Musing on the Age

With age is supposed to come wisdom. Well, I don't know about that. I probably have a few nuggets to pass on but then again, who would actually listen to an old fart like me.

Experience I have in spades and from that I have learned quite a few things. However, the same problem applies to this as to wisdom, who would listen.

So, with that said, I'm going to ramble on about a few things and see if anyone pays any attention.

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What got me started to thinking about this is my sixty-seventh birthday. I know, that sounds old to you but not to me. My grandfather on my mother's side was ninety-eight when he died. He was born in the 1860's. I was born in 1946. That is a lot of difference in time.

I think of the changes he saw in his lifetime. From wagons and horses, to cars and trucks. From trains to airplanes. From "Wagons, ho" to "One small step." From scattered farms and small towns to interstate highways and big cities.

He saw the start of the industrial revolution, sweat shops, unions, and two world wars. At the end of the Second World War is where I came in. He raised thirteen kids on a dirt farm, he was sheriff in a small town, he was a cop in a big city, he was a night watchman.

He was an old man sitting on a porch, tired and weary. That is how I last remember seeing him. I did not think at the time that, that might be me one day. At thirty, you are still invulnerable to age. I was thirty-eight when I realized that statistically I had reached middle age.

I can tell you exactly where I was when that happened. It was a sobering moment that lasted for maybe twenty minutes. Then my active mind moved on to something else. A wife, two kids, a house, and a Company to run were the name of the game then.

*****

Are the changes and new technology that he saw more profound than the ones I've seen? I guess that would depend on your starting viewpoint. From horses to a rocket to the moon is a big leap from anyone's viewpoint. From a fourteen inch, black and white TV with one station to a 52 or even 60-inch flat panel in color with three or four hundred stations is a big leap.

Then you throw in computers and cell phones and the world gets smaller by the second. Jet airliners made the world small; technology is making it smaller yet. It's still the same size but speed means time saved. I talk to people all around the world over the Internet everyday but seldom talk to my neighbor across the road.

A small world and far more people than ever. It has gotten a lot more crowded in my lifetime and I live in a rural area. Not the rural area of my grandfather where you had to ride your horse for miles before you saw anyone outside your immediate family. I have a little space but that is only rock throwing distance.

Driving into or through a large city is hazardous to your health. Everyone's in a hurry. That's one thing I learned. Take your time to smell the roses. Driving like crazy won't get you there much faster and it is a lot more dangerous to yourself and others. The minutes you save just ain't worth it.

Other than technology and more people, what have I seen?

The assassination of a President and the attempt on another. The killing of famous people and drive by shootings. The increase in violence and the disregard for human life in general has increased dramatically. People cry out about the killing of animals but say nothing about the gangs that roam their streets killing each other and bystanders.

People scream about starving people overseas but don't think about or realize that people are starving right here at home. Is that a small world or your head stuck in the sand? Sand is a better word than the first one that came to mind.

Am I saying anything here or just rambling? A little of both, most likely. I've always tried to keep my politics and religious beliefs to myself. It saves on wasted energy and frayed nerves, not to mention friendships and such. I guess that would have made me a member of the silent majority at one time. Now, it's just common sense.

Speaking of which, when did common sense die? Or good manners for that matter. I remember beatniks, I remember hippies. I was too young to be one and too worn out by Vietnam to be the other. Then there was the me generation and now it's the fuck you generation.

And don't get me started on Wall Street and the housing market bullshit. It didn't affect me in the least but I know a lot of folks that got wiped out by one or both. Both were ridicule. Common sense was all that was needed to sidestep them but greed and the need to be better than everyone else won that one for the most part.

*****

Last but far from least is sex. Been there and done that every chance I got. I probably should have passed on some of it but... You live and you learn. Also, life would not have been nearly as much fun if I had. The worse I ever got was better than none. There is no such thing as a bad blowjob. Some are just better than others. The things you learn if you live long enough.

If I had known I was going to live this long, I would have taken much better care of myself. But then again, as with sex, the ride wouldn't have been nearly as much fun. If you don't like pain then don't grow old. I hurt in places I never knew I had when I was fifty. Of course the alternatives to not growing old suck just as bad. You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't.

Life is a no win situation. The few people who have gotten out of this world alive have had to come back sooner or later. So in the end it boils down to enjoy what you can as much as you can and endure the rest. Love often, love fiercely and freely, and completely. You might never get back to something you passed up on the way. I have some of those regrets.

So, would I change anything? Sure, everyone would. There are always things you could have done differently but once done, there you are. I had a dream when I got out of high school but my life went another way. If it hadn't, would I be a different person? Probably. Would I be a better person? There is no way to answer that for sure. There is only maybe and that is not an answer.

So here I am. I wonder if what I have written now will be the same later on. Will any of these ramblings mean the same as they do now? Only time will tell. It's been one hell of a ride so far and I hope it stays as interesting as it has been all the way to the end. But then again, what other options do I have.

Live, Love, and above all else, have fun. If you are not having fun in life, you are doing something wrong. My grandfather told me that almost fifty years ago. It's still true today.