J is for Josie

"Well we come here quite often, Gwen is just in the kitchens chatting to one of our neighbours who works here. Come on, we're early, let's have a drink, I hate drinking alone."

And Mr Franks took Dad by the arm and encouraged him round the corner from the restaurant towards the bar. I was still grabbing hold of my Dad's other hand, I had to follow.

Dad was stuck. We had no choice. I knew I had to do what I could to try to help him out, presumably Mr Franks's wife might arrive at any moment, or their table might be ready. Maybe we could get out in a couple of minutes. But I just didn't know what to say. I mean, 'as a woman' I just wasn't into social chit-chat, obviously.

Mr Franks was looking at me, smiling widely. Quickly I tried to think what Mum would have done in that situation. Then I knew. She'd use her most effective weapon, or rather weapons. I slid past Mr Franks into a space by the bar right next to him and turned to hoist myself up onto the stool, crossing my legs as I did so that the slit in my skirt opened to reveal something of my nylon-covered thighs.

"Please, Mr Franks. Call me Josie."

That stopped him. He stopped pushing my Dad, he stopped saying anything, he just looked - at my legs and at my bulging bosoms. Dad realised. He was probably horrified at what I'd done but he realised why.

"I'll get them. Whisky, is it, Neil? And what about Gwen?"

Dad got the drinks while I chatted to Mr Franks. Now I really was being Mum. She had always been a bit of a flirt, keen to chat to men they met when they went out. Nothing serious of course, not until this Terry guy came along.

"Neil, have we met before? I don't think so, I'd remember, I'm sure I would."

OK then, just a bit of flattery then. I knew I had to 'role-play' Mum until Dad or I worked out a way to get out of this, and as quickly as possible.

"How's the house move going. Mark hasn't said much about it for a while?"

"It's going OK, thanks. Mark really appreciates being able to get to work easier. And it does mean we see quite a lot more of him."

"That's good, and what about - oh, hang on a moment."

Dad had just got the drinks, I assumed he'd got me a tonic water. That was what I usually had, I was allowed one glass of wine when we went out but no more. But Mr Franks - Neil - had turned to Dad.

"Mark, is that Jim Sanderson over there? I think it is. I think he's seen you, you'd better go over and say hello. Got to keep your clients happy, Mark."

Dad looked across at me. He knew he had to leave me, and he knew that this was getting complicated. He did go over and shake hands with and begin to talk to this Jim person. I was left with Mr Franks. I was determined to do my job, to be 'Mark's wife' for as long as it took until we were able to get out of there.

"Good man, your Mark is, Josie. He's after a promotion soon I hear."

"Er - yes, he is. Well he does seem to work hard, Mr Franks. I mean Neil."

I smiled, hopefully just encouragingly, I wanted to boost Dad's chances of the promotion or at least not to do anything which would cause problems. And I knew that if Mr Franks found out Dad had taken out his son dressed as his wife, well, almost certainly that was so weird. It would scupper any promotion prospects and it might even cost him the job itself.

I had to be convincing. I was thinking of things to say or do which would help Mr Franks to believe I really was Jo, or at least Josie, Dad's wife.

"Well I think he's in with a good chance. Another drink, Josie?"

Mr Franks had finished his drink quite quickly. I just muttered a 'yes' to his request.

"Gin and tonic, is it?"

I had to mutter another 'yes', and began to sip it slowly when it arrived. Dad was still occupied across the room. I could see he was torn between trying to get away and also doing what he needed to do to stay in Mr Franks's good books. I remembered something, and opened my handbag to take out the pack of Mum's cigarettes and the lighter I'd brought with me. Though not a regular smoker I'd tried it like lots of young people, and could manage the mechanics of it and so on. I had a little difficulty taking one out of the pack with my long nails but I managed it.

"Allow me," offered Mr Franks, taking my lighter and lighting the cigarette for me.

"Thank you," I muttered, feeling a lot more grown up, with the cigarette and the gin-and-tonic, hoping they would help in the illusion I was trying to foster. And they did!

"I'm sure we haven't met, I know I'd remember such an attractive woman."

And Mr Franks wasn't just flirting now - he had a hand on my knee! I was torn, beginning to have difficulties with my emotions really, simply because - I liked it! The thought that Mr Franks was in some way interested in me excited me. But I realised - I was supposed to be a married woman. How the hell would a woman put down unwanted advances in such a situation? I had to play it by ear. I reached down and took Mr Frank's hand in my own, removing it from my knee.

"Now, now, Neil. Let's take this slowly shall we?"

And I smiled widely at him. But I kept hold of his hand, gently stroking it with my long red-nailed fingers.

"We don't want Mark to see anything, do we? Anyway, he's coming back," I whispered rather conspiratorially.

And I gave Neil's hand a squeeze and let it go, smiling again at him. This was it -- a chance to get out!

"Mark, darling," I said as my 'husband' returned. "I think we really should make a move."

And I stood up and put out my cigarette, finished my drink and turned to slide an arm into his.

"Er - yes, we better had. I'm sorry Neil, pass on our best wishes to Gwen. See you Monday," Dad said.

He was audibly -- and visibly -- relieved. And we left, my arm through Dad's, probably with quite a few pairs of eyes on my departing bum and legs. Outside, I just turned to my Dad.

"Well Mark, how did I do?"

He looked at me with an obvious expression of enormous relief.

"I don't want to ever go through anything like that again, Joseph."

"Josie."

"What?"

"Josie. You'd better call me Josie when I'm dressed like this, just in case anyone hears."

"Oh, OK"

"Well I thought I did pretty well," I said as we drove back home. "I'm sure Mr Franks didn't imagine anything like what was actually happening. As far as he's concerned I am your wife."

"I just hope you're right."

While I was elated at the events of the latter part of our outing, Dad was clearly distressed. Which is a great shame really. The first hour or so, the getting there and the meal and so on, had all gone so well. It was just the surprising meeting with his boss which had upset the apple cart as far as he was concerned.

"Mr Franks said he thinks you're in with a good chance, the promotion, I mean."

"Did he? Did he say that? I didn't think he wanted me for it really. What else did he say?"

"Not much, just that really, it just came up a bit while we were chatting. It was him who actually raised the subject."

"Wow. Maybe I really do have a chance then."

And that seemed to cheer Dad up a little. I got out of the car when we got back and opened the front door.

"Shall I put the kettle on, Mark darling? Did you like that, at the end, I thought it was a nice touch."

Dad grinned at the recollection.

"Yes, Joseph, I mean Josie, that was a good idea. Sounded very convincing."

"I'm sorry about the cigarette and the drink, I know you don't really approve. But they seemed like good ideas too."

"In the circumstances I think you can be excused, Josie. But don't bother with the kettle yet. I need another proper drink after that."

"OK. Whisky and soda? I'll get it for you. You sit down and relax."

So I got Dad a drink and got myself a tonic water - with just a little gin in it. And I sat in the big chair opposite Dad and looked across towards him as we chatted about the events of the evening. Eventually bedtime came round. As we got up, locked the doors, cleared things away ready to retire I knew there was something I had to say.

"Dad, I'm really sorry about the mix-up earlier, and the clothes and all that. But I enjoyed myself, and the meal was OK. Thanks so much."

And I put my arms around his neck and kissed him lightly on the cheek.

"Thanks again, Mark darling."

And I kissed him - very gently - on the lips. That first time, the sensation of my own smooth lips sliding against his, the feeling of satisfaction I felt was so complete, so good, I remember it to this day. It had been a different sort of evening, sure, but one to remember.

"Josie, you shouldn't be doing this."

At least that's what he said, as HE kissed ME. Just the once but, like they say, with feeling. He stepped back, clearly embarrassed. I just smiled and took myself off to bed.

The next day I was up and dressed a bit late. I just dressed in my usual male stuff that is. I'd spent quite some time the previous evening carefully dismantling my 'female persona', by which I mean taking off my false nails and the breast-forms, and hanging up Mum's clothes though I had put them in my wardrobe so as not to disturb Dad. We did mention the evening's events briefly in passing though Dad was mainly just concerned his boss hadn't spotted anything untoward. He never even mentioned THAT kiss - he was probably too embarrassed and in a way I was too.

Dad didn't see Mr Franks in the office on the Monday, apparently his boss was off visiting the Coventry branch. So it was Tuesday evening, after I got back a bit late from college, before Dad was able to say anything. And he was relieved.

"It looks like you got away with it, Joseph. Neil Franks saw me this morning, he was very flattering indeed. He told me how lucky I am to have such a gorgeous wife, stuff like that. He doesn't suspect at all."

"Well that's one thing off your mind then. So you haven't told people at work, about Mum that is. You didn't tell them that she's left and all that?"

"No I haven't. It just hasn't come up and it's not the sort of thing any man is proud of. I suppose I'll have to wait a bit now though."

"Good idea, Dad, at least until after your interview. I mean, it shouldn't matter, you being a single parent as it were now and so on but you never know."

"Maybe you're right, Joseph. But anyway Neil did say one other thing. He wants me to go over to Ipswich tomorrow, some problems with one of the staff over there. I just wonder, he's never asked me to do anything like this before. Whether it's some sort of try-out, you know, for the Regional Manager post maybe?"

"It does sound a bit like that Dad. But that's a good thing isn't it?"

"Yes it is. But it means I'll have to stay over there, get back Thursday afternoon maybe. Will you be OK on your own?"

"Of course I will, Dad. No problem."

"Well it's just for one night, Joseph. I'd better read up though, have a look at the figures for the Ipswich office tonight so I'm prepared. The interviews are on Friday afternoon and I know now I've made the shortlist. So, a busy week."

"I hope it all goes OK, Dad."

Which of course I did. Dad deserved a promotion. He'd been with the company for years and of course, inevitably the extra money would be useful. The next morning Dad was off a little later than usual since he didn't have to actually go into the office. And when I got back in from college there were two messages on the answer-phone.

'Hi Joseph. Dad here, just to let you know I got here OK. Look after yourself tonight.'

And the second message.

"Hello there. Josie? Neil Franks here. I was just wondering, I know Mark's in Ipswich this evening Well, my wife is away at her mother's. So if we're both going to be home alone how about getting together for a drink or two maybe? Give me a call if you'd like to. Bye.'

Hell! What on earth should I do? Just not reply? That seemed possible, I mean I might not have got the messages. But Mr Franks had called 'Josie'. My mother. Well, no, me actually, but me as my mother. I'd better reply at least. Well maybe I could get dressed up and go out, a bit later, it was almost the end of the term and I didn't have any college work at all that evening. What would Dad want me to do?

On the one hand he certainly wouldn't be happy about me dressing up and going out. Yet on the other it was only a couple of days to Dad's interview, he wouldn't want Mr Franks to feel he'd let him down. Or rather that I had. Josie, that is. I dialled his number and tried to adapt my voice a little as I had done quite successfully the previous weekend.

"Er - hell, Mr Franks? Josie Jackson here .... Yes I did .... No, nothing really, just going to do a few things at home on my own .... Yes .... OK then...... Right, see you then."

I put the phone down. I breathed in, heavily. What the hell had I just agreed to? I looked at the clock. I had an hour and a half. Before my 'date', with Neil Franks. Dad's boss. And his wife was away for the night. The significance of that comment hadn't escaped me.

'While the cat's away...'

Surely not.

It had taken me well over two hours altogether that first time to complete my changeover from man to woman. But that had been the very first proper time, not counting the other two when I just went part-way. I had to do this in half an hour less but I was sure I could do it, and I did. Just a few minutes before Mr Franks was due to arrive to pick me up I was stepping carefully down the stairs, yet again having spent several minutes closely inspecting myself in the long mirror in my parents' bedroom.

Inspecting the tight mini-skirt I was wearing, one of Mum's very best I think, certainly the one she'd worn when she had wanted to excite Dad. Looking closely at the top I'd chosen, black and flimsy and low-cut over my 'boobs'. Peering at my make-up for flaws, done very similarly to last time but just a bit more extravagantly. And looking even more closely at my legs, sheer black stockings this time which were just about covered by my skirt, and at my very high-heeled stilettos.

I really was 'dressed to the hilt'. OK, if the mouse wanted to play, he'd find a willing playmate in me. I had to, I knew that. The tone of Mr Franks's comments when I'd spoken to him, rather than the actual words he used, gave it away. So to whatever extent I was able, I was going to play. I may have been young and naïve then, but not that young or that naïve. I knew what Mr Franks wanted. He wasn't going to get -- THAT. But .....

As soon as I saw his car pull up I was out of the door as quickly as I could. Not that I was worried about any of the neighbours recognising me as a dressed-up male, rather that I didn't want them to see my mother going out with another man. Even though that was precisely what she had done. I slid into the passenger seat and smiled across at my 'date'. I'd thought in advance exactly what to say at that moment, whether I should say 'Mr Franks' but I'd decided that was too obviously formal.

"Hello Neil," I said, smiling widely. "Let's get this right - Gwen is away for the night isn't she? Not just for the evening?"

"That's right," Neil replied.

Then he realised the significance of what I'd just asked. What with that comment, and the large expanse of nylon-clad thigh I was revealing, and my very prominent boobs - I'm afraid I was a bit obvious.

"OK come on then, I'm thirsty. Where are you taking me?"

In fact it was to a pub I'd never been in before, quite some way away. Almost certainly he didn't want to risk being seen out with 'Josie' in case the word got back to Gwen. And while we were out I was a little less obvious, just teasing him a little by stroking his hand in the pub and placing it on my thigh and a couple of other things like that. But it was when we got back into the car at the end of the evening that things began to heat up.

"Your place or mine? For coffee I mean, of course."

I smiled at him.

"Mine I think. Just for coffee of course."

But he knew damn well I had something else in mind though I don't think he could have imagined exactly what.

It was dark by then so I was less worried about the neighbours, not that we knew any of them really well by then that is. But I allowed Neil to slide a hand across my bum when we headed towards the front door. As we went in he tried to grab me but I pushed him away.

"Now, now, Neil. I need to get the coffee. You go in and sit down."

As I went into the living room a few minutes later with the coffees, my guest was sitting on the big couch, looking nervous - but excited. I handed one mug to him. So far I'd really been teasing him, half-way between promising something could happen later and just going out for a social drink. I sat next to him for a minute, then got up and lit myself a cigarette. I really did have to re-emphasise the fact that I was quite a bit older than I really was.

"So, Neil. Mark is away in Ipswich. He thinks it's something to do with the interview on Friday. Is it?"

"Well, I'm not sure I should say."

"OH, come on, Neil darling, you can tell me."

Suddenly he was nervous. I think I'd moved quite quickly, surprised him.

"Er - yes, it is really. He's in with a good chance I think."

I put down the cigarette and sipped my coffee again, then put the mug down and moved over to sit beside him. I'd known from the start something like this could happen, I just had to be careful. I reached up to move a little of his hair away from his forehead.

"Good," I said, as I moved in closer and touched my red lips to his very gently. "I really wish there was something I could do to help him, you know, to try to make sure he gets the job."

And I kissed him again, harder this time, sliding my tongue over his lips as I moved one of my hands inside his shirt to stroke his chest.

"Christ, Josie," was all he said before grabbing me hard and pulling me towards him.

Our kissing continued and became more passionate.

I broke the clinch and sat back, continuing to undo the buttons on his shirt and to caress his body.

"Neil, darling. Let's stop pretending. We both know why you're here. So if I have sex with you, you will promise me that Mark will get the job. OK?"

And with that I undid the buttons in the front of my blouse and slipped it off. Then, carefully, VERY carefully so as to keep my panties tight against my crotch and my 'secret' well and truly tucked away, I stood and undid my belt and pulled down the zip, allowing my skirt to fall to the floor.

"You like what you see, Neil?"

"Oh YES!"

"And if we fuck, you promise me Mark will get the job?"

I knew damn well that was a dangerous question. If he answered honestly I had a get-out, if he lied in the passion of the moment I was stuck.

"Well I'm chair of the committee, Josie. The rest of the team will be influenced by what I say but there's no guarantee."

Yes! Exactly what I wanted to hear. I sat back, looking just a little disappointed. Then I reached down and slowly undid the belt of Neil's trousers and pulled the zip down. I reached in and freed - my very first erect cock.

I'd wondered how I might react if that situation occurred. Having had no more than slight gay tendencies prior to that, seeing things in the showers at college and so on but never actually being involved in any way, I had thought about what my reaction might be. I looked at - IT. The erect, slightly throbbing erection which faced me.

And my first thought was - I've done that. Wow. The hardness, the length, the throbbing, they were all reactions to the presence of a woman dressed in seductive lingerie. Me. And my second reaction was - it's beautiful. The shape, the life in it, the slight quavering movement, they combined to produce such a thing of beauty. From that very first moment, I loved it.

It surprised me. I was pretty ignorant of such things at the time of course. I'd only ever seen one erect penis at the time and you know which one that was. Not that I've seen a great number since. Three, actually. But that one, Neil's, my first 'other' one was really not as I'd expected. I really did think it would be thicker. I mean, it was long, probably quite a bit longer than my own when fully erect, but really quite thin. I just didn't know at the time what effect a woman could really have on a man's cock though I was in fact about to find out.