Lessons of Darkness

"Portal ad caelum," I shout, beginning the process. The demon looks on with slight curiosity.

"Inhabitare facit unius moris in conspectu tuo," I continue. The cracking and flashes that have characterized most of my other summonings are absent here. More like an ineffable stillness that spreads itself across the proceedings.

"Nobis concedas transitum." With that an opaque oval joins us in this room. What path it will lead to remains unknown so far.

"Dum nostrorum animos habere pudicos," I finish, and what is on the other side of the portal is revealed.

Just as I had hoped, the gateway I have opened up leads to the place that we on Earth refer to

as Heaven. I don't have the best view but it has hard to distinguish shades of white instead of the black ones found here in the netherworld. A mid pitch hum seems to be exiting it, creating a soothing feeling that even seems to be getting to Abaddon here.

Shocked, the demon rushes unthinkingly into the portal, to the bliss that it has been deprived from in the hellscape that it resides in. I'm not even sure if its immediate reaction is to destroy this place. If Christian-Judeo mythology is to be believed, this creature once belonged in God's good graces. Maybe a return is what it wants at first. I'm sure eventually if allowed it'll return to its innermost nature and commence with its destructive tendencies once more.

But I suspect that it won't be allowed. Abaddon's change in demeanor once he crosses over all but confirms my suspicion. Something is happening to it. It takes Abaddon awhile but then it understands completely. A demon cannot handle such an exposure to such purity. It has signed its own death warrant. The demon of destruction destroyed by its own hand. How fitting.

In a way though it is healed through the knowledge of its impending destruction. Its anger and hatred knows no home in such a peaceful land. A defeat that signals the prevailing of peace and love over what Abaddon represents. Deep down, its need to destroy probably came from an anger at itself. An anger whose base lay in the fact that such a creature as it, a creature that has no place in the Kingdom of Heaven, exists. Now that Abaddon's existence will no longer be palpable it can let go of its anger and just for a few moments before death enjoy the peace it has always secretly wanted.

It disintegrates completely and utterly throughout the heavenly air. But who knows what happens when a demon dies? Anything can happen. Maybe a piece of it finds itself residing in the realm of Heaven. A reformation of its being and a return to the form it once had before it was kicked out of such a sacred place might very well occur.

And with that the book falls to the floor. I guess this will be the book's final resting place, an out of the way place that no one will ever bother to look. My arms, well they're no longer in book holding shape. Dissolving into dust is what they are. Returning was always a pipe dream anyhow, something I really shouldn't have gotten my hopes up for. Looks like my luck only goes so far.

I know they say that God works in mysterious ways, that his ways are not always known to us. That doesn't appear to be the case for me, he wrapped this one up with a nice and tidy bow. It's a shame it has to end this way but I get why he did it like this. I have completed the duty that I was born for, my services on Earth are no longer required. I witnessed the demons I had to and learned what I needed from them.

I'm going to miss Charlotte. I know I've said that enough for you all. It's just I could never spend enough time with her. Our relationship was always going to end in a tragedy, this one just came a bit earlier than I would hope for. The dichotomy of the two of us, me a man, her a woman, me who summons demons, her who works toward improving her church, me who loves her and her who loves me... Hey, we had that last one in common, guess we weren't just a pair of differences who had found their compliment after all.

I don't know, maybe I do get a bit googly-eyed when it comes to her. Sometimes I get a bit lost in the fantasy of our relationship instead of the reality. But our relationship was nice enough that it did feel like a fantasy. Every day two people coming together to use their differences to bolster their relationship and using their commonalities as the base of their relationship. What more could anyone ever ask for?

Lilith lands beside me in my final moments in my physical body. I turn to her to show her just how far gone I am. She smiles sadly in recognition of what's happening to me. The knowledge of victory shrouded in the sacrifice that victory took to attain. Bittersweet to a tee is what the flavor of the outcome is.

I feel it coming. My entire body is disintegrating. What lies in store for me will be...

***************************************

It's been a few years since I've lost my corporeal form and found whatever was left residing in the netherworld. No time at all for most of the ageless beings that reside here. But that is decidedly not the case for me.

I have become something beyond a ghost. Not a spirit who can't move on but one who has nowhere to go to. At least my soul's still intact. No moving onto the heavenly part of the afterlife for me though. I was never meant to be in god's grace, his all-powerful love would have proven too consuming for a sojourner into the unknown like me. In the underworld lies a good home for me, to study the damned and see if I can lift their spirits up. I now know that their own inclinations are what sent them to such a low place and not God's judgement.

And really, Hell is just a matter of the interior. I am in a place where for all purposes I should be suffering but I'm not. Instead I have a friend who I love very dearly. After all the times I tried to fight my way back to Charlotte, it's ironic that I ended up with Lilith all along. Yet the barrier that once separated me and Lilith now separates me and Charlotte, it's only logical that a change in partners should follow.

Lilith was able to give Charlotte the news. My new form does not allow for verbal communication to the living so that task had to fall on Lilith. There was great crying on Charlotte's end but she understood and was even proud of me in a way. Happy that I gave my life to stop a great evil that would've endangered us all.

Lilith even relayed the tale of my battle with Abaddon, thereby transmitting the final lesson of darkness. My parents created a task for me whose outcome has fallen to Charlotte to commemorate. The reasons why I was able to defeat these demons will find a fixture in her church.

Charlotte was able to sell my family's manor for a large sum. Lots of aficionados of the supernatural paying top dollar for bits and pieces found in it. That looks to be the end of the Black legacy, what's left will be folded up into the Gray one. Allow me to explain, she finally started her church and named it St. Gray's. A little on the nose the name is, but it's a fitting one.

At least Charlotte's new husband is ok with that little hint of remembrance. She remarried eventually, no use in being lonely. Her new husband knows how important a role her ex played in her life and accepts it. I'm not sure that he's absolutely thrilled about it but he accepts it. Last I heard she was expecting a kid. The knowledge stung a bit but eventually my desire for her to be happy won out.

And I have my own relationship with Lilith now. Gone is my corporeal form so the act of physical copulation is one that I cannot share with her. Instead the spiritual kind of love making that was described in these pages oh so long ago is how we show our love for one another. I think in a way she prefers the ethereal love we make too.

Yet I still hold out hope that one day I will be able to be in the presence of Charlotte once more. I'm sure that Charlotte will be ending up on the opposite end of the afterlife that I am currently stationed at. But maybe I can extricate myself from here and be able to reconnect with Charlotte when the time is right. I have yet to find my parents here, maybe that's proof that I can one day make my way to the light side of the afterlife. Monogamy may be the organizing principle on earth but jealousy doesn't seem to have quite so much domain in the spiritual realm. Perhaps when she transitions out of the earthly plane I'll be able to share my love with her once more.

***************************************

Votes and Comments are always appreciated, unless they aren't. I sincerely hope that you have enjoyed the story.