It's No Big Deal

Marie's mannerisms were different, for one thing she loved to curl up at his feet as he sat in his big soft easy chair. Then she would start rubbing them.

That progressed rather quickly to the bedroom, Gary found Marie's tiny body delightful. Happy and appearing content with Gary, she said yes very quickly when he asked her.

She also kept a perfect home, paying close attention to every detail.

Still, with his earlier experiences with women, Gary watched her like a hawk at first. In retrospect he should not have married her at all, but she was wonderful to his way of thinking.

There were no signs at all that she was doing anything other than taking care of him and the house.

After several months he began to relax.

Marie had told him all about her former boyfriend, the man at first refused to acknowledge being a father, then there had been a test and he was ordered to pay child support.

Of course he thus far never had paid any.

Then one evening there was a knock on the door, Gary answered it to find a stocky young man standing there.

Marie came in to see who it was, then she came to a stop.

"Manny. This is a surprise!" Gary realized she seemed pleased.

He felt his face flush but didn't say anything.

Marie and Manny had a long visit, Trish sitting on the floor in front of them, playing with a toy he had brought.

Gary busied himself in his den that he used as a home office some of the time, seething inside.

Manny apparently had a turnabout, he began to pay support, even extra to make up for the part he was behind, then it was visitations.

Marie began to change, it was noticeable. It was like her mind was elsewhere. Every other week Manny showed up to visit, go somewhere with the little girl.

Then came the bombshell, Gary should have seen it coming but he didn't. Manny began coming by on Fridays, then bringing Trish home on Sunday afternoon.

Of course Gary was at the office on Fridays.

+++

"We need to talk, Gary." She told him one Sunday afternoon before Manny had arrived with Trish.

"What's up, Honey?" He asked her.

"I don't know how to say this easily, so I am just going to. I am going back to Manny."

"What?" He looked at her.

"Don't get upset, it just happened."

"What just happened?"

"Manny was my..first, I still love him. Plus it's better for Trish."

"You have been screwing your ex?" Gary blurted out.

"It just happened, I am sorry. It's not you, it's just that with Manny....." She looked down.

Gary saw red, Marie got a frightened look on her face, but then there was a knock on the door. Marie went quickly and opened it. Manny stood there. Trish was not with him, Gary was glad for that.

"Did you tell him?" He asked her. He looked a little bit tense.

"She told me, you fucking bastard!" Gary yelled at him. Manny cringed slightly at that but stood his ground. Gary's instinct was to lash out, but he managed to control himself, barely.

"Hey look, Gary. Things just happen, you will find someone else. Let's don't make a big deal out of it." Manny said.

"No big deal? Fucking around with a man's wife is no big deal? You two had better get out of here." Gary told him, taking a step Manny's direction.

They understood the look on his face perfectly and quickly left.

The details were all like a blur to Gary, Marie didn't even ask for anything except for her personal items and her car.

That was actually a surprise, since it was a community property State. All that did was make Gary question himself, he was thinking there must be something wrong with him if money and possessions were not the problem.

Once again Gary was all alone in his oversized home. His second marriage had lasted longer than the first one, but only by a few months.

+++

Four years passed. Gary now disliked women, it showed also. Dating became a far and few between situation. He spent most of his time buried in work, the rest of the time he spent at home.

One thing that does happen when a man works very hard is that success comes. There was a vote of the stockholders and Gary was now on the board of directors. This meant perks, stock options. A year later the chairman of the board suffered a stroke which caused a major reshuffling of people, Gary was voted in as company president.

Stock options, a huge increase in salary, Gary was now financially secure for life. There was even an impossibly large golden parachute in case the other board members had one of those change of hearts.

His life was going very well, yet the huge hole remained.

Twice more over the next year he got to the point of perhaps developing a relationship, both times ended with him unable to perform.

He found himself slipping into solo sexuality, he had no problems at all in those quiet moments, but with women he just could not get himself going.

Those incidents were an embarrassment to him, he even spent one hell of a lot of money with Doctors, then therapists.

There was no real change there, finally he gave up. He could not take the sad look a partner gave him and he just could not stand being told to not worry, it happens to everyone.

+++

Gary began to pamper himself by getting weekly massages. For some reason a touch from a female filled a hole in his life, but there was nothing sexual about it.

By this time he had given up on dating completely.

Then one day his regular massuese named Brenda was ill, so he called another one.

Jewell, the woman that arrived was a bit older, around 40 or so. That part he didn't care about, he just wanted the work.

The session was different, he found himself daydreaming. Somehow when she touched his hip, her hand sliding across his pelvis and her fingers brushed his genitals lightly, he felt a response. Brenda had never done that.

When he felt a dampness at the corners of his eyes, that was strange also. Something inside of him, something emotional he didn't understand happened.

Then her hands were on him, he felt himself come fully erect. His orgasm was intense, not a single one but several in a row, each one building more and more until his mind was empty.

Gary finally opened his eyes and looked at Jewell, she was watching his expression with a smile.

"I usually don't do that, but I could sense that you needed that, sir." She said quietly.

That was the only time he saw Jewell, when Brenda came back Gary asked her flat out if she objected to offering a "more personal type service" as he put it.

Brenda smiled and told him she didn't mind at all.

"You never asked me before." She said simply.

Once again his body responded, he found that if he could get into that mental state where he was not thinking about anything at all, his body was normal. He also found that if he thought about any of the things that happened with women in his life, he would nearly instantly lose his erection.

It took a bit of time, but Gary managed to train his mind to just accept, thinking of nothing at all but sensations.

Gary's life changed once again, he used Brenda as an outlet for weeks. Then when one of the sales reps arrived for a meeting, she was shown into his office. Her name was Marilyn Carter, she was dressed in a grey business suit.

Gary took her to lunch, then that evening he took her home. Marilyn's body was spectacular, and he managed that same state with her.

"That was fun." She smiled up at him, naked and sweaty. Then she glanced down, Gary was still erect.

"Damn!" She mumbled, reaching for him.

The change was incredible, Gary found he could let his mind drift into some kind of mental state, and when he did he could erect and stay that way.

He did realize that he had discovered something that perhaps porn stars use. While he did not completely understand it, he took full advantage of it.

Over the next several months he took one woman after another, it was almost like he was using himself as a weapon, punishing them with meaningless invasions. He had discovered that being aggressive worked very well with most women.

He also developed quite a reputation.

Not once did he ever go back for a second session.

A few of the women did not take that well.

The hole in Gary's life remained.

+++

A envelope arrived one day, it was a notice of his class reunion. He dropped it into the trash, then he was on the internet and glanced down at it lying there in the wastebasket.

The reunion was the following Saturday, so he thought about it.

"Why not?" He said to himself.

Gary noticed puzzled looks as walked into the room, barely familiar faces turned to look his way. He knew why, the 147 pound boy that graduated from high school was now a solid 200 pounds thanks to the years of regular workouts in the gym. Even the few years he had not gone after the breakup with Lee had not softened him much, he now used equipment he had at home.

He found he had to introduce himself to nearly everyone, even at that he got some disbelieving looks. Then he heard a familiar voice.

"Hello, Gary." She said.

Gary turned, there stood Shelly Martin. She was heavier than he remembered, her hair was in the same style and she really did look about the same as when they were kids, except for appearing more mature.

"Hello." He smiled at her, she looked him up and down.

"Wow, you really filled out, didn't you? I almost didn't realize it was you." She dazzled him with a smile.

It didn't take long and they were sitting at a table, bringing each other up to speed.

"So tell me, Gary? Something I always wanted to know. Why did you quit talking to me, I thought you liked me?" She asked.

"I did. But I saw you kissing Jack Branston down at the ball field."

"Oh. So that was it. You should have told me." She gave a slight chuckle.

"Why? I was upset, I guess I figured you liked him more than me."

"It was that kiss we had, I wanted to know if it was always like that. I never forgot the feeling it gave me." She smiled at him.

"I guess I felt the same way, I was on my way to take you out for a soda when I saw that."

"If you had just said something, things might have been different. I might not be married to Jack." She said.

"You married Jack Branston?" Gary asked, surprised.

"Yes, we have two kids. He still works at the Chevy dealership for his Dad." She got a far away look in her eyes.

"Are you married?" She asked.

"No. I was, twice, but they didn't work out."

"That's too bad. What are you doing now?" She asked.

"I am with WTD Industries, I am the company President." Gary told her.

"Really?" Her eyes went wide.

"Yes, really."

"Wow. That's neat. Say, would you like to go somewhere?" She asked suddenly.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"Well, you and I have never...done it. Jack won't mind, we both have our little bits of fun." Shelly grinned at him.

"But..you are married?"

"It's no big deal, just having some fun. I would really like it." She reached out and touched his hand.

"There is no way in hell!" Gary told her, pushing his chair back and getting up. Shelly got a startled look on her face, as Gary turned and walked out the door.

"Fucking women! They are all the same!" He said aloud as he drove to his hotel. Back in his room, he poured himself a drink out of the robo bar, then went to bed.

The next day, before heading to the freeway back to his home, he decided to take a trip by the old house where he grew up. His Mother had passed years earlier and the place had been sold.

He was pleased to find the yard was neat as a pin just like his Mom had always kept it. The house had been painted, the roof was new, easy to tell since it was a different color.

Other than that, it was like he had never left. He parked on the street and watched, being there gave him a feeling of comfort.

At the house next door, an old man came out. He sat on the porch, glanced Gary's way, then opened a newspaper.

Gary realized the old man was Mr. Webb, Charlotte's father. He got out of the car and walked up to him to ask about his friend Charlotte from so many years ago.

Before he could ask, the door opened and there she was.

"Gary! My God! I didn't expect to see you!" She hurried over and hugged him. Then she started wiping her hands on her apron, Gary realized she had flour on them.

"Oh, I must look a mess!" She tried to brush her hair back from her face but only managed to get some flour on her cheek.

"You look wonderful." He told her. She did, too. Even in blue jeans and a T-shirt, with an apron around her neck she looked great.

The glasses she always wore were gone, she was slimmer although she was still slightly heavy.

"Hey, let's go get some Coffee, catch up?" He blurted out.

"I can't. I would love to but..Dad..?"

Gary glanced at Mr. Webb, that was when he realized.

"Dad had a stroke several years ago, I can't leave him." She told Gary.

"Can he just come along with us?" Gary asked.

"Sure, I guess so. If you don't mind?" Charlotte looked at Gary with surprise.

They walked slowly down the street, Mr. Webb stopped periodically to look at everything like it was all new to him.

Then they sat and politely listened as the old man told them stories. Gary found himself glancing at Charlotte a lot, she did appear different.

When they walked back to her house, she held her father's hand the whole way.

Later as they got her Dad settled happily in his chair in front of the TV set, they moved to the porch to visit.

Gary told her of his brief experiences with marriage, she told him that she had been out just a few times but nothing ever came of it. Then when her father fell ill her life became a full time job just caring for him.

It was just after midnight before Gary left.

She stood and looked at him, smiling as he prepared to leave.

"Do you remember our date? When you kissed me?" She asked.

"Yes, I do."

"I was thinking perhaps you might like to do it again?" She asked shyly.

"I would love to!" This time Gary took her gently into his arms and their lips met.

The sensation took him spinning back in time, it was almost like he was a kid again, feeling her lips on his.

"Charlotte, can I maybe come back and visit? We could go out for dinner, or do anything you would like."

"I would really like that." Charlotte was beaming.

+++

On the long drive back to his home, he found himself thinking about Charlotte.

There was certainly something different there.

The next day he called and they talked for several hours. Two days later he called again, then finally Gary found himself in his car driving down.

He had an older woman named Tammy with him, she was a registered nurse he hired to look after Charlotte's father. He realized that Charlotte and her father lived on a tight fixed income, no way could she afford to hire someone, she finally agreed when he suggested that.

The date was a fine meal, then dancing. Once again, dancing with her was like holding a cloud in his arms.

Gary by then knew all the things to say, all of the tricks of seduction, he used none of them.

Over the next few months, he went to see her at least once a week, it became a high point in his life. It crossed his mind a couple of times to perhaps ask her if she would like to spend the night with him, but he just could not bring himself to ask.

During that period, he stopped completely with the string of one night stands he had been having, for some reason he had no desire to do any of that.

Then one evening they were sitting in a park, at a picnic table. No one was around, the evening was warm. He was enjoying the talk, the holding hands. He leaned over and kissed her, feeling again the comfortable sensation.

"Gary, may I ask you a question?" She looked right at him.

"Of course you may."

"I was wondering, you seem to like our being together but you never....?" She hesitated and blushed.

"I do like being with you, I guess I just don't want to...spoil it?"

By then Gary had told her about his experiences with women, his marriages. He hadn't told her much about any of the affairs, with her he found admitting that would be shameful.

"I see. We will just be..friends then?" She asked.

"I think we are more than that, I really do like being with you." He told her.

Nothing more was said, those few words hung in the air between them. Gary dropped her off like he had done so many times before.

"Your Dad is sleeping." Tammy told Charlotte when they came in. Charlotte went in to check.

"So are we driving back this evening again, boss?" Tammy asked him.

"Yes, I guess so."

+++

Gary had just slipped into the center lane on the freeway when Tammy turned to him.

"So when are you going to do something about that?" She asked him with a grin.

"What do you mean?"

"Charlotte is hopelessly in love with you, and you just keep getting in the car and leaving."

"I guess I am in love with her, too. It's just that, every time I meet someone things just seem to go all to hell."

"That one is different, boss." Tammy told him.

Gary slowed the car, pulled off to the side.

"Do you really think so? She likes me that much?" He asked her.

"Good God, you are dumber than a damn box of rocks about women, aren't you? That woman probably can't even sleep tonight because you aren't there and she isn't sure you will come back!" Tammy told him.

"What do I do about that?"

"Go back and just grab her." Tammy grinned.

"Just like that?"

"Yea, just like that!" Tammy broke up laughing.

Gary put the car into gear and did a U-turn, drove back the Charlotte's house.

She looked at him in surprise when he reached out and pulled her into his arms, then he kissed her, so she grabbed him right back.

But now what in the hell was he going to do? Tammy was out in the car looking their way, and he was her ride back.

She solved that by putting the car into gear and driving away, laughing with a wave.

"I think I am stranded here." He grinned at Charlotte.

"Good!" She smiled up at him.

Much later that night, the old man sat out in his chair, rocking back and forth like he did most of the time now.

Then his daughter came out in her robe, and asked him if he was all right and if he needed anything.

The old man shook his head no, then went back to rocking quietly. Somewhere deep inside his mind he knew that boy, he was the one who took his daughter out on her very first date.

Charlotte had really liked him, but for some reason the boy didn't take her out again.

But now he was here, how long had it been? The old man was not sure of that.

She had came out quietly, leaned down and whispered to him that she and Gary were going to get married. Then she had kissed him on the cheek, and went back into the room with the boy.

The old man's face then broke into a huge smile, and he began to rock more firmly.

He knew very well what they were doing in there, the look on the young man's face matched that of his daughter's.

"About damned time!" He mumbled to himself.

The old man sat and rocked, humming a happy tune.