Katie's Diary Ch. 03

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Mr. P begins search to reconnect with lover.
4.5k words
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Part 3 of the 3 part series

Updated 09/22/2022
Created 08/26/2005
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Chapter 3: Katie's still in me

Katie and I sat on the bed for a short period after having sex. I was mesmerized by her supple beauty. There wasn't anything this beautiful young woman should change, which in my opinion, was necessary.

"Katie, you are insatiable! I wish I could do this with you day in and day out! I'd do it right now if of it was feasible."

"Sure... It is feasible, let's do it again, right now! Come on, I will do this again", she exclaimed with a wide-eyed smile on her face!

"Oh sure, you have all the energy and stamina in the world; me on the other hand, I'd be walking home almost bull legged if you and I did it as often as you wanted."

Just then, Katie looked at me and said, "Listen, Mr. P., everything I wrote in my diary about you, I honestly believe. I think I could do it with you all the time"

I took her hands, held them for a few moments and said, "Katie sweetheart, you are one in a million! One of the finest and sexiest women I've ever had the pleasure to be with! I don't, however see any way I can continue having a relationship. This isn't normal and it isn't fair to you or anyone else in our lives in the long run."

"But Mr. P. why can't we be lovers, you love me don't you? You do love me, right?"

"Katie, I will always, 'love' you in a manner of speaking. But I love many people in many different ways. I wish I could explain how I love you, with out you becoming hurt."

"Don't you love my body, she asked. Don't you love my personality and attitude?"

"Ohhh Katie, I think you are beautiful, sexy, lovely, and adorable and more! I want to keep you, make love with you all the time. I just can't. I can't. We have to end this and we can't continue this infatuation."

"Infatuation, she queried me, I am not infatuated with you. I am completely and utterly crazy about you and I find you attractive too."

She lunged at me and started kissing me. I let her and I let myself kiss her back repeatedly. She kissed like a mad woman! She swallowed me up! Pulling at my lips and groping my body. Her tits smashed against me! Her hands ran through my hair. Her soft fingers absorbed me as they tantalized my head. I got horny again!

I didn't want to stop. I couldn't find my will power. Oh my god, she kissed brutally. She had a fervent manner about her! "Ohhh, Dave, Dave, stop her!" I couldn't, but I wanted to. I had to. I must!

Finally, I ushered all the will power and pushed Katie back. I looked at her, holding her body. She was confused!

"Why, Mr. P., why do you want to stop?"

"Katie, I never ever want to stop, but I have to. I never ever want not to kiss you. Please understand, you mean a lot to me. But we have to end this. We do. That's final honey!"

"It isn't and I won't. Even if I email or write of us, you will know my feelings, Mr. P. I know that. I do."

So she didn't. She continued to tantalize me. She was exacting in her pursuit over a year's time. She emailed me with journal entries and pics she'd email me and little movies she make showing how she'd fondle herself, for me. It was arousing to say the least and torturous! I wanted to be there in that room with her! I wanted to be inside of her thighs! I wanted to eat her out. I wanted to put myself in side of her! I wanted to tell her this and more. She had me almost... almost, she had me... but I couldn't succumb!

I used my wife as that surrogate! I'd make passionate love with her. I'd become more romantically aggressive with her, imagining that it was Katie and me! I never cried out Katie's name, but my mind focused on Katie's snatch or tits, depending on what my wife would do while 'making love'!

She and I had the most incredible foreplay as time went on. I researched different techniques that would be acceptable to my wife without being too over the top. There wasn't too much she and I would not consider, within reason.

Finding new erogenous zones was beneficial, in the end. My wife and I re-discovered each other intimately. We found what really might turn the other on. She and I learned to take a day together, slower and slower. I'd romance her. We'd sit and drink wine. We'd talk about what's happening with us. Eventually, the emails and voice mails from Katie were precious, but unnecessary. I didn't crave her lusting attention. I responded less and less.

Even a journal online that Katie began that she only kept for me seemed less important. I never responded and I didn't find it as important. Granted, she could still come back to haunt me and ruin me. She could crush me, if she was vindictive! Katie was not that way. Eventually we grew apart. Maybe not emotionally, but due to time, we did... for now.

My wife and I would go to our bedroom and lay in bed, and we would speak softly to one another, rekindling a hidden passion we didn't realize was slipping away. We made love often, but we didn't recognize that the romantic portion was gone and we had sex for sex purposes only. While speaking to my wife romantically, she and I began to notice the little things we took for granted that heightened an easier arousal and orgasm for the both of us. Just sitting and watching out the window while on our bed, we watched the branches of a tree and noticing how they swayed in the wind. Far enough away from the window that no one could see us, we took delight in the simple things that relaxed us.

Upon sitting there, I'd slowly undress her. Unbuttoning one button at a time, I'd undo all the way down until I completed my 'task'. None of this was a task though, it became a pleasure, to say the very least.

She and I'd sit up again the headboard. Slipping off her top, she'd turn her head in approval with a nice relaxed smile on her face. Nothing sexually aggressive at that point, it was nice easy intimate foreplay.

Pulling her against me as I supported myself against our headboard, we'd watch the suns rays outside, hopefully or the rain and I'd stir up her frontal area. Caressing her stomach, her breasts, and her sides gently, I never wanted to be too aggressive. We wanted to take our time.

I loved her breasts. I loved almost any woman's breasts, for that matter. I forgot how incredible hers were. I overlooked how wonderful her nipples were. These were gigantic, when aroused. I wanted to tease for hours, but the nipple only takes so much 'pain' over time. She'd love it for a several minutes. She loved my tongue too, but it would tingle almost painfully after several minutes.

Eventually she and I discovered various positions to do foreplay. Those various positions led to different ideas for fucking. Since my wife had her tubes tied, that wasn't an issue any longer. I discovered a handful of new things to utilize while having sex with her.

I always wanted her on top, like I wanted Katie, but she wanted me on top. It was a dilemma. Who gets their way? She did. She wanted me on top, in control, and that's the way I let her have it.

Fucking directly over her, fucking behind her, fucking sideways, fucking upside down... each was fun and some was new; either way making love with my wife was great.

Licking her out was fun. She'd learn to shave her garden. She and I learned to shave her together and not just her vaginal area. She'd let me shave her legs even and I let her shave my face. We talked about me shaving my groin. I didn't have the 'balls' to do it at that point.

It was our way of reconnecting. It worked well. Our kids, over time, grew tired of their existence here and moved out. Each secured new jobs and good places. David secured a position as a purchasing agent for a well-known retailer.

Jenn became an administrative assistant for a large law firm. She moved in with two other girls from the firm. I didn't know them. She dated a man from the firm who was the manager of the mailroom. He was six years older then her, which bothered me.

As for Katie, I didn't stay in touch. She kept me on her email list. She didn't stop sending me occasional emails, naughty ones in fact, but she didn't do it as frequently. I suppose with her new job, her priorities may have changed. I asked Jenn about her in general terms, but they had grown apart. I didn't email Katie.

My wife and I redeveloped our love, not that we weren't out of love, but we... or I became much more in tune with where our true interests should be.

She and I went on dates, we'd hold hands, and we'd kiss in the car, prior to getting out and going inside somewhere. I'd even get childish and try to cop a feel as if we were kids again. I was allowed to do that. She'd rub my crotch, trying to get a hard on out of me. I'd joke with her saying she'd have to bend over, unzip me, and give me head. Eventually I think I could get her to that point in the car.

As two people in our early forties, I think she and I had a good thing going on. We tried our hardest to leave any serious stuff out of this new romantic relationship we rediscovered.

Jenn stopped in one Saturday morning, early in fact. It was 7:30am. My wife and I were spooning. I had opened the curtains so she and I could enjoy the morning sun come in. It was very soothing. Wearing nothing but underwear, neither of us made a pot of coffee. My arms wrapped around her, she let me touch away here and there.

I tried to tickle her sides a little in some quiet play. She'd reach back, attempting to get at my limpness. I maneuvered her body some, so she could attach her hand to it. Once grabbing on, I finally had her turn towards me so she could, if she cared to, just jack it off.

Instead, I was surprised by her desire to slide down to the foot of our bed and taste me. I said, "Wouldn't that be better, if it was cleaned and prepared first?"

We laughed and she said, "Nahhh, that's okay, I'll take my chances" and slipped my completely limp piece inside. She didn't do anything except suck on it gingerly as if it was a Tootsie Roll Pop.

"So how many licks does it take to get to the center of my pop, honey?"

With a mouthful of cock, limp as it was, she couldn't answer clearly, but she mumbled something with a half ass smile. She pulled herself off and replied, "Listen, I'm horny and if I'm going to get proper treatment, then let me do what needs to be done."

Now remember, Jenn had come and we didn't hear her car or the door. We were upstairs and our door was open since no one lived with us any longer. She may have called out our names, but with us talking ear to ear, she and I didn't hear Jenn.

Jenn walked upstairs as she normally does and didn't hear us. She walked down the hallway and I thought I heard something. But my wife had just mounted me in reverse so that I could lick her out and she could suck me off also.

Surpriiiise... this voice sounded out. "Ohh... mommm... dadddd... ewwww! Why didn't you close the door?"

She saw us going at one another. She saw my cock hanging out of her mom's mouth! She saw me initializing a muff dive on her mom. She didn't even think that we still did it with one another. She turned briskly and walked back down the hallway and down the stairs.

"Well sweetheart, once again you've grossed out your daughter", my wife said half jokingly.

"Me, I've grossed out my daughter? How about, we have grossed out our daughter."

We dressed and went downstairs. She and I laughed but composed ourselves as Jenn sat at the kitchen table trying to compose her self also. She looked up. She was visibly upset "Do you two have it out for me to become grossed out? Oh my god, how many times do I hafta see my dad...you know... eckkk!"

"Sorry Jenn, I said. I am very sorry. But your mother and I do have all the right in the world to enjoy one another and express it any time we want to!"

"Eccckkk daddy, I don't want to hear it, please! It's grosssss! I don't wanna know about you and mom!"

"Jenn honey, said her mom, you need to grow up! You just need to grow up. You and I are going to talk. But don't tell me you haven't ever thought about whatever and us. Don't tell me you haven't been to a party or somewhere else and seen a guy's penis. I am sure you've seen guys or older men and jewels, right Jenn?"

"Mom, ewww, stop that; I don't care to discuss that with you! Jenn turned quickly, walked out of the room, went, and collected some items from her old room.

My wife and I looked at each other. We were amused but empathetic as well. We knew how she felt. We had been there with our parents to some degree. I remember seeing my mom and dad naked when I was 19 while hanging out in the back yard with friends.

I remember it well. My parents thought we were getting ready to leave, but instead, we hung out in the back yard and went swimming. My friends decided they weren't ready to leave. So we all lounged by the pool. We began playing a game. Then I took off my clothes, except my boxers.

My parents became playful, went upstairs, and began getting it on and thinking we left. The door wasn't closed all the way. If you walked past their room, you could get to my room.

An old friend, Aaron Jones, wanted something that was in my room. I went up to get it out of my closet. Going into the house, I didn't hear much of anything. Going upstairs, I heard some rustling, but paid no mind. Walking past my parent's room, which the door was half closed, I didn't pay attention at first and didn't hear much of anything anyways. I assumed nothing was going on either.

Habitually looking sideways into their room as I passed it, there was my mom freakin naked as heck on top of my dad, and banging away at him. Her tits were swaying up and down. Her head was bent backwards. Her back was arched back as well; however, she was screaming either.

"Oh my freakin God, my parents are going at it", I thought! I never ever saw them do each other before; I never ever even thought about them getting it on in any way. But now, I thought, fucking one another when I have friends around? I thought nooo not now! Have a little respect for me. That's gross too! I just shut up, kept it to myself until later, retrieved the stuff in my bedroom and went outside, disgusted.

My mom naked as a jaybird or fucking in plain sight is not attractive. It probably has the same similarity of cow dung in public... it's completely and utterly gross!

So I empathized with my daughters feelings. My wife had a similar experience, but for all practical purposes, it's not as important, the point had been made. She went and tried to console Jenn. I think this was just another learning experience for her. She seems to have received some of the more graphic one's in life as opposed to David.

Several weeks passed by and Jenn had stopped coming by at all unless she knew it was completely safe. Her feelings grew for this guy in her office. They were serious. David was doing well. My wife had expanded her interests and I began seeing weird things off and on after a couple of months.

One day I was getting prepared to take a contract I negotiated and completed to a Regional Marketing Seminar where I would meet up with our Controllers and Marketing managers. As I emailed the contract and printed it off as well, I switched from the network and pulled up my personal email.

Five new emails and all from Katie, so I made sure no one was around. My wife was upstairs in the shower. I opened each up. She had written in her journal. These weren't just any thoughts or contemplations.

These were poems. These were sophisticated poems with deep meaning to them. I was impressed! I was completely impressed. Should I respond?

Of course, she wants me to respond; she wants me to say something to her, but what does she want to hear?

"Dear Katie, these poems... these lovely, romantic poems should be saved for a man who can make your entire life meaningful. I am not able to make your life meaningful. I hope I have made it worthwhile in some instances, but others who have a more direct effect on you should help influence what you want and what you could achieve, from within yourself.

You have so many abilities that only a handful of people in this world possess. Not everyone has that determination that you own. Be rational about what you want and desire, for those choices will define or destroy what you already have.

I am not here to define your life. I am only or I was only a stepping-stone in your life. Move on and may you be blessed in your pursuits.

With deep, deep regards, Mr. P."

I left it at that. I looked and looked at my response to her and her poems. She had written all of these on her on-line journal. All were chronicled for me to know about and refer back to, if I so chose. I chose not to, although I fought with the desire to pursue my deep-seated craving to reconnect and lust for Katie. I kept all of this as buried as possible. For a while, I was successful.

I walked upstairs. My wife had just stepped in the shower. I had to leave on a flight in three hours. "Is there any room available in there", I called out.

"Haven't I offered you ore then enough lately? She was teasing and I didn't notice her signals. If you must, she continued, do I need to prime anything for you?"

I laughed to myself. She was also laughing under her breath in the shower. I walked undressed and held my cock in my hand. "Oh, just in case, I did close and lock our bedroom door."

Holding my cock in hand, she looked down and said "No, no, no... That's my job, isn't it?"

"I hope so, I chimed back, and I do hope that's your intention. It is right?"

She reached for it as I stood just outside our shower. She gave it a slight tug with out injury! I quickly stepped in and reclaimed my affinity for her. Hugging her from behind, I wrapped my arms around her and we felt our love and appreciation under the showering spray. I could hear the warm sounds from her. I would pull her tighter. She'd wrap her arms around mind, rubbing away and my arms.

Eventually, of course, I raised my hands further north. I began sliding them upwards underneath her breasts as I held them in my cupped hands. I'd let my hands shift back and forth underneath as I felt as if I was massaging them and pleasing her.

She hadn't moved while I massaged the undersides. She stood up against my front side and I began to move about the sides of her tits, and then up over the top portion. Each time, I'd feel her soft but cushiony breasts. It was as if I held on to a superb loaf of Jewish Rye bread. That kind of deli rye made bread you knew was quality bread that doesn't fall apart after it's toasted. It is the type of deli rye, which has a wonderful robust flavor to it. That's what I appreciated or tried to appreciate when making love to my wife and her breasts.

Never would I believe she's a piece of meat, or bread in this case, but she's a class act woman. She and I appreciated the other's company. I assumed and she assumed we were 100% committed to the other.

Both of us had a trump card, the other didn't know about. I had Katie, I think, if I cared to and she had a lover, infrequently, I didn't know about. I kept her grounded though. Maybe she kept me grounded too.

"It's dangerous to try and fuck in here", I said.

"Honey, who said anything about fucking in here, I think if you and I want to fuck, we should step out. Ummm anyways, can we just toy with one another in here? It is nice and romantic", she added.

She turned around. Her nipples were bursting with flavor. They were engrossed in desire. They looked like they were calling out for a partner or more. My mind said, Ill be a partner, when should we hook up?"

Reaching for me, she grabbed a hold of my cock. "You aren't getting any blow job, but I'll whack you off if you want."

Fair enough, I took what she offered. Sex is sex, sometimes. You take what's available, sometimes. She and I didn't do what I expected. She creamed me up with her cream rinse she liked to use in her hair. It had such a nice fresh scent that was captured between the walls of our shower. It brought you alive a little without the use of it.

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