Manipulated Destiny

Why is Devyn so emotional about this? Joss thought with knitted brows.

Ben suddenly piped in, "Okay everyone there's nothing else to see here. Let's get back to celebrating a birthday." He began ushering people back into the living room. "Come on now, we've got presents to open." He turned back to see Jocie and Hannah standing over the silent couple. "Come on girls, we'll clean this all up in a little bit. Let's give these two some time to sort things out."

Jocie quickly asked her best friend, just to be sure, "Do you need some help?"

The blonde shook her head no, and glancing at Joss one more time, she said, "I'm alright."

Feeling torn between wanting to ask a hundred questions to understand what the hell was happening, even though she already had her suspicions, and at the same time not wanting to sound like a doting mother, Jocie finally took Hannah's hand to walk away. As they exited, Jocie quickly looked back at the two women. It was very clear the intensity in the room could be cut with a knife. "Skyler, if you need anything, let me know," she firmly said, and saw the back of the strawberry blonde head nod silently.

Alone once again, the two women stared at one another for a few moments before Devyn found her voice. "Do you really want me to go away?" she gently inquired.

Skyler choked back another sob. "Never," she answered almost inaudibly. "I just thought....I was dreaming again."

"They told me you were dead," Devyn choked out in a whisper.

Confused emerald green eyes didn't know how to answer. She stared into the pain-filled blue orbs trying to grasp what was just said. "I.....what do you...." Skyler then noticed the large bloody palm as the raven haired woman wiped at her face with the back of the hand. "You're bleeding." Immediately her brain shifted to that of the physician. "We have to get that rinsed off and see if there's any glass embedded."

Blue eyes met green once more in a silence so deep that Skyler struggled to pull away in order to tend to the wound. They carefully stood while trying to assist one another. Devyn worked at rinsing off her hand at the sink while Skyler checked the drawers. "I know she has a thorough first aid kit in here," the shorter woman absently commented. "Ah, here we go."

Devyn tried with all her might to hold back the damn of emotions that threatened to crash around her but it was proving to be a losing battle with her mind racing at top speed with so many questions.

Skyler could sense the internal struggle of the woman next her as she too had so much going through her mind. Standing directly under the light fixture above the sink, she concentrated on removing the two pieces of glass she had found. Grateful that the cuts weren't deep, there was only one she assessed should have a butterfly strip. Gently wiping the area with an iodine pad, she then applied the bandage. Noticing an all too familiar scar near her patient's thumb, she was unable to resist brushing her fingers over it, resulting in her damn of emotion crashing down. Fresh tears spilled down her cheeks, and it wasn't long before strong arms pulled her into an embrace she had missed so much. Face buried against the tall woman's chest, Skyler held on for dear life. Both women allowed one another the vulnerability knowing that they were currently in the safest place they could possibly be ---- within one another's arms. The release of ten years of grief became a whirlwind around them.

Neither of them knew how many minutes had passed until finally Skyler dared to speak. "I don't understand. There are a million questions begging to be answered," she softly commented as she wiped at her face with the back of a sleeve.

"I agree, and I hope there are answers to each one." Devyn leaned back against the counter trying to regain her composure. "Would you go for a walk with me?" she softly asked.

Skyler tucked a lock of strawberry blonde hair behind her ear just like Devyn always remembered it. She thought for a moment, debating on whether to abandon the party or not, but looking at the woman she held so dearly to her heart, there was no doubt she would follow her so she automatically nodded her consent. "We should clean up first in here though. I would hate to leave this for Jocie."

"Okay." They worked together at sweeping the broken glass and wiping up the spilled alcohol with a couple of kitchen towels Devyn found in a drawer. Once done, they quietly slipped out the back door after Skyler left a message on the dry erase board attached to the front of the fridge.

Walking casually down the street, each of them wondered how to start the conversation. The taller woman habitually stuck her large hands in her pocket. "So your name is Skyler now?"

"Yeah."

"It suits you beautifully." She let out a sigh trying to calm herself. "Mine is Devyn."

"Hmm, I really like it. So much better than Delia which had more of a feminine touch anyways. You know that's why I always called you Del." She brushed a small hand through her hair feeling at a loss and full of questions at the same time. "So where have you been living?"

"Chicago."

"Really?! I would not have figured Chicago would be somewhere you'd want to be."

"It's where the Feds sent me. I was so emotionally distraught that I didn't care what happened to me or where I was. I just wanted to die."

Skyler's eyebrows wrinkled in thought. "Why would each of us be told the other was dead?" They stopped and stared at one another before Skyler said, "Maybe we should start from the beginning. Somehow we should be able to put the pieces together.

Devyn nodded in agreement.

The small blonde thought for a moment as the breeze blew. "Would you be opposed to coming over to my place for our conversation?"

"I will follow you anywhere," Devyn whispered sincerely.

Darkened forest green eyes shot the tall brunette a look of surprise and recognition. Amber eyebrows drew together, remembering the last time she heard those words, and it tugged at a painful part of her heart. "Yes," she hesitantly began, "I....remember."

*******************

They sat at the kitchen table sharing a pot of jasmine tea. Each of them was somewhat reluctant to talk in detail about what happened on that fateful day. They were afraid of re-hashing the emotions of the turmoil which both of them had bottled up in different ways. Finally Skyler softly said, "Well, I guess I'll start this and we'll fill in the blanks from there."

"Okay," Devyn whispered in response.

"Two agents had come to our place to take me to a safe house. They explained that they were going to pick you up once the bust had been made at your workplace. I had been assured that you were in safe hands with the other agents undercover in the building and surround area." Skyler ran fingers through her shaggy blonde locks and sighed as her mind traveled to that awful day. "We were almost at this safe house location when we all heard over the CB radio that there was a massive explosion at the pharmaceutical building which resulted in casualties. I was in a complete panic and pleaded with them to find out if you were okay. They got me into the safe house and promised that I would get further news as soon as they returned."

Skyler wiped the tears from her cheeks with the back of a hand. "I waited, six hours I waited for someone to finally come back. Agent Buckland is the one who sat me down and explained that you were caught in the explosion along with one other agent and that neither of you survived." She dabbed at her eyes with her shirt sleeve. "My whole world fell apart Devyn. I was told you were gone and that our townhouse had been set ablaze. Mr. Buckland tried to reassure me how lucky I was to now be in witness protection, that I had to start a new life. I wasn't even given the opportunity to contact my parents or my sister." She choked back the sob that threatened to undo her.

Devyn reached across the table and held the blonde's hands within her own.

"Within a couple of hours, I was shipped here with a portion of money to last me a few months and a small apartment on the west side of town right next to the university. They got me enrolled to finish my schooling and I don't even know how I did it. I was numb. Absolutely numb. I had no one and nothing to live for. I wept daily when I wasn't in class or on rounds. I became clinically depressed, even suicidal at some point because I just couldn't cope with how it all happened." The tears fell freely and heavily now.

Devyn wept for her love and all of the agony each of them had gone through alone.

Sometime before graduating, I met Jocie who was a complete lifesaver for me. Without her emotional and mental support, I surely would have taken my life."

Devyn scooted her chair closer and held the woman she loved until the tears began to calm. "When I woke up in ICU, over a week had passed. Aunt Cathy was there by my bedside. The first thing I needed to know was where you were. She put off telling me for a little while because the drugs they had me on kept knocking me out. After a couple of days I begged her to please explain what the hell was going on. She told me about our home being destroyed in the fire. Just when she was going to continue, Agent Buckland walked into the room. He took a seat and calmly explained how the agents who were supposed to bring you to the safe house got there too late --- how the fire was out of control. He even handed me a newspaper clipping of the incident stating who was injured and who died in the fire. He said he was sorry that they couldn't get to you." Devyn held the smaller woman tighter as she felt Skyler's arms clutch her about the waist.

"I was devastated to say the least. I wreaked havoc with all of the medical staff at the hospital as I proceeded to repeatedly pull out the IVs, unhook myself from the machines --- I was not in my right mind. I just needed to die. They had to literally restrain me to the bed. Aunt Cathy visited me daily and wept. She couldn't get me to talk. After a couple of weeks Buckland returned stating that I would be sent to Chicago to start a new life. That was also the last day I ever saw Aunt Cathy. She kissed me on the cheek and pleaded with tears in her eyes for me to not give up on life. A couple of years later, I received a letter from the FBI that Aunt Cathy passed away."

"Oh Devyn this is so awful," Skyler stated through choking sobs.

"In a similar way of what Jocie did for you is what Hannah has done for me. She was a life saver, and she put up with so much of my hard, cold anger."

"I'm glad they were there for us."

*************

Devyn exited the bathroom after washing her face with cold water. Recounting what each of them had experienced so long ago was emotionally nerve-wracking. She took a deep breath as she returned to the kitchen to find Skyler filling their cups with fresh tea. She noticed how the blonde's hands slightly shook as she held the Asian teapot, and how those beautiful eyes were still red and swollen just like her own. "So are....well are you....involved with anyone?" Devyn hesitantly asked.

Skyler momentarily stared at the dark wood grain of the table. "No," Skyler softly stated. "I've tried dating, but the very few dates I had ended right after the first meeting. I would find myself sitting there listening to the person and in the back of my mind I wanted it to be you. I wanted you to be there and be able to reach out and hold your hand and laugh with you." Skyler explained as she wiped an errant tear from her cheek. "Jocie even tried after expressing great interest in me. She was so patient for six months. In that time it was just....chaste kisses and cuddling but every time I closed my eyes, I would see you and crave to feel you, but it wasn't you so I'd withdraw deeper within myself." She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear. "I realized then that what I truly needed and was comfortable giving ran more along the lines of a close sibling relationship. I am still very grateful that Joss and I could be such good friends --- actually she's my best friend. And now I am happy that she seems to have found someone."

"Yeah, Hannah is sure a character. " Devyn reached across the small kitchen table once again with open palms faced up, hoping her silent request would be accepted.

Skyler looked at the beautiful hands that she adored, and took them within her own. "And are you seeing anyone?" she quietly asked.

"I couldn't, though Hannah was smitten with me for a while. After finally talking about how I was literally incapable of it, we were able to grow as friends. I spent my time closed and cut off from everyone around. I didn't even form friendships with people for the first couple of years. If it wasn't for Hannah's persistence, I'd be a hermit." Devyn glanced at their joined hands, enjoying the warmth and tenderness between them. Taking a deep breath, she blinked back the tears that threatened to spill yet again, and said, "The day I found out I had lost you....my heart died with you.....because it's always been in your care."

Interlacing their fingers with one another, Skyler brought the hands to her lips and kissed them tenderly. She got up, easily coaxing her companion to follow suit. Automatically, they stepped into one another's arms --- arms that they longed for --- arms that were a serene sanctuary for each of them. Suddenly the chime of Skyler's cell phone broke the tranquility. Trying to ignore it, both of them were grateful when it finally stopped, but it wasn't long before it started again. Having to break their contact, the blonde answered it without even looking at the caller ID. "Hello!" she exclaimed in aggravation.

"Hey........umm it's Joss, I just wanted to check on you hun. Everything okay?"

Skyler felt a tinge of guilt for sounding so harsh because she knew her best friend was just looking out for her. She silently let out a slow, steady sigh as she pinched the bridge of her nose between tired eyes. "Sorry. Yes I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be fine?"

"Cause you left the party with a stranger and without a word to anyone except a written note that I found an hour later," Jocie harshly stated.

"Thank you for your concern but I didn't leave with a stranger." She commented as she bit her lip, and gave a sly smile to Devyn. Small fingers tugged on the front of the black buttoned shirt to bring her love closer so she could lean her head against the warm, solid chest.

"Huh? Skyler, hun, we should talk about this. Are you at home?"

"Hey it's all fine. I'll explain it all to you tomorrow. Well technically it's already tomorrow, but you know what I mean. Oh and tell Hannah that Devyn is just fine so she doesn't need to call next. I'll talk with you later, okay?" She pressed the end button without even waiting for a response and then powered off her phone.

Devyn fished in her jeans pocket to silence her own phone before a call could interrupt them again.

Skyler didn't want to leave the loving embrace that surrounded her. Inhaling the familiar scent of the tall woman's body that she had missed so much, she quietly asked, "Do you remember my favorite song?"

With a slight chuckle, Devyn softly said, "Of course."

"Would you sing it for me? Please?" Skyler asked as she snuggled further into Devyn's chest.

"Anything you wish," came the reply as Devyn held her love tighter. Clearing her throat, she softly hummed to make sure she got the correct tune, and then the words gracefully flowed from her lips. They swayed tenderly in one another's arms. When the last lyric spilled from her throat, Devyn realized just how exhausted the shorter blonde was. She felt the grip around her waist begin to slip, and so Devyn thought it would be a good idea for them to hit the sack. She gently led her love upstairs to where she hoped she would locate the bedroom without a problem.

The good doctor was gently led to sit on the bed while her boots were lovingly removed. "Don't leave me," Skyler softly stated with such emotion that it tugged at Devyn's heart. "Not ever again..."

"Never my love. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere but into this bed with you --- and sleep in each other's arms." Without much thought, they assisted each other with the removal of jeans and shirts.

Skyler managed to pull on an oversized T-shirt. When she glanced at Devyn clad in cotton knit boxers and her undershirt, she asked, "Do you want something different to wear?"

"No, I'm fine." They climbed under the covers, and held one another firmly out of fear the other would vanish. Arms and legs wrapped around each other's bodies contentedly as they drifted off peacefully.

**********

The cool autumn breeze softly blew amidst the bright yellow sun above. On the bed, a small figure snuggled closer to the warmth beneath her. She inhaled the long ago familiar fragrance as her mind slowly awakened to happy memories of her lover. "I've missed you so much," she whispered. "Missed being able to do this." Her hands brushed against the soft cotton as arms squeezed around her subject. Amber eyebrows furrowed as something seemed odd, and suddenly her mind jostled further over the realization. Sea green eyes jerked open, looking at the oversized body pillow between her arms. Thoughts rushed through her mind, trying to comprehend the events in the last several hours. "No," she choked forcibly through a clenched jaw. "It was so real. She was right here." She looked around for any spot of evidence. "I spoke with her. It was real...." She burst aloud. "Wasn't it?!?" Hot frantic tears fell down her cheeks, and she felt robbed. The sobs that choked her came out in wave after emotional wave.

The bedroom door was carefully pushed open as Devyn walked in with two steaming mugs of coffee. "Oh shit," Devyn commented with distraught upon witnessing Skyler's distress. "What's going on?" she questioned in exasperation. "What happened?" She set down the mugs quickly on the nightstand as she knelt on the bed. She instinctively wrapped her arms around Skyler as the younger woman buried her face in the crook of Devyn's neck. Long fingers brushed through blonde locks with a love that went beyond time.

Skyler tried to calm her rage and utter fear. As her breathing slowed, she began to say, "I thought....I was dreaming again, but then I wasn't.....and I swear I was wrapped around you." Skyler struggled with the words, her mind remembering the shock and realization of the pillow beneath her instead of her love. "You were gone and I thought....that somehow.....I conjured you up returning to me. Oh it was so awful..." she trailed off.

Devyn mentally kicked herself for having gotten up so quietly, but she just didn't want to wake Skyler when she seemed to sleep so peacefully and beautifully. "I am so sorry that I disappeared like that," she softly stated. "I needed to use the bathroom and I placed our clothes in the wash, and just figured I'd surprise you with coffee."

The love behind those azure blue eyes made Skyler's heart swell. She wiped at her face for the twelfth time. "I'm sorry, I guess I was just being stupid."

"No don't say that." Devyn softly responded as she brought her companion's hand up to place a tender kiss on the palm. Reaching over to the nightstand, she handed Skyler a mug of caffeine, and watched Skyler take a couple of sips.

"Wow you remembered how I like it." Running a small hand through her short locks, she breathed out a sigh.

Devyn grabbed the other mug and sat with one leg outstretched on the bed while the other foot was on the floor as she faced the small blonde, who was now between her legs. "What are we going to do with our lives now?" she abruptly questioned.

Jade green eyes stared into the almost empty mug, contemplating what was said. "Well when is your return flight scheduled for?"