Lot in Life Ch. 01bynaykedanonymous©
PLEASE NOTE: EVERYONE IN THIS STORY IS 18 YEARS OF AGE OR OLDER. IT IS FICTION, AND IN THE REAL WORLD NOBODY SHOULD EVER BE SUBJECTED TO THE BULLYING AND CRUELTY WITHIN THIS STORY; THANKFULLY IN THIS FICTIONAL WORLD SUICIDE ISN'T A REALITY. OK MORBID STUFF OVER. LET THE SEXY STUFF (?) BEGIN.
I was the token doormat amongst my group of so-called friends.
I was shy, quiet, timid, easily embarrassed, and more easily intimidated. I was brought along because I could be counted on to be the butt of a joke, the target of embarrassment, and a designated driver. I didn't see them often -- only when they deigned to call me, when they needed a ride, or they needed a victim.
I knew it wasn't good for me to spent time with people like that, but they were the people my parents expected me to hang out with. Who were invited to parties at our house and we at theirs.
I was so quick to do what I was told, spoke so little when with others, and often said stupid things out of nervousness, that they all though I was stupid. Maybe I was, but, honestly, I thought so little of myself back then that I didn't think I deserved better.
This is a recount of some of the things they did to me for a laugh. At the age of 18, I thought that was my lot in life.
I'd managed to avoid them for the last few weeks; this was easy to do since we'd just graduated high school and I avoided going out -- and they'd not actually called or invited me to anything. That changed when my mother drunkenly called me downstairs one day. "I saw Karma and Heather at the co-op this morning. They told me they were missing you, and I promised you'd go over there tonight for a sleep-over."
That's how I ended up driving over to Karma Boyes' house at 8:30 pm on a warm August evening. Karma answered the door and gave me a fake kiss on my cheek while holding one of my shoulders in each hand. "Well, I guess since you're here, you might as well come back and join us." She turned and walked away, and I meekly followed her down through the large house.
She led me to the back deck, and we found the gang sitting around drinking beer, smoking pot, and talking far too loudly. Karma's family was rich and they lived on a huge property. The noise wouldn't make a difference to her neighbours.
"My parents are away in Vegas this weekend, so I've got the house to myself. My dad told me he was making your dad work this weekend, when I told him we ran into your mom. That sucks to be him. But then my dad's the boss."
What Karma said was true, my dad worked for Karma's father at the largest employer in the county. He'd worked there for 18 years, since the day he finished high-school. He'd taken night courses and worked his way up, but still only made one tenth that of Karma's father, the owner of the company. That was another reason I did what I was told. Like my father, I didn't have many choices. If he pissed off Karma's father, he might get fired -- and he'd definitely get blacklisted. With that company being his only reference of employment, getting another job -- any other job in this county -- would be impossible.
Faces turned toward me, gave me a neutral look here, a smirk there, and returned to their conversations. I made that little difference to them. Well, it was better than laughter and pointed fingers.
I picked up a beer from the counter and walked over to an empty chair near, but well outside, the group. If I'd gotten water, they'd have mocked me. I could just nurse it quietly and stay out of their thoughts; that could help the evening pass quietly.
After an hour of quietly hoping not to be noticed, my hopes were shattered, so to speak.
"I'm bored. Let's play a game," said Jackson, one of Karma's entourage. His dad was on the board of directors at the company my dad worked at, and was a fraternity brother with Karma's father.
Sara, Karma's tied-at-the-hip sidekick, replied sarcastically, "What are we going to do, play monopoly?"
"Well, we could play some drinking games," was Karma's suggestion; her parents bar was an open bar, restocked once a week by a service; her dad never even cared or knew how much she and her friends drank and Karma was always happy to take advantage of that, despite being under the legal drinking age.
"We talked about playing some of the old party games last time...they're always fun, " said Matt.
"Well, we can't with her here, can we?" Everyone's eyes turned to me at Claire's comment. Karma broke an awkward moment of silence as I looked nervously down at my feet, "Sally, you'll play some party games, won't you? I'd hate to have to have my father drive you home because you were being difficult."
I fidgeted nervously, and mumbled "Of course I'll play some games."
"What? I didn't hear you. Speak clearly to me and stop being rude. We're all waiting for you to answer."
I could tell I had made Karma angry, and was quick to say as clearly as I could -- though still with a catch in my throat that, "Yes. I'll do whatever you want."
I heard Claire snicker off to the side, but wasn't able to bring myself to look in her direction.
I couldn't have done anything else. Piss off Karma, and she could complain to her father; there goes his job. Actually most of the people in the room had parents who worked in the same company, and all worked at a higher level in the company than did he. I really couldn't offend any of them.
Karma organized the moving of all furniture out of the middle of the room, and positioned us in a circle on the floor. "Well, what shall we play?" Karma looked around the circle waiting for a suggestion.
Heather was the first with a suggestion, "We could play spin-the-bottle where whoever it lands on has to drink, and if it lands on the spinner, they have to finish their drink." Oh god.
"That's kinda boring. I want to have more fun than that." Karma look around the circle once more.
Jackson suggested making it "strip spin-the-bottle", but thankfully was ignored.
After a few seconds, Sara spoke up, "What about a movie drinking game? You know, where every time a character says or does something, we drink?"
While I remained quiet, that suggestion was shot down with a "Boooring" from Jackson, and a, "Yawn" from Claire.
Heather spoke up again, "You've got a bunch of board games. We can turn any of them into a drinking game."
"Or a strip game," Jackson spouted before pouring himself another drink.
Karma looked thoughtful, "Maybe some of us have had too much to drink," and rolled her eyes at Jackson. I giggled then, and instantly regretted it as her eyes locked onto me. "Well, what's your suggestion?" She said it with condescension in her voice, obviously not expecting me to have anything good.
She was right. "The only...I'm sorry...the only party game I've ever played is musical chairs."
Claire was instantly snide, "Phpphpt, as though she'll stick it out if we play any real game. She'll run and hide. We should send her home now. I'd rather play Russian Roulette."
"Now wait a minute, Claire," said Karma in a thoughtful tone, "she might have an idea that could be fun. I think we could have fun with this, and see if she can not disappoint us and actually stick out the night."
"Well, what do you have in mind? We're not seriously going to play musical chairs, are we?" Claire's sentiment was echoed by the others. I just looked down at the ground in front of me. It's not my fault I've barely been to any parties.
"Here's what I'm thinking," continued Karma. "Those curtains are blackout curtains for when we watch movies. Let's test this. Sara, make yourself useful and flick off those lights." Sara complied as Karma finished drawing the curtains, and we were in utter blackness but for red LEDs coming from the stereo setup in the corner.
"Perfect," Karma's voice, breaking the silence, continued, "You can turn them back on now. Here's what' we're going to do. We're going to a new game I've just invented."
"And what is this new game?" Sara leaned forward. Jackson belched in the background.
"Stop interrupting, and you'll find out." Karma sounded playful now. She walked over to a cupboard, opened up a game within, and came back with six different coloured plastic game pieces. She didn't make us wait long, "I'll pull this lamp over by me. I'll grab a playing piece for each of us. We can reach out in the dark, dropping the piece we have in the middle of the circle as best we can. We count to ten, and each person has to find a piece as fast as they can; once everyone has a piece, we turn on the lights. Are you all with me so far?"
We all nodded, well, I did, still unable to look up and meet her eyes after my stupid game suggestion. And I didn't feel like tonight was going to go well, drinking game or some other type; to go well for me at least.
Our hostess continued, "Well, when we look at the pieces, whoever is holding the black one, has to take off a piece of clothing. We then do it again and again. What do you think?"
Jackson was quick, "I'm game." Of course he was, he had a good chance of seeing some bare flesh. But, really, how far could the game go?
Heather agreed as well, laughing, "Sounds awesome. She was looking toward Jackson as she said it. Sara agreed as well, and Claire finally gave a nod and smile. There was silence, and I looked up to see them all staring at me.
"See, I told you she'd chicken out and ruin things." Claire really didn't realize that I'd do anything to keep my father employed and us living in our home. Playing a game where someone might see my bra was something I thought I could do.
"Awesome, OK, here's a piece everyone." She handed them out, and I realized I was starting with the little red plastic pawn. The lamp went off and Karma called out, "Drop your piece." I followed her instructions, not hearing it land on the soft carpet.
We started counting in the blackness, and despite trying to see through the dark, there was nothing to help me find a piece. At least we were all in the same boat. I only had a 1/6 chance of losing a piece of clothing.
On the count of ten, I was startled by everyone reaching out and laughing as they tried to find a piece. I reached out felling toward the centre of the room, my hand bumping over a few others, and I started to relax sharing the laughter in the dark. People started to call out, "I found one", "OK,", and the like.
The lights were turned on and we all looked. I was relieved to see I held a green piece. Karma held the black one. She let out a little cure, then laughed, took a drink, and pulled off a sock, throwing it into the corner of the room. "That's the discard pile folks. You lose it, there it stays all night." I shivered at that thought, but really, chances are I'd be fine. I mean, they'd stop when someone might actually be exposed.
We played another few rounds, and I ended up losing a sock, as did Claire and Jackson. People were needing more drinks, and Karma sent me on the errand. I was glad to have a moment away from them, to compose myself, to breathe. It didn't take me long to grab the requested drinks at the bar. I ignored their whispers and laughs, content to not be the focus of their attention.
When I returned to the game, they stopped their quiet talking, stopped laughing, and sat up ready to play.
I lost the next round and removed another sock. Soon everyone was down a single sock, and I was down two. Not a good beginning, but the odds were with me, weren't they?
I realized that I'd finished my second beer already, and while the others had drunk more than that, especially Jackson, this was a lot for me. Well liquid courage. I'd have to take off my sweater next time I lost...if I lost again -- one must stay positive.
I lost my sweater after Jackson lost his second sock.
I was starting to get nervous, and was relieved to see Claire lose her second sock as well. Again, except for me having lost my sweater as well, we had all tossed our socks in a pile in the corner.
And then I lost again, and had to remove my dress shirt, glad I was wearing a t-shirt underneath. Within a few more rounds, Jackson was wearing his jeans, whatever was under them, and a t-shirt, Sara was had just taken off her sweater and was, like me wearing a t-shirt. Claire hadn't removed anything else, but Karma and Heather were both in their bras, having removed their t-shirts. I blushed, thankful that I didn't have to do that.
Surely the game would end when one of them might have to bare more.
I lost the next round, and was suddenly faced with taking off my t-shirt and showing off my pale skin and plane white training bra. They all looked at me expectantly, and it was all I could do to force myself to pull the t-shirt over my head, and then to hang my head.
"Wow, your breasts are small." Jackson wasn't holding back.
I was burning up on the inside, barely holding back tears. I closed my eyes and breathed slowly.
"Awe, she's just a slow bloomer. I mean, it's not like she really even needs to worry -- you've never even been on a date, have you?" Claire simply loathed me, it seems, and was very skilled at identifying the most embarrassing things about myself.
I shook my head, and was thankful to Karma who said, "Leave her alone. She's playing the game and keeping up." I was surprised, but willing to go with it. I tried to thank her with my eyes, but she was already reaching for the light.
I lost the next round as well, and found myself faced with having to remove my jeans now. Other than my dad last dressing me as a child, no boy had seen my underwear, not even a male doctor, never. I looked at Karma, hoping she'd take pity and say the game was done, but she just stared at me before finally saying, "Well, I guess you are going to disappoint, and we'll have to stop the game."
I didn't want to upset her, though, and managed to reach down, and unsnap, then unzip my jeans. II laid on my back, and squirmed out of them, feeling horrible humiliation as my plane white cotton underwear came into view.
The others laughed at this, and I heard one of them say, "Well, doesn't she have the most boring underwear." Jackson laughed and said, "This is a great game Karma, thanks."
The odds seemed to have turned in my favour as Jackson ended up wearing just his boxers, and Claire, Heather, and Sara ended up in their bra and panties, just like me. All of them wore matching bra and panty sets and Jackson was enjoying moving his eyes around from chest to chest and ass to ass. He didn't spend much time looking at my flat-chested body.
And then I lost again. My eyes started wandering, but I did my best to keep a blank look on my face and not reflect the horror I felt within me. I undid the clasp at the front of my bra, and slid it off. My breasts, what you could speak of, were barely noticeable, and as an 18 year old girl, I was very embarrassed about their lack of size.
Jackson looked at my chest, "Well, at least the nipples are nice." I think that was the first compliment I've ever received from any of these people.
"My god, you're flat." Claire again. I knew that when topless, my upper body looked more like a skinny guy's than a girl's because of its flatness. At least I had that going for me. I was thin and had nice long hair.
"Keep playing. I'm proud of you pet." Karma reached across the circle and patted my head. I looked up, glad for any positive sign from her. Surely she'd end the game soon.
The next few rounds saw Karma join us in our underwear sets. I sat there stoically, trying not to cover myself too much, or look anyone in the eye. My nipples were hard from the adrenaline coursing through my body. I was so humiliated and knew that I should have just gotten up and left long before now, but also knew that if I did, I could get my father fired. It was agony. All of them were smirking at me, making insulting comments.
I lost. Yeah, the next round, with everyone else now in their underwear, saw me have to remove my white cotton briefs and toss them in the corner. I sat their naked, my arms around my knees and my hair over my eyes.
Jackson whistled, and Sara commented on my abundant light pubic hair. I don't think anyone else, but my female doctor, has seen me nude since I was seven or eight, not even my mother. I tried to cover myself, and at a look from Karma, stopped. It was difficult to remember. I sat there on my heels, kneeling, humiliated.
"Can I get dressed now?" I looked to Karma, glad that the game must finally be over.
"What are you talking about, we play this game until I decide we're done. Besides, you've lost your clothes for the evening anyway."
My jaw must have just hung there, I know I couldn't speak, and I remained stunned as Jackson got up to get more drinks for everyone. He seemed to take his time, and I noticed that his boxers were being pushed out by what struck me as an obscenely large erection.
Claire caught me looking at him and in a whispered laugh, told me, "That's the real reason he gets to hang out with us so much." My eyes must have bulged, which set Claire snorting in disgust, "Shit you're a prude."
I was handed another drink, this time something fruity, and drank it down quickly. I welcomed the burn of the alcohol in my throat and the way things softened and blurred for me. I realized I was swaying on my knees and heard, "God she can't even hold a few drinks." I didn't fall over, but only because I caught myself with my outstretched hands and moved myself to lean against the couch for support.
"I'll drop her piece for her", Heather helpfully offered. I knew what was going on, but felt powerless to put a stop to it. The alcohol had dulled my senses, and I felt more as though I was dreaming.
I listened in the darkness to them drop, count, and collect they plastic pawns, and when the lights came back on, saw that the black one remained on the carpet. I had nothing else to take off, and I didn't see how I could become more humiliated.
"Karm, what now? She's already naked. I never thought she'd go this far."
"Well, no more drinks for her for a bit, or she's likely to pass out. Now, what should be her forfeit?"
Jackson was the one who suggested something, "How about we each take a photo with her." This set the others to laughing away and congratulating him on having a great idea.
Karma left the room, while the others joked about my state of dress, lack of noticeable breasts, and drunkenness. I was glad, then, for the numbing effect of the alcohol, for I didn't shed a tear despite my horror. If a photo of me naked got out into the community, I'd be shamed in our church, at the local Community College, which was all my father could afford, and in front of my family and everyone I knew. I reached out and took a drink from a beer bottle nearby.
I shivered and rubbed my arms to warm up. I realized that the feeling of dizziness I had before had fled, and looked up at the faces staring down at me. "Are we still playing the game, " I questioned with slurred words.
Claire crouched down beside me, and said sweetly, "Of course we are. Do you still want to play?" She confused me then, "You do want keep us all happy, don't you?" I nodded in response to that, and she went on, "Awesome. Now you just lost again, and I need you to try to stand up." Wow, she was being so nice to me, maybe it was OK.
With the help of the couch, I was able to stand up and, miraculously, was fairly steady on my feet. I started giggling, realizing that the people around me were in their underwear. I remember Karma coming back into the room with a fancy camera with a big flash on top of it. And thinking it was funny that she was in her underwear too.
"OK, who's first?" Karma was wanting to get things going, and I still recall the evil glint in her eye as Heather came over and stood beside me. In the photo that was taken, I stood beside her, directly facing the camera, and she stood behind me, peeking around my nude form. Her hand was over her mouth as though she was stifling a laugh. I was completely bared, from flat chest to bushy blonde tuft of hair.