It's Time to Let Go Now, Daddy

"Mr. Migdol, Mr. Russo would like your presence in the sitting room for coffee and after dinner drinks with Mrs. Russo and your guest," he politely requested. As I looked at this mountain of flesh, I wondered if anyone was dumb enough to refuse him. I sure wasn't.

We walked to the sitting room like old friends. He opened the door and announced my presence. If he wasn't a hard guy, you would have sworn that he had attended English butler school.

"Tommy, I hope we haven't interrupted your reading but the ladies felt your presence was required," Frank stated.

"No problem. I finished the report you had prepared for me. I was just contemplating my follow-up actions. Believe me, I would much rather be in the company of these two beautiful women than reading a report," I replied.

I was rewarded by two smiling faces.

Frank looked over at his wife and Maria, "I think you have just made two friends for life."

Maria made room for me to sit next to her. Her hand intertwined with mine and I never realized it had happened. She just felt "right" next to me.

"Tommy, tomorrow you and I will make plans to resolve your problem. I would like to resolve it for you. After all, isn't that what friends are for?" he replied.

He continued, "There are personal reasons too. The man is a bigot. He does not like Italians or Jew....ish people."

"I know people like that also. They don't like kikes or wops either," I answered with a smile.

Frank smiled back at me as I continued, "Frank, my life style is far from what my childhood religion teaches, but I still don't like name callers. He should be taught a lesson in respect."

As much as I wanted to be the bearer of revenge, I felt that Frank's offer should be honored. The four of us had a very enjoyable evening just talking and comparing our lives. Later that night Maria and I made love. It was not raw sex, but something greater. It was almost a joining of souls.

As we cuddled in post coital bliss, I tried to devise a plan for us to be together. I couldn't. We were just too far apart. She was in South America and I was in North America and that's just location. There were also our various business interests to consider in the equation.

I could not see a way. We were doomed to spend our lives apart. The next evening as I boarded on a red eye back to the east, I saw a very sad lady being supported by Frank and his wife. My heart broke, but I was a tough guy and could show no emotion. My #2 understood my true feelings. He just put an arm around me and said, "Someday, my friend. She'll be yours."

About a month later I got an envelope in the mail. There was no return address on it. In it was a newspaper article about an insurance ex who was badly beaten in a robbery attempt. He was expected to live, but would never walk without special support again. There was also a typed note with the article. It stated that the man was also a eunuch. That was left out of the newspaper.

I sent Frank a thank you note. It was just a simple card with only "Tommy" as a signature. As I sent it, I realized that nothing had been done to my wife. I hoped she would suffer and have a hard life.

Time and distance got between Maria and I. We started calling each other weekly, then it dropped to monthly, then to a couple, three times a year. Then nothing but a Christmas card (for her) along with a birthday card, the cards were sent by my secretary. I didn't even sign them. From her I got nothing. I guess she moved on.

I only received one more tidbit of information on my wife. Her lover was medically retired from his insurance company. I suspected that he was given the choice to retire or be terminated, maybe because I had divorced my wife using adultery as a reason. Then my attorneys sued both her and her lover's employer for allowing the affair when the company's own employee prohibited employee/supervisor relations. My legal team sued for a couple of million expecting to settle for less.

Their legal team did not know the extent of my connections. A week after the insurance company refused my claim; they were hit with major claims. It seems that all of their large customers experienced major losses on the same night. These claims ran into the tens of millions.

A week later my legal team contacted them again. Again they refused to negotiate. They were stupid. Two weeks later they were hit again by major claims again. Only this time they were also met by their largest customers jumping ship.

It took four months before they were forced into bankruptcy. I never got any money from the company, but my ex-wife's boy friend lost his pension in the process. My ex was forced back to work to support her lover and my daughter in a low position.

I walked around with a huge smile on my face. My guys assumed I had a little chickadee on the side, but Gino knew better.

+++++++++++++++++

I heard the nurse walk back into the room. "How's he doing?"

"No change," was the answer.

"I have to give him a massage to prevent bed sores. Want to learn how?"

My daughter's voice filled with hope, "I'd love to. Will this help him?"

The nurse tapped me on the forehead, "If he's still in there, he'll know."

As the two of them rolled me from side to side, I got to see my room. It was a pleasant single room, well appointed and cheerful. I drifted off into darkness again, remembering earlier times.

+++++++++++++++++

My life in organized crime improved. I went from just a wise guy to a big boss. OK, I wasn't Italian, but I was respected and allowed a seat on the council. My fortune increased, but I was still lonely. I got all the pussy I wanted. But getting laid just didn't fill that empty spot in my heart.

I missed my daughter. She was 12 years old when her mother snatched her from me. I tried to continue my relationship with her, but my letters to her were returned, birthday and Christmas presents returned unopened. My attempts at telephoning her resulted in changed numbers and unanswered calls when caller ID revealed an east coast call.

One day it all came to a head, my ex called me.

"Sheila does not want anything to do with you. I told her that you were responsible for Jonathan's injuries. Leave us alone!"

Before I could vent, she broke the connection. It was all my bodyguards could do to keep me from getting on the next plane west and killing my ex.

When I finally calmed down, I vowed to have no contact with any of them again. I closed my heart to them. I kept that promise for another ten years.

I would probably still be keeping that promise if in my regular mail a wedding invitation had not arrived. My daughter was getting married in June to a Mr. Michael Worthington. The invitation was not signed and there was no response card included. I suspected my friend Frank was responsible. So I called him.

"Hello my friend," he answered after I identified myself.

"Thank you for inviting me to my daughter's wedding."

"You deserve to attend. She is your only child. A father should be there. I'll make all the arrangements for your accommodations and transportation. I could not arrange for you to be a part of the ceremony," a sympathetic voice concluded.

"You are a true friend. I accept your invitation. I bet my ex will be very upset at my appearance."

"Don't worry, my people will keep her from acting up. "

We finished our call.

Well at least I would have something new to dream about. These days I would wake up cuddled up to a pillow about once or twice a week. I would awake dreaming of Maria. I'd snuggle up to that pillow believing she was in my arms, wrapped up after a night of love making. But alas, I would wake from my dream alone.

My other dreams were of inflecting pain on my ex and her lover. I must admit that I enjoyed these fantasies. When I awoke from one of those dreams I was also disappointed, but this time because the dream wasn't true. I hated both of them and someday I would extract my personal revenge. I would make them suffer for all the pain they subjected me to.

The months until the June wedding moved slower than usual for me. I couldn't wait to see my little girl again. I also wanted to see the love of her life. I wanted to make sure he was worthy of my little girl. I called my friend Frank and asked him to check out the young Mr. Worthington.

It took about a month, but I finally received a call from Frank Russo.

"Hello Tommy my old friend. I have good news for you. Your future son-in-law is someone to be proud of."

He continued, "Mike, met Sheila when they were both in college. She was a freshman and he was a junior. It appears that it was love at first sight. They met in an elective course that was one of three choices required for their majors."

"Tommy, he is a great kid and completely enamored with your daughter as she is with him. When he graduated, he got a job and an apartment near the college. She moved into the apartment a few months later and they became engaged.

They have been completely faithful to each other ever since they met."

They moved to LA after she graduated and both got very good jobs. I admit that I did what I could to assure their future. "

"Thank you," I interrupted.

"You're welcome. Now her degree is in Social Work so I arranged for her to interview with a hospital where I have a few friends. She was accepted. Michael was more of a problem. Tommy, your future son-in-law is a cop. A very well respected cop assigned to the "Organized Crime" division. So I think you can understand my reluctance to help him progress in his chosen profession."

"She's marrying a fucking cop?" I exclaimed.

"Yes Tommy, she is. I'm sorry. But look at this from the bright side. If you continue to live on the East coast, you'll be out of his jurisdiction, unless he becomes a fed."

"God Damn it. I'll bet her mother did that on purpose."

"Calm down my friend. My people tell me that your ex had nothing to do with Sheila meeting Mike. AND Sheila has no idea what you do for a living. Your ex convinced Sheila that you are nothing more than a construction worker, thus 'The Hammer' nickname."

"Frank, that's good news. What does my ex think happened to her husband?"

"This is the good part. She believes that he was mugged and crippled by the muggers. She believes his castration was a part of the mugging. Remember I told you that he was a bigot? Well your ex believes that Jonathan said something to his muggers and they retaliated. We're off the hook on that one." Tommy could hear the smile in his voice.

"So get out here and spend a few days visiting with us. Leave Gino in charge. I'll provide you one of my guys. They like you. And my wife is looking forward to your visit. So be prepared."

"Frank, I can't wait to see you again. I have good memories of the last time we met when I had Maria with me. I know a relationship with her was impossible, but I still have fond memories of the three days we spent with you."

"Tommy, I'll bring you up to speed on her. I do some business with her father occasionally." Was all he said. And from his tone it wasn't encouraging.

+++++++++++++++++

I became aware of my surroundings again. By the sounds I was hearing it must be night. The usual hustle and bustle of a busy hospital was quiet. My eyes must have been taped closed because I could see no light.

I tuned my senses up and was able to discern that there was someone in the room with me. This time I was sure it wasn't a woman. At first I feared that one of my enemies had discovered me. But I quickly dismissed that fear. I had been out of crime for about 30 years. There was no one out there who still wanted me dead. And besides, all they had to do was wait. I was really close.

The familiar noise of those shoes that all nurses wear entered the room. "Hi, Judge Worthington. How's he doing?"

"I don't know. My wife says she sees all sorts of signs that he's still in there. But I don't. Maybe it's just wishful thinking on her part."

"Where is she tonight?"

"Our daughter went into labor about four hours ago. They are up on the Maternity floor."

"Well I've got to get him ready for night. If you want to visit your daughter, I'll be with your father-in-law about an hour. I don't have a lot to do tonight, so you can take your time," answered the nurse.

Judge Worthington, I'd forgotten how well he succeeded over the years. He had started out as a detective and now look at him, a federal judge. I admit that I did help his career out a little. You know a political contribution here, a bribe there. Sometimes it was just tipping the right people on his taskforces to the location of the bad guys, and of course making sure that his name was always on TV or in the newspapers didn't hurt either.

"OK, I'll accept your offer and check in maternity. Dad, I'll be back a little later."

He never called me "Dad" to my face before. I was always the "Black Sheep" in the family. I never visited them or called. I was proud that he now accepted me.

My mind drifted again back in time. I guess when a person's time gets near they live a lot in past memories.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I remembered standing in that church with my two bodyguards when a detective pushed his way into our row. He completely ignored me and concentrated on my two bodyguards.

"OK you clowns, where's Frank Russo?" He demanded in that normal cop tone.

I interrupted him and said, "They're with me. They are escorting me to my daughter's wedding. She's marring one of you and I hope he has a lot better manors."

The detective zeroed in on me, "And just who are you?"

"I'm the real father of the bride, not the asshole who is walking her down the aisle. My daughter was kidnapped from me by my ex wife. I came to see her get married. Now are you going to make waves? "

"Who invited you?" he demanded.

"OK, I guess you can't take a hint." I said as I took out my cell phone. "I'm calling the State Attorney General's Office and filing a complaint against you for harassment. That will stop the wedding and effectively end your career, asshole."

"Listen maybe we can discuss this," he began back peddling.

"Listen, I'm sorry. The groom is in my section and I thought these two were here to break up his wedding."

"So who's the guy in the wheel chair?" he asked.

"He's her step father. A real jerk. But she didn't choose him. Her mother did. She thought she was upgrading when she left me."

"Well I've met the guy and believe me he's a real looser. I felt sorry for him being mugged until I met him. He's a real bigoted asshole," the cop replied.

"Well believe me when I say, I don't want anything to spoil my little girls wedding. Now either sit with us or go away." I demanded.

"I'm here with my wife."

"OK. Go, and remember cops don't scare me." I growled.

As he walked back to his pew, I felt the bodyguard behind me pat my back and whisper, "You've got real balls my friend."

The crowd in the church started to shift around as the music changed. I saw a woman in her early 50's being escorted down the aisle by one of the young ushers followed by a man of about the same age. I suspected these were the parents of the groom. The woman looked as proud as punch.

Next came my ex-wife. She no longer was the pretty young thing I once loved. The years had not been kind to her. So much for her upgrade to a richer man. Her smile was set and her eyes were hard. It was almost as if she was ranking the people in the church. I wonder what she was appraising them against.

I looked at her and thought,"What a phony."

+++++++++++++++++

Then lying in that hospital bed, I had a flash back to how it all began so many years ago.

+++++++++++++++++

I had just graduated from college and was beginning my career in industry. Well not really, it is a bullshit persona I invented to use when I picked up women. I actually grew up in a lower class working neighborhood. I was expelled from school in my junior year for selling drugs to my classmates. I was arrested and put in a juvie detention center for two years. It was in that center I met my current friends and turned the corner. Not into becoming a model citizen, but a soulless killer.

My first victim was another inmate. He raped me in the shower one day. Two weeks later I cracked his skull open with a hammer I took from the shop. I began my carrier in crime.

I met my ex-wife Sharon in a club. She was a dark haired, blue eyed beauty with a body to die for. I gave her my college grad and factory exec persona. Hell I was in my early 20's and a fine looking guy. My career in crime required that I keep myself trim and fit.

We hit it off and were married about a year later, Sheila was born a year after that. We were a happily married couple for many years. I pretended to go to work. I told her that I worked all three shifts when necessary running back and forth between our three plants. Two of them some 60 miles away. I even set up a phony phone number for her to call if she needed me for an emergency. If you over look me lying my ass off about my work, I thought we had an honest relationship.

When Sheila turned 12, Sharon went out and joined the work force. She started working at a large insurance company. I never suspected a thing until I came home one night and they were gone.

It was the last time I saw them until now.

+++++++++++++++++++++

I remembered my eyes meeting Sharon's and she stumbled in her walk down the aisle. I could see the realization in them when she recognized me. I smiled my cruelest smile. There I stood in my early 50's looking fit and very wealthy. My clothes and grooming were impeccable. I looked every bit the successful business man, a very wealthy, successful business man.

Sharon recovered her poise and continued down the aisle. People around the church tried to figure out exactly what was going on. I put on my nicest smile. I looked perfectly innocent of any wrong doing. And I loved the feeling that I had hurt Sharon. That I affected her perfect little life.

I was still smiling as the bridal party started their walk down the center aisle. First came two adorable flower girls that were three or four years old and just as cute as could be. They were followed by a ring bearer in his little tux. You could hear all the parents and grandparents shuffling around for a better look.

Then the music shifted to Mendelssohn's Wedding March. All eyes turned to face the rear of the church. Sheila entered all dressed in white. She was perfect. Ok maybe I was a little biased but you must remember, it had been ten long years since I last saw her. At that time she was a gawky 12 year old just starting to fill out into a woman. Today I was looking at the end result. I was a proud papa.

Next to her was a motorized wheelchair with a fat old man in it. He had a stupid expression on his face. It was as if he thought this parade was for him. He maneuvered the wheelchair up the aisle forcing the bride to yield to him. Someone on his side of the aisle stepped out and whispered something to him. His chair stopped and the bride caught up and went ahead.

She never waited for him to catch up.

The step father pulled his chair up to the foot of the stairs leading up to the alter while the brides maids and groom's men took their positions around the bride and groom. The photographer was snapping away while trying to be invisible. The minister started the service.

When he asked, "Who here gives this bride in holy matrimony?" I jumped to my feet and yelled, "I, her real father do."

The noise level in the church increased drastically.

My daughter turned and faced the assembly, "Daddy? Is it really you?"

"Yes honey, it's me. There is nothing your mother or Ass...Jonathan could do to prevent me from attending my little girl's big day."