Letter from Pierre, South Dakota

Dear Shoeblossom

I met Candi in a dog park. She was looking in my boxer’s ears and pronouncing them “filthy”. I had no idea what she was talking about. I liked the dog, but it wasn’t my choice to get him.

Sallianne had bought Clematis. (was she sleeping with the breeder?)

Of course my darling wife wouldn’t walk Clem in the rain or clean up his crap...

Later Sallianne had left me for the douche down the street, and they’d moved from here, in South Dakota to North Dakota. I guess the new guy was allergic to dogs.

But, Clem reminded me of the eight good years, five of them married, that I’d been with Sallianne, and that was great. But I had not quite gotten used to taking over vet duties, and all that.

Candi was adorable. She didn’t seem to have a dog of her own. At first I thought she was a dog-walker. But she was just sort of sitting there in the park.

Curly dark hair, huge green eyes. Lips so full they took over her face, and made me ache to kiss them.

Girls don’t generally like me very much. What was my main quality?

“Lumpy,” Sallianne had told me once, “You stick around for the long haul.”

That was one interesting thing about me.

Then, as I was talking to Candi in the park, Titters, a friend of mine from the South Dakota “scene” walked by with her Lhasa Apso.

She waved to me, and then smiled at Candi. “Hey Candi...”

So they were friends!

“Lumpy’s one of us, you know.”

Candi frowned at me. “Really? ‘Cause someone should take him over their knee for the condition of his Boxer’s ears.”

Titters tossed her blond mane and giggled. “He’s a screamer, I’ve given him the cane--”

“Jesus, Titters! Some things are private--”

And then Candi slapped me. Barely knew me, this girl. “Let’s go.”

“Where?” But she was leading Clematis, and he was guiding her to my car.

I was staring, transfixed at Candi’s cute little butt twitching in the faded jeans.

Watching this, Titters gave her world famous laugh.

“You’d better follow her, slave boy, before you get in any more trouble!”

We dropped Clematis off at my house, and Candi instructed me to go in and get my pajamas.

“I...I don’t wear pajamas. Usually I sleep in my um, drawers.” Not to mention that it’s the middle of the afternoon. But she was so cute...hot. And she was talking about bed, right?

So we then went to her little apartment.

We came inside and Candi went to her bedroom and brought back a pair of pink striped pajamas, and told me to go into her bedroom and put them on.

“Take off everything else, even your underwear.”

I guess if I’d been more authoritative, I might have grabbed her and kissed her then, but I just did as I was told. I came out in the pajamas, and Candi was sitting on her couch with a large thick wooden paddle.

“Men who neglect their pets are usually not capable of adult behavior.” she said, tapping the paddle against her knee.

“So I’m going to give you something to cry about, and then send you to bed for the rest of the day.”

Before I could protest, Candi said, “Don’t worry. I’ll take your keys and go visit Clematis, I’ll CLEAN HIS EARS and walk him. But you are going to bed right here, Mister.”

I should have been more manly about it. Her boobs were bouncing in her peach halter top, and she patted the paddle again, and beckoned to me menacingly.

I walked to her as if in a dream, and Candi pulled my pajama bottoms down and pulled me across her lap.

To say she was able to reduce me to wails and sobbing was an understatement. I’d submitted to more than a few women.

Sallianne had used a belt on me more than once, and I still sent her and her new boyfriend money.

I blubbered, my pajama bottoms tangled around my ankles as Candi escorted me first to the bathroom, where she bent me over the tub and gave me a freezing enema.

After I’d expelled this, it was on to the bedroom...

Where Candi pointed a long nail to the bed, and I hopped on, and involuntarily put my thumb in my mouth.

And then she bustled out.

Later, I was awakened with a sloppy kiss in my ear, and I turned around and Candi was lying next to me, nude and oooh, those boobs!

She began kissing me and asking if I’d learned my lesson.

“If you want, I’ll put some calamine lotion on your poor rear, Lumpy.”

“Candi, I just am not good at washing a dog’s ears.”

“Yeah, it looks like might have to take care of that.” I felt her fingers deftly begin toying with my burgeoning penis.

She kissed me again, and helped me get out of those humiliating pajamas.

“I do have to go into the back room and deal with my husband.” she said.

“Your-your husband?”

“Yes...he’s chained by his balls to the radiator. I might have him come in here and suck you off.”

“I don’t...”

“But I’ll keep kissing you, and let you kiss my tits, Gerard never gets to touch those--and maybe I’ll sit on your face.”

“That-that might keep me hard while he-he-”

“I figure the best way to keep Gerard from being this macho Marine asshole is to make him suck about five dicks a month, you know?”

I gasped as she rubbed my penis just a little faster.

“You seem much easier. In twenty minutes I had you where it took about three months with my annoying husband.”

“I guess I’m pliable.”

“Yes, it’s good to have a nice tractable man. I have had to give Gerard many enemas and to subject him to lots of dildo training. But you know, he’s finally starting to give up all the ex-military bullshit.”

“You-well you got him to let you lock him to a radiator today.”

“Yes, it’s his day off from the burglar alarm company. I try to keep Gerard busy so he doesn’t slouch into beer and potato chips and televised bowling, that stuff.”

I began to see my future with this girl, and I was excited, but kind of scared.