tagReviews & EssaysMajgen Ch. 000

Majgen Ch. 000


I am posting chapter 000 in the hope that it will make people stop reading my 'Majgen'.


The story about Majgen Rahan is very dear to me.

In 2008 when I first started submitting Majgen to literotica I knew absolutely nothing about writing. I do mean nothing. I had barely a clue about punctuation either.

The thought that anyone at all would want to read my stories was still alien, exhilerating and unbelievable.

I'd been making up stories in my head since I was about thirteen, I had just never told anyone about them. Majgen was the shortest, complete, story, that I had ever made up. It only lasted for about two months of daydreaming. So, since my BIG story had lasted for years of daydreaming, I figured that Majgen would be far easier to write.

Majgen was, before it started coming into words, merely a practice project. A stepping stone. Something that could teach me how to write for the purpose of eventually getting started on a BIG project.

Sometimes looks are deceiving. I guess the same holds true for daydreams. Majgen turned out to be a huge project. I have more than 300 000 words of Majgen, and it is not yet complete.

When I first started submitting Majgen, I had every intention of posting the whole thing. Along the way, two things happened. The one was that I got frustrated with submitting chapters that could be so much better with more time and effort, the other was that people started convincing me that I should get it published for real.

Somehow they, in particular my best friend, (whose voice matters more to me than I can tell in one paranthesis,) managed to convince me that 'Majgen' had a real chance to be published for real. A while after I had grown to believe those statements, I gave in to the dream of publishing and stopped posting Majgen.

The early Majgen-readers were very supportive, yet, the heavy feeling of guilt never really left. Since chapter 001 I had promised to post the whole thing.

To soothe my conscience, I clung on to my second promise: To one day send the completed books to those early readers who wanted it.

So, I stopped submitting Majgen to lit. And then the real work began. I had to complete the trilogy, and I had to learn to write.

I've spent thousands of hours working on Majgen. I've smiled, and wept, and poured my soul into it. I've edited like a madwoman, applying over and over again every new thing I learned about the craft.

But then... There had to be a but.

Some months into 2009 my eyes started giving up on me. I had trouble concentrating while reading, hence very big trouble concentrating while writing. After a while I had trouble reading at all. Over the next many months I spent a lot of money on glasses, pair after pair, to get something that would enable me to write again.

Long story short, about a year later, it was evident that my eyesight issues are eyestrain issues, and can't be helped. I already have (and had all along) the perfect glasses for my eyes. I can in fact (when my eyes are not strained) see better than most. The last eye-doctor was very impressed by how tiny letters I can read (when my eyes aren't strained).

Sadly, for my eyes not to be strained, I have to not have looked at a computer screen for days. And, also sadly, writing by hand wears my eyes out too.

I'm working on learning to write in spite of my eye issues. I've come far enough that I am now able to write stories such as 'Moth'. Moth was written over two (maybe three) weeks. Each chapter is very short and straightforward enabling me to keep mental track without notes. The wording is intentionally simple, lessening the need for editing/rewriting.

For me it was amazing that I was able to write it. It was only possible because I wrote it all out in one creative two-(maybe three)-week spurt.

Majgen is different. Majgen is a trilogy which, if ever completed, will consist of three long, wordy, books. It has stories within stories; intertwining fates; politics; intriges; and an immense plethora of characters. It requires immense amounts of editing and rewriting.

To add new pieces to it, I have to be completely immersed in the universe and the story, which has proven difficult now that reading it end to end takes more than a week, (computerized loudreading is insufferably slow compared to reading with eyes).

Again, long story short. I haven't figured out how to resume work on Majgen.

I'm drifting back and forth. My eyes are strained today, making it hard for me to remember which line of thought I was meant to follow here.

In reminder, to both you and me: I am adding this 'Majgen 000' to make people stop reading Majgen. Someone will probably comment that I should just take it down. There's two reasons why I don't. One is that the dated posts on lit is one way in which I can prove the story is mine. The other reason is that some of the old Majgen readers still return here to reread it.

I still, after all this time, get feedback on 'Majgen', sometimes from people who are in the middle of reading it, sometimes from people who has reached the end and only then noticed the warnings that the rest will not be up. It tears at my heart every single time.

So, please, stop reading Majgen. Go away. You'll either not like it, in which case reading it is utterly pointless. Or you'll get caught up in it and want the rest, which isn't there.

If you've read this far, you have probably noticed that I, the writer, am odd. You're not mistaken. That's just how it is. I don't know how to be likeable, I only know how to be me.

So here I go, exposing myself to all the nasty things that happen when I address people directly.

I hope it's worth it.

Please don't read Majgen.

Thank you.

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