Love (Interrupted) in an Elevator

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She goes down as it goes up.
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It is late, almost 5:00 a.m., when we get back from the clubs. We're both a little sweaty from dancing and more than a little buzzed from the drinks. For the last few hours I've been telling you all the nasty things I want to do as we danced to the hot Latin beats you love, while you ground your ass against me on the dance floor. The few times I was able to squeeze a tit, and the brief over the clothes hand job you gave me at the table have me harder than I can remember being in a long time. Now while we wait for the elevator I can hardly control myself. My hands are all over your ass, hitching up your already short skirt. I'm nibbling on your ear and licking the sweat off your neck when the bell announces the arrival of our lift. I catch your eye as we enter the elevator- you have that naughty look on your face that means I'm about to really enjoy myself.

The second the doors shut and I press the button for 24 you push me against the wall and drop to your knees. Before the light flashes "2" you have my zipper down and I'm balls deep in your throat. I gasp and try to hold onto the rail in the elevator as you bob your head up and down, sucking hard and fast. One hand is on my ass, pulling me deeper, the other teasing my balls. Your tongue is pressed hard to my shaft, and you are humming deep in your throat. By the 3rd floor I vaguely realize that your hand has left my ass and you are working over your clit in short, feverish strokes. My balls have drawn up tight against my shaft; I can feel your fingernails on the hand wrapped around my shaft lightly scratching across them.

Time seems to slow down as I watch the numbers slide by, 6,7,8. You take my cock out of your mouth and I whimper, but it is just so you can take a deep breath. You look up at me and take me deep again. This time instead of humming you pull back and just wrap those luscious lips around the head and flick your tongue across my slit. You are making little grunting sounds deep in your throat- I know you are about to come and I resist the urge to try to push myself in deeper. I can feel the cum boiling its way out of me just as you climax; a deep shudder passes through you and you plunge your head down until your nose is against me, at the same time you reach up and shove your cum slick fingers into my mouth.

Suddenly, somehow, through my haze, I realize two things. The first is that the elevator is slowing down, as if it is going to stop on 20. The second thing is that I am cumming- NOW! I grab your hair and try to both pull you off and hold you on at the same time. The cum rockets out of me, and you make greedy little happy sounds as you suck it into your mouth, letting it pool there the way I know you love. I can't stop coming, but I know that we only have seconds to spare. Just as the elevator comes to a stop and the doors start to slide open you swallow and jump to your feet tugging your skirt back to at least cover your thong.

My still hard penis is sticking out of my pants, and there is no time to put it back in. You press your ass against me, covering my throbbing rod from view and smearing cum on your skirt. The elevator reeks of sex, the smell of sweat, my come and yours swooshes out as the door opens and I can feel the temperature drop a few degrees. Standing in the doorway is an older couple, maybe in their early sixties or late fifties, holding steaming cups of coffee. They seem surprised to see us. Not as surprised as me, though.

They get into the elevator and the woman looks at us, smiles, and says "We like to get up early and take our coffee to the roof to watch the sunrise from the deck." I manage to mumble something about that sounding nice as your hand, which is stuck between us, slides up and down my cum and spit slick shaft. I whimper, and the blood rushes back into my meat. As the final numbers tick off towards our floor I wonder how we are going to get out of the elevator in this condition. It doesn't seem to bother you as you slowly jack me off while making chit chat with our new friends.

As the elevator reaches 24 I start to panic. Slowly you release me and you pull my shirt out of my pants, just enough to cover me (almost) if you stand in front of me. We step out and I start to sigh with relief, until I hear the man stage- whisper "Give her one for me." You hear it too, and swing around to look back, and I realize that a large spot of cum is shining on your cleavage and one tit is almost fully exposed. I couldn't see any of this as you shielded me in the elevator, but I have the distinct idea that you were fully aware of it the whole time. The lady just smiles, and as the door closes I see her reaching for her husbands' zipper and the obvious bulge behind it as she drops to her knees.

I turn to you, dumbfounded and even hornier than I was before we got on the elevator. You kiss me, deep, and I can taste a little of my come in your mouth. Suddenly you pull my face to your chest and order me to lick you clean. I happily comply, and you reach down and take my stiff cock as if it is a leash and lead me to our door. Throwing it open you look back over your shoulder, give me a tug and say

"My turn."

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sexmatesexmateabout 14 years ago
Abandon the first person present tense.

First : Thanks for writing!

This style of writing (FP POV) is hard to read. It makes it seem awkward and un-real.

Your story was short with a certain event taking place.

I am with HDK on this. Write a story with plot that would have included or built up to this event. With character development and dialogue. You won't be sorry.

PistolpackinpetePistolpackinpeteabout 14 years ago
I thought this example of the 1st pp pov....

....much better than most. The key is to lengthen verbiage between uses of course.

HarddaysknightHarddaysknightabout 14 years ago
I always felt that first person in present tense

is difficult to write and to read. The entire story happens now and feels awkward. Keep writing and try to deepen the plots.

Mustang_DreamsMustang_Dreamsabout 14 years agoAuthor
Please comment, all feedback appreciated!

I meant to put this at the top of the story, and thought I had, but it seems I did not. This is my first story for Literotica so any and all feedback, public or private is greatly appreciated. Don't be shy, I have a thick skin! M-D

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