Journey of Submission Ch. 01byliisbeth©
i sit waiting in the lobby for Him to retrieve me trying to casually read the coffee table book about the history of Denver. What was i thinking driving to Denver to meet a man i had met via the internet and only knew through our e-mails correspondence. There was a connection that existed between us as though long lost lovers who had been torn apart to live separate lives were brought back together. It was so unexpected i wasn't even expecting Him to ever respond to the e-mail that i sent Him it was just two words "interesting interests" let alone that i would now be sitting in the lobby of his building waiting for Him to retrieve me.
As i try to focus on the book i find myself reminiscing about the correspondences and phone conversations that have led up to this moment. Initially they were just innocuous philosophical discussion regarding the dynamics between Dominants and submissive. Discussing the gift of submission given and the responsibility of the Dom. i had previous experiences and so many men think it is a weakness that they can exploit. He was very different it recognized the strength and power necessary to surrender your body, mind and spirit to another. The level of honor He felt and respect He had when a woman was willing to surrender herself to Him was astounding to me. He was unique in the sincerity in which He expressed His sentiments regarding the D/s relationship.
It was obvious as W/we responded back and forth to the e-mails that first day that there was something between U/us what neither knew but W/we would soon find out. It was ingrained in me to be submissive and i have always taken that role in any relationship i had been, in finding pleasure in caring for the man i was with. They always ended up thinking they could take advantage of my nature thinking i did these things to keep them around. They had no understanding that i found joy in caring for those around me that it was a gift and choice i made and as easily as given i could quickly take it back.
i never had any difficulty walking away from these relationships i never gave myself to any of these men. i always though showed them enough of what they could have and afforded them the opportunity to recognize the beauty in it or to show their true colors and take it for granted. i have always expected the second to happen hoping for the first. Each time though i had no difficulty walking away with out shedding a single tear. Though for them it was never so simple to late they would realize their error and i would be gone.
He was different His degree of understanding and respect for submission was astounding. He viewed submissive women as beautiful powerful creatures that should be honored and loved. He took His role as Dom seriously and that it was His duty to create a safe healing environment for her to blossom and grow in. There was no pretense in His correspondence and W/we grew in trust and understanding with each other through each response.
As O/our communications continued and W/we explored each others desires and interests i found myself performing tasks for Him that i never thought i would do for any man, he had awoken a part of me i thought was shut off forever. A part that i thought had been destroyed no matter how hard i had tried to open it back up i could never expose that part of me to any man who had come into my life. It didn't matter how sweet they were or how nice they had been, i always knew that one day i would walk away from them without shedding a single tear. i didn't believe that i could ever give myself to a man so that it mattered whether they were there or not till now.
i looked up as he began to cross the lobby floor and i could barely breathe at the sight of Him as i rose to my feet to greet Him, His strong arms engulfed me He grabbed the back of my hair tilting my head back and consuming my mouth in that first kiss. i knew from that moment that this would be the man i would expose and surrender the part of me i had never given to anyone else. This would be the man i would allow to own me all of me, and i would never be able to walk away from Him cause the tears would never stop.
He escorted me to the elevator once inside He again engulfed me in His arms and pressed me up against Him so that i could feel His cock filled with desire for me as He told me how beautiful i was and whispered the ways he was going to take me. i could no longer control my breathing whether i exhaled, inhaled, or breathed at all was completely under His control. W/we entered the apartment and as He closed the door behind U/us He took me holding me out from Him and examined what He now had in his possession exploring my body with his hands through my dress. Finally reaching under my dress and between my legs insuring i was bare as He had requested and feeling the moisture that was flowing from me in response to Him.
Satisfied He handed me a glass of water and directed me to remove my clothes as He led me to the living room where laid out and ready for use were various devices He planned on using to adorn my body with His marks. First though He placed His collar around my throat and cuffs on my wrists so that all doubt as to who was my Master would now be removed. Requiring me to get on my knees He blindfolded me and than i felt the pinching as He placed a clamp on each of my nipples. i could feel the weight of the chain that ran from each clamp causing more pressure with every movement that i made, the sensation was exquisite.
Bent over a chair He placed clamps on each lip of my labia, with each new sensation moisture began to flow from me my legs began to quiver and than completely exposed and decorated with his clamps, and collars He began to decorate me with His marks. Using a leather flogger He ran it across my back and legs allowing me to feel the sensation of the leather thongs before He began to place His beautiful red welts on my bottom.
With each strike i could feel the fluid flow unabated from me as blood rushed to my clit and it swelled. my legs began to quiver and i thought i would not be able to control myself from exploding into orgasm but not yet He was not ready to allow that yet and He had control of my pleasure and pain. This was just the warm up just the beginning of His exploration of my body his testing of my will. This was just the start of the journey He wanted to take me on, the beginning of my willing submission to His control. He was showing that He knew what i needed and what i craved and that He was the one to give it to me.
Taking me in His arms He guided me to the bedroom blindfolded and completely at His mercy He laid me on the bed and began His exploration of what soon would be His. First with His touch tantalizing my clit with His fingers than inserting them inside of me. He explored and stimulated my erogenous zones thoroughly with His hands before selecting a toy from His arsenal to intensify my response. Using various devices from His collection He explored my responses to the various sensations till He finally He achieved the desired effect and cum ran uncontrollably from me flooding the bed. He had quickly discovered how to control and stimulate the most intense orgasm something that took most men several attempts to achieve. Still not finished with me He not waiting for the orgasm to subside He began again stimulating my clit with His hitachi and my g-spot with various devices till i was again unable to contain myself the intensity this time so extreme i lifted myself off the bed my legs pressed into His shoulders screaming in ecstasy as once again the cum flowed from me in a torrent. Now that there was no doubt of the Mastery He had over my body He entered me thrusting deep inside with each thrust my body responded my pelvis greeting His as He completed the process of His ownership of what now and forever would be His body. There was no turning back there could be no doubt that from this moment on i would choose to entrust my entire being to Him.
Once finished He took me into His arms holding me in His loving embrace till my body finally relaxed and the tremors subsided. As i lay in His arms He told me how honored He was for my gift to Him. How proud He was that i would be willing to submit myself to Him. How lucky He felt to have found someone like me. All i could think was how incredibly blessed i was to have finally found the Man that i would give my heart and soul to. That i would finally give my love to Him that part of me i had guarded carefully this Man i would willingly surrender my entire self to.
As i drove home i felt His marks on my bottom every movement i made generated a sting sending shivers through my body as i recalled this first encounter. Each exquisite lash upon my body and as my nipples rubbed against my clothes i could feel the lingering sting from the clamps causing my clit to swell and the wetness again began to flow from me. i could feel the moisture run onto my thighs the sensation caused me to squirm in my seat creating a vicious cycle of sensations making it difficult for me to concentrate while i was driving. i began to recollect the last few weeks leading up to this moment and the various tasks i had performed for Him to prepare myself.
His first task of me to kneel in a corner and clear my mind than bring myself to the brink of orgasm four times before finally allowing myself to cum was exquisite and i performed the task with a willingness to please Him that i had never known. i couldn't wait till He called so that i could describe the pleasure and intensity of the orgasm how fulfilling it was to allow Him such control. i had never experienced such satisfaction in finally achieving orgasm as i did at that moment knowing that i was carrying out His directions for O/our pleasure. After completing the task i took some erotic pictures of myself so He could see the effect the task had on me. Sending Him that first picture of me completely exposed for His pleasure made me nervous would He be pleased at what He saw? Would He see in my exposure the joy that completing His task had given me?
When He responded i knew that He was more than pleased. i perhaps should of warned Him to open the e-mail in private but i proved no such warning and He opened them while in a business meeting. His response via text said it all "You are beautiful" i was overcome with joy. When He called shortly after He told me that He almost came right there in the meeting viewing my naked body for the first time. i had to giggle at the picture of Him opening the e-mail up on His phone and seeing my naked body pressed up against the wall hands over my head so He could view every inch of me. Than seeing the second shot of me bent over bare unmarked bottom presented with my hands bracing myself against the wall waiting for Him to apply that first beautiful mark. He recognized in these pictures the true beauty in my submission to His will and from that moment there was no turning back. The next day the challenge of the task i was to perform was intensified He requested that i go and purchase clothespins. i drove to various stores frustrated that none of them had any clothes pins. i was frantic at the thought of not being able to perform His task. i walked into Staples remembering the metal binder clips that are used to hold large amounts of paper together. i purchased what i hope He would find acceptable as a substitute, pink metal binder clips. Now it was time to fulfill his request i began by clipping a clip on each of my nipples than around the areola of my breasts.
Initially the sensation was intense and i was unsure if i could handle the pain. Taking a deep breath i relaxed and allowing the pain to flow through me i succumbed to the sensation and i could feel my body respond to the exquisite torture of the clamps upon my breasts. Next i was to clamp each labia i placed three clamps on each side before finally placing a clamp upon my clit. The sight of my reflection in the mirror almost sent me into an uncontrollable orgasm but i managed to control myself as i had been instructed to not orgasm.
Now came the most difficult part of His task to place myself under the shower and allow cold water to run over the clamps on my breasts, labia, and clit. i despise cold water and could not imagine the sensation would be pleasurable in any fashion, my first lesson in recognizing that He was better equipped at knowing what would achieve the desired effect. The sensation of cold water pounding against the clips was exquisite and i had to force myself to leave the shower in order to complete the next stage of His assignment kneeling on the floor with my legs spread until i had completely dried off.
i felt so vulnerable and so exposed as the air interacted with the cold water and goose bumps began to form on my skin sending shivers through my body. With each shiver the clamps would shift and the pressure would increase till finally the last drop of water had evaporated from my skin and now came the moment that i was to remove the clip from my clit and bring myself to orgasm. His task completed i lay upon the floor waiting for the final tremor to subside and than i removed each clamp from my body.
i used my camera to capture each moment for him so i could share every exquisite execution of his directions. Still basking in the pleasure i received from completing His challenge i sent the photos so He could witness my experience. i couldn't wait for the moment that W/we would be able to talk and i could share with Him the sensations i experienced. i craved and needed to hear Him achieve orgasm as i would relay in detail how i performed His challenge and how amazing the experience was. To hear Him cum over the phone was the ultimate reward to know that He was pleased with my willingness to follow His directions. With each task my hunger and desire for Him grew and i knew that O/our first physical encounter would be exquisite He already knew me so well.
As i drove the last few miles i was able to reflect on His last challenge for me, prior to O/our meeting, to place clamps on each tender nipple and on my labia and clit than dress myself and go out and walk about in a public place. i was excited and nervous at the prospect of walking about publicly with clamps on under my clothes. i began to prepare myself for the task taking a long hot bath to relax myself and calm my nerves i put on the clamps. Being such an over achiever i selected a tight fitting lace bra to wear and than a tight jersey top both of which would rub and move against the clamps with every motion, finally i selected a pair of short snug fitting jean shorts to wear and off i went. Not a movement i could make or a breath i could take that wouldn't cause the fabric to rub and pull on the clamps.
i had to take the dogs out though for a quick walk before i went off to the mall. As i was walking the dogs i became so stimulated from sensations that the clamps were causing that i loosened my grip on one of the leashes giving the dog the opportunity to break free causing me to have to run till i caught the little bastard. It took several minutes to recover from the experience at first the pain was so intense i didn't think i would be able to handle it than something changed in the sensation and once i had sat down to recover my head was spinning and i had know idea what was happening. Warmth enveloped my entire body and it felt as though i was part of everything ether that flowed into and out of the universe. All the sensations around me increased the joy the songs of the bird, the air on my skin, the panting of the dogs it was nirvana.
Pulling myself back to reality i returned the dogs home and headed off to the mall walking about and grabbing an ice tea at a coffee house, i sat and drank my beverage before i went to complete the final phase of the task. Throwing my cup away i went to the restroom to remove the clamp from my clit and bring myself to orgasm. Pulling down the shorts i began to remove the clamp i almost came immediately the sensation of blood rushing into my already swollen clit and than with barely a touch my cum ran out of me.
i am now pulling into my home and send Him a quick text to let Him know i have made it safely back. He calls before i have been able to exit the vehicle and begins to tell me what an amazing experience it was for Him and how He can't wait for the next time. i am taken back by the compliments as He tells me that this was the best first experience He has ever had. i share with Him how amazing it was for me and that it was also the best first experience i had ever had. W/we share back and forth with each other the excitement and pleasure from the experience and begin to make plans for O/our next encounter.
i am unsure of what to think during this week the feelings and emotions that run through me as i recall the last few weeks and my first encounter with Him. The tasks i have performed for Him my willingness to follow His directions so as to please Him. Always i find solace and pleasure in so doing. i know that i am His to own and even though the battle rages inside of me to proceed with caution.
He is out of town on business and though i wish i could just lie in His arms exhausted from His ordeals. All that i can do is wait for His return and each night enjoy those moments before W/we go to sleep of sharing with Him an orgasm over the phone. i so enjoy hearing his pleasure as He explodes thru the phone. my desire to please Him and help ease any difficulties of His day continues to increase. He is such a giving and loving man to everyone in His life always placing others needs before His own. Doing all within His power to insure their happiness and well being this part of His nature makes my desire to be the one who serves His needs and bring Him joy even greater.
The more i discover about Him through these conversations the more i find myself giving myself to Him. With each new revelation of His personality i realize what a true gift it is to become the person that He can seek solace and comfort in. The person willing to serve and care for Him as He is willing to serve and care for those He loves in His life. i almost feel guilty sharing with Him any difficulty from my past that i have had, though i know He wishes to know all of me, He carries so many burdens that i have no desire to cause Him any discomfort.
O/our conversations while He is away are very enlightening for me so that upon His return i will be better at anticipating His needs and desires. i so love hearing Him on the other line asking "How is My pet today" each time it sends shivers through my soul and increases my desire for Him. His willingness to accept my nature so openly is such a comfort He sees the strength in my nature.
Unlike so many others i have known they see this nature as a weakness they think i am an easy target that will do as they please with a smile on my face. They all seemed to forget that there is no weakness in my nature and their treating it as such caused them to never win my heart. i have never given my heart to any man though many tried to capture it i never found the man who would recognize the gift i had saved. i decided as a young child that this piece of me nobody could take, this part of me was mine to give.
Is this the man? This question has never entered my consciousness before i have no doubt to the answer even though the fear of such a thought causes me to want to run, for this man i will face my biggest fear. i know that what will bring Him the most pleasure and joy is my willingness to surrender my entire self to His care. i know that with this surrender i can bring Him joy. Now the biggest fear of all what if He doesn't want me what if i am wrong? i have made my decision though i won't hold back i will embrace this with all i have. His choice is for Him to make and mine for me and i choose to submit.