After that, our weekly lunches became more or less regular Friday night dinners. Or sometimes Saturday night dinners, when we spent the afternoon together. Somewhere along there I noticed she didn't ever wear her engagement ring anymore, but she didn't bring it up so I didn't either. Except in my head, where we had long discussions about what it meant.
She loved the beach and I have a buddy with a beach house he rarely uses, so we often spent the day there. Sometimes Jan, usually with Marcia, would be there as well. As often as not, when that happened I had absolutely no chance of following most of the conversation.
Katherine also loved biking but didn't have anyone else to ride with, so we did that regularly as well. Then we'd stop at my place or hers, shower and change then go to dinner and sometimes a movie or a play. Or, rarely, to a nightclub. She still spent part of our time together trying to get me on board, but sometimes it felt like she was just going through the motions. We enjoyed each other's company. At least I think she enjoyed my company. I loved being with her.
* * *
I had just finished teaching the last programing class for the semester at the vocational school where I volunteer 3 days a week when my cell rang. It was Katherine.
"I can't make dinner tomorrow," she said when I answered. "The board meeting had to be rescheduled and I won't get out of here before 8:00, so we're having dinner brought in."
"That's ok," I said. "I remember those days. Saturday maybe? Or there's always next week."
"I was thinking maybe you could come by my place later. After the meeting? I'll pick up something for dessert?"
'Is the Pope a catholic bear that poohs in the woods?' I thought. What I said was, "I'd like that. What time?"
"Around 9:00?" she said.
"See you then," I said.
I knocked on her door at 9:06. That was the longest 6 minutes of my life, but the idiot part of my brain was telling me I shouldn't act too anxious by being early. Or even right on time.
When I knocked, Katherine opened the door almost immediately. I think my jaw dropped. Her hair was loose around her shoulders, and she had used only a touch of makeup, with a pale lip gloss. She was wearing a light green dress cut to show just a hint of cleavage, tucked tight around her small waist then dropping loosely across her slender hips to end about an inch above her knees, displaying her bare, world class legs. An expression I didn't recognize briefly clouded her face, then disappeared so quickly I may have imagined it.
"Close your mouth," she said with a smile as she reached for the flowers I had brought. "This isn't the first time you've seen me in a dress."
"Grandma?" she asked, gesturing at the flowers.
"Yeah."
"I think I would have liked your grandmother," she said. "She raised you right. Would you open a bottle of wine while I put these in water?"
She lifted her face for a quick peck as I passed her. It's something friends do. We've been doing it for a while now.
I stepped behind the wet bar and pulled out a bottle of red wine out of the rack, barely glancing at the label. I grabbed 2 glasses and set them on the bar, then moved around to the front of the bar. That put my back to the kitchen where Katherine was putting the flowers in a vase. It gave me a moment to regain some semblance of self-control while I worked on the cork.
Just as the cork came out with a small pop, Katherine stepped up behind me, slid her hands around my waist and lay her head against my shoulder.
"Can we talk?" she asked. I started to turn, but she squeezed my waist. "No. Stay there. I won't be able to say this if you're looking at me." She paused a moment, her arms tightening around my waist.
"I set this up. I set the board meeting so I'd have a reason to ask you over. I had this plan for what I was going to say and when I was going to say it. Then I open the door you get this look on your face like a kid in the toy store who knows he can't play with the toys, and I don't know why. Now I'm really confused. You've never acted like you want to be more than friends."
Another pause, this one longer. I reached down to cover her hands with mine.
"What about Mark?" I asked.
"I gave his ring back when I realized I didn't want to be with him. I want to be with you. When I'm not with you, it's like an ache," she continued. "Even if I know I'll see you tomorrow or the next day, I miss you. I want to be with you so much it frightens me, but the thought of not being with you frightens me even more. I've never not been in control and now I'm not. And I don't know what to do."
She stopped. I felt her tremble slightly as she took a deep breath then released it.
"I've thought about this a lot," she said. "I want to give us a try. Us. Not business. Not friends. Not you and me. Us. Is that OK? Can we try that?"
"Yes," I said as I turned to face her, my hands sliding easily around her waist. I pulled her tightly against me, meaning to kiss her lightly. Her mouth opened under mine as she slid her hands around my neck. Our kiss deepened. She kissed me hungrily, probing between my lips with her tongue. Eventually the kiss ended and Katherine turned her head to rest it on my shoulder with a contented sigh.
"I've been wanting that for a while," she said.
"So have I," I said, stroking her hair, "but I didn't think you'd ever feel that way. When I noticed you never wore your ring anymore, I didn't want to ask why. I was afraid to. I didn't want to mess up what we had. That half a loaf stuff? It sounds stupid, but it's true.
"That's why you've never acted like you wanted me?" she said. "And I never said anything, either. I'm not sure why. For a couple of supposedly intelligent people, we haven't done very well, have we? We need to . . . work on our communication. I thought you weren't interested in me this way and if I said anything I'd lose you. This week I finally decided I didn't want to be just friends anymore. Even if it meant losing you, and even if you didn't come to work with us either. At least I'd know."
"Speaking of work . . . ," I started, but she shushed me, putting her finger against my lips.
"Not tonight. Tonight I'm Becca, not Katherine. No talk about work." She lifted her mouth to mine for another kiss, then moved out of my arms, grasping my hand. Without another word she led me down the hallway to her bedroom. A small table lamp glowed beside her bed, but otherwise the room was dim.
I kissed her briefly, then, turning her around, I undid the zipper on her dress. Turning her back to face me. I undressed her slowly, following my hands with my mouth as I caressed her body. Kneeling to take her panties off, I buried my face in her sparse pubic hair, inhaling her fragrance. She held my head there for a minute, pressing her pelvis against my face.
When she was nude, I stood and undressed quickly then slid my hand gently over her breast, lightly brushing her erect nipple for a moment, before I cupped her small, firm breast as I kissed it, tracing my tongue in circles around, but not touching, the nipple. Becca arched her back, pressing herself against my mouth as she moaned softly.
"It's been a long time for me," she whispered.
I released her breast then ran my hands through her silky hair as I kissed her. Her mouth opened to mine with a soft sigh. I turned her to lay her on the bed then lay beside her, caressing her while I kissed her breast. She gasped when I took her nipple in my mouth and gently bit it. When my hand stoked across her stomach to her pelvis, she spread her magnificent legs to make room for my hand between them. Instead I stroked down the front of her thigh to below her knee then back up the inside of her leg almost to her vee, then moved to her other leg and did the same thing to it.
I slid down her body to replace my hand with my mouth. I kissed and licked down her leg, then back up the inside of her smooth thigh. She spread her legs wider. As I neared her womanhood, I moved to her other leg and did it again.
As I again approached her vee, I rolled her onto her stomach, spread her legs slightly then slid down, caressed the back of her knee with my lips and tongue for several seconds, then slowly made my way all the way up the back of her leg, then moved to her other knee and slowly worked up that leg. This time, when I reached her magnificent ass, I kissed and lick her for several minutes as I worked my way up her back to her neck, then slowly back down to her tailbone. The whole time I was doing that, Becca rubbed her pelvis against the bed, with several small sighs and moans.
Eventually I turned her onto her back again, and slid my body along hers until I could kiss her mouth, then worked my way down her neck to her breasts. After several minutes, Becca groaned as she grasped my head and guided my mouth to her nipple. I sucked it into my mouth then nipped it gently with my teeth. Becca pulled my head tightly against her.
I let go of her nipple and worked my way down her stomach. Eventually reaching her labia I licked and kissed her while she squirmed under me. I licked nipped at her lips, then spread them and probed with my tongue.
"Yessss," she hissed softly.
Sometime later, when her third orgasm ended with a long sigh of pleasure, she grabbed me by the hair and tugged gently. "Come here," she said. "Please."
I slid along her body until I was pressed against her silky length, lying between her legs. Her mouth found mine as her arms went around me, pressing me even more tightly against her, wrapping her legs around mine.
I slid into her slowly. She gasped slightly as I did.
"Can you wait?" she whispered. "Just a minute?"
I stopped as I kissed her lightly.
"Did I hurt you?" I asked, starting to withdraw. She stopped me by tightening her legs around mine, holding me in place.
"No. No. It's not that," she whispered. "It's wonderful. It's just that you're a little bigger than I'm used to, and it's been a really long time. Give me a minute and I'll be ready."
I lifted my weight off her, bracing myself on my arms, then kissed her deeply.
A few moments later she moved against me, wrapping her arms around me again. Hooking her hands over the tops of my shoulders for leverage, then using her legs, she pulled me deeply into her.
":Love me," she whispered, holding me tightly.
* * *
"Where have you been all my life?" she asked. She put her hand behind my neck then pulled me down for a long, deep kiss.
When the kiss ended, Becca rolled onto her stomach, her head laying on her folded arms, hazel eyes looking at me through the tangle of her hair, a small, satisfied smile on her lips. I rolled onto my side and propped my head on one hand, using my other hand to stroke her from the nape of her neck to her marvelous ass, then back to her neck.
"Can I ask you a question?" she asked
I stopped stroking her.
"Don't stop. Unless you want me to cripple you," she said.
I resumed my stroking.
"I'm not prying," she said. "Ok? You wouldn't tell me names anyway, but where'd you learn how to treat a woman? Most men don't have a clue."
"From Jan."
"Jan? How? She's not bi."
"Who better to ask than a woman?" I replied. "Especially when you can do it without worrying what she's going to think about you?"
"I'm going to have to thank her."
We were quite for several minutes as I continued to stroke Becca's back. I leaned down to kiss her from her tailbone to her neck, then propped my head up on my hand and resumed caressing her with my hand.
"Why me?" I asked.
She lifted her head to look at me.
"You really don't know do you? You have no idea of the effect you have on women," she replied, laying her head back down on her folded arms."
"You're known as an innovator. We need someone like that. I didn't know if we were big enough to interest you but when I heard you left AmTech I decided to give it a shot. Your rep says you are very, very good at what you do, maybe one of the best, but personally you fly under the radar. Not very many people know much about you. The only one I knew was Chet, and he wouldn't say much, so I figured you might be a prima donna, or maybe a recluse, good at what you do but no people skills. When you never called me back, I even considered 'asshole.' I was ready for any of that. What I wasn't ready for was you." She paused a few moments, hazel eyes looking up at me through a tangle of honey-colored hair. It was one of the most erotic sights I've ever seen.
"You treat everyone with respect. Including women. Especially women maybe. That's pretty rare, and you're clueless about the effect it has on us. Lots of women are beautiful. Men want us. That's not conceit, it's a biological fact. But most men don't want us as equals and won't let us play on a level field. You're different. I liked you right off, but it really was just business. I did . . . I do . . . want you to come to work with us. I'm not sure exactly when it changed, but later it was for me. After a while recruiting you was just an excuse to see you. I just didn't know it for a while."
I continued to stroke her, saying nothing.
"It's your fault that it's been so long for me," she said after a while.
"My fault? You can have anyone you want," I said, still stroking her from the nape of her neck to the base of her tailbone, then back up to her neck. She shivered with pleasure.
"Ummm. Maybe. I didn't think so until tonight."
She paused a while, maybe thinking about what she wanted to say.
"I sort of broke up with Mark about . . .oh . . . maybe 4 months after I met you. We decided to go on for a while, to see if it was just a phase. You know - me being moody or something - but after a while I realized it would never work with us - Mark and me, I mean. It was mostly mutual. He's a good guy, and we still get together for lunch once in a while, but he's old school. He didn't want a . . . partner? He wants a wife. Not a trophy wife, exactly, but not an equal either. He would have asked me to leave the company. He knows he's that way but doesn't want to change. After I got to know you, I realized I was . . . what's the word I want? I was dissatisfied with him. I just didn't know it was because of you at first. I like the way you treat people. I like the way you treat me. Not just as a woman. As a person. An equal. After I met you, when I'd see Mark it seemed like a step backward but I didn't think you wanted me for me, that you just wanted to be friends. So I thought the one I wanted didn't want me, and I haven't been with anyone."
She paused again, looking up at me.
"Well," she said, "maybe that last part was partly my fault because I never said anything."
"I have no idea what I should say now," I said.
"I know," Becca replied, turning over onto her back and reaching up to put her hand behind my neck. "I guess that's part of my point. You don't take me for granted. But you're not threatened by my success either." She pulled me down and we shared another long, sweet kiss.
"So," she said when the kiss ended, "you're ok with us?"
"I'm ok with us."
"Then I've got some catching up to do," she said, grinning at me. "Since that's partly your fault, maybe you could help me out with that."
* * *
The next morning it was almost 7:30 when I woke, late for me. Becca's side of the bed was empty. I wandered into the kitchen and found a note propped up against a cup, near the coffee pot that was almost full of hot coffee. My kind of woman.
I had to leave early. I have meetings all morning then errands in the afternoon. How about dinner at Robert's? Around 7:30? Call me. Becca.
Dinner that evening was different. I was with Becca, not Katherine. Gone was the tension neither of us had been aware of. We chatted easily over dinner, ended up talking about how companies always have problems designing practical user interfaces for new programs, then drifted into war stories about similar problems we'd both encountered in the past.
"You love the work. Why'd you leave AmTech?" Becca asked.
Not since our first meeting had that question come up. I looked into her eyes, but it was either a guileless, natural segue in the conversation or she was frighteningly good at hiding what she was thinking. Which I knew she was.
"One bottle of wine and I'm supposed to spill my deepest secrets?" I asked, not as casually as I wanted. She caught the undercurrent in my voice. Her eyes narrowed slightly.
There was an edge in her voice as well when she said, "Maybe you could let your guard down a little? Maybe we haven't known each other all that long, but we've spent a lot of time together, and done a lot of talking and . . . other things. If you don't have some idea about me by now, what I think and want, about who I am, you were right the day we met and I've been wasting my time. And yours."
"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm not trying to be difficult. That's almost a reflex. I just don't see any point in picking at it. They lost and I won — more than I ever could have ever known at the time. If I hadn't left AmTech, I'd probably never have met you." I watched her relax. Slightly.
"And you haven't been wasting my time," I continued. "I lo . . . uh . . . care for you. A lot. I like being with you. I enjoy every minute we're together." If she noticed my slip, she let it slide.
"You're smart, well read, knowledgeable on a wide range of subjects, up on current events, good at what you do, and easy to talk with. You have a fine mind. And," I continued with a small grin, "the rest of you is pretty good, too."
"Idiot," she said, grinning back at me as she swatted me with her napkin.
"Here it is," I said. "I was fired. The why doesn't matter. It was a mistake. They eventually realized they screwed up, but by then I didn't care anymore. I wasn't interested in going back after it got straightened out. Partly I was being a stubborn ass because my pride got stepped on, but none of it was my fault - except the stubborn ass part - and it cost AmTech a ton of money. Enough that I don't have to work for a long time if I don't want to. And I won't talk about AmTech. Remember the stubborn ass part? OK?"
Becca cocked her head and gave me one of her half smiles. I melted.
"Okay," she said. "And I didn't mean to push. Honest. I wasn't prying. I didn't even know I was going to say that. It just popped out. It doesn't matter anyway, except the not needing to work. That makes persuading you harder."
"No it doesn't," I said. "I can start Monday."
I've never seen her lose her composure. Like everything else, she did it elegantly. Except for the part where she dropped her fork.
Blushing slightly, she picked it up from her plate, paused, then set it back down and patted her mouth with her napkin, watching me closely, a shadow clouding her face.
"When did you decide?" she asked.
"Last night."
The shadow deepened as she shifted her gaze, looking down at her plate.
"Last night," she repeated softly. Almost a whisper. "After we . . . .?" She left the question unasked.
I reached for her hand. She didn't pull away, but her hand was limp in mine. With the fingertips of my other hand I lifted her chin until she was looking at me again.
"No. Before," I said. "Before I even got to your place. I'd decided I was willing to settle for half a loaf."
The shadow disappeared and she gave me one of her dazzling smiles, almost stopping my heart again. I'd better get a pacemaker.
Becca wasn't much for public displays of affection, but she turned my hand over and kissed my knuckle, then let my hand go.
"Why'd you wait until now to tell me?" she asked.
"There didn't seem to be any urgency when I got there last night," I replied. "When I started to, you shushed me. Then there wasn't a lot of time."
Share the love
English
