Moonlight Madness

They lay on the couch, ostensibly watching a movie. Neither one was paying attention, more interested in the closeness, the snuggles and handholding they were indulging in under the blanket that covered them from the inquisitive eyes of the friend on the other couch.

Both knew it was absolutely insane, that no matter what they felt it could never, ever go anywhere. They had been so close, so close before and held themselves back. This time, they knew there would be no going back.

Hands slid up less intimate skin, the gesture no less heated for not passing over secret places. She turned to smile at him, her head nestled on his shoulder like a bird in a nest. Comfortable, yet tense in a way both recognized and needed to assuage.

He kissed her, a light play of lips over lips, a tentative should we do this as they continued to stroke and murmur little words that meant nothing to anyone except themselves. And when she glanced over to see if their friend was awake, she knew she was lost.

Kisses became frantic, heated, a passion that neither had ever known. Touching, feeling, trying to not fall off the couch as tongues duelled and hands desperately sought the prize hidden underneath layers of clothing.

Realization set in that they were about to join on a couch where anyone could see them, anyone could tell and ruin everything that set in between them. This is insane, they agreed, kissing hard and grabbing a blanket as they whipped out the door, wrapping around each other for the few moments in the elevator before running, running to the car where she could snuggle in as he drove.

They made only one stop, to pick up the equipment to protect them both. It would, after all, be very difficult to keep the liaison a secret if there was a child. She climbed back in, he stroked her hair, and they drove off into the dark. She had no idea where they were going, only that it was dark, and the hand not needed for driving was instead slipping up her shorts to drive her absolutely wild.

Finally, finally, he stopped the car, pulled her over to him, and began to kiss her again before they opened the doors, grabbed the blanket, and ran down the little hill to the beach below.

He spread the blanket out, ready for them, but it was completely ignored in those first few heady moments when the moonlight shone down on her, and the waves crashed not ten feet from where they were standing. With a deftness that didn't surprise her in the least, he pulled her shirt over her head, reaching behind her to unsnap her bra even as she pressed quick, tiny kisses up neck, over his face before tugging on his earlobe with her teeth.

Her breath started coming in quick little gasps as his mouth moved down her body, suckling and tugging on her nipple until she thought she was going insane before moving over to the other and repeating the process. Broken, it was all she could do to moan his name, over and over and over until he grinned at her, and she yanked his shirt over his head to join hers somewhere on the beach behind them.

She didn't remember, later, how her pants came to end up in a heap at the end of the blanket, or when her tiny blue thong had joined them. She remembered him lowering her to the blanket, her neat and insistent removal of his belt to take his pants off. And she remembered the feeling of utter completion as he entered her, rubbing himself against her as he slowly worked his way in.

And when they were both laying on the blanket it the sand, sweaty and sated and sure, she rolled to look at him. Both knew they were mad, and both knew that it COULDN'T happen again, but secretly both hoped it wouldn't be the last time they were together, naked and warm and wanting.

She reached for him again, snuggling in close, and smiled the secret smile of a woman well pleased. He let her cuddle in for a few moments, then helped her up and began to gather their clothing together, separating his from hers and carefully rebuilding barriers that helped them both stay sane.

Hurt, she dressed and made her way behind him up the hill, and back into the car. He reached for her, pulling her into the seat next to him, and dropped a kiss on top of her head. He understood, if she didn't, how hard it was going to be to go back to being just friends.

He started the car, smiled at her, and suggested taking the long way home. Neither wanted the night to end, because in light there are no illusions. There are no soft shadows that hide what wants have exposed themselves to the light. When dawn came, they knew they would be separated again.

So they drove the winding roads, holding hands, talking lightly of things that didn't really matter because neither could say the things that did. Things like 'I love you', 'It matters' 'It isn't just a dream'. Both knew in that direction lay only madness and despair.

It was enough to make a grown girl cry, knowing the one that had been the source of her dreams as a child was costing her them now. Knowing that in loving his best friend, she was dooming herself... and yet being unable to walk away without sacrificing the part of herself that knew how to love.

And once the car pulled up to the apartments they had left so carelessly before, she looked at him with fear in her eyes and tears in her heart, knowing that to be rejected now would tear the best part of her away.

He grabbed her hand, and they slowly walked towards the door, unlocking it and taking the stairs up instead of the elevator this time. When they found the apartment dark and quiet, she followed him into his room where they stripped, snuggled in and started to watch a movie- and started the cycle all over again.

Sunlight found her asleep, sprawled across his bed, while he slipped out to figure things out in his mind on a long, long drive. He turned as he was leaving and looked at her, a half smile gracing his lips before he could suppress it. 'Blame it on the waning of the moon', he thought to himself as he left her dreaming.