NO

I showed up on the dot at seven, wearing my best suit. As my wife of six years can tell you, she never did cure me of saying stupid things, although our five year old daughter is trying to help her. I don't know if it's genetics or training, but even as stupid as I can be sometimes, I knew better than complain about it.

I didn't get her in bed until we married, nine months after the first date. All I can tell you is it was worth the wait.

And it's Captain Sweet Cheeks now. I may say stupid things, but calling her Sweet Cheeks is public is not one of them. She likes it in the bedroom, though.

Ginger did see someone, part of her probation. I don't know if it helped or not. She remarried, twice, and the second one seems to be a keeper. Seems he keeps her on a pretty tight leash, and reminds her of me when she gets out of hand, telling her I'm not the only one who plays the long game. It seems to keep her centered, at least to the cousin that told me about it. All I can say is good for her.

...

Our daughter Kelly got married today. Our wedding present to her was my grandmother's old house. Heather never really liked it, and when my parents passed we moved into their house, a big, two story, rambling old farmhouse. Our son Mark will get it when we pass, which won't be any time soon, I hope.

After Kelly left on her honeymoon, I surprised Chief Sweet Cheeks with tickets to one of those river cruises,a twenty-fifth wedding anniversary present. She'd always wanted to go, and I'd finally saved up the money to take her. Two weeks rambling through Europe, her dream vacation. It got me some really good loving, and a rare shot at her backdoor. She says she likes it, but I think she only does it to please me, and despite my many faults, being a selfish asshole doesn't seem to be one, so I only take what she decides to give, and I'm happy with it. I have to go now, Sweet Cheeks is calling me back to bed, giving me a little blue pill and a glass of water. Looks like it's going to be a very nice vacation.