Kendra's Knees Buckle

Mac thought that was the best offer he'd ever received on a first date.

Mac awoke in the morning to discover she was on her side propped on an elbow staring at him.

"You looked beautiful and innocent when you are sleeping," she said.

"And when I'm awake?"

"Well I'd have to say you look more attractive than Frankenstein."

He lunged and grabbed her.

She squealed and struggled to break free and yelled she needed to have a pee first.

"Pee over me if you can't hold," he invited, as he slopped saliva on to her cunt and slowly pushed in.

When she began banging back at him she said, "You deserve the Nobel Prize for Artful Seduction, repeatedly delivering it to a girl when she really needs it. I'm at my softness for a morning fuck and feel every stroke, every caress right to my core."

"That sounds as if it's the peak of your receptiveness. Shall I attempt to impregnate you?"

"You can try but you'd be luck. I'm forty."

"It's been done before."

"Then please don't try. Put on a condom and I'll roll over. I haven't had anal for years and I guess by your robust nature anal is not unknown to you."

"No it isn't. You have a sweet ass so this could be memorable."

"Go to it lovely man."

* * *

Lovely man?

That could be questionable. Some men and women wouldn't like Mac at all because of the irreverent attitude he displayed toward women, looking and talking about their breasts as if they were his personal property for god sake and being rather too upfront and even rude with them.

The men would have little else to complain about because despite Mac being swallowed in the army all those years and living shoulder-to-shoulder mostly with men, he didn't really associate with males socially. He practically ignored men while he constantly befriended females and even kept the social relationship going with many of them even if they couldn't or wouldn't have sex with him. While some men shy away from women Mac would walk up to them, even to a bunch of them and say hi and that opener seemed to really work because in the main women weren't used to that.

Well his eccentric mother did dress him in female clothes until he was four... she'd been expecting a baby girl. As well, his mom had five younger sisters while his father had four and one brother whom Mac regarded as effeminate. The family had their suspicions about Owen because he painted and was rarely out of his painting smock and his hair was shoulder length and he associated with guys called Nigel, Felix, Kyle, Tristan, Colin, Bernie, Doris and Willy and numerous Dicks and even two Macs and that had Mac worried.

Interestingly when at primary school Mac became the center of numerous complaints from girls he'd attempted to interfere with them but never did any guy complain or is it guys don't complain? At high school the complaints from females had disappeared and the girls who wished to be interfered with knew they could always rely on finding Mac hovering near the bicycle shed or the back of the boiler house. Not many know this but during that time his nickname was Mr Reliable (for always being there) but oddly enough it was only the females who called him that.

Now in the case of Kendra Hart, a stable, sensible woman with a MEd, it might be difficult to envisage her being so taken with Mac, taken exhaustively as it happened on that first night they'd slept together no long after they'd first met.

Well first of all there was the influence of her daughter Jo who'd practically hated all men because one man, Willy Hart her father, had dumped her mother (and then divorced her) when Jo was seven to run off with his best friend Richard. And yet just the other day she'd called her mom to say she'd met this powerhouse of a man who was handsome with winning ways who had offered to get her a more secure job. Although Kendra struggled to think of a more secure job for Jo with her limited education than wrapping up books for dispatch, she'd caught the excitement in Jo's voice and then Jo had said Kendra would really like being banged by this guy.

Kendra had almost dropped in surprise. Usually Jo got all grumpy and withdrawn when she knew her mother had temporarily attached to a man. They were always married men and always are when you're divorced and looking for a new guy to jointly unfold a respectable relationship. She'd known beyond all reasonable doubt that with her daughter saying this guy was well-built, her age and was good looking to boot, it really had sounded she should bang this guy. Perhaps repeatedly.

Kendra, who taught English literature to seniors at an exclusive girls' school, wasn't due to teach till the second period and was traveling to school just after 9:30 when Jo called from her new workplace.

"How did it go mom?"

"Great."

"I mean what's he like at banging, were you too big for him, all that kind of stuff?"

"We had a great evening Jo and it was lovely. That's all I'm prepared to say. Exactly what kind of business is this you now work with Jo?"

"Aargh mom. I wanted all the juicy bits in a blow-by-blow erotic description of mattress mayhem."

"You have never shown this interest before in fact quite the opposite."

"Hot diggity mom. This guy is so different to the usual pathetic types that attach to you. Did he go for your tits first or zero on the slippery box?"

"You read too many of those filthy paperbacks young woman. Now tell me what does the company you work for do to earn its income?"

Jo yawned sitting at the two phones on her desk. There was no switchboard. "We deal in asset striping, cyber fraud, espionage and sabotage to name some of the things as well as drink lots of tea."

"Darling I must say goodbye. I can't waste my time listening to that nonsense when I have this splitting headache."

"Bye mom," Jo sighed.

Jack the scientist came in beside Jo to deposit a fresh cup of tea. She looked up at the boss's husband and rubbed her hand down the front of his pants.

"Jack if this ever requires some attention just give me the nod.

Jack licked his lips and asked, "Do you blow dick?"

Jo's answer was to smile at Jack, her lips formed into a beautiful big 'O'.

"Is thirty pounds a blow okay Jack?"

"Gee I don't know. That's a little stiff."

"I only blow when it's stiff Jack."

He chuckled and his wife, a former policeman, came out and barked, "Jack Francis you're loitering."

Mac came in from a job just before I:00, looking a little better than he had on the train that morning.

"Lunch?"

"Yeah but please don't ask me if I want tea. I'll want coffee."

* * *

Mac and Jo was strolling along the footpath looking for a cheap place dishing out noodles and coffee that smelt like coffee when they heard a violent bang in the jeweler's shop they were passing.

Mac raced inside and in a flying tackle brought down a masked man who'd just blasted a hole in the ceiling with his shotgun.

Jo yelled in fright, "Don't leave me" and followed him into the shop.

Another masked man came racing towards her with his shotgun and a sack. Jo ducked to avoid the gun and the gunman flipped over her back and landed on the tiled floor, winding himself.

The shop's alarm was blaring, scaring Jo even more.

Feeling the shotgun under her hand Jo picked it up, straightened and clubbed the fallen guy's head with the butt.

The shotgun went off blasting another hole in the ceiling.

"Jo!" Mac yelled, attempting to subdue the big guy wrestling him.

"I'm okay," she yelled and spotting the head of the guy grappling with Mac she whacked it with the butt of the shotgun yelling, "Take that asshole."

"Hold it Tiger, don't whack anyone else, all the bad guys are down," Mac said. "Jesus you were impressive. Who trained you?"

The business owner and his wife, as terrified witnesses, said later, "I said this at the time and I'll tell you gentlemen of the media this and it's no disrespect to Allah. I said Allah be praised and Mr Mac said no Rashid, her name is Jo."

The media cracked up at that.

Mac called Pam when the two villains were being taken off by the police and said they'd witnessed an attempted robbery and had to go to the police station to made formal statements.

"Can't you get out of it? You two have been away from the office long enough."

"The cops insist."

"Well make it snappy and try to work the name of our company into the statements and we might get a bit of free publicity out of it."

* * *

Kendra was at her parent's place for dinner that evening when the third item during the evening news about an attempted robbery came on.

"Oh look it's Jo," said Mrs Morris.

Kendra and her father gathered around and gawked as the story was told and plucky Jo was praised for her courage in taking out two notorious robbers than the police had a big team engaged in attempting to apprehend them.

"I can't believe it," Kendra said. "Jo is more timid than brave and she told me she now worked for some sort of fraud investigation agency and I didn't believe her."

"Well Jo has really distinguished herself now," said her proud grandmother. "Kendra why don't you get an introduction to that guy Jo was with. He looks the type who might be a longer-lasting husband than Jo's father. He might also know how to deliver good sex."

Kendra studied the ceiling, deeply embarrassed.

* * *

Jo was having dinner with her friend Bridget and family and instead of wandering off said she'd like to watch TV news.

Bridget said, "You never watched the news claiming you don't like being educated."

"Tonight's different. I'll be in a news clip."

"Hey guys Jo's on TV news tonight."

Mr and Mrs Winstone, Bridget and her older brothers Pete and Alec watched the interview in awe and even Jo was proud of herself, knowing she'd unintentionally given the impression she did this sort of thing every day.

They all enjoyed the bit when Mac became confused and thought the business owner was meaning to be praising Jo rather than Allah.

"Geeze Jo," Alec said. "You were so fast and showed nerves of steel. Want to go to the movies with me Friday night?"

"I suppose so providing Bridget can come too."

But her friend said, "No you go alone, have a proper date Action Girl."

Alec said, "It's okay. Spider Watson has dumped Ivy so I'll get him to make up the four with you Brickie."

"Steve Watson? Omigod," Bridget breathed.

* * *

Pam and Jack were watching TV when the faces of Jo and Mac came on screen as the newsreader said, "These two employees of aptly named Sapphire Private Investigations foiled a brazen lunchtime jewelry shop robbery today when two shots were fired. Investigation agent Miss Jo Hart courageously felled a 160 lb criminal and dodged his shotgun blast and as the assailant lay winded she gave him a very big headache with the butt of the shotgun. She then raced to the aid of her fellow agent who was struggling with his 220 lb opponent who'd already sent a shotgun blast into the ceiling. Miss Hart, who is only nineteen, also sent that guy to sleep with the crack of a shotgun butt perfectly stuck over his right ear. Both robbers have been the center of a prolonged police hunt but they came to grief today when they tangled with Sapphire private investigator Jo Hart."

Pam's mouth had dropped open each time the Sapphire was named.

"Mr McLaughlin is the hero," Jo told the media conference. Mac is a former tank commander and war hero and just charged in when hearing the shotgun blast, knowing someone was in trouble. I just tagged along as I always do because I'm only McLaughlin's sidekick. Actually I don't like the rough stuff because it might break my nails. Mac was grappling with the really big guy and the bad guy's accomplice charged at me lifting his shotgun. I ducked low and he flipped over me like we did to unsuspecting kids when fooling around at school. He appeared to be getting to his feet. The impact had left me shaken but I checked and couldn't find any parts missing, not even any sign of blood but I had a [bleep] sore back. So I bopped him with the butt of the shotgun and it went off scaring the [bleep] out of me and I bopped the guy who was trying to pin down Agent McLaughlin. Nothing to it really. Sapphire Investigations expects us to perform top class."

"Hello gentleman of the media, I am Rashid, owner and principal jeweler of this store. Miss Hart was a very, very brave young woman. My wife and I were petrified and yet we saw it all. Miss Hart flips the guy and hits him with the gun, saying take that asshole. Mr Mac had rushed in when hearing the shotgun blast that was meant to scare us into unlocking the safe. Mr Mac tackled the guy and they were in a maul when Miss Hart she comes and slams the butt of the second shotgun over the ear of the big thug and he drops like solid concrete, eh?"

"Mr McLaughlin," asked a reporter, "What have you to say about your sidekick?"

"I feel safe in walking the streets of London with her after this, and that's the truth mate. She was a heroic little dynamo."

Rashid jumped in. "I said this at the time and I'll tell you gentlemen of the media this and it's no disrespect to Allah. I said Allah be praised and Mr Mac said no Rashid, her name is Jo."

The media guys off-camera could be heard laughing when the presenter said, "well that's the end of this delightful story about yet another crime being nipped in the bud."

Pam looked at her husband. "Oh god, we'll be in trouble with the authorities. Although there's no requirement for licensing in the UK as an investigator Jo looks little older than a school kid."

"Tell the authorities TV stuffed it up calling her an agent, that we only have ex-police or ex-army trained investigators. She's Mac's driver and personal assistant."

Pam looked at her yawning husband. "That TV interview will be worth the equivalent of thousands and thousands of dollars of free advertising to us and it will be in newspapers as well."

"Yes I reckon that too. We are very lucky to have had Jo come and work for us."

"Yes very lucky. She seems to be friendly with you. Keep close to her darling, we don't wanted to have her head-hunted."

"Yes certainly dear but I don't know what we have in common."

"Think of something dear. It need not be anything sophisticated."

"You mean something very basic?"

"Yes exactly Jack."

Jack went out to get more tea muttering, "Something I can get my teeth into."

CHAPTER 3

Sapphire was swamped with new business enquiries but alas about only one in twenty of them converted into profitable business.

At least half the callers asked for Agent Hart and that told Pam she needed a new junior on the phone and she attached Jo to Mac as his assistant. Surprisingly Jo turned out to be a good driver and at times that allowed Mac to doze, such was his confidence in her driving ability in the asphalt jungle. Some new clients specifically asked for them to be assigned to their case before they would sign.

Only two weeks after McLaughlin and Hart began gestating into a credible team, the police swooped and took Mac in for questioning.

After Sapphire had been called in and cracked a suspected case of theft of medical supplies, the arrested CEO had puzzled over who could have been the anonymous tipster who'd led to his arrest after a police squad in charge of an inspector arrived at his office and demanded to once again search his office.

The CEO had smirked and agreed and the search team began their work. Two officers spun the cabinet around and one of them smiled knowingly at the CEO and called, "Hey inspector we may have uncovered a secret apartment."

The panel was unscrewed and the searchers found invoice books and other documents and a large amount of money for which the CEO Bob Giles had no explanation. He was arrested on suspicion of theft from his employer. Police soon found the dummy company, named on the invoices and other documents, was registered to the same Bob Giles as sole owner/operator. No taxes had been paid on his ill-gotten gains and so he also was charged also with tax fraud, with other charges pending. A bank account containing £631,740 in the name of Bob Giles had been frozen.

Giles and his legal team pondered over how could the two women investigators from Sapphire have broken into the office and made the search. Then after the foiled attempted robbery of the jeweler, Mac McLaughlin was suspected as the possible break-in artist. Giles' team called in their own private investigator who found scuffs on the end of the moveable extension of the fire escape and those were tested as being of very recent origin.

Excited by this, the team worked out how the intruder or intruders could have carried out their illegal entry of the building and then successfully searched the office uninterrupted. The lawyers had already found by a discovery process that the police had acted on information supplied from an anonymous informant where incriminating documents were hidden in that office. That together with the break-in theory the team lodged a formal complaint with the police. Macville McLaughlin was named as the chief suspect.

The police had no option but to take Mac in for questioning.

Because he'd not been charged, once Mac realized what the line of questioning was about he asked for a recess and called Jo.

"Thank god they have let you use your phone. Are you okay?"

Mac was momentarily stunned by Jo's apparent level of concern. "Yes but this is serious. Watch what you say because all phone calls are recorded. Now consider this carefully, you know how I sometimes doze beside you?"

"Yes."

"You know who's called Brickie?"

"Of course."

"Why not drive there and park securely, very securely, and then return to your post?"

"Got you. Leave everything intact?"

"Yeah exactly. Very bright you are. Bye. Oh expect a visit."

"Right bye. Waste of time if that happens eh?"

Mac smiled and thought she was very bright indeed. The cops would be wasting their time with her.

The cops couldn't fault the allegation against Mac. It was very plausible theory and the only thing lacking was evidence to prove the theory. Even a confession would be helpful.

Mac lied when asked had he been in the offices or in the adjoining warehouse, had he ever been in the dependant's office and had he committed the crime in breaking and entering the premises. Mac didn't mind lying because otherwise he'd give the slimy defendant the satisfaction of being instrumental in sending Mac to jail.

By the time that interrogation was over Mac knew that Jo would have parked the van with everything in it intact, behind Brigit's parents' detached stand-alone garage. Jo had mentioned to him that Bridget's father had twice had his driver's license suspended and fined heavily in court after being found guilty of driving at excessive speeding so was very likely to hide the van for as long as Mac wished because he would be sore about the cops.

The police advised Mac he remained a material suspect and was allowed to leave the police station. Mac returned to the office and took Jack out for a beer and related how he'd broken into the building and searched the office.

"By yourself?"

"No."

"With Jo; she started with us about that time?"

"Would you expect me to incriminate another person?"

Jack shook his head. "Okay tell me everything including what you wore, how you executed the break-in and exactly what you did in the CEO's office."

It took an hour doing that including Mac answering Jack's questions.

"It sounds pretty clean to me unless the CEO's teams plants incriminating evidence but that's unlikely to be done by a law firm with a good reputation so I doubt that there will be any dirty tricks. Providing the cops don't find the clothes you two wore there is only one thing that will save you from a judge ruling circumstantial evidence is enough to send you to trial and that's the door at the top of the fire escape. Of course if they find your grappling hook and manage to link that back to you, you'd be wasting your time pleading not guilty.