Mission Impossible

I was the last to enter the briefing room and stumbled upon Lamed's gaze. She is our coordinator, usually this woman is so optimistic and ever-ironic, but this time she was dead serious. I could read tension in her eyes. Yod had such an uneasy face expression. Samekh just looked grim like a cloud bearing thunderstorm, though that was nothing new - she just has a bitch face. Agent Vav concentrated at some invisible point at the opposite wall and thought.

"Take a seat, Dalet. We haven't got much time" - said Lamed strictly.

Yeah, you got it right. Our callsigns are Hebrew letters. Latin and Greek ones are so much a cliche overused by Hollywood. Cyrillic option was promptly refused, when none of us agreed to be called agent Scsh. Hebrew is just great. Also you can joke about Zionist Occupation Government, masons and Illuminati, so when someone would start talking about top-secret jews right under the government's nose, he'll go straight into the asylum or at least told to wear a tinfoil cap.

"After Kaf got compromised at Taiwan, we suspected, that there is a rat within our ranks. We started to shadow and collect information about everyone, who had access to the files, and methodically narrowed the circle. This way we found, that Wittenberg requested sensitive documents about our ops abroad during the last five years to date. And tomorrow, at 1 pm, he's going to make a presentation for the Congress. That son of a bitch is paranoid as hell, yet he made a mistake. We collected enough information and are absolutely sure - he's about to present them all of our little dirty secrets. You all know too well, that under certain circumstances our operatives have to resort to extreme measures. When lives are at stake, fuck rules and bureaucracy." - said Lamed.

"And you always covered our asses." - added Yod. Lamed just nodded - "Now Agency needs you to cover itself."

"But if we kill him now ..." - said Vav.

"We'll screw things completely." - Lamed finished it for him. - "His death means we just put a signature under his ravings."

"So what? Can we apply some pressure at him? I'm sure we have enough compromising shit on Wittenberg." - proposed Samekh.

"We have compromising materials indeed, but the CIA has it too, and that is a problem. They are practically holding Konrad's balls." - answered Lamed - "The only option we have is to make a swap. We had some luck for a change: Wittenberg backed himself up recently. Of course, he didn't announce it, but our tech guys were after him by that time, so we obtained a key easily. Now we have a clone of Konrad, our psychos take care of him" (comments by Dalet: Psychos, are the department of psychological methods. Terrifyingly capable guys, I must admit.)

Samekh said: "This is a gamechanger! But how do we swap them? It is still a very complex operation and we only have a few hours at best to pull it off. Do we even know where Konrad is now?"

"At the Alistair. He and his guards are occupying the western wing of the seventh floor. Guys are from the 35th guardian regiment." - informed Lamed

"All of them are pneumatics, aren't they?" - Yod asked.

"Sure. We did make them, you know." - Lamed confirmed grimly.

Civilians often think, that pneumatic people, or for short - pneumatics, are some kind of harmless balloon-folk. Retrogrades are still hiring bodyguards of flesh and bones. But that doesn't make any sense! Protein bodies often want to sleep, smoke, eat and then go to the bathroom. But what is even worse, they want to live so much! An Inflatable soldier knows, that if he dies while defending his objective, his yesterday's copy will be incarnated and promoted. Not exactly like Valhalla, but also motivating. On the other hand, he also knows that if he survives at the cost of failing his mission, his game is officially over and he can expect no mercy. Of course, pneumatics suck at martial arts and are useless in hand-to-hand combat without a gun or at least a knife, but that's nothing significant. By the way, there is one more important detail. You can kill a protein dude with a silenced shot, for example. It is much harder to get rid of an inflatable guy without causing much noise. He either bursts deafeningly, or will slowly deflate with enough time to raise an alarm and warn others.

"So, forcing our way in is not an option. We have to take him out without much fuss, but the Alistair is a freaking fortress. Bulletproof glass, steel doors, surveillance and grates in the vents." - stated Samekh.

"Just don't panic. So we enter deflated, we exit the same way. We just need an inside guy in their staff." - proposed Vav.

"I wish we had a week, we could hook a maid, janitor or a plumber. But we don't have this time." - cut off Lamed. - "Go on, brainstorm, I need crazy ideas. All the normal ones are already considered and rejected."

We exchanged worried looks.

"What if we kidnap him on his way to the Congress? Let's swap his car. Just put the clone in the new one." - I proposed.

"We don't know which car he'll be in. It is highly likely, that tomorrow, Senator Kingsley is going there to pick him up personally, or it will be some CIA guy. And of course they will be still guarded on their way." - said Lamed

"Then let's make a false fire alarm. Lure him out." - proposed Vav.

"Wittenberg is a scumbag, but he's smart enough. He knows, that we know, that he knows and that's exactly why he locked himself in that safe. However, if you know any good reason that would make him come out - please tell." - said Lamed.

"What kind of material do they have on Konrad? Can we take him off the hook?" - Yod tried another direction.

Lamed frowned: "Konrad used to be into kids. And got caught."

"How then we take of the hook our clone? They are going to expose their materials if he backs down." - asked I.

"That's a less urgent problem. We shall rehabilitate him somehow, after all that was before he transitioned himself to pneumatic, now he's different and not dangerous. Of course, it is still a shame, but he isn't going to jail. As for public humiliation and tainted reputation - he deserves them completely."

"So. What weak spots does he have?" - I asked.

"He's a chauvinist pig and womanizer."

"Does he call girl often?"

"Used to, but not now. If he calls any, we'd know instantly. Wittenberg is hiding and leading a righteous life for two weeks." - said Lamed.

"Okay, he didn't call any girls, but his guards may not know that. They should be used to these fairies going back and forth to his room." - I exclaimed - "Not that I wish to play a prostitute."

Yod snorted dismissively, yet Lamed was interested - "That's better than nothing."

"By the way, you said he's a chauvinist. What exactly does it means in case of Wittenberg?" - asked Vav.

"He's a homophobe, misogynist and racist. Jerks starter package in other words." - said Lamed.

"That's good!" - Samekh lightened up - "Well, of course, it is bad, but it is good for us. I have a really crazy idea now. So his guards are hetero males only, am I right? Because he can cherry pick them according to their dossiers." - she went on.

"Probably so, but we must check it." - Lamed was intrigued - "Do you intend to seduce his toy soldiers to get inside? They won't let you in without direct order."

"No, I don't plan to ask them politely. They are mere infantry, lowest element of food chain, they haven't been with a woman for all their sorry life. So they are extremely hungry..." - Samekh explained.

"How does it help our cause?" - Lamed shrugged skeptically - "Do you want to be gang raped by them?"

"Why? She may have a point, at least I got. Samekh implies that these brave warriors are going to kinda self-destruct in presence of charming ladies." - by the end of this tirade I giggled like a schoolgirl, telling a smutty joke.

Samekh continued: "A funny situation happened to me and my James recently. He's a good and fair fellow. He never does naughty things, when I have to leave him and go to business trips. So he waits for me. Once, after the mission at Zagreb I invited him to my place, dressed hot for him and overdid it. When he opened the door and saw me, he deflated right there on the threshold, holding flowers in his hand. Just two weeks of male chastity and such a spectacular result."

We all looked at Vav, the only guy in the briefing room, waiting for his comments.

"Yes. Sometimes it happens." - he confirmed briefly.

I thought then: "Is he really so shy about it? He is an adult man, professional, he has been to so many dangerous affairs. And now he's like a teenage boy caught with his hand under blanket. That's funny."

"How often. Is there a chance to weaponize this, as Samekh implies? This idea is so weird, but that's best one we have so far. We have to grasp at straw. If you think that's not reliable and guards will not fall for that trick, say it now." - said Lamed.

Vav thought for half a minute, than said: "Yes, this can work. If they haven't been laid for a long time, are relaxed and feel no imminent threat - they'll have no chance to resist."

"Too many ifs" - grumbled Lamed - "I wait better ideas. Anyone has something else to say?"

None of us had.

"Then so be it. We take Samekh's idea. She's author and thus I appoint her as a volunteer for this mission. Yod, Dalet, you can pass. For obvious reasons Vav is not going with you beyond the parking lot."

"I'm game."

"What about you, Yod?"

"Did I ever chicken out? Of course I go to." - said she.

"Marvelous. Then we need a few guy from tech team. To do some checking of the dossiers of the biological prototypes of the Wittenbers guards. Also we need some lab rats to test your weapons on. Sexual bombs testing site." - Lamed chuckled - "As for you, girls, scoot to the minus third floor and pick yourself some equipment. Just don't spend too much time in front of a mirror. I give you thirty minutes for your image-changing. Vav, please stay here. I guess your intimate life is okay, am I right? So their charms shouldn't affect you, that's good, because we need a control group for our experiment."

Samekh, Yod and I went to the lifts. Girls at the store room started to disguise us with all the possible enthusiasm, I bet this task was so much different from their usual day to day routines.

Of all our trio only I really look like a girl of semitic origin. I have curly shoulder long raven hair, brown eyes, somewhat longish nose, but guys usually overlook this minor flaw, because I have D cup when inflated to the bare minimum volume. Nowadays inflatable girls, like myself, hardly can impress someone with just curves, however it's not that easy to pump a petite girl into curvy bombshell. Of course breast and butt would grow a bit due to over-pumping, but if you are too persistent, you are going to just ruin your figure and blow up like a round ball. Also, such tricks are very detriment to our skin.

Credits for my image renewal goes to Beatrice and Sheila. They went for brute-force efficiency rather then some more subtle and creative approach and just inflated me first, using my natural advantages to the fullest. For my extreme curves they found white tangas, bra and stockings, and upon that sunny yellow skirt and blouse. Skirt was pretty short - above the knee, it hugged my rear tightly, but was more loose downwards. Blouse had buttons, and I didn't even try to button up two upmost - not a chance. My tummy was exposed, allowing my airplug to be visible in the most provocative way. I looked outright silly bimbo and would never go outdoors wearing such an outfit, but for the success of our mission that could actually be perfect. Looking stupid is a perfect antipode of looking dangerous. As Vav said, this works better, when target is relaxed and his sense of vigilance is deafened.

Yod and Samekh got great restyling too. All three turned out to be completely different, covering various tastes and sorts of wild dreams men have about women.

Yod is swarthy latina girl, she was inflated too, but not as much as me. Her ass clad in stretch sport pants was a thing. Sketchers and a tight t-shirt completed her image.

As to Samekh, she is a tall slender blonde, not busty at all, but her size fits her well. She had on a pair of high boots and a mini vest upon a latex top. Of course this depends on tastes, yet for some men this is a killer combo.

"Now what? Time to go, our thirty minutes are up." - said Samekh.

"Did you put that things, when your James deflated from just your sight?" - I asked her, on the way to the lifts.

She nodded.

"So that's what kind of relationships you have..." - I grinned.

"Do you have something against that kind of relationships?" - she asked somewhat defensively.

"Nothing at all, I'm just curious."

Samekh didn't answer, but a faint smile appeared on the tips of her lips.

From the lift doors, to the left, down the corridor and through the open space were went back to the briefing room, clicking the floor with our high heels. People around us forgot their work and stared. In the sudden silence we almost could hear the sounds of dropping jaws.

Vav whistled, when we entered and sat at our seats. Three tech guys that were left hand from Lamed gazed at us gaping their mouths open. I knew two of them, Steve and Greg, they are brothers, they are blond and both are kind of cute, but too shy and reserved. When I caught Gregs sight, staring at my bust, he hastily switched back to his notebook. Steve casted glances at Samekh, Yod was targeted by the third one that was a bulky red headed dude wearing crumpled plaid shirt. So the game was distributed among hunters.

"Gentlemen, tell our agents about your findings." - ordered Lamed.

Steve turned his laptop so we could see the screen and typed some commands into console. Black screen was immediately filled with rows of numbers and names.

"Wittenberg doesn't report us, which guys he picked. But we can have a very good guess based on the list of those, who's backups he updated recently." - Explained Steve.

"Go on." - Samekh cheered him up with her charming contralto, making tech guy blossom with a smile.

"So ..." - he redirected output of the previous command and made a query, - "Here are the dossiers of these dudes. Well, more precisely their flesh and bone prototypes."

A large table appeared on the screen.

"Now show two columns: their names and sexual orientation" - two last words she stretched as if rolling the vowels at the tip of her tongue as menthol candies.

"May ask a question, agent." - exhaled Steve, doing his best keeping his eyes at the laptop.

"Yes, you may."

"Why are we digging under director Wittenberg and why we need information about, well, their bedroom preferences?"

"And this, lieutenant," - Samekh leaned forward, so her face got right next to Steve - "is a secret information."

Samekh pressed her index finger against her sensual lips and said: "Shhhh"

Steve backed from her, leaning against the back of his chair and inhaled. Then I heard another "shhhh". But this time hissing went from Steve and it was way louder. There was a blissful smile on his lips, at first he didn't even realize what's happening.

It was so unexpectedly easy. I expected more effort on our side, like performing a strip-tease show for the nerds, but Samekh made it with just words, body language and some basic flirting. After this impressive demonstration of charms she scored a first point. 1:0:0. Now we had to catch up his her.

"Oh, my apologies." - Steve woke up to the reality, was deeply embarrassed and would have blushed if he still could, inflatable bodies just don't do it.

He already started sliding down on the seat, sliding over the back of his chair.

"No problems, Steve, everything is normal. Just relax." - Samekh calmed him somewhat, though she couldn't help smiling victoriously.

Two remaining nerds watched at their deflating friend with astonishment. We had to act quickly before boys get really afraid and defensive.

Yod got up and approached that red bulky guy, pushed Steves laptop to him and landed her gorgeous ass clad in tight pants onto the glass table. - "Dave, now show me the results. Steve haven't time to finish his report." - Yod was also quite good at speaking seductively, though her voice wasn't as deep and lacked imperative notes that Samekh has.

Though, I had my own goal, so I concentrated on Greg. I approached him swaying my inflated hips and stood nearby, treading on the arms of the chair, where his brother still was deflating.

"Hi." - I added a sweet smile to the simple greating, - "You two are brothers, aren't you? Can you tell me, does he have a girlfriend?"

"No. He doesn't. He sort of avoids women." - said Greg.

"But why? We are good." - I asked, still smiling and playing with my black locs. He was already very confused and didn't even try to maintain eye contact, openly staring into my cleavage, which was right in front of his face.

"You are very beautiful... Out of my and my brothers league for sure."

"Why do you think so? Do you mean that you are single too, like your brother? Can I ask you a personal question then?

He nodded.

I lean to his ear closing the distance even more and whispered: "When was the last time you had sex?"

"Lo-Long ago"

"No worries, I won't tell anyone." - I winked.

"Two months ago."

"That's strange, because you are cute."

Finally there was a familiar hissing sound and I felt a jet of his leaking air gently caressing my tummy.

"Ouch, I couldn't resist it too, sorry." - apologized Greg.

"No worries, you did nothing bad" - I stroke his hair in the most tender way.

Red dude also started to deflate, judging by yet another hissing sound. So S bomb testing passed successfully, all three objectives met, and thus I could open my cards to him.

"Greg, actually you held valiantly against my charms, because I played so straightforward and dirty... I should apologize, but we really had to test it on someone unwitting, that's important for our mission.

"I don't mind." - Greg smiled blissfully, as his body slowly sagged in the chair next to me. - "I really liked that. But wait, do you really plan to trick Wittenberg's guards the same way? And that's why you checked to make sure they are into girls ..."

"I like that you like it. You are smart boy, Greg. Yes, that's our idea."

"Ouch. So now I know top secret information?" - he did his best to chuckle, which wasn't so easy, when his face started to sink down into collar of his shirt.

"Indeed. You know too much now." - I grinned - "But you ain't going to tell anyone, soon you'll de deflated."

For a few seconds he was genuinely afraid: "S-Seriously?

"We shall inflate you, when our mission is over. Hm, how about I personally look after that?" - I cooed.

"That would be wonderful!"

"Of course it will be. Now stay here boy and don't walk away" - I gave his nose a poke, - "I have yet another issue to solve."

I left Greg to finish his deflation and turned my attention to Samekh, who just sat next to Vav. We didn't plan that initially, but she clearly intended to win our informal competition scoring 2:1:1. Okay, challenge accepted.

I went towards them passing by Lamed. Miss Coordinator watched all this mess silently and didn't intervene to stop us.

"I really don't understand, what am I doing here? I'm not going on this mission, your magic doesn't work on me, as you see. Should I just sit here and watch you deflating these pups?" - Vav said.

"Why are you so sure, it doesn't work on you?" - teased Samekh.

Vav looked calm and confident indeed. He has short dark hair, straight nose, he looked cool and unstirred, yet his lips were pursed - a good sign of suppressed emotions. So, where Samekh failed, maybe I should win.