Loving James Ch. 05

I was preparing to ask him if he wanted to come home with me instead of going to classes, but he beat me.

"Want to come back to my place? Watch movies or something?" he asked. "I'm not going to class."

"I'd love to." I told him, and kissed him softly.

We were both quiet on the way back to his house. I think the crying had made him all sleepy or dopey or something, but he didn't seem pissed or angry, so I wasn't worried. I was actually totally the opposite of worried.

Somehow, everything felt really really good.

At his house we headed upstairs. Alex set his laptop up on his desk and I dumped my bag and closed the door and kicked off my shoes.

We agreed (silently, I guess) to watch the movie from his bed again, and when he cuddled right up against me it seemed like the best idea ever.

I lay with my arm around him, and drew patterns on his stomach.

I didn't think much of it. It was just something to do with my hands, a way to touch him and be closer to him. I certainly hadn't thought of it as sexual until my fingertips strayed too close to his nipple and he arched towards my hand.

He turned to looked at me, his eyes dark and smiling, so I gently kissed him.

Our lips met hesitantly, softly, almost as if this was the first kiss we'd ever shared. I felt like I was exploring him, discovering him, all over again. Alex's fingers danced along the side of my face and slid into my hair and he parted his lips slightly. I angled slightly more to the side and slipped my tongue forward, delicately tasting him. I teased his tongue briefly and he made a beautiful breathy whimper and tightened his fingers in my hair.

He began kissing me back with more certainty and slid one leg up to wrap over my hips, and I let myself touch him where I wanted to; down his back, his sides, the backs of his thighs, his chest and lastly his butt. I only stroked, urged him a little closer.

I kissed across his face and gently nibbled his earlobe. Alex squirmed and sighed softly.

He seemed content to kiss for a while longer, but then he began to demand more. His body was shifting against mine more obviously, his tongue was greedy and his hands were getting bolder. And we were both hard against each other.

He pulled away, flushed and breathing hard. The pink of his cheeks clashed terribly with his hair. I thought it was adorable.

He pressed soft lips to my throat, scraped his teeth lightly over my skin. A shiver ran through me. He lightly nibbled up the side of my neck, then moved to press a kiss against my lips.

Alex's mouth opened for me, invited me to taste him and tease with my tongue. He made soft irregular noises of pleasure, little indistinct whimpers of need that went straight to my groin.

"James?" He asked. He was basically on top of me now, and there was no doubt in my mind about was what was going to happen.

"Yes." I murmured back to him.

Alex smiled. I smiled back. He didn't need to ask for anything more than that.

"Yes." He said, and his eyes were smiling too. "Finally." He added then, giving me a push.

I laughed and pulled him to kiss me again.

Alex moved against me, hungry again, but somehow more gentle and restrained than before. This felt right. This felt perfect.

I slid my fingers into Alex's hair, wrapped my legs around his. Our jeans weren't exactly ideally comfortable for this, but I didn't care. It didn't matter anyway.

He hummed softly as we kissed, beginning to rub against me. I was getting harder, but this was quiet and soft and comfortable. This was right.

When I found the hem of his t shirt I pulled it upwards. Alex moved so I could pull it off over his head, and I tossed it over the edge of the bed.

His chest was lean and I shifted us so he was on his back and I was the one lying on top of him. Alex smiled at me, and I kissed him again. I would have kept going, but he was tugging on my shirt and I sat up, straddling his waist, to pull off.

"Hm?" Alex murmured, smiling up at me while he stretched his arms over his head and giving me a sexy look.

He made me laugh, so I kissed him, sweeping my tongue into his mouth. His fingers slid into my hair, and I moved down his body. He exposed his neck to me so I could mark it, but I had a sweeter prize in mind.

I moved down to the nipple I'd neared when I was drawing on his stomach, and sucked it into my mouth.

"Hmm..." Alex mumbled, pushing his body up against mine. I toyed with it with my tongue for a moment, then bit him. "Agh," He jerked up under me, pressing his groin up under mine. And then he was scrabbling at my jeans.

It seemed harder than before to get out of our jeans. Something about being under the covers, maybe. We both got onto the covers again, moving around and finally getting rid of our clothes.

Alex's arms pulled me back to him. He was smiling, glorious.

"James..." He murmured, kissing my face. His hands on my butt pulled our hips together. I rocked against him. He was giving little gasps which made me hungrier for him, and then he slid a hand in between us and wrapped his fingers around both our cocks.

I felt like I was going to come, then and there. His cock against mine like this felt amazing.

Alex groaned and demanded I kiss him again.

I was only too happy to oblige.

We made out like that for a while, and then he moved, leaning across the bed to his bedside table, reaching into the drawer. I was too busy marvelling at the view to really think much about what he was doing.

Until, that is, Alex produced a bottle of lube, took my hand and squeezed some onto my fingers.

"So?" he said, shuffling back on the bed so he knelt chest to chest with me and looking at me, a challenge in his eyes. I stroked my other hand down his spine, kissed him lightly as my fingers slid between his cheeks. Alex shifted closer, arched his back more so I could reach better.

I stroked his puckered hole with an unlubed finger, feeling his fingers tighten where he had his hands behind my shoulders. His breathing quickened over my skin as I ran little circles around him.

I changed hands. I stroked him briefly with my slick finger, his hips moving back slightly every now and again. I obeyed his silent encouragement and pressed my finger against him. He 'mm'ed softly as I pushed into him, and my dick got even harder. He felt velvet smooth and incredibly hot. Alex pressed back against my finger and kissed my shoulder.

"Two." He murmured. "Use two." I slowly withdrew my finger accompanied by a soft sigh from Alex, this time inserted two. He moaned and pressed back against my fingers. I tried to rotate them inside him, but I wasn't entirely sure how I did. Alex was starting to slowly hump back against my fingers though, murmuring softly into my neck.

"Like that?" I found myself whispering past my dry mouth.

"Mm-hm. Yeah. Just like that." Alex confirmed breathily, still undulating on my hand. He looked up at me and smiled. "Curl your finger, yeah?" he asked. I crooked my fingers slightly, not wanting to do anything that might hurt him, but it was pretty clear that pain was the last thing on his mind. He bit his lip and let out a soft groan, his eyes squeezed closed.

Ah. I smiled and began to repeatedly touch that spot. Alex gave a needy cry and clung to me with hard fingers, arching his head back, his mouth falling open.

"Oh god," he groaned when I pulled my fingers away. I circled his hole again and he looked up at me. His cheeks were flushed but his grin was huge. He slid his hands back around me and down my chest. My stomach flinched as he continued down, and I moaned softly as he wrapped his hands around me.

I shivered at the sensation when Alex rolled a condom over me with a steady hand, looked at me with shining eyes.

His skin was golden in the soft light, luminous. He lay back across the bed and stretched his arms behind his head. He was smiling. He actually looked like he was having fun. This was how it was supposed to be.

"Ready?" he asked huskily. If my dick bobbing in front of me was any indication, then 'yes' was an understatement.

I moved onto the bed with him, kissed him, propped on all fours above.

"L-lube?" I asked. My voice sounded disgustingly unlike me. Alex passed me the bottle and I took it with slightly shaking hands.

He stuffed a pillow under his hips and I moved between his legs.

"You won't hurt me." Alex's eyes were trusting. Serious.

His hands pulled me closer and the head of my cock bumped against his puckered hole.

"God, I need you so bad," he hissed, fingers digging into me as he tried to pull me closer.

Alex moaned as I pushed into him. I looked at his face quickly to make sure I wasn't hurting him, and his expression just made me harder. His head was thrown back in complete abandon and his hands were clutching the pillow either side of his head so hard that his fingers were white.

"Yes," he hissed, hitching me closer, his heels digging into me from behind. I sank deeper inside him, breathless with wonder. He was hot and tight and felt so incredibly good that I thought I might combust there and then. He moaned softly and opened his eyes again.

His fingers reached out and touched my face, and he managed a smile at me. "Babe... ok?" I nodded. My heart was thundering harder than ever before in my life and I panted for breath.

Pleasure was rushing through me in a torrent. He was so tight, so hot around me. If I moved I was in grave danger of coming right then and there.

"Babe." He whispered. "James?"

"I'm going to cum. I can't-"

"If you fucking cum now-" Alex growled, which only made me laugh. He felt incredible. I couldn't believe this. I never wanted this to end. I pushed forward again, sinking deeper into him. His hands clutched my hips.

"Ungh-" Alex arched up off the bed. I didn't move. I was already deep inside him. His mouth fell open and I took it as an invitation to kiss him.

Alex kissed me back eagerly, his hands grasping my back.

His body arched again, this time pushing his hips even closer to mine.

I couldn't even begin to catch my breath. He was so hot, so tight.

"James," he whispered, his legs hitching up around my body so I somehow sank further inside him, right against him. "M-move. Please."

"Oh god," I breathed. "Alex..." He whimpered and I began to slowly pull out of him. His cock was hard against his stomach and it made me feel incredibly gratified, incredibly sexy, that I could do this to him. That I could make him feel this way.

I pushed back into him, gasping with the sensation of it. He was so tight, so hot, so slick and there was heat bursting all over my skin, running through my veins.

"Yes," Alex hissed, his hands stroking my back.

He felt so amazing I thought I was going to burst. How had it taken a drunken kiss for me to realise how gorgeous he was? How much I liked him? Alex was perfect, every movement against me and every soft gasp just confirmed it. This was perfect.

"Please, more." Alex moaned. "I need more, James..."

"You feel so good," I choked, picking up some speed.

"Yes..." Alex tilted his head back as he arched and I panted for breath. "More, James..." I tried to speed up again, but I was losing control.

"Al, I'm going to cum, I can't- I'm so close..."

"Me too," Alex hissed. "So close- oh god oh god..."

I reached between us and began to stroke him as I kept thrusting into him. Alex let out a couple of high whimpers and suddenly he was spilling into my hand and his butt- his muscles were contracting around me and he was so damn hot in that moment...

Before I knew it I was coming too, coming deep inside him as he wailed beneath me and the world stopped just for a moment...

There'd never been a moment like that one. It was somehow eternal, and over way too fast. But I'm pretty sure moments like that cause quite a few heart attacks.

Yeah. It was like that. Heart stopping.

Alex let out a couple of soft noises, his arms loosening their grip on me and started kissing my face.

I kissed him back, never ever wanting to let him go. We kissed until I started to slip, having softened too much to stay inside him. Alex grabbed his shirt and gave it to me.

I gently kissed my way down his body and wiped up at the same time.

When I was done Alex pulled me half on top of him and wrapping me so tight in his arms I wondered if he ever planned on letting go. I had my arms draped loosely around him.

He suddenly looked up with a funny look on his face and licked his lips. "Good?" he asked softly. I loved the way he went all shy on me.

"Honestly?" I asked, running my fingers through his hair. He nodded once, looking down. "I'm actually not sure if I'll ever recover." Alex grinned, but didn't roll his eyes or comment. Instead he gave me a soft lingering kiss and then settled back down with a soft sigh.

"Can you believe it hasn't even been a week yet? It feels like longer."

"Stop moving." Alex grumbled. "And if you turn into one of those people that celebrate every week together then I may have to hurt you."

"You're cute when you're grouchy."

"Fuck off." He said, and this time he tried to poke me.

I grinned and stole another kiss from him. "And you know," I went on, moving his lips near his ear. "You're hot when you're angry."

"Shut up!" He said loudly, looking shocked. I laughed and pulled him for another kiss.

This time he relaxed into it.

"Here's the thing." I started softly when we pulled back. The shocked look Alex gave me alerted me that this probably wasn't what he'd expected to hear from me. But this was something I really needed to say.

Alex:

"Here's the thing." James said softly.

WHAT? I stared at him, suddenly frozen with shock. Dammit, couldn't there be a happily ever after without a 'but'? "I don't want this to come out wrong." He said with a sigh and gave me a serious look.

"Fuck you." I hissed, sitting up. He was going have sex with me in my bed and then bring up a 'but'? Not if I could help it.

"Wait, wait," he sat up behind me and grabbed me around the waist before I could get out of bed.

"Let go," I demanded. Fuck.

"No, Alex, wait. It's nothing bad, I just- wanted to talk." His arms were really warm and his chest was really solid and comforting against my back. Could I believe him? "Babe," he murmured and kissed the side of my head.

"What?" I finally demanded softly.

"Babe," James repeated. "I didn't mean to freak you out. I know you're scared, but I'm -- I'm scared too." I let my hands rest on his. James nuzzled my hair. I let him. it was actually really soothing. "I know we've made a mess of things so far... but I'm ok with it all. As long as we keep trying. And I wasn't lying the other day. When I said you needed to trust me. It's just that... there's something that I need from you, too."

I swallowed hard and closed my eyes. He sounded so serious, so calm.

"Like what?" I asked finally, feeling smaller stupider all the time. What the fuck could he want from me? I had nothing to offer. How easy had that been for him? Comfort me and get sex and now bail?

"I need to know how you feel, Alex." He breathed against my cheek. I closed my eyes. How could I tell him? "I need to know that this isn't a joke. I know hasn't been long but this feels like it's been ages already and I don't want to be guessing." Heat was climbing my cheeks. "This is... this is really important to me."

I looked at James over my shoulder. He didn't look so calm now. He looked worried. Upset, even.

"I'm in love with you." The words sort of escaped on their own. I certainly hadn't mean to say them. They just came out without any sort of thought or effort on my part.

James looked surprised.

Shit shit shit. Too early.

Christ, what was I thinking? How could I have said that already?

"Good." James said, but his voice was all funny.

What?

"You wanted to know!" I said angrily, pushing his arms off me and getting up. "Don't get all cold and distant because I didn't answer with what you wanted to hear. You asked, ok? So-"

"Alex-" James said and the prick was smiling. He got up and stepped towards me. Ha. I stepped away again.

"No- you act all worried that I think this is a joke after everything I said to you the other day and now you're laughing at me? Again? Well you know what? You can fucking-"

"Shh." James interrupted, grinning now and reached out and put his hand over my mouth to shut me up.

"Don't 'shh' me!" I pushed his hand away.

"I just want to get a word in-"

"Your dirty great hand isn't-"

"Alex?" James said suddenly, very sweetly, with a smile. Possibly the only thing that might have made me stop.

I stopped. Shut my mouth. "Sorry." I muttered, then wondered what for.

"Alex." James went on gently. "I kind of figured it out this morning. When I couldn't call you or anything. It just made me realise... that ... I'm in love with you too."

I blinked at him. Sick relief made me stupid. "And you couldn't have just said?" I demanded.

Thankfully James just laughed. "Shut up and let's go back to bed."

I poked my tongue out at him. James grabbed me and planted a kiss on my lips.

"We're going to be fine." He whispered.

"You reckon?" I asked. How could he be so sure?

"I reckon." He answered. I held him tightly.

I really really hoped so.

"This is really important to me. I want this forever." I managed. His eyes were soft and he kissed me lightly.

"This is important to me too. I'm not letting it go without a fight." James nuzzled my cheek and I smiled, let myself touch his face.

James pressed another kiss to my mouth. "I love you." He whispered.

I found myself grinning despite myself. "Yeah, yeah." I said, rolling my eyes. James gave me a hard look. I gave him one back. "I loved you first." I told him sharply.

That made him smile. "I guess I have to give you that."

And somehow I couldn't stop myself from smiling back either.

James:

I think we dozed off. The sound of the door opening alerted me, and I looked up as Sal peeped through the crack.

His mum and aunt had definitely not been home before. Absolutely must have dozed off. At least, I was really hoping so.

"We're sleeping, go away." Alex mumbled, and I realised that at some point he'd pulled the doona and sheets over us- and thank god. She might have got a shock otherwise... I knew his mum and aunt liked me, but seeing me naked in bed with their beloved Alex might have been stretching things. Especially given that we didn't just happen to be innocently naked... and we didn't just happen to be in bed...

Sal retreated with a quick smile.

"We're not sleeping." I murmured, and pressed my lips to the back of Alex's neck. With the way we were curled up together it was the closest part of him to my mouth. He sighed softly and waited until I'd finished before he replied.

"Well, we were." He retorted. "And by the way, I guess no one's ever told you, but you snore."

"Do not."

"You fucking do to." He glared at me over his shoulder.

"Shut up." I decided that kissing him was the best way to end this conversation. His mouth was slick and hot. He tasted sweet- so sweet and soft that unless I'd known, I never would have guessed how sharp his tongue was.

Alex seemed content to kiss more gently for a while anyway, but eventually his stomach rumbled and he pulled back to give me an apprehensive look. I grinned at him.

"Hungry?" I asked. "I can take you out for a late supper and a movie."

"We are so not going anywhere." He shot back with a glare. I smiled. He was being extra bitchy after the heart to heart we'd had (well, I'll call it that since I wasn't sure I'd ever get any closer to one with Alex), and it made me irrationally happy. "Why are you smiling like that?" he asked suspiciously.