Liverpool Ch. 09

I was so happy that He though I was worth all this, not just the collar and lead, but everything He had done for me in the last week, in the last few months. He had given me a life line when I was drowning under Mother's rules and regulations, given me hope when I felt like giving up and now He had given me a home and a place in His world. I couldn't help but cry. He gathered me into His arms and held me gently as I cried. This whole week had been so overwhelming I couldn't take anymore. Sir was so kind, He took me through to the sitting room and sat me on His knee, letting me get all the emotions out.

'I don't know why I cry all the time, Sir. I'm sorry, it's spoiling things and the angrier I get with myself for being like this the more I cry. Then I get scared at how angry I am and that makes me cry even more, and I don't know why!!!'

'It's easy pet. In some ways, you really are a child. You have no idea how to control your emotions because you've never been taught how to do that. From what you've told me, your Mother lashes out whenever she gets upset or angry and your Dad just hid in his shed, so you haven't ever been shown what to do when you get upset. You know you shouldn't lash out, which is admiral in it's self, but you shouldn't hide everything away until you burst, which is what you do. You bottle everything up until it overflows into tears. The big question now is, do you want to learn how not to do that?'

'I can learn how to stop feeling like this?' I sniffed and turned to look at Him with wide eyes.

'Yes, you can. Now I am not going to lie to you and tell you it's easy, but I know you are strong enough to do this with some help. Would you like some help?'

'Who from? I don't know if I can go and talk to a stranger about all this.'

'Would you consider Ross?'

'Master Ross?'

'Yes. He's a nice person, when He's not being a Master. Actually He's a nice person when He is being a Master too, I think you found Him a little scary though.'

I opened my eyes wide and nodded emphatically.

'Ross happens to be a qualified hypnotherapist and practicing psychologist as well as a lecturer. If you went to Him as a client, you wouldn't be able to play with Him when you were working with Him and anything you told Him would stay between the two of you, even from me, unless you gave Him permission to tell me. Would you think about it over the weekend? I know you're going to be busy, but a clever girl like you should be able to think when you're not running around, yes?'

'Yes Sir, I'll think about it. Oh the rice is going to be ruined!'

I jumped up off His knee and ran back through to the kitchen. The rice had boiled dry and was now stuck to the bottom of the pan in a sticky mess that smelled dreadful. I rushed round the kitchen trying to do a hundred and one things at a time and I ended up dropped the bowl with the eggs in it and smashing them all over the floor. I was screaming with frustration when Sir caught hold of me and held me still.

'Why are you so upset?'

'Because everything is ruined and I dropped the eggs and there aren't any more so you'll have to go out and get more and you've only just got home and you shouldn't have to go out again and get more eggs coz I was stupid enough to drop them all and it's gonna take ages to cook more rice and by then the bacon's gonna to be cold and all sticky and greasy and....'

'And this is not the end of the world as you know it.' He sighed. 'Maybe I'm asking to much of you, you've done so much today, I should have thought before asking you to cook as well.'

'But it's my job, it's on the list.'

'And it is my fault for putting too much on the list. This is not because you are stupid or thick, it is because I have asked too much of you. Now, listen to me. I want you to be quiet for the rest of the day, no more questions, no more blaming yourself. If you need to speak, you will raise your right hand and wait for me to give you permission to speak. Next I want you to get the mop out of the cupboard and clean the floor up while I order some food. Once you have done that, you can clean up the kitchen and then you can eat with me. Is that clear?'

'Ye...'

'Hand!' He ordered.'

I raised my right hand as high as I could and waited for Him to give me permission. He gripped my wrist and pulled my arm down so my hand was level with my shoulders and told me,

'Raise it to there and no further. You may speak.'

'Yes Sir I understand.'

'Good girl. Go and get the mop out and get started.'

A part of me wanted to rebel and shout and stamp my feet and complain that He was bullying me, but it was a very small part and it was quickly squashed by the rest of me that found peace in having my life ordered and structured by Sir. I found it strange that I hated Mother's actions, they weren't that dissimilar to Sir's, but the huge difference was that I trusted Sir. It was the same as when He slapped or spanked me, I knew that He did this for my own good, to help me to deal with how I was feeling and it made me trust Him all the more. I cleaned up the kitchen quickly and the pizza arrived soon after I had finished. Sir called me over to the table and told me to kneel. He had oiled and soaped my new collar while I was busy and He slipped it round me neck, fastening it so it didn't choke me but at the same time it couldn't slide round. Then He handed me a plate with a couple of slices of pizza and told me I should eat it while it was hot. I started to get up but He said very firmly,

'Stay where you are pet. I want you at my feet for the rest of the night.'

And that's exactly where I stayed. When we were finished with our meal He gave me my instructions and went upstairs to His study. I joined Him soon after and curled up on the floor at His feet. That was the last thing I remembered about that day. He must have carried me through to bed because when I woke up it was morning and I could feel His body against my back, His cock nudging at my hip and His fingers on my nipples.