Like We Used To Ch. 02

***********

Years Earlier

"What time will your meeting be over?" Daniel questioned.

"They say it'll last until four but I don't know," Ava spoke into her phone as she pulled up in the parking lot. She was a month into her final year of undergrad, and she couldn't have been more stressed out. She and the rest of the College of Education seniors had to meet in order to discuss what requirements had to be met for their teaching portfolios. She cringed as she pulled up to the small, cracked parking lot across from the building. They would be meeting at a building the university had bought out downtown and she absolutely hated it. She didn't like how the shirtless men huddled in the streets were gazing at her. Her frustration grew even more as she realized the parking lot was already full. Cars filled the side of the streets and she grew more anxious as she figured out she'd have to parallel park.

"Babe," she heard him yell.

"What?!" was her reply.

"I asked are you there yet?"

"Yea, I'm here. I can't find a park and there are people staring at me. God, I hate it down here."

"Baby, just stay on the phone with me until you find a park. But hurry up, you're supposed to be in there by now. You said the meeting starts at 1. Its already 5 after."

"What do you think I'm doing, Daniel? I can't find a fucking place to park. What am I supposed to do, build a new parking lot? Shit."

She was frustrated and he wasn't helping. She decided to end the conversation and focus on parking somewhere, but not before promising to text him when she got inside.

It was another 5 minutes before she found a spot. She grabbed her purse, folders, and notebook before locking her doors and quickly sprinting for the building.

***********

"Thank you Jesus," Ava thought as she looked down at her phone. 3:00. They had finished the meeting an hour early, which was wonderful. She didn't want to be in that crumby part of town no longer than she had to. Before she exited the old building doors, she held securely to her purse and folders. She peered through the glass to see another huddle of men in the streets. She felt her palms become sweaty and she felt that familiar queasy feeling in her stomach. She retrieved her phone from her purse and found Daniel's name before pressing send. It rang 5 times before going to voicemail. She sighed and stamped her foot as she dialed again. Again, it went to voicemail. Ava was pissed and nervous. She looked around and saw a small group of the other undergrads leaving the building. She waited until they walked passed her and out the door to follow. Once she got near her car she quickly unlocked it, threw her things in the passenger seat, and sped off.

"Are you out yet?" the message read.

"I got out at 3. I called you but you didn't pick up," she responded. A couple of seconds later, his face popped up on her screen. She quickly swiped the red 'x' across her screen to ignore the call. She knew it was petty, but she was pissed. She ignored his calls and messages for the rest of the day.

***********

"I called you because I wanted to talk to you as I walked to my car. But of course you didn't answer. I'm not important enough for you to answer my phone calls. I don't want to be with somebody who doesn't think I'm important." She hesitated before pressing the send button. In the year and a couple months they'd been official, that's the longest they'd gone without having a conversation. Ava felt that she had every right to be mad.

"If I didn't think you were important I wouldn't have tried to call you back, asshole. You know how my phone is. I can't always get a signal. You ignore me for days because I missed your phone call but you only answer like 10 percent of mine. Don't be a hypocrite."

It was true that Ava didn't always answer when he called, but she was busy. She was trying her best to finish her last year of undergrad so that she could easily find a job the next semester. Why didn't he understand that?

"There's a difference. If I don't answer your phone calls, it's because I'm busy or I'm sleeping. What do you expect when you call me 2 in the morning? I have to get up in the mornings, you know. I can't sleep until noon like you."

"I knew this wouldn't work. We hardly talk because you're so busy."

"So it's my fault? I'm sorry I can't talk to you 24/7. I'm sorry I'm trying to do something with my life. I'm sorry that you don't get off work until midnight or later. How selfish of me to try to get some sleep so that I don't struggle to get up at 6 every morning and drive 45 goddamn minutes to get to school. What was I thinking?"

Ava was pissed. She was even more pissed that he acted so nonchalant about not answering her phone calls. She had felt that they had become more distant over the past months, but she didn't want it to be a reality. He didn't care anymore. He said that he hadn't been happy for months but he didn't have the balls to break up with her. That hurt her to the core. He was her everything. The one person on earth that she trusted with her life.

He'd even told her that he'd talked to his ex that same day she'd tried to call him.

"So you can text other bitches but can't answer a phone call from your girlfriend. I'm glad I know where we stand now."

"It wasn't like that and you know it Ava."

"The ONE person in the world I tell you to not talk to, you talk to. Fuck you."

Her name was Shae. Ava hated her with everything she had. They had a fling the summer Ava and Daniel took a break from speaking to one another. Daniel had also taken Shae to a Red Hot Chilis concert and lied to Ava about. Ava had always felt like she came in second to Shae, and this did nothing but confirm it.

***********

Their whole relationship was built off of forgiveness, and this time would be no exception. Ava reached out to him and apologized for starting an argument over something as petty as a phone call. She didn't want to argue or ignore him anymore. Since she had met him 4 years ago, she had known he was the only person in the world she wanted to be with. She thought over whether she should say what she wanted to say. She went for it.

"Daniel, be my boyfriend again."

She waited for what seemed like forever for a response.

"Ava...I have something to tell you. Don't hate me."

She said nothing for a while. She was afraid of what he'd say.

"I umm...I..." he started.

"What Daniel? What is it? What did you do?" she interrupted.

"I did something bad."

Silence.

"I did acid again."

Ava's heart sank. Not again.

"Daniel, no. Why?"

"I'm not done yet. I did acid and I tried cocaine."

Ava's heart felt like it had been stomped on. She'd honestly had rather it been another girl than this. They'd been through it before. When had first met, he was addicted to pills and acid. With encouragement he quit. She'd cry as the withdrawal caused him to ache. She'd held him many nights as they lay under layers of blankets in an attempt to get him warm and ease the chills. Many nights when he had insomnia, she'd lie awake with him so he didn't feel lonely.

He'd promise her that he'd never go down that dark path again. She felt betrayed. Before she could help it, she started to cry. She heard him calling her name over and over but she couldn't stop crying.

"You promised me," she managed to get out. "You said you wouldn't put me through that again."

He reached out to grab her but she smacked his hand away.

"Get away from me, junkie. Don't touch me. Don't talk to me. Go do another line of coke and acid. You're not doing this to me again," she said as she backed away from him.

"Baby what are you doing out here?" a voice asked.

Ava slightly jumped. Adriano had startled her. She'd just realized she was still sitting in the driveway.

"I was just..."

"Ava, why are you crying? What's wrong?" Adriano asked as he opened her door and grabbed her hand, leading her out of the car.

"Nothing," she said as she quickly wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand. "Nothing's wrong. Long day," she lied.

Adriano eyed her suspiciously. He could see right through her.

"Mi amore. Look at me. What is wrong?" he asked sternly.

Ava looked up at him for a second then down again.

"Nothing's wrong," she said more confidently. "I'm just not sure I'm cut out for this 1^st grade thing," she lied again.

Adriano studied her for a moment longer before kissing her lightly.

"Go inside," he demanded softly. "I'll grab your things."

Ava quickly walked passed him and into the house. She slid off her shoes and plopped down onto their plush couch. She watched as Adriano entered their home, purse draped over one shoulder, manila folders in one hand, and her phone in his other. Shed forgotten all about her phone. She silently prayed that her Facebook inbox wasn't still on the screen. She eyed Adriano as he placed her things on the counter and walked over to her. He kissed her again and told her to turn around. He then gently massaged her neck and the tops of her shoulders.

Ava closed her eyes and saw Daniel's face. Her mind went back to a time they were sitting on his couch as he did the same exact thing. She quickly opened her eyes and scanned the room. She and Adriano's engagement picture caught her eye as it sat beautifully on the mantle. Her mind took her back to the birthday Daniel had given her a Charlie Brown and Snoopy picture frame with a collage of pictures they had taken as a gift. That made her think of the first time she'd stayed the night at Daniel's house. She woke him up early the next morning to watch Charlie Brown in the living room. She'd occasionally peel her eyes away from the TV to peek at him sleeping beside her.

She had to get him off her mind, because he didn't deserve to be there anymore. She turned around and stared into Adriano's beautiful eyes. She smiled before reaching to place her arms around his neck.

"I love you Adriano de Luca."