Leanna

"It's a complete mystery to me also. I mean, she won't even talk to me about it. My own mother leaves my dad and gets up and walks away every time I try to discuss it with her. Now when the shit finally hits the fan, she is all angry and surprised that her husband wants out of the marriage. It's like she has really lost all contact with reality except where it directly concerns her."

If it wasn't such a tragedy to me, I would have laughed out loud. My wife is angry with me because I want to divorce her. The abandonment of me and our marriage apparently are not factors to be considered in the decision that I made to divorce her. Her far less than loving behavior towards me, obviously in her opinion, should not cause me to take such a dastardly step.

"Well she has the number for my attorney so I should not have to deal with her at least directly. However if you should hear that the she-devil is heading my way, give me fair warning and I will run as fast as possible in the opposite direction. Really, Sam, I have lost all desire to speak personally with your mother."

Shortly after that, we ended our conversation. No sooner had I replaced the receiver than the phone rang again. I looked at the caller ID and felt the blood run from my face. It was the She-Devil herself. Being the intelligent and brave soul that I am, I let it go to voice mail. Then I deleted the message without listening to it.

A few minutes later, the phone rang again. And again, it was my wife. I repeated steps one and two and then muted the ringer for the phone. These new office phones have all kinds of features. I was lucky that with my promotion some months ago, I had been given a new cell phone with a new number. I was sure that Leanne did not have that number.

The thought of what mischief my wife could be up to unsettled me and ensured that I spent a restless night. I dozed throughout the night but never really achieved an actual sleep state. The next morning, I wearily entered my office where I was greeted by my secretary.

"Good morning Boss, I certainly hope that what has been going on here for the last half hour is not indicative of how our day will go on from here." Paula smiled too brightly and handed me a half dozen phone messages from guess who?

"Please get my attorney on the line as soon as possible. Also, under no circumstances do I want to receive any calls from my wife. I'm going to lock my office door just in case the bitch actually has the balls to come here. If she does arrive, you are to contact the police to come and remove a dangerous and violent trespasser. Am I clear?"

"Crystal" was her short and snappy reply.

A few minutes later I was on the phone with Sarah. "I don't want to have any contact with my wife. Is there anything that I can do to keep her away from me at home and at work?" I had told her what my daughter had related to me about Leanne making statements concerning our divorce. I was really digging in my heels here. I did not under any circumstances want any contact with my wife. Once I had made up my mind to go through with the divorce, I was done with her.

I was just getting ready to hang up the phone when suddenly there was this ferocious banging on my office door. I heard Leanne through the door yelling, cussing and screaming. I asked Sarah if she was still on the line and if she could hear my wife?

"Actually, I can hear her very well. Don't hang up as I'm recording her and I want to get as much as I can."

I heard Paula tell Leanne that she was trespassing. Also she was very firm in letting her know that I had left orders that if she refused to leave, the police would be called and she would be arrested. Leanne answered with even louder screams and swearing.

I don't know how Paula did it but in just a few more minutes the police were in my outer office and shortly after they escorted Leanne from the building. I found out later that they took her to the station and even though there were no charges made, there was now a record of her behavior. By noon the next day, Sarah had made arrangements to have a restraining order in place. My wife could not stop shooting herself in the foot.

After that, I heard no more from my wife. However, the restraining order did not stop her from hounding our daughter. Sam called me every few days to relay the latest demand from Leanne. Her pendulum swung from one extreme to the other. On one hand there was "I will never give you a divorce" to "I'll take you for every dime you have".

After a few weeks, Leanne stopped bothering Sam. I guess she finally got it through her thick skull that her daughter had no control over my divorce petition. In fact from what Sam told me, she flatly informed her mother that she supported my actions.

About three weeks after filing for divorce, Sarah called me. "Monte, just wanted to let you know that Leanne has hired a lawyer. I spoke with him this morning and he wants to set up a meeting with the four of us in attendance."

"No and not only no, but hell no. I have complete faith in your talent and know that you will represent me to the best of your ability. So I don't agree to any meeting with Leanne that includes me. That is my final answer!"

"I realize very well that you do not have to attend any such meeting. However, as your lawyer I must say that it is very irregular. Also it goes against what I know to be in your best interests. I must advise you that attending any such meeting is very important in this divorce proceeding.

"I don't care and even if it costs me more money, I will not attend any meeting."

Sarah kept me up to date even though there was not much progress to report. My wife, through her attorney, kept repeating her request for a meeting with all parties. I dug in my heels and just kept on saying no to any meeting.

Well I have only myself to blame because my own stubbornness put me right in the position that I had been avoiding at all costs. Sarah called and asked me to stop by her office after work. She said that she needed to bring me up to date on the progress of my divorce.

"Hi Monte, come on in." Sarah didn't give me the typical smiling welcome I was used to receiving from her. That put me just a little on edge as I took a seat in her office. Instead of taking a seat behind her desk as she normally did, she took a seat in a chair next to me.

"I warned you that I needed your participation in these meetings. Well today, your stubbornness just bit you in the ass. In our meeting today with the judge, she kept asking why you were not there. I told her the only thing that I could. I told her that you did not want to have to see or talk with your wife."

"I knew that I was going to really piss off Judge Martin when I told her that. But not even for you am I going to lie to a judge while sitting in front of her in chambers. I just about shit when Leanne requested for mandated marriage counseling. I objected of course but I could see right off the bat that Judge Martin snapped up that idea like a dog with a bone."

"I'm absolutely not and I repeat, not going to any counseling with that bitch! They can't make me do that, can they?"

"Let me explain it to you in small words so that even you can understand. You will be going to counseling with your wife or you will be going to jail. If you decide to go to jail, Judge Martin can pretty much keep you there as long as she likes. She can keep you there far longer than any time you could have spent attending meetings with your wife. Am I clear?"

I've heard of people that felt so strongly about something that they were willing to go to jail. I'm not one of them. I don't believe in cutting off my nose to spite my face either. "I'm not going to jail. So what do I have to do and for how long?"

She handed me a list. "There are four names on this list. You will pick two, Leanne will pick two and Judge Martin will pick two. The name most chosen will be your counselor. The judge has decided that you will attend a minimum of twenty sessions. Ten will be by yourself and ten will be with your wife. Also the judge asked me to let you know that this is not an item for discussion. You will attend and you will not miss any scheduled session or she will jail you for contempt."

I was pissed but had to recognize that, as Sarah said, this was a self- inflicted injury. I had no one to blame but myself. I grabbed a pen off her desk and randomly checked two names. There was no way to see what the gender might have been. Sarah took my selections and after just a few moments we were done and I was out the door.

Over the next few days, I waited for the other shoe to drop. I worried constantly about the choice of counselor. The names on the list did not give the first names so there was no indication of gender. I really wanted to get a man as I felt that I would be more likely to establish a more understanding relationship with a male.

I guess in the story of my life, the more I wanted something, the less likely I was to get it. When Sarah called me, I could hear the bad news in her voice. She knew that I wanted a male in the worst way. The tone of her voice let me know immediately that I had lost my choice. The counselor was a woman and her name was Dr. Loretta Sterling.

Chapter 4

I just sucked it up because as my grandpa always said, it is what it is. So, there I was in the good doctor's waiting room. Of course my trials didn't end with that statement. Sitting across the room was my wife. She did try to avoid looking at me, but when she did, it was with a hard glare.

As I waited, I reflected on the fact that after almost a year, I still didn't know why Leanne was so angry with me. Over the years of our marriage, I had learned that she had three levels that she could reach when she was unhappy with me. There was pissed, mad and of course the worst was angry. The looks and the way she had treated me was definitely in the angry category. Not knowing why made it so much more aggravating.

Finally we were ushered into the inner sanctum of Dr. Sterling's office. Other than the chair behind a desk, there were only two chairs for our selection. I took the one on the right. A moment later, I noticed that Leanne was still standing. She seemed to be looking for a chair other than the obvious one that was available. I could see that she did not want to sit next to me. With a small sigh, I stood and moved her chair as far from mine as was possible.

As I returned to my chair, she took hers as well. Then she crossed her legs and shifted so that she did not have to look at me. I was really starting to get angry. Fortunately, Dr. Sterling came into the room. Taking her chair behind the desk, she greeted us warmly.

"Good evening Leanne and Francis. My name as you know is Dr. Loretta Sterling. Please, in order to keep things as relaxed as possible, call me Loretta. I hope that I can address you by your given names as well." She seemed very calm and it was obvious that she was trying to make us at ease with her and our surroundings.

"I have a few rules that I must insist that you both follow. First, I cannot help you without complete honesty on your part. Second, and this is most important, no interrupting when the other is speaking. Just wait your turn and I will always give you an opportunity to speak."

My chair was turned just enough that I could see Leanne nod her head as I nodded mine as well. That seemed to be simple and straight forward. I was sure that I could meet her requests. I was also excited because I was beginning to feel that maybe I could get some of the answers to why we were at this place in our lives.

"I know that you are both here for court-ordered counseling. I also know, Leanne, that you requested this meeting. Francis, I know that you did not want any meeting with your wife. I have the judge's order and I plan to complete the required sessions as directed. I would like to meet with Leanne every Tuesday at 4:00 pm and then I will meet with Francis every Wednesday at 4:00 pm. We will have a joint session every Friday at 5:00 pm. Is there any scheduling problem with these days and times?

Again, our response was non-verbal as we both shook our heads. "Great! I need to know from each of you just why you are here and what you hope to accomplish with these sessions. Leanne, I will have you go first. As simply as you can, please tell me why you are here and what your goals may be."

Without looking at me, Leanne began, "I don't want a divorce. It's that simple to me. I want to know why my husband cheated on me and I want you to help us get past his actions."

Her statement left me speechless. At least I avoided violating the second rule about interrupting. This was the first clue that she had given me. Her abandonment of me began to make some sense. I still did not understand why she left me without a word and why so much time had passed without a word from her.

"Francis, please give me your answer."

"Doctor, I would like you to address me as either Monte or Mr. Moody. No one except my mother calls me Francis. I have never liked that name and I won't respond to it. Now, I want to make it clear that I don't want to be here. I will comply with the judge's order, so don't worry about that. When my wife left me, she did it without a word. No one else in my entire life has ever treated me as coldly as she did that evening. This is the first I've heard about her reasons for her actions."

I decided to stop right there. I was still confused about the charge of cheating on my wife. From our first date, I never even kissed another woman except for an occasional innocent kiss to the cheek. I was now curious to hear about this fictitious affair. I knew that this gave me a one up on Leanne and I wanted to talk with my lawyer so, together, we could plan a strategy on how best to proceed.

My wife and Loretta did most of the talking for the remaining time in our session. Leanne said that she had information from two separate sources that confirmed that I had been cheating on her. "I know that he cheated on me with more than one woman. I know that he met them for sex on several occasions. I could feel that I was losing my love for him, drawing further away each day. I kept hoping that he would stop and finally confess to me, but that never happened."

"The night that he wanted to sit down and talk was the last straw. When Monte tried to put the blame on me for our failing relationship, I lost it completely. I could only see two choices. I could kill him or I could leave. As bad as he had hurt me, I just couldn't hurt him. I left that night. The next day, I came back and took all my belongings. I quit my job and cut all my ties with him."

During this dialogue, Leanne kept fidgeting in her chair and wringing her hands. I could see her becoming distraught as she continued relating her tale.

"I had hoped that by leaving him, he would finally confess all his cheating. Once he did that, we could start working on getting back together. It never happened and I was so angry with him when he poisoned my relationship with our daughter. I just kept waiting for something to happen that would let me begin talking with him again. This divorce gave me that opportunity."

Once she finally ran down, they both turned and looked to me as if asking for an explanation for my actions. "Well she has certainly made me look like the bad boy. I must put this as plainly as possible. I never knew about any of the things that she has revealed today. I never knew why she left or where she went. I had no way to contact her. I had no phone number, place of work, or home address. She left me without a single word and until our daughter contacted me, I didn't even know if she was still in town."

I had been looking directly at Loretta but then I turned to Leanne and said, "I can't believe that after almost a year apart with no communication to speak of that you have the balls to say you want to save our marriage. I'm saddened to say that you are basically too late. I don't believe that with all that has happened, there is much left to try to save."

I just stopped at that point because I didn't want to say more until talking with my lawyer. At that point Loretta pointed out that we were out of time for our first session. She reminded us of our next appointments with her. I rose to leave, however Leanne remained seated. Maybe she didn't want to leave at the same time with me. I really did not want to walk out to our cars together either. In just moments I had quickly reached my car. As I pulled out of the lot, I caught a glimpse of my wife leaving the building.

That evening I could not stop thinking of what Leanne had accused me of doing. I knew that I had not cheated with another woman with even so much as an inappropriate hug or kiss. Her belief in my guilt seemed to be honest and if she did believe I had cheated, then, her anger would be justified.

I just could not see what I may have done to convince her of my guilt. Understand, I am the original home-body. I would much prefer to stay at home rather than go out to eat or for entertainment. Looking at our lives together, Leanne was away from our home much more than I. Especially after she went back to work and when you looked at the time she spent with the two she-devils, June and Carol.

Leanne used to tease me because she had seen on several occasions that I had been clueless when some woman was hitting on me. She even went on to laugh at me because if I became aware of something like that, I would immediately distance myself from the situation. Leanne said that on those few occasions, the look on my face was priceless.

The next day I spoke with Sarah on the phone. "You are telling me that your wife is accusing you of having affairs? She is saying that you are cheating on her with more than one woman? She moved out because she feared doing you bodily harm?"

Sarah paused for a moment.

"I have to ask if her accusations are true. It won't change anything on the divorce because we are a 'no fault state'. It could however possibly have adverse effects on some of the court proceedings we may have to deal with."

"Sarah, I can say without a doubt, I have never cheated on my wife. Throughout our marriage, I have honored the vows that I took before God, her, our families and friends."

"Okay, I believe you. Now that there is no issue of cheating on your part, my next question would be about whether you believe she has cheated on you? You have had no contact with her for a year. There is a lot that could have happened in that time. You have continued to honor your wedding vows but has she?"

"However, there is the fact that she claims to have reliable information or witnesses to your infidelity. I want you to find out during your counseling sessions, exactly what information she has that has convinced her that you have cheated. I have an idea for a plan of action, but I need any information you can obtain before I can put it into place."

Sarah refused to share details of her plan. I spent the next several days making plans of my own. I was trying to think of the best ways that I could ask for the proof of my infidelities. I had several ideas but decided in the end to go with the flow. If my questions seemed to be scripted, that may make Leanne suspicious and less willing to share any details.

So there it was, Wednesday and it was 4:00 pm. I was sitting in a chair in the good doctor's office twiddling my thumbs waiting for my first individual session to begin. I don't know why I was so anxious about this meeting. I just couldn't imagine what we would have to talk about for a solid hour.

Doctor Swift came swiftly into her office and took her chair behind the desk. I'm sorry, but I could not help the pun and it brought a grin to my face. She smiled at me and then we started my first solitary counseling session.