My Second Me

We all have fantasies, we all have dreams - few of us ever share them for fear of upsetting a loved one or shocking a friend. We are all individual, and that is probably what makes us so complex!

So what would we do if we achieved our fantasy?

Imagine the one thing that excites us and gets us high! How would we deal with it? Think of it another way...

Can we all achieve our dreams?

We all want things, we all want to better ourselves. When we are young, our dreams are selfish, but as we get older, we start to think about the people around us. Money & happiness are the two most popular dreams that people have.

So, what about real dreams? The dreams we all have when we are asleep?

Dreams can be entertaining, disturbing, bizarre, and sometimes very vivid. They can make you feel happy, sad, or scared. Dreams may seem confusing or perfectly rational, but they are very intricate. Sigmund Freud believed that dreams are a window into our subconscious. He thought dreams were a way for people to satisfy their personal urges and desires that were unacceptable to society. I personally believe that our dreams reflect our own underlying thoughts and feelings and our deepest desires.

The problem is, how many times do you share a dream with someone and they just look at you as if you're mad? You try to explain to them that it felt real! We all know that look when people just stare at you as if you have just gone crazy, but how do you explain a dream when it actually feels real? Have you ever had a dream when you know within yourself and in your mind that somehow you were actually there - actually in a dream, and that it somehow happened, but you can't explain it or prove it? Unfortunately what usually happens when people give us that crazy look is; we finish up, regretting sharing it with them! And we realise it was a bad idea telling them, we kick ourselves and try to reason with it in our heads until it just goes away! So, what happens? It means that most of us live with our dreams inside our heads - they stay there hidden and we never tell anyone about them.

So, I want to change that! I want to share with you something that I can't explain!

Now before I start, I know that I am not crazy - trust me, I'm not. Unfortunately I also know that I am not classed as being highly educated either, because I don't have fancy degrees or A levels, but I do know that I'm not stupid. I live my life and always have done by being logical - it's an easy way to solve problems. A lot of people use it, but don't realise they are using it. Recognising the skill of logic is the secret. But trust me; no logic will be able to explain what I'm going to tell you.

There have been a few reports over the years of ordinary people who have come face to face with someone who is identical to themselves, while random chance would seem to exclude the likelihood of randomly encountering an individual who is identical to yourself! It isn't impossible!

So, the question is; do we all have an identical double? Do they exist?

I have heard the theory before, but did not know there was a name for it until I researched it and found the word 'doppelganger' - the word is German, and it means a 'look-alike' or double of a living person. It is sometimes portrayed as a ghostly or paranormal phenomenon. In modern times, the term 'twin stranger' is occasionally used. Basically, the word means a double or identical replica of a person. It suggests that everyone has an identical copy of themselves somewhere in the world!

So, what is the chance of randomly encountering an individual who is physically identical to yourself? Is it impossible?

In Irish folklore, it was believed that one's Doppelganger or 'Fetch' in Irish terms was an evil omen. If you saw your Fetch walking on the horizon, it meant something bad was about to happen to you. There are many explanations for the doppelganger phenomenon. Mystics throughout the ages have believed they are supernatural creatures: either spiritual copies of the person or downright demonic twins. Scientists say they're just electrical glitches of the brain, or mental illnesses such as schizophrenia.

Most people agree that the concept of a Doppelganger is little more than a Myth. Or is it?

The easiest way to start this story is at the beginning...

In 2008, I was 32, unmarried, but living the dream that most men desire. Women were my weakness. Since puberty, I had always loved women - I loved everything about them! The way they looked, the way they dressed. Women to me were like a drug. Most men probably hated me because my success with women was so good; it was rare that I didn't talk a girl under the bed sheets. My job probably helped! I was a fire-fighter - girls love fire-fighters! They love the uniform and virtually anything about the job. Most of the guys I worked with were married, but most of them could tell stories of how good the job had been to them sexually. Yes, being a fire-fighter turned me into most girls' fantasy! I was based in London at a famous fire station in Soho. All the funny comments never stopped because of the association to Soho and the sex industry, but to be honest it really didn't have any effect on the area that we covered.

Soho is central to the West End - famous for large department stores and theatres. In the nineties, Soho Council worked hard to clean up the unsavoury image of the sex dens & shops that surrounded the area. In reality it was too late - the sex industry was moving away from shops and moving over to the internet. Soho Council thought they were being clever and had closed the sex industry down. All they did was push the owners out, then found they had rows of shops closed that no one could afford! I always had a vision of some spinster who was ugly and fat, thinking she had saved the world, finally being told she was redundant due to the lost revenue that she had created due to her feminist views on the sex industry. Soho still had sex bars & shops, but the old days of an obvious place to go for a relatively safe shag was gone. It wouldn't be until around two thousand that Soho started to reinvent itself by introducing restaurants to the district. This meant more work for our station under the strict fire acts and Health & Safety regulations, and according to the older fire officers, boring places to visit unlike the sex shops they had looked after in the past.

The shifts I worked in the Fire brigade allowed all of us to work second jobs - I worked with one of the lads on the shift fitting burglar & fire alarms. Most of the work was on reputation -the money was good and offered non-stop frustrated women who all wanted to be shagged! They were either married or businesswomen that liked a bit of rough - sometimes it was the daughter in the house! But nearly everywhere I went, I never suffered getting a shag. Long term relationships and me didn't work, I can't explain why I was like that! What I did know was - I loved sex. My reputation at the station was well known, and the names like 'Valentino', 'Fanny Magnet' down to 'sheep shagger' were all part of the banter within the station. There were some girls that I really liked, but I couldn't commit to what they wanted. I loved being myself and being free - nothing shocked me in sex. I had obvious morals, like their age, and no animals, and shit like that, but other than that, as far as I was concerned - anything goes!

I had met a girl called Maria, she was completely off what I normally went with, but there was something about her that really turned me on. Maria was a Goth, really in to dark clothes and horror makeup, but she was really funny and really hot in bed. I felt I had to tell Maria that I was not the man for her! I told her several times, and on each occasion she told me to 'shut up and just shag her'. I guess out of all the girls that I was seeing, she was kind of a regular shag - it seemed to work for her like it did for me. She was educated, had a nice flat in Wembley, and worked in a record store. You would never put us together, but when we were together, it was fun. Nothing shocked Maria. She was kinky, but made it seem normal. She loved it up the arse, which I found a real turn on! A lot of the girls I shagged were very nervous about that kind of sex, even though they usually gave the impression that they were a dirty bitch! I had been seeing Maria on and off for about nine months when she announced she was going to a party in a club, and 'if I was free, she wanted to take me'. It was on a Friday night and she said 'it would be a really good night'. I was not working and said I would go. Maria said she was delighted, but I 'would have to dress up for the club if I was going to get in'.

Maria explained that the way I dressed was boring and I should relax a bit and experience a walk on the wild side. I thought about it and agreed that I would try anything once. She was delighted and said we 'had 2 weeks to prepare my new look'. Ten days passed and Maria sent me a text, asking if I could pop round. I sent a text back explaining I was on days, but would finish at 7 and be with her by 8. I had had my mobile phone for about four years - it was amazing! Everyone was getting one! And now we could send a text message to people who had one as well! Sending text ten years ago was amazing because it was instant, without talking.

I got to Maria's flat at about eight thirty - she looked really hot. Her hair was spiked. She was wearing a short PVC skirt, and a T-shirt with a black & white print on the front with some band name, her makeup was grey face and lots of black eyeliner and purple lipstick, she had boots on, but they were military looking. Somehow this pretty girl made the 'Goth look' so horny!

"OK...let's see what you look like with makeup!"

'Makeup? What the fuck is she on about?'

"Makeup? what do you mean?"

Maria stared at me, "What? You're frightened of wearing makeup?"

The silence was chilling.

"Why do I have to wear makeup?"

Maria leaned forward "Because you're my Bitch!"

I started to laugh - it was a nervous laugh! I had never seen Maria like this!

"What the fuck are you on about?" I looked over at the sofa and saw some clothes laid out.

"Do you like them, Terry? You'll look so hot in them!"

On the sofa was a PVC t-shirt, and what looked like a leather skirt. I walked over to take a closer look - it was a leather skirt! I looked round to see if I could see any jeans or trousers, but there were none.

"I'm not wearing a fucking skirt, Maria!"

"Terry...for fucks sake! Why don't you chill out and relax for once? You will love it! No one will know you! It will be so cool! Trust me...this will open your eyes!"

Maria walked over to me, grabbed my cock with one hand and started to play with my left nipple through my t-shirt. My cock was rock hard! I could not explain it, but for some reason the thought of going to a party where nobody knew me in disguise really sounded exciting!

"Let's try your makeup!"

Maria sat me down on the sofa and started to apply my makeup. It seemed to take forever as she slowly applied cream to my face, then powder, followed by eye liner and lipstick. I have no idea why I let her do it to me, but for some reason I seemed to be under a spell and I didn't want to break it.

"OK, lover boy...let's see if you like it?" She grabbed my hand and dragged me to the bathroom. "Take a look...let's see if you like your new look!?"

I stared into the mirror - I was shocked! I looked really horny! It was makeup on a guy - and it looked really good!

"You look so fucking horny, Terry!"

She pulled me close to her and started to kiss me. I fell deeper into her spell as I closed my eyes and she massaged my balls. Before I knew what was happening, Maria had pulled my trousers down and was on her knees sucking my cock. She swallowed my cock deep into her mouth and put both her hands on my nipples and played with them, squeezing them playfully as my cock got harder and harder. Her cold wet lips explored every part of my cock. I sat helplessly with my eyes shut as she teased me to the point of orgasm. I started to moan as the sensation of ecstasy started to run though my body. Maria suddenly stopped sucking my cock and eased away from my legs and looked up...

"You're not going to cum until you're dressed as my Bitch!"

The whole atmosphere in the room changed. I looked up at Maria - she was now standing above me.

"Get dressed...I want to see what you look like!"

"Jesus, Maria...what are you on? I was just about to cum!"

"I know, you dirty Bitch! Well if you want to cum, you can get dressed for me! Put them on! Do it! Hurry up!"

I looked over at the clothes; I hadn't seen the studded collar and the chains lying next to them.

"Are you fucking serious?"

Maria smiled "Get dressed, Bitch!"

Maria walked back in to the kitchen and started to drink a glass of white wine, "You need to loosen up, Tel...start to enjoy life! Remember, your dead for a very long time! you will love the club!"

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I then looked over to the t-shirt...

'What the fuck! Why not?!'

I slipped my trousers down and took them off, then I removed my t-shirt. I looked at the clothes, took another deep breath and picked up the T-shirt - it wrapped itself round my hands and felt really nice! I opened the bottom of the t-shirt and poked my head through. I could smell the strong PVC - for some reason it smelt really horny. I pulled it down and slid my arms in - it was cold, but felt incredible! I pulled it down - it was a perfect fit. I picked up the skirt - it had silver chains hanging from the waist.

"No, darling...you need to put the tights on first!"

I looked down and saw a black pair of tights sitting alongside the collar. "Jesus! Tights as well?"

"You're my Bitch...stop complaining!"

I picked up the tights, sat down and took my socks off and started to roll up my tights - they were thick and seemed to have holes in them. Once they were pulled up, I took hold of the skirt; it was heavy due to the chains hanging down. I stepped into the skirt and pulled the zip up.

"Well look at you!? Aren't you the Bitch on heat? Take a look at how yummy you look! Go in my bedroom and check yourself out!"

I walked into the bedroom - the light was on and I stared at myself in the long mirror. Jesus Fuck! I looked really good, but I was still a guy with the makeup! I don't know why, but I really liked what I saw.

"See...I told you! Lie on the bed, babe!"

I got on the bed.

"Move down a bit!"

I moved down so my legs were over the bed.

"Close your eyes, Bitch!"

I felt Maria climb on the bed, then the darkness absorbed me. I felt her legs over my head - I could smell the PVC of her skirt over my face - it was addictive! As the skirt covered my head, I felt her ease down on to my face. Her clit was wet - I could taste the cum as she pushed her clit on to my mouth.

"Suck my clit, Bitch!" Maria screamed the order as I frantically licked her warm wet clit, pushing my tongue into her clit. She pushed it down onto my face as my mouth and tongue explored her. She started to shake and scream as she orgasmed in my mouth - the sweet hot creamy cum filled my mouth as my tongue searched for more hot orgasm. Maria frantically moved her hips up and down on my face as she screamed again - having another orgasm. Up and down with her clit tight against my mouth - I struggled to breathe as she got faster. Unbelievably she was orgasming again! She pushed her clit harder onto my face as she screamed out. Maria eased herself off my face and collapsed on to the bed. She pulled herself down to me where I was breathing heavily. She leaned over and started to kiss me again.

"I want to taste my cum, Bitch! Kiss me!"

I turned my head and our lips met. Maria was frantic as she kissed me, exploring my mouth and lips with her tongue. We were both breathing heavy - it was very erotic! She stopped kissing me - I could see her chest moving up and down - she started to get her breath back. Maria was not gasping, but her sexual appetite for making love had left her breathless.

"Do you know why I love being a Goth? I love it because the Goth culture is one of Diversity! Goth's share a love of sharing things that most people consider 'dark'! Being a Goth is not about the way you dress!"

It was true! In general, Goth people love mythology, the mysterious, the supernatural, culture, tradition, romanticism - and basically hold onto things in society that they feel are important and dying out. Put simply, a Goth is someone who finds beauty in things others consider 'dark'. They love all that is dark and mysterious. That doesn't mean Goths are evil! It just means, they have a different perspective to many.

"So, you dirty Bitch...do you want to cum?"

I nodded in silence. Maria pulled herself up and undid her PVC skirt. She had an amazing body! Her short black hair made her look like a cross between Demi Moore, the actress, and Danni Minogue, the singer. She was stunning!

Maria started to pull on my skirt, "Take this off, Bitch!"

I raised my hips and pulled the skirt down. My cock was screaming hard inside the black nylon prison, my balls were boiling over! Maria ran her little finger up my stocking leg - she paused as she got to my cock...

"Oh my Goodness...look at you!? I think that you need to release all that cum, don't you?"

I nodded, "Fuck yes...so much!"

"Well I think you need to prove to me just how controlled you are! Lift your bum up and put your hands behind your back! Sit on your hands and give yourself bondage! Do not move your hands...this is about you controlling the bondage!"

Maria removed her T-shirt slowly, revealing a PVC bra - her nipples were rock hard! She leaned over my head - her breasts were amazing! She lowered herself down so my mouth could suck one of her nipples - it pointed out through the PVC. I put my teeth round it and began to bite the nipple. Maria screamed and whispered "Oh God, yes...harder! Bite it harder!"

As I swapped between each breast, Maria seemed to go into some kind of trance. She next straddled my hips and leaned down to my face - both her hands were free as they started to tease my nipples through the PVC T-shirt.

"Don't you dare cum!"

Maria adjusted herself so that her clit was above my rock hard cock. She lowered herself down onto my cock - and in a teasing way began to stroke my cock with her clit lips. She expertly guided herself onto my cock and pushed down slowly - the head of my cock eased into her soft warm pussy - my cock seemed to just glide into her! Then I felt the lips of her pussy pushing against my pubic hair. My cock felt like it was being held by silky hands, massaging it into orgasm! Maria started to ease up and down on my cock - I could no longer hold out - I felt the orgasm paralyse my body like a massive shiver overwhelming me - the cum raced through my cock at an uncontrollable speed! I have never known such an orgasm in my life! Our hips moved as one, and we frantically fucked each other. I was so high! Just as I believed my orgasm was over, a second wave began! I have never felt the feeling of the second orgasm - it seemed to be part of the first one, but this was clearly a second wave. I gasped for air as the second orgasm shot through my body, as the cum came through for a second time. I opened my eyes and looked at Maria, except for a split second it was not her. I can't explain what I saw, but for that one moment I was not fucking Maria - it was someone else. With my second orgasm complete, I freed my hands, held Maria's hips, eased them up to her back, and pulled her down so her head was close to mine. Maria was gasping for breath as I kissed her - she rolled off me and lay still, staring at the ceiling.