- NonHuman
- Kiss of the Moon
- Page 3
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`Is everything better.`
`Yes... she knows we're Were as well.` Bastion nodded, it was that she knew from the start, it gave her the chance to back away, before she became too involved.
`How has she reacted?`
`Calm... but we will see how she reacts later when everything has sunk in.` Bastion nodded and left them in peace. Wolfgang turned to the woman in his arms, slowly... he told himself as he watched her sleep in his arms. He would have to take this very slowly.
- COMMENTS
Whitley43434 months agoI was very interested to begin with, but as the chapter went along it became more difficult to follow who was speaking when. This story is also in bad need of a proof reader, grammar errors are to be expected but this one has numerous. Proof reader and editor is needed to better engross ur audience into the world you have created.
Levindl11 months agoI love the start of the story. I am looking forward to its continuation. You really do need an editor. For one example, it is spelled “Sub-dural hematoma.
jdan526about 1 year agoInteresting premise held back by horrendous grammar. I'm hoping part 2 is better.
Purplefizzover 1 year agoThe bones of this story have promise, however it’s just so hard to read - readers are constantly back checking to see who is speaking, as the speech marks close onto the listener’s reaction, I’m really hoping this is just a formatting issue that gets resolved in a chapter or twos time, if it isn’t it’s shoddy writing. Beyond frustrating. 3⭐️
oldpantythiefover 1 year agoI was hoping for a good story but this one is too difficult to read. It's hard to know who is speaking at times and the thread is just too jerky. I don't deduct for typos, but there were several that should have been caught by a proof reader. Sorry
