hard liquor and made the mistake of not eating anything while drinking but still that woman was out the door with her friends in seconds. He never showed his face at that bar again."

Melissa kept laughing for another minute before she composed herself in her slightly tipsy state. "Maybe I should text her to see how it is going. Keith doesn't seem to have the best history when it comes to dates."

"I wouldn't worry about it. He's gotten a lot better and those two have already overcome many awkward situations already starting with the first time they met here. I'm sure he won't make a fool out of himself again. Even if he does, it will just be another memorable date for them in the end."

"You really think those two have a chance?"

"Yes I do. They still have some big hurdles to cross but I think they will stay together."

"I hope so. Jackie hasn't had the best luck with guys in the past and I don't want to see her get hurt again."

"I'm sure everything will work out great for them."

"So what are some of the hurdles they have to face in your opinion?"

"What?" Andy says trying to fake not hearing her.

"You know what I said." Andy just looks away trying to make it seem like he is keeping busy. "Andy, what are you not telling me?"

Andy sighs knowing Melissa isn't going to give up without a fight. He starts talking while looking down at the bar. "There are things about Keith that I don't tell anyone out of respect for him and his privacy. It took a long time for me to gain his trust. I have seen him at his worst." He looks up at her and into her eyes to let her know how serious he is. "Keith needs to be the one to tell Jackie, not you or me. I will never betray his trust."

Melissa looks back at Andy with a confused look on her face. She is having a hard time imagining what Keith could be hiding. "It can't be that bad, can it?"

Andy shrugs his shoulders. "It all depends on how she takes it and when he tells her. I doubt he'll tell her anything tonight though."

Melissa takes another sip of her beer and sets it down on the bar. "Please tell me he is not mentally ill."

Andy knows the truth about Keith and that he has Asperger's. He has known it since their freshman year. He knows that it will be Keith's secret to tell. "No, he does not have a mental illness," he said in a depressed voice.

"Andy, please tell me. I can keep a secret."

He looks back up at her with a stern look. "Melissa, don't ask me to tell you again. Just like there are things about Jackie Keith needs to hear from her himself, the same goes the other way around."

Melissa realizes Andy is right and concedes. "You're right. Sometimes I wish my brother would have opened up to me and my family before..." she starts to tear up as her thoughts go to her brother.

Andy is no stranger to seeing people open up at the bar, especially after a few alcoholic drinks. He's seen his share of people talk about exs, what could have been, regrets and so on. However this was different. This is the best friend of the girl his best friend is dating. "You don't have to talk about if you don't want to."

Melissa wipes her tears away with one of the napkins provided for her wings. "No, it's ok." She takes a few seconds to compose herself before she continues. "I got home late one night from hanging with friends. There was a letter on the kitchen table for me and my family. It was from my brother." The tears slowly started coming down her face. "It was written by my brother. We knew he was different and had been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome a few months before that night. He wrote about he felt like no one understood him and that he was having very dark thoughts in his head. He would think about hurting people that hurt him, doing things he knew he shouldn't do. He was picked on a lot and had a lot of built up rage and didn't know how to handle it." She wiped more tears from her eyes and Andy gave her some more napkins. "Thank you. At the end he told us he loved us and didn't want any of us to be hurt by him in case he lost control. He...hoped we would be able to forgive him." There was a few moments of silence before she finished. "We found him on his bed along with an assortment of prescription drug bottles that we have no clue how he got."

Andy wished so badly that he could tell her Keith wasn't like that. He wanted to tell her Keith wasn't like that and had much better control of his Asperger's than her brother had but he couldn't. "I'm sorry Melissa. I wish I knew what to say right now."

Melissa wipes off more of her tears as she looks up and smiles. "It's ok Andy. I'm just glad you're a great listener."

Andy smiles, happy he is out of this jam. "It's part of the job but just know I'm always here for you if need a listening ear."

Jackie leans back in her chair after finishing the last bite of her steak. "You really do know how to cook a good steak. I think I'm in heaven."

Keith is leaning forward on the table, just looking staring at her with a big smirk his face. He had finished his steak a little before her. While he knew it was delicious and savory, he was just happy to spend more time with Jackie. He couldn't help but think where things could lead after the night. Would they end up boyfriend/girlfriend? He was lost in his thoughts before Jackie brought him back to reality by calling out his name.

"Earth to Keith."

"Huh? Sorry, I guess I got a little lost in my thoughts about us."

"Oh." Jackie gets a little smirk on her face and a twinkle in her eyes. "What about us?"

"Just how things are going well and I'm really enjoying spending time with you."

"I'm really enjoying spending time with you too Keith. This past week has been one of the best I've ever had."

"Well I hope this won't be best because I want every week to keep getting better for you." Jackie just starts melting when Keith finishes that sentence. To her, the day could not have gone any better and there was still the rest of the night for Keith to keep sweeping her off her feet. "Let's clean up our plates. Maybe we can watch some TV while we cuddle on the couch."

"I'd like nothing more than that," says Jackie with genuine excitement in her voice. They clean up and wash the dishes and the silverware. "Where do you keep your dishes and silverware?"

"I keep the dishes up on your right and silverware right below them in the drawer." After she dries them, she puts them in their place, she places the last fork away. Keith hugs her from behind and wraps his arms around her, placing his hands on her stomach. Jackie leans back into his chest enjoying the feeling of Keith's arms around her.

"I love the feeling of your arms around me. I feel nothing can go wrong when I'm in your arms."

They stand there like that for ten minutes, enjoying the moment. "As much as I'm enjoying this, could we move to the couch and enjoy some TV together?" Keith asks.

Jackie looks up at him with a big smile on her face. "Of course we can sweetie."

They go and sit on the couch and cuddle next to each other. Keith turns on the TV and ask, "Is there anything in particular you care to watch?"

"Not really. Just stop on a show you like and I'll let you know if I don't to watch it." Keith starts flipping the channels and he couldn't find anything to watch for a while until he sees an episode of House playing. Jackie smiles and gives Keith a kiss on the cheek. "I'm always down to watch House."

Keith returns the favor by kissing her on the forehead. "House is one of my favorite shows of all time."

They continue to cuddle, watch the episode, and just being with each other. Then the scene comes in the episode where Wilson comes into Cuddy's office where he reads the description of Asperger's syndrome.

"I hope people with that aren't actually assholes like House is."

"People with what?"

"People with Asperger's."

Keith looks down at her knowing the truth. "I've very sure they aren't like that. He is after all a scripted character that also has a drug problem and missing part of this thigh muscle."

Jackie shrugs. "I guess, but still one never knows."

"What if someone you knew for years told you that they had Asperger's and they were one of the nicest persons you ever met?"

Jackie paused and thought Keith's question for a minute before she answered. "I guess I would try to understand how it effects them, but still treat them the same." Keith was very happy with her answer and started gently rubbing her arm. "But I don't know if I could look at the person the same though," she continues saying. "Having a mental illness is pretty bad thing."

Keith stopped rubbing her arm and removed it from her side. "It is not a mental illness," he protested. "Asperger's is not something that drives people insane or makes them insane."

Jackie separates herself from Keith with an annoyed look on her face. "And what would you know about Asperger's?" Keith just looked down at the floor with his arms on his legs and hands together. He wasn't hoping to tell Jackie so soon. Her initial negative reaction was starting to have him worried. What was the best date of his life felt like it was about to crash and burn. "Tell me Keith. What makes you such an expert on Asperger's?" Jackie asks with anger in her voice.

"I'm just saying you shouldn't judge a group of people based on a TV characters portrayal and they don't even confirm he has Asperger's at any point after this."

"You're not answering my question Keith, what makes you such an expert?"

Keith is growing really frustrated with Jackie, but he doesn't want to reveal that he himself has Asperger's. He's had more than one woman end a date or say afterwards they didn't want to date someone with Asperger's. Still, he didn't like the fact Jackie was just saying people like him are mentally ill without really knowing anything about it.

"I'm not claiming to be an expert Jackie," Keith says raising his voice in anger. "I just don't make assumptions with any sort of condition, physical or mental."

Jackie still believes Keith is hiding more than he is telling. "What are you not telling me Keith?"

"Just drop it Jackie, please," Keith says hoping she will indeed drop it and the night can be salvaged.

"I'm not dropping it until you tell me why you got so upset. You didn't get so upset for no reason." Jackie knows at this point Keith is hiding something and she is determined to find out what. She's been lied to enough by her last boyfriend that she is not willing to let this go. She wants to know the truth.

Keith gets up and walks away, but quickly turns back to face Jackie. "Jackie, don't ask for something you do not want to know," he yells.

"Well guess what, I want to know!" Jackie yells back.

"Fine, I'll tell you that I have Asperger's!" Keith erupts at her. "I am not mentally ill as you so rashly assumed and I am not jerk until someone pushes my buttons like you have."

Jackie realizes what she did ask for she didn't want to know. Worse was the fact Keith just blew up at her and she is very scared for her safety. She gets up from the couch and goes to the counter where her purse is.

Keith knows his anger got the best of him and that he should have not blown up like he did. Asperger's never helped him in that department. He was always quick to explode or get upset over something simple. "Jackie, I'm sorry. Please don't go."

"I can't stay Keith, I don't feel safe around you," Jackie says as she searches for her cell phone in her purse. "I'm going to get an Uber to take me home."

Keith just stands there not knowing what to do or say next, but he is pretty sure he just needs to let Jackie go. His mind starts racing to all the scenarios of how Andy is going to scold him and tell him he screwed up. He sits down with his hands holding his head, covering his face in shame. A few minutes later he hears Jackie walk away and leave the apartment.