My Ex-Files Ch. 03: Naughty Nightclub

Names are changed to protect the guilty. Everything else is exactly as I remember it.

Whispers was always a terrible nightclub. It was one of those places you would never plan to go to but then after about the fifth drink with the gang after work on a Friday you'd somehow find yourself there anyway. The kind of place where married men would slip their wedding rings into their pocket, buy you drinks you didn't ask for, then call you a bitch if your knicker-elastic didn't instantly dissolve in proximity to a sugary cocktail. The kind of place where divorced women would dress in outfits fifteen years too young for them and two sizes too small, and writhe their hips with ever more salacious, slutty desperation the closer it got to 3am, as the booze and their fear of spending the night alone overcame their self-esteem. You know the kind of place I mean.

Gavin was my partner in crime. We worked in different departments at the same company, so we'd only really spend time together when we were socialising. He was really quite camp and when we first met I assumed he was gay. He wasn't, but the last I'd known he had a girlfriend & I guess I'd probably had a boyfriend not long before that evening too. I'd never really thought about whether I fancied him, he was my mate and we always had a laugh together at work parties and suchlike.

As the evening played out, most of the rest of our colleagues had wimped out and gone home. A couple of the girls from HR were still on the prowl on the dancefloor, extracting as many drinks from horny men as they could. Gav and I were just chatting, catching up on each other's gossip about work and our love lives. Then, as we were so fond of doing, we began bitching and giggling about some of the people in the club. Before long we were imagining what they would be doing in about an hour's time. To begin with, we were just being really mean.

"See those two over there?" Gav nodded towards a couple wrapped around each others bodies on the dancefloor. "He's going back to her place, and when she stands over him & unzips her dress so much flesh is going to fall out and tumble all over him that he'll think she'd been smuggling an octopus in there."

"See the couple making out in the dark corner over there?" I added. "When he gets her home she will unzip his hideous leather jeans and where she thinks there is a bulge, she's going to find the pair of bundled up football socks he's got stuffed in there."

As we continued in that vein, the stories got a little less cruel and a bit more, shall we say, vivid. "You see her there with the short spangly dress, tottering on her high heels? She's about to give up, go home, strip off and shower herself, rubbing the sponge between her legs and thinking about all the ones who got away. She'll then dive into her collection of vibrators, take out the really big fat one at the back, lie down, close her eyes and not open them again until the batteries run out, sometime tomorrow morning."

"See what Val & Caroline are up to?" Gav gestured towards our two remaining work colleagues, who were both dancing with the same young, and I would have to admit, rather handsome man. "They can't agree which one of them gets to cop off with Muscles there. So they both take him to a cheap hotel round the corner. They plan to have a threesome but as soon as they begin to undress, Val & Caroline have to admit to themselves what the rest of us have known for years, they are both raging lezzers who want nothing more than to dive between each others' sweaty thighs and munch the rugs until dawn. They forget all about poor old Muscles, who spends an hour or so watching before giving up, knocking off a quick wank and leaving them too it."

And so on, each story getting a little bit more explicit and a little bit less funny, until one of us had to admit what was going on. We had already been whispering in each other's ears, pressing our legs and hips together in the double seat as we giggled and gossiped. I moved myself closer still and asked. "Imagine we were those people sitting over there, looking at you and me here and playing the same game. What do you think they would say about us? There was a moment's pause before he replied.

"They would say that those two are so damned sexy that they won't be able to keep their hands off each other long enough to make it out of the club. They are going to have to sneak off to a cubicle in the toilets where she will press her hands between his legs and feel a huge cock that is already swollen hard. She won't be able to resist falling to her knees and taking it into her mouth and sucking it until he turns her around, bends her over, lifts her skirt up over her bum, pulls her knickers to one side and slides his hard cock smoothly and quickly into her wet, waiting cunt for him to fuck her hard, fast and rough."

I just sat there for what felt like a lifetime, breathing heavily, taking in what he was saying. Eventually I managed "So, would they be right about the huge hard cock?" He smiled at me with a wicked glint I had never seen in his eyes before.

"Well, they might be exaggerating about the huge part. The rest of it could not be any more true."

"I am really fucking horny now."

"I'm so horny I might explode."

"What would I have to do to make you explode?"

"Maybe touching just one small part of you."

"Which part?"

"Do you know, when you lean forward I can see the curves of your breasts all the way down nearly to your nipples. I think I might just burst if I was to stroke the soft white skin all along the hem of your top."

"And if I pulled the hem of my top lower, below the nipple what then?"

"Then I would have to lean forward and flick the very tip with my tongue before softly sucking your nipple between my lips and kissing it like a little baby bird."

That was the point of no return. I took his hand firmly in my own and stood up, saying "Come with me."

The toilets in Whispers were downstairs in the basement. I led Gav rapidly across the dancefloor and down the steps. People were coming & going to the loo but I avoided all eye contact & without a moment of hesitation I dragged Gav into the Ladies.

There were a couple of girls doing their lippy at the basins & for a panicked moment I thought there were no stalls free. I pushed on each of the doors in turn and my heart leapt when the third or fourth swung open. I pulled Gav inside & snibbed the door.

From that second on it was frantic mayhem. We were squeezed into a tiny stall. Gav grabbed at my top, pulling it up & over my head then almost immediately he pulled my bra upwards, letting my tits hang large and naked. Much more roughly than his whispered promise, he leaned down and sucked hard on my nipple. I loved it, I felt it tingle in my clit and it felt like my pussy was turning inside out with lust and hunger.

I reached for his belt and his flies, tearing them open, and pushing his jeans and shorts down his thighs. His cock sprang out and upwards, pointing rigidly towards my chin. To be honest it wasn't the largest I had ever seen but it was more than enough to make a girl happy. I giggled and said "So they weren't exaggerating."

With that I dropped to my knees, just as he had described and took his length between my lips.

I could quite happily have sucked him to a climax like that, there and then, but he had other ideas. After just a minute or two, he put his hands under my armpits & lifted me to my feet. He reached into the pocket of his jeans around his ankles, and dived into his wallet. I was confused for a second until he took out a condom & ripped open the packet. In one smooth swipe of his hand he rolled it on then he spun me around and held by hands against the door, leaning forward, while he stood behind me.

Around this point, despite my overwhelming lust & excessive alcohol intake, I began to notice that we must have been making a lot of banging & clattering noises, rattling the walls and door of the stall. I head a woman's voice say "for fuck's sake you two, get a room" but I was well past caring. I felt Gav's hands cup my tits from behind and squeeze them deliciously. His foot kicked my instep, pushing my legs wider apart. I felt my skirt being hiked up over my arse then a hand push under the thin lacy fabric of my knickers, fingers slipping straight into me, opening me up, spreading my wetness over my pussylips and clitoris. Then just as promised, in one smooth, firm stroke, I felt his adorable cock fill my aching cunt.

It was hard, fast and rough, his body pressing against mine, pushing me into the stall door, thumping, banging making me grunt and moan.

As so often with really great sex, it felt like time was standing still, but with hindsight it was probably only a few minutes before it all went terribly, embarrassingly wrong. There was a knocking on the main door into the ladies then a rough, angry sounding male voice. "This is security. Would everyone please vacate this facility now. If you are making use of a cubicle please finish up and leave as soon as possible."

Shit. We'd been snitched. I pretty much froze but Gav was at a point where he wasn't stopping for anyone. He only needed a few more thrusts & he was cumming as he fucked me, my body tensed up just as I felt him spasming, trembling gripping me tight and then whispering in my ear. "Fuck fuck fuck, what do we do?"

At that point there was a hard rapping on our cubicle door. "In there. We know what's going on. Please both of you leave with me right this moment or I shall be forced to call the police and you shall both risk arrest for gross indecency."

Both of us quickly scrabbled to get our clothes back on, shrugged & opened the stall. Two bouncers stood there, looking at us like they'd had a very, very long evening & our slutty shenanigans were the last straw. They each took one of us, gripping our upper arm, and frogmarched us out of the toilet, up the stairs and towards the main entrance, before unceremoniously dumping us out on the street.

"Our coats!" Gav exclaimed. They were still in the cloakroom. The nightclub doors had been well and truly slammed after us.

"I think we better come back for those tomorrow, babe. Those bouncers didn't look like they were in a mood to wait for us."

Gav took me home in a taxi after that. We didn't say much on the way. We'd been brought back to earth with a bang, if you'll pardon the pun, and I suddenly felt more than a little awkward. I asked if he wanted to come in for coffee but was quite relieved when he said no. We stayed friends until I changed jobs a few months later, but we never had sex again and never even discussed what had happened that evening. It was a one-moment stand.

And I never did go back to collect my coat.