Jelly Bean Theif

"But he is cute," Penny offered.

"And gay," Elise smiled.

"The cutest ones always are," Alida said.

"Well, thank God I'm butt ugly, huh?" Ryan said, kissing her.

"Oh, no, Honey, you're almost cute enough to be gay," Alida assured him.

"Gee thanks, got that going for me if this doesn't work out," Ryan said.

While Eric was in the bathroom, changing into regular clothes, Alida was on the telephone, making arrangements to come to the Betsingal house for the money.

"Yeah, my boyfriend Ryan's Coming with me; says since y'all are the shit for brains mother fuckers raised Carl to beat up on women, he don't trust y'all not to hit on me too, okay, cock sucker?" Alida sneered into the telephone.

"That's fine; he can wait in the car," John snapped, angered by her language.

"Bull fucking shit!" Alida snorted. "Like he's going to let me just walk into your house unescorted; y'all are some dangerous ass holes."

"Fine, fine," John snapped.

"Fine, see y'all in about fifteen minutes; bye," Alida said and hung up.

"Come on, 'Ryan Honey,'" Alida said, batting her eyes at Eric, grabbing his hand. "If we get there early, we'll just have to sit out in the car and make out."

"Stop it, just stop it," Ryan laughed, picking her up and biting the back of her neck.

"Abuse! Abuse! Y'all seen that? He bit me! I want him arrested!" Alida cried out.

"I didn't see anything. You?" Eric asked Elise, smiling.

"Nope, sorry, wasn't looking," Elise smiled.

"Please, please be careful," Ryan whispered to her, kissing her.

"Love you," Alida said, pulling Eric to the door. "We'll take my car."

"Oh, hey, I've always wanted to drive one of those, can I?" Eric asked as they approached her mini-cooper.

Elise followed in the cruiser, parking down the street, well out of sight of the Betsingal house.

"And Showtime," Eric said.

"So, how you like it?" Alida asked, indicating the car.

"Oh, it's fun, but I think Lawrence would shit if I got rid of the truck," Eric said.

"He's a size queen," Eric continued as he looked back at the car. "Likes big trucks and big cocks."

"Um, thanks for sharing," Alida said.

"No problem," Eric laughed as Alida knocked on the large wooden door, hard.

"All right, no, I'm not here to have tea and a chat," Alida spat when John opened the door and started to talk. "You give me the money and I go tell the cops I don't want to press charges, right?"

"Really, do you have to be so rude?" Corrine sniffed.

"Hi douche bag, God, better hurry up and make that appointment with a plastic surgeon; you're really starting to look hagged out there," Alida cheerfully greeted Corrine.

Eric couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, getting a divorce from these ass holes was the best fucking idea you ever had, Ryan," Alida said as they stepped into the living room. "Finally, I can tell these stuck up cunts what I really think of them."

"Well, can take the girl out of the trailer park, but can't take the trailer park out of the girl," Corrine sniffed.

"Yeah, so what's your excuse for being such a hateful bag of shit?" Alida asked as John came marching back into the room, holding out a cashier's check.

"Here, now go have those charges dropped," John demanded, slapping the check into Alida's outstretched hand.

"And Showtime," Eric said. "John Betsingal, you're under arrest..."

Alida went and opened the door for Elise and smiled at the shocked faces of her in-laws.

"Yeah, can take the girl out of the trailer park," she smiled as Elise read Corrine her rights.

"You are dead, you hear me?" John hissed hatefully at Alida.

"You heard that? He threatened me," Alida asked Eric.

"Yes ma'am, I did," Eric said, all laughter gone.

"John, for once in your life, shut up," Corrine said, finally grasping the reality of their situation. "We'll call Sophia and let her handle this."

Epilogue

Alida woke Ryan up at three forty two AM, February 14, 2014.

"Baby, oh God!" she cried out as a contraction tore at her.

"Oh, boy!" Ryan said cheerfully. "Patsy's coming?"

"Yeah, I think so," Alida whimpered.

He gave her a quick kiss on her sweaty forehead, wiggled out of the bed and grabbed her sweatpants and sweatshirt.

"Purple? Remind me again why you bought purple?" Ryan asked as he eased the sweatpants over her pudgy legs.

"They were out of black in my size," she panted as another contraction began.

"Oh God!" she cried out. "Oh God, hurry!"

"Okay, and here's our fuzzy socks; almost makes me wish these came in guys too," Ryan said.

"You are such a goof, you know that?" Alida giggled, now that the contraction had passed.

They waddled down the hall and out the front door.

"Oh, shit, shit shit!" Alida chanted as another contraction hit and she almost doubled over in agony.

Suddenly Her water broke and she shrieked in terror.

Want me go get you some dry pants?" Ryan asked.

"Want you to get me to the fucking hospital! Now! Fuck the dry pants!" Alida screamed, terrified.

He drove to the Trauma Center, chattering pleasantly with her, despite her cries and occasional stream of obscenities.

"And we're here," Ryan said as he pulled up to the Emergency Room entrance.

"First baby; she's a little upset," Ryan told the nurse and orderly that raced out to meet them.

"It'll be okay, Honey," the nurse soothed.

"Ryan? Where's Ryan?" Alida whimpered as they hurried her to the elevator.

Ryan parked the truck and jogged to the Emergency Room entrance. A tired nurse directed him to the elevator and told him, "Second floor, north wing."

"Alida Betsingal?" Ryan asked the nurse at the desk of the maternity ward.

"No," the woman said, shaking her head as she looked at the computer screen.

"Oh, I bet it's under Irvine?" Ryan asked.

"No," the woman said, still shaking her head.

"Come on; she was brought in just a couple of minutes ago!" Ryan said. "Purple sweats?"

"You mean, Alida Thibodeaux?" the nurse asked, then realized she'd released patient information that may have been restricted and clamped her hand over her mouth in horror.

"Sir, we're in this room," another nurse said, smiling as she approached. "Come on; she's asking for you."

The nurse helped Ryan scrub up, then led him into the room where a sweating, whining Alida lay.

"Hi, Sweetheart," Ryan said.

"Oh thank God," Alida sobbed out and clung to him.

"I'm right here," Ryan whispered, soothing her.

Patricia 'Patsy' Faye Thibodeaux was born at 10:19 AM on Valentine's Day. She was a Daddy's Girl the moment her brown eyes looked into his brown eyes. She had all ten fingers and all ten toes, a small little nose, dainty little ears, a good mop of brown hair, and very loud voice.

Ryan's mother, Sylvia Morgan, was not happy to hear that she was now a grandmother. She denied it vehemently and even told Ronald Morgan, her husband that Ryan was in fact a foster child, not her actual son.

"I mean, really, darling, I'm thirty seven!" she giggled, flinging her bright red hair back. "How in God's name would I have a twenty seven year old son?"

"Same way you have that red hair and a dark brown bush," her husband muttered to himself.

Scott and Jasmine, Ryan's father an stepmother clamored for all the baby pictures Ryan could send the and sent Ryan and Alida several pictures of Patsy's two aunts and one uncle.

Scott also slipped in a photo of Jasmine, eight month pregnant belly clearly visible in her bikini.

"And they said we can go there for our Honeymoon," Ryan said, showing Alida a picture of his father's Fort Lauderdale home.

Oh!" Alida gasped.

She began an aggressive campaign to lose the baby weight and get herself into bikini shape. She cursed Ryan for getting her addicted to jelly beans and strawberry malts. Woe to him, though, if he put the jellybeans out of reach, or did not come home with a large strawberry malt from Clark's whenever he left the home.

Alida's divorce from Carl was finalized sixty three days after Patsy's birth. The civil trial was scheduled for a week later, but Carl agreed to a plea bargain that would have him serving the majority of his three year sentence in Slidell's Central Lockup, doing his residency in the prison hospital.

John Betsingal, because of his threats against Alida, was given a six month sentence. Corinne likewise received a six month sentence, suspended.

Corinne put a second mortgage on their home, emptied their bank accounts and disappeared; a direct violation of the terms of her suspended six month sentence. John had no choice but file for divorce and bankruptcy upon his release.

On a hot Sunday in July, Scott and Ryan Thibodeaux sat underneath a large umbrella, each holding their infant daughter. Alida and Jasmine squealed and ran out into the waves that crashed onto the beach.

Next to Ryan, Polly Thibodeaux, Ryan's four year old sister sat and fussed over Patsy. Polly had decided that she loved Patsy much more than she loved her newest sister Abigail because Patsy didn't cry as much as her sister Abigail.

At their feet, safe and sound in their playpen was Sarah and Samuel Thibodeaux.

"I swear! I hate you!" Jasmine laughed as Alida body surfed on a small wave.

"What? Why?" Alida laughed.

"I swear to God, I just can't get rid of this baby fat!" Jasmine whined.

"Shut up; you're fucking gorgeous," Alida protested.

From behind a sand dune, Corinne Betsingal stared hatefully at the Thibodeaux family.

THE END.

I write these stories for my pleasure; I post them here for your enjoyment.
Thank you for reading my stories.
Yes I need an editor.
Yes it jumped around too much.
Yes there were too many people to keep track of.
Yes it's too long.
Yes this was stupid shit.
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Yes I suck.
Have a nice day.