Making an Exhibition of Myself Ch. 01-04

1. Making an exhibition of myself

My husband, Andrew, decided that we were to move to the country and he would commute. I loved the new house, it was much bigger and nicer. It meant I had to give up my job though. He was in favour of that too, though I missed the interaction and some feeling of worth. But it was nice in many ways not working and it felt much safer here.

I threw myself into redesigning and decorating. Very gradually I began to meet people too. The first was a woman down the same lane as that on which our house stood, Angela. I didn't see her often and, before she moved away, our friendship wasn't deep, but she did introduce me to a local women's group.

The first time I attended I sat quietly with Angela and watched and listened as everyone else chatted, ate a light lunch and drank. It wasn't amazingly interesting but there was a woman there who caught my attention. She was about 10 years older than me and, though not a classic beauty, certainly was beautiful in her own way. She was much taller than me, even sitting down, and had deep blue eyes and a dark bob, It was obvious, too, that although not everyone liked her, everyone listened to and took notice of her. She exuded a sense of intelligence and power that was compelling.

I found out her name was Jane.

The second time I was to attend the group Angela pulled out. Her mother was very ill and she had to go and look after her. Initially I decided not to go but on the day I changed my mind. I found myself sitting just opposite Jane and from the moment I sat down felt her eyes on me. Although her gaze was not aggressive, she even smiled, I felt that I had made some mistake or was sitting in someones place. I looked down not wanting to cause offence, though I was very aware of all that was said and most of that which wasn't.

At the end, as people were leaving and saying goodbyes and before I could leave unobtrusively, Jane came over and introduced herself.

"You were with Angela last time weren't you?" For a while I just stood there, gazing at her, until I couldn't hold her eyes anymore and dropped my eyes.

"Yes. My name is Jennifer. I'm new to the village, or quite new. Angela has had to look after her mother. I don't know anyone else." I felt her eyes on me and I felt I sounded a little pathetic. I would have dashed off if I hadn't felt held by her presence.

"Its nice to have such a pretty little thing as a new addition." I felt my face blush hotly. I wasn't used to compliments. "Next time, come early and sit next to me. I'll hold your hand."

In bed that night, as my husband snored beside me, I couldn't get her out of my mind. She had a large wedding ring on her hand though that was her only jewellery except topaz stud earrings. She obviously was a regular at the gym. She had long trouser clad legs, breasts a little larger than mine behind a brightly white pressed cotton blouse, long manicured fingers and a powerful gaze.

The next time I arrived early as I had been instructed and found she arrived just after me. We sat down together. My mouth was dry as I tried to spit the words for 'hello' out. I felt silly but she was pleased that I had come early and she did sit with me. Again, when everyone was there, I didn't say much, only answering direct questions about myself to others and asking of them. I could feel Jane's leg against mine though we didn't speak to each other after we sat down but I felt safer with her, what felt like, protective presence. I couldn't stop fussing over my hair and my face was aching smiling so much.

After the lunch Jane decided that we would go back to her place and have coffee. Her old farm house was large, and modern yet comfortable inside. Two border collies lay in the sun by the door and wagged their tails as the saw her. I was very impressed by the overall design of the house, the block colours and the relationship of attention seeking items and space.

We sat drinking delicious coffee in the kitchen. She turned her full attention on me now we were alone. She asked questions about me non stop, wanting to know where I was from, how I grew up and my present circumstances. She seemed caring and genuine and made me feel relatively important which was an unusual situation for me. I became more and more at ease, though I still couldn't keep eye contact with her as she seemed so strong and I felt she could read me. I found I wanted to please her.

After we had been talking for about an hour she asked me about my husband and I told her all I could. Eventually she asked, "Does he satisfy you?" I was quite shocked but after becoming used to answering so fully previously it just seemed to pop out.

"Well, he thinks he does. But not really. In fact not really at all." She laughed which made me laugh and any tension disappeared.

"Do you have anyone else who does?" My eyes widened.

"No. No... not at all."

Outside, as I was about to leave I asked her to visit me so I could return the favour. We agreed on an afternoon in a few days when she was free, it wasn't as though my diary commitments were a problem.

An oldish man appeared.

"Oh this is Tom. He helps me around the land. Tom, this is Jennifer." He nodded and I smiled.

"Francis Derwent wants me and the dogs to help him." He had a dour Yorkshire accent.

"No, thats not a problem." Jane replied. "Francis Derwent. Does he talk politics to you?"

"He tries, Ma'am."

We both laughed. Those three words seemed to sum up everything it was possible to know about Toms feelings about Francis Derwent, politics and Jane. It was obvious he didn't say much, but what he did was loaded. He looked at the dogs and they got up, looked at Jane and trotted off behind Tom.

"The Holdsworths, both help me. His wife, Beth, helps me in the house too."

"Does your husband help on the farm?" She looked off into the distance a moment.

"No. He died."

"Oh I am sorry." My face aflame.

"No need." She turned back to me. "Next time I would prefer it if you don't wear trousers or jeans. Wear a skirt or dress. You have beautiful legs. I saw them the first time and I don't want you hiding them again. Don't wear tights either. Wear stockings. Something that makes you feel ready to be naughty and available." She laughed and so did I and nodded to her as I did so feeling quite taken aback. She kissed my cheek and I was about to go when

That night I thought about her forcefulness and how it made me feel more capable of doing things. I knew I needed the strength of others often and she certainly had it in abundance. Did she really think I had beautiful legs? Hers would be far nicer than mine I was sure and much longer. And why did she want me to feel naughty? I knew I was a bit of a prude and not very adventurous. Maybe Jane wanted me to become more adventurous, even naughty. But what could she mean about being available? It sounded as though she meant sexually. Did she mean sexually naughty? And who with? Her? I shivered. My nipples were hard I realised. I wanted sex but Andrew was asleep and he would only get me half way there I knew. I would have to wait till the morning until he had gone. I tossed and turned for what seemed like hours until sleep finally came.

Jane arrived with a bottle of chilled wine exactly on time. I was nervous and a glass or two of wine would relax me I knew. She complimented me on my shirt dress and I felt really grateful. She wore a variation of her crisp blouse and trousers that she normally did. Feeling quite girly I took her into the kitchen and uncorked the bottle before taking it and Jane into the sitting room.

Her smile and general chit chat relaxed me too. Soon I could feel my heart returning to normal. I poured us both some wine and we sat sipping.

"You have a delightful way of keeping your eyes lowered but you must remember to look at me when you smile. You don't want to look sly do you?"

"Oh no. Sorry."

"Did you do the rest of what I asked?"

"Yes." Just getting the word out, then needing to continue to fill the silence. "I found an old suspender belt and stockings I had never worn. I thought that might be 'naughty' enough. Is that all right?" Words gushing out. Cheeks red. Wanting her to be pleased. I had worried about what to wear for days. I had spent hours on my make up and worrying about it before that.

"Good. And do you feel naughty and available?"

"Yes." My eyes on my knees, too embarrassed to look up.

"Show me." My eyes jerked up to her in shock before returning to my knees. "I told you I wanted to see your beautiful legs. We can do both at the same time. Stand up." She was so self assured and I felt so lacking. She overawed me. Her confidence and the expectation that I would do as she said. She was telling me what to do, I knew that, but she was smiling and it didn't feel as if she was bullying me. But she was telling me what to do. I stood up. I was virtually standing right in front of her. I felt my breathing was rapid, my bra tight. The skirt of my dress was above my knees, my hands grasping each other nervously in front of me. I couldn't believe what I was being asked to do but somehow Jane's authority made it seem almost normal.

"Good girl. Now do as I said. You want to do as you are told and please me don't you?"

"Yes." Whispered. For some reason she knew I did.

My hands unclasped awkwardly and reached down for the hem. I lifted it. I could just see the tops of my stockings.

"That's good. It's easy isn't it? Now higher. All the way up."

Not knowing how I managed it I pulled my dress up to my waist. I felt so exposed. The full length of my legs on view, the tarty looking suspender belt, the new expensive stockings, the sky blue silk knickers that clasped my mound and hopefully did not show I was damp down there. I could feel the slight cool above my stockings, I could feel her looking at me. I could feel her eyes on me like a soft caress. I didn't know why but I wanted desperately for her to like my legs, like what she saw. I was made to turn around, making sure my dress was still high at the back too. Then back as I was. She seemed to look at me for ages.

"That was a good girl. You have delightful legs. You'll show me again when I want to see them, won't you?" I nodded in a mixture of humiliation and pride at her compliments. "Now you can drop your skirts and sit with me again. Take another drink."

Gratefully I dropped my skirts and sat down. I took a drink and gulped too much, reducing myself to coughing, feeling like a little girl.

"Now I was thinking of what you said about your husband. About him not satisfying you, nor was anyone else. So I take it you need to masturbate a lot? How often do you do it and how?"

I stared. It was so personal. It was humiliating. But I had just done what she told me. I hadn't much of a choice but I had accepted it, she hadn't forced me. It seemed silly to question it anymore. I had accepted showing my legs, accepted that she could tell me what to do. I'd even accepted wearing what she had said earlier. It just all seemed to be what I had to do. I was sitting down now, covered up so it was easier, only one thing to do at a time now, only answer her questions.

I knew my face was burning but I could cope with that. I had never even admitted masturbating to anyone in my life. Now I had to not only admit it but discuss it. I couldn't let my eyes go near her face.

"Oh not often," I said evasively but she sat there waiting. "About once a day." My voice was breaking, my face radiating. I couldn't admit to more.

"And do you use anything? Vibe or anything?"

"No. I thought it might be found. I couldn't cope."

"I think you underestimate yourself. So only your fingers?"

I nodded.

"You realise I checked what you were wearing." My eyes opened wide in shock as this registered. What she meant. What she might ask.

"Why are you doing this to me?" I found the courage to ask and look at her even though I knew my voice sounded rather pleading. She looked back at me, smiling, confident.

"I'm not doing anything. You are doing it. Have I made you do anything?"

I looked down again. Shook my head.

"The question you need to ask is why you are doing these things. And perhaps why I thought you would. All I will say is that I am pleased by your obedience so far." I nodded at her.

That struck me hard. Jane had instinctively realised this subservient streak before I was even aware of it. Apart from anything else that put me slightly in awe of Jane, made me almost eager to submit.

She left soon after. At the door she came to kiss me goodbye but this time it was on my mouth and her arms enfolded me. Initially due to the surprise I realised my lips were closed but when our lips met and, though I tried to keep mine closed, Jane's tongue opened mine and it seemed to confirm her control of me. My shoulders were pressed against the wall as the intimate contact heated me up and I realised my hips had pushed out against her. There was something about the older woman that was difficult to resist and just the thought of being under her control was hypnotic. I was being obedient as she had noted. It felt sexual. I felt hot.

Before she drove off she told me that she would text me to invite me over to her house in the coming days. If I decided against it, that was fine. She wanted me to be there but she would hold no grudges and not breathe a word if I didn't. If I went I needed to realise how it might progress and what she might expect. I wasn't certain what she meant but thought I did.

I was shaking. I went to have a long bath. Undressing I saw my blue knickers were very wet, my lips bloated and my nipples hard. In the hot water I cupped my sex. Why was I doing what she wanted? I didn't know. I had never been with a woman before. All right I had played a couple of times with friends as a young teenager and sometimes had fantasies with women but I was married and they were only fantasies. She was married too. My sex throbbed. I couldn't help but rub it. Why was she asking these things of me? Did she really find me beautiful, arousing? She looked at me. She wanted to see me under my skirts. Did she want more? Of course she did. Did I? I grunted, my hips rose in the water and my feet cramped tight as I just stopped myself cumming. She wanted me to do as I was told. She had told me she was pleased with my obedience. Did I want that? A little voice came back in the affirmative. I did. It was arousing. I didn't know what she would do, expect of me. Yes, that was arousing too. She would be in control. She could handle that. I certainly couldn't. I came suddenly, spilling water onto the floor.

Two days later whilst shopping I received a text.

"Hi, fancy a chat and stuff? My place tomorrow 10.00 am. Don't be late. Wear what I like. J.x"

I decided that I couldn't go. She was a woman. It might get out of hand. But I drove up at her house with only a minute to spare and rushed to the door. Jane answered the door in her unperturbed manner and led me inside. The dogs were nowhere to be seen.

"So you wanted to see me again?"

"Yes."

"Even though you knew I would make demands of you?"

"Yes." Blushing uncontrollably.

"What would you do if you knew I wished to see your legs again?"

"I would show you." Her eyebrows arched questioningly.

Blushing hotly, I slowly reached for the hem of my navy skirt and lifted it high. I showed her my legs, my hold up stockings and almost my red knickers. Smiling she sat on the sofa and contemplated me.

"A little higher I think." I was a little shocked but pleased too. And excited.

"Did you think about me in the last couple of days?"

"Yes."

"Did you touch yourself to those thoughts?"

"Er... well... Yes."

"More than once?"

"Y... yes."

She grinned.

"Is there anything else that you think I would like to look at?" She was certainly able to press my buttons, shame me, excite me. I knew I wanted to please her now.

"Would you like to see my, erm, my breasts?" It seemed such a forward thing for me to say. I wouldn't normally do this, it was way past my normal boundaries but she seemed to have steamrollered through all of them.

"Are you telling me you'd like to show me your tits?"

"Yes. If you want me to."

"All right. Show me."

I wondered what to do with my skirt, whether to let it drop while I unfastened my blouse. I knew I was thinking of the small things and letting her control the larger picture of what I was doing. I decided to tuck the hem into the waist band, leaving my legs bared. Trying to control my fingers I slipped each button free and opened my blouse for her. Her eyebrows rose questioningly. I slipped my blouse over my shoulders and let it drop. Her brows were still raised and I slipped my hands behind my back and unfastened my new black lacy bra. Very nervously I let it fall from my tits. I was showing my tits. To Jane. They throbbed. I was hiding my face behind my hair. I felt very young.

"Oh slightly puffy nipples." I blushed further. "You have very nice tits, girl. Nice and pert and thrusting. Do you like showing me your tits? See, you like being naughty and available don't you?"

"Yes." I was nodding like a toy dog.

"Yes what?" She snapped suddenly. "Stop simply saying yes."

"Sorry. I, err, do like showing you my tits and, yes, I do like feeling naughty and available."

"Available? For me?" I realised I was getting deeper into this and had no idea where I was going.

"Yes. For you." I had only really got used to showing her my body and the embarrassment seem to amplify my arousal.

"You have delightful tits. It is a crime to keep them hidden, tucked away in that bra. They should be free, they are lovely and firm. Free to bounce and be touched." I blushed even redder than before. I felt really naughty displaying myself like this with my skirt tucked high and my tits out. Naughty. Slutty. Aroused. Especially as we both could see my nipples were hard and very erect.

Her hand came out and caressed my nipple and I gasped. Then she squeezed it, enough to make me gasp louder and my nipple to throb.

"I am going to enjoy playing with these, aren't I?"

"Yes." My answer seemed to linger in the air, an implied acceptance of giving her the right to play with my tits. I could feel my body shaking slightly. I couldn't stop it. She smiled.

"Yes what?"

"Yes you are going to... going to... going to have fun playing with my tits."

"Now, you want to show me more, aren't you?" I looked at her quickly before dropping my eyes, nodded, my mouth dry. "I have been very lenient. You need to answer me. Fully please." Her voice had the tone of trying to explain something to a child. I couldn't keep up.

"Yes. I want to show you more." She stood and waited with her eyebrows raised. "I want to show you more of my body if you really want me to."

Slowly my hands went to the zip at the back of my skirt, pulled it down, let my skirt fall and stepped out of it. I sheepishly looked up at her, only for a second. Again her eyebrows were raised. I put my thumbs in the elastic of my knickers. They were new, I had bought them the day before, red silk with a lace edging. I bent my knees and watched them sliding down my stockings. My breasts were swaying with my breathing and movement. I was virtually naked. Naked to all intents and purposes. I stood straight, my arms covering myself as best as I could. I had never been naked with another woman. It was the first time Jane had seen me naked. I didn't really understand why I was. Things had gone so fast. I was nervous, hoped my body was good enough. I could feel sweat at the back of my neck, under my arms.

"Take your arms away. You know I can't see you properly with them there. You are thinking of your embarrassment and not my pleasure. You shouldn't do that, should you?" I shook my head. "Put them behind your back. Your hands always go there or behind your neck and your legs kept apart unless told otherwise, Jennifer."