Mizspelred Tie Toe

Reggy heard the words and although he was perfectly capable of understanding each word, somehow the overall meaning of the sentence was beyond his grasp.

"Wait." he said in disbelief. "This is a joke, right?"

Even as he was inquiring as to the seriousness of what he'd been told, his mind was starting to put together the sequence of events. He'd never met his father or any of this grandparents. For most of his childhood it was just his mom, Lori, busting her ass to take care of Reggy and his sister Sue. Social services had wanted his mother to name their father when they'd each been born and because she wouldn't she was ineligible for any government assistance. This also made his mother unemployable by most companies offering steady work because of how the health care law worked. So she went from project to project, often with either dead time or overlap. She made a little money here, and then there, but it was never enough and it was always a one time payment.

Reggy was ten when his mother finally started an enterprise that would actually stay in business and suddenly their family went from always barely getting by to being rather well off. It was after the money came in that Reggy met his uncle Clark. He decided to move his family near his sister so he could help his sister out once she no longer needed any help of course. As Reggy became a teenager he saw right through his uncle and at times tried to warn his mother but she let him know that she knew perfectly well what was really going on. She had told Reggy that she would tolerate it because family is family. They all had to stick together and she was willing to let her brother take advantage of her so long as he was in her life.

So as teenagers, Reggy, his sister Sue, and their cousin Laura all spent a lot of time together. Reggy was the oldest, with Sue and Laura both being almost the same age. When Reggy's uncle first moved to town, there were a lot of times when it seemed the girls had their own secret world with each other and Reggy was the odd man out. However, as they all got older, it was Reggy and Laura who became the closest of friends while Sue often spent most of her time with other friends or her constant on and off boyfriend.

Reggy was very happy to hear that Laura had been admitted to the same university that he attended. Sue was planning on going to a school in the north east so she wouldn't be around as often as Reggy once she started college life.

It was once said that a utopia would be so boring that no one living in it would ever write a thing. For Reggy, that was a lot like what his life sounded like. Sure, money can't buy happiness but it can sure buy a lot of solutions to common problems so you don't have to deal with them. And it wasn't like their family was super rich by any means but they were comfortable.

So being used to that kind of environment, it was very odd when Reggy heard his uncle and his mother arguing over something. They each clamped up the moment Reggy came into the room but from what he could tell his mother wanted to do something and Uncle Clark was against it.

Later that week, in the middle of a summer barbecue behind the house, the argument exploded again and Uncle Clark loudly declared that he was leaving, demanded his wife and daughter leave with him and in the future there would be no more contact between Laura and Reggy.

Everyone was just looking at him and thinking that perhaps he had drunk too much. Laura immediately challenged her father by stating she was over 18 and thus could stay if she wanted. That lasted for all of about thirty seconds until the girl bent to her father's will. They all left and Reggy was confused at what the hell had just happened.

Reggy's mother dodged questions about the incident and when Reggy texted Laura, even at home she still didn't know anything and told Reggy she wasn't allowed to talk to him anymore. This was getting too weird.

Once all the guests had left, the catering staff had finished cleaning up, and the house was mostly back to normal, Reggy and Sue went to their mother to demand an answer.

The answer she offered them was to give them each a glass of wine. Reggy and Sue looked at each other, not sure if they should drink or not. They were both over 18 but neither was 21 yet so that was weird.

"Oh, you can have a drink if I give it to you." their mother said. Reggy wasn't sure if Sue was drinking hers of not but he only pretended to take a sip and then he put it down. He'd been given a beer at a party by some frat boys who were trying to recruit him for their fraternity. Reggy had not liked the taste of alcohol and he didn't think his mind would change on that just because it was his mother who was giving it to him now.

"There. Let it make you feel warm." their mother said.

"You're honestly not trying to tell us you and Uncle Clark were arguing over the drinking age." Sue said.

"No, of course not. I just thought you both might need a little something to help you handle the truth."

"What truth?" Reggy asked.

"Now, this is sort of a secret so don't go repeating any of this."

"Any of what?" Sue asked.

"I mean it when I say secret. If any of this got out any more than it already is we'd be ruined."

"Then maybe I don't want to know." Sue responded.

"That's your choice. Reggy? How about you?"

"I don't want to be nosy or anything but I would like to know what's going on if this is going to affect my life."

"It might at that." his mother said.

There was a moment when Reggy and his mother waited for Sue to leave if she actually felt like leaving but then Sue gestured to let them know that she wasn't going anywhere.

"Ok. So the big thing is this. My father got me pregnant and Reggy, that's how you came into the world."

There was silence. The ticks of the clock seemed to echo through the room.

"Wait." Reggy said in disbelief. "This is a joke, right?"

His mother grimaced. "No. Not a joke. Nothing even close to a joke."

Sue started to realize what this could possibly mean and she started to look back and forth between mother and son. "Holy shit."

"So, like, he was your step dad? Someone your mom was just married to or something?"

"No, honey. He was my father just as he is your father."

Reggy felt his bones turn to gelatin and he almost started to gag. "No."

"So, mom," added Sue, "That means you're like ... our sister. What?"

"His half sister."

Reggy felt dizzy. The world was spinning around him.

"Baby, are you ok?" his mother asked.

"Ok? Ok? You dare ask me if I'm ok."

"I just thought you were old enough now to ..."

"What the hell? Are you fucking kidding me? And Uncle Clark knows?"

"No. He doesn't know about you."

"Then what the hell was all that crap you were arguing about?"

"It was about Sue."

"What about me?" Sue asked.

"Well, let's just say that your cousin Laura is also your sister."

Reggy started to sneer at his mother. "That is so fucked up on so many levels."

"You're telling me Uncle Clark is my dad?" Sue asked when she could finally get words out. "He never even talks to me."

"Yes. He didn't want me to tell you but you're old enough now. You need to know."

"Is this why I have to use an inhaler?" Reggy accused.

"What? No. That's just ..."

"And Sue has to wear glasses."

"A lot of people wear glasses., son."

"What the hell were you thinking? You just ... What? ... spread your legs for everyone in the family? Huh? You didn't care that it could cause like, birth defects or ..."

"Reg, you've been checked. Sue has been checked. You're both ..."

"I'm a mutant." Reggy said.

"That's ridiculous."

"Reg, mom's right. If ..."

"You're taking her side!"

"There's no side, Reg."

"How the hell do you have sex with your own father?"

"You just do because ... he's amazing."

"Yeah, so amazing that I've never even met the asshole."

"Well, he was against having any more children and then when my mom found out what we were doing ..."

"I don't care! I really, REALLY, don't fucking give a damn. Fucking Hell mom! This is fucked. This is so fucking beyond ... you know ... something."

Reggy stormed out and wouldn't listen to anything his mother was saying. He locked himself into his room and very loudly told them all to go away.

"You can judge me all you want but you weren't there. You don't understand."

"Leave me alone!"

Sue went up to her mother and put her hand on her shoulder. "Maybe he needs some time."

"Well, he better get over his hang ups because feeling bad about it isn't going to change anything."

"I have some questions though. Is that ok?"

"Ask anything you want?" Lori responded as they walked back to the sitting room.

"Did they ... make you?"

"What? No."

"They didn't like, force you or anything?"

"No. Absolutely not. My father was the strongest man to ever live but he never forced me to do anything. I loved him and I thought he needed me."

"But mom, you're talking about your own father. I mean, how did that even happen?"

"He was so great. And my mother, you know, she couldn't keep up with him. I know they say that a man starts to lose his sexual appetite when he gets older but not your grandfather. He wanted it more and more often and my mother either wouldn't or couldn't give it to him. They got into arguments about it all the time. And then my mom caught my dad talking to some younger woman. Of course my father said that they were just talking and" laughing, "he even brought up freedom of speech and all that. Oh, but my mother was furious and what little sex my father was getting before; he was getting practically none after that."

"Mom. That's ... that's all about him. How did you decide to ... sleep with ... you know?"

"It wasn't a difficult thing to do. He was so tall, and muscular. I'm getting goosebumps just remembering. I mean, I could tell you that it was all about my mother not meeting his needs anymore or that I wanted to keep my parents from getting divorce but really, none of that is true. I mean, it is true but really, deep down, I wanted him. I mean, why would I ever want to date or have sex with any of the little sissies who went to high school with me when I had a real man at home."

"Ok, I guess. But then what about me?"

"You mean your uncle Clark?"

"Um ... yeah."

"Oh, I don't know. I mean, after I got pregnant there was a lot of yelling but my brother didn't know about any of it. My mom wanted me to get an abortion but ... well, how could I? I'm not going to kill my baby. What mother does that? That was when any love I had for my father died. Even if there were birth defects, and thank God that there weren't, but even if there had been, I'd want you two alive and I'd never let anyone hurt you."

"Yeah, but mom, how do you go from sleeping with your father to ... your brother?"

"Well, after that I was alone. My parents wouldn't help me at all but you know that. Clark thought that was really unfair so he said I could come live with him."

"Because he didn't know."

"It was a secret."

"Ok but then who's idea was it to ..."

"It was mine."

"But didn't you ever think, you know, 'hey this is incest and maybe I shouldn't be doing this.' Did it ever cross your mind?"

"No. I mean, sure as a thought it was there but not as an emotion. Once I eased Clark into it ..."

"What do you mean, ease him into it?"

"Well, he wasn't really all on board at first. He was dating Becky and they were talking about getting married but then they broke up."

"Becky?"

"Just some girl. And so I sort of dropped the idea in his head that he could marry me. He'd been there for me and I wanted to be there for him. It was just an innocent kiss at first but then he was confused for a few days and so I gave him a blow job one morning to help him understand what I was really talking about."

"Ew, could you leave out the specific sex details?"

"Well, he understood after that but it took a few more days before he'd let me do that again and it was a week before he was comfortable enough to do things to me. But then once he started he went from sucking my nipples to fucking me lightning fast. I think what finally convinced him was when I said that he couldn't get me pregnant so it didn't matter if we had sex or not."

"Wait. Why couldn't you get pregnant?"

"I was already pregnant ... with Reggy."

"You were still pregnant!"

"Yeah. Clark and I, we sort of worked it out between us that he was going to be Reggy's dad and we were going to be together as a couple and we were talking like that for a few months."

"Weird. So what happened?"

"He started dating Stacy again. He'd dated her before but left her when he found out she was married already. She came and told him her divorce was final and they got back together."

"She was married before?"

"Yeah. She got her hooks into him and he started going on this religious thing and not long after Reggy was born we were out of the house."

"He couldn't just stop and let you stay there?"

"He tried that at first but by then we'd been sexual with each other so much that just having me near meant we were going to have sex. But then he proposed to Stacy and my parents got involved with planning the wedding and it was everyone against just me so I had to leave. I wasn't even invited to the wedding. In fact they sort of threatened to have me arrested if I even showed up."

"That's awful."

"But I did see Clark about a week after the honeymoon. He came to where I was staying to make sure that I wasn't homeless or anything. And that's when it happened. That was our last time together and that's when you were conceived. I kept you a secret from all of them at first because I didn't want to have to hear them ask me to kill my baby again. I never gave Clark that chance to ruin how I felt for him. Because they asked me to kill Reggy I'll never forgive my parents. I'll never help them. I'll never go see them. Clark is different. He never asked me to do that."

"Ok, that's enough. I understand now."

"I'm glad. So you understand why I was willing to let your uncle back into our lives."

"He's my father. That's weird. But ... you haven't been ... sleeping with him recently, have you?"

"Oh. No, honey. He's not the man he once was and I don't feel that way about him anymore. That's not to say rekindling would be impossible but no, nothing like that has been going on."

"So, what are we going to do?"

"Nothing. You don't have to do anything."

"Um ... Uncle Clark ... is pretty mad."

"He'll get over it or he won't. If not then he can leave just like back then. I don't need his help."

"What if he tells?"

"And damage his relationship with his wife by admitting he cheated on her after being married only a couple of weeks? With his sister no less? And had a child of that? No. He's going to keep his mouth shut the same as he's always done."

"But what if?"

"If he tells anyone, it'll be his wife first. Luckily for us, I happen to know about a certain something to keep her in check as well so even if your uncle can't keep quiet on his own accord, I can press Stacy to persuade him."

"And what about Reggy?"

"We'll give him some time tonight. Maybe he'll need the weekend but he'll eventually calm down."

"And what if he doesn't?"

"Then he knows where the door is. No one is making him stay."

The house was very quiet after that. Lori sat drinking wine in her very large living room with her very expensive furniture. Sue was sitting in the dining room but the walls were such that she could see through to the living room and the kitchen with just a turn of her head.

Sue opened up her laptop and started to look through all the family photos that were stored in the cloud. There were all kinds of pictures of things but what Sue was mostly interested in was Uncle Clark. The idea that he was her father, her real father, was just so strange. He usually never had more than two words for her at a time. It wasn't that he was unfriendly to her but there just never seemed to be a time when he ever had a real conversation with her.

As she looked through the pictures a very weird pattern started to emerge. He was never standing next to her. In the very few pictures that featured her and her uncle, there were usually several people between them. That brought to memory the kinds of gifts he would give her for her birthday or for Christmas. They were always generic greeting cards that he couldn't even be bothered to sign. Sue never really considered it before since she always just assumed the gifts she'd gotten from her aunt were also from her uncle. But he'd made a point of also giving her those cards. Why?

Then there were all those times when Laura had wanted Sue to come over for a sleep over or for dinner or just to hang out and her uncle had been against it. There was always some creative excuse and he tried to make sure that everyone understood that Sue would theoretically be welcome. But the fact was, she wasn't welcome. The only time she'd ever had dinner at their house was when Laura invited Reggy over and her brother asked Sue to accompany him.

Uncle Clark had never done anything to ever hint that he was her father. In fact, he'd kept her at arm's length away from him. And Sue never really mined or felt slighted. Her aunt was always doting on her anyway. But it shouldn't have been her aunt doting on her. It should have been her father. But Uncle Clark had never once done anything that a father should do for her. If anything, he quietly took pains to avoid her. And that was really all the proof that Sue needed to know that what her mother had said was true.

She had been scrolling through the pictures but rested on one where they were at an amusement park as a family. Right before the picture had been taken she and Laura had huddled together to make silly faces. They happened to be right in front of her uncle. She'd looked at that picture perhaps dozens of times over the years but only then did she notice the expression on her uncle's face. He was disgusted by her. He knew what she was and he wanted nothing to do with her.

She felt a sick feeling start to grow in her stomach. Just then she was remembering a conversation with Laura about who would walk her down the aisle when she got married. The only real choice seemed to be her uncle. But in that moment she suddenly knew that he would never agree to that. He'd rejected her.

She closed the lid and for a few moments just sat there. She'd never before thought of herself as ugly or unattractive but knowing that her own father wanted nothing to do with her made her start to question it. She felt her face and wondered if he could see something that she couldn't. Did the fact that he knew how she came into the world give him insight to see something was wrong with her that others couldn't?

She didn't know what to do about this. She didn't know what to think about this. At first it didn't seem like a problem but something about her uncle was bothering her. She felt a chill and then she was suddenly aware of the hard angles of the table. The stiff metal frame of the chair offered no comfort for her and she found herself moving from the dining room to her mother.

Sue sat on the sofa next to her mother and almost instantly she felt like she wanted to curl up next to her. The soft white leather gave away under her and molded itself to her while her mother put her free arm around her. Sue started to cry but couldn't put words as to why.

"What's wrong?" her mother asked.

Sue didn't respond. She just sobbed.

...

Reggy woke up the next morning still wearing the clothes from the night before. His room was hot and his face felt oily. He looked at his phone and checked to see if Laura had texted him back. Nope. Damn.