Not Going to Happen

"You know if you sleep with him we're done."

"Don't you think I know that? Why in the hell do you think we're sitting here talking about it? I probably could have snuck around and fucked in in a motel at lunch months ago and you never would have been the wiser. But, I couldn't do that to you, I'm too honest."

"But not too honest to tell me you've got the hots for some other guy and have already mind fucked him. Technically that already is cheating."

"Give me a break! You've never taken another woman to bed in your mind? Please! I've seen you in the damn mall. You like every other guy there never miss the good-looking ones strolling by. How stupid do you think I am? Can you honestly say that in twenty-five years, while we've made love, you haven't thought of someone else? Even I'm not that good."

"Well, where do we go from here? Are you going to sleep with him? Because if you are, I hope you do it soon so I can move on with my life. Right now I'm just marking time with you here and I can't afford anymore broken toes." She didn't smile and neither did I.

"I've just got to get him out of my damn head some how. He's like a damn drug. I look at him and all I want to do is rip his clothes off. Hell, he's not even that good looking, and like I said, he's an asshole."

"Well, when you figure it out let me know, but for right now I'll sleep in Tim's room."

"Steve, I need you close and in my bed next to me," Rhonda shot back.

"Not going to happen. I've been there for months and it's done me no good, you still think about him, not me. So, like I said, when you're over him let me know, but don't wait too long."

It went on for two more months. We ate together, lived together and even had sex a couple of times. It was good, but any sex right now would have been good at this stage. Then I had a brain fart. I was treating her too good. I was a known quantity, a nice guy. It had worked for over twenty years, but didn't anymore.

The NEW Steve greeted my wife Friday. I made a fabulous breakfast, for one, she did manage to scavenge a half-cup of coffee. Now, if she wanted anything from me, it was going to cost her.

I did nothing around the house and when she bitched, I just got in my car and left. When I started going out to dinner by myself and she got upset, I told her to call Stewart and leave me the hell alone.

"Steve, I want you, not Stewart. I want our old life back."

"You've got to be kidding me? You had that life for over twenty years and hated it. Get use to your new life sweetheart."

There was no more lovemaking only selfish sex. I made sure she got off, but only after I was done. Sometimes I was so rough with her I even scared myself. Rhonda at first couldn't get enough of it but after a month started to pull back. Maybe the crush had faded.

"I'm not happy," is how she started it Friday after work. I was in the process of changing to go out with a few buddies while she talked.

"I thought you wanted a new life with what's his name, yeah, Stewart. How's he doing anyway?" I asked.

"Don't know, haven't seen him in a couple of months." That was something new.

"Well, I'm sure you'll find someone else. You're a good-looking and from what I can remember used to be pretty decent in bed." Had to get in that last dig.

"I don't want anyone new, I want you."

"You had me, but didn't want the old Steve if memory serves me right. So now, I don't care anymore. You do what you want and I'll do the same." This wasn't how she wanted the conversation to go.

"Can you stay home tonight? We can talk and see if we can come up with some type compromise. Please!"

"I don't know, we've been planning this night for weeks and it would be kind of rude for me to back out at the last minute and all." Hell, in actuality it was just the four of us guys getting together for a couple of brews and a lot of bullshit.

"Please! I'm afraid if this goes on too much longer we won't have a marriage any longer, and that would be a real travesty. I really do love you."

"Well if you put it that way, maybe I could pass on tonight, but only if you cook a good dinner." Her eyes light up.

"Just give me an hour or so." Tonight was going to be interesting.

Stewart may not have been a true bad boy, but his arrogant, self-assured attitude had an effect on his wife. Was she a latent submissive? I doubted that fact but couldn't deny that he turned her on. What she hadn't foresee, was that she would really miss the Good Old Boy Steve, and rather quickly.

I didn't let the adage that, the grass is greener across the street, remain as such. I didn't play her game; I took away the once comfortable life she once had and replaced it with I thought what she was looking for. She didn't like her new reality.

"Steve, can we go back to what we once had?"

"Rhonda, like I said before, you weren't satisfied with our old life. I don't know what you were looking for and at this point I really don't care."

"Don't you still love me?" I could see in her eyes Rhonda was pleading at this point.

"I guess I still do, but your attitude that you didn't know if you could remain faithful to me hurt me, hurt me a lot."

"Steve, I didn't do anything," she stopped. "Okay, I did do things that I shouldn't have and I regret every one of them now. It didn't take long after our last discussion to realize what an ass Stewart was and that he couldn't care less about me; that is unless I decided to go to bed with him. Which I didn't!" I let that statement hang in the air.

"And so, you want what now?"

"You, without the attitude. I want my loving husband back. The one that pampered me and made me feel secure in his arms."

"And how about if that man is gone and permanently replaced with the New Steve?"

"Well then, you can't imagine how sorry I'll be for wrecking a great marriage over something that probably never would have happened anyway."

We took a break and had dinner. I needed to think.

Her foreplay began at dinner and Rhonda took it up a notch while we cleaned up afterwards. No words were spoken; we'd done a lot of that before and got us nowhere. A bump, a touch, a smile, she was pulling out all the stops. When she handed me an after dinner drink, I took it, smiled and gave her a peck on the lips.

The warm liquid lit a fire in me as I watched her sip on her drink and tongue the rim of her glass. Would there be sex tonight or would it be lovemaking. I wanted the later.

Hell, we didn't last five minutes. With our half finished drinks left on the counter, I dragged her ass to bed. She was wide eyed when I literally ripped her clothes off and pushed her back on the bed. Looking maybe a little fearful, I could see the resolve leave her face; it wasn't going to be lovemaking, but the same raw sex she'd had to accept over the last month. I think I saw a tear.

When I stripped and lay down on the bed next to her she didn't move. I think she was just waiting for the onslaught, but that didn't happen.

It started off slow and hesitantly, but we re-bonded that night and made tender and gentle love. It went on for hours and for the first time in a long while we fell asleep in each other's arms.

Did that one night solve all our problems? Not by a long shot. We had issues that needed to be addressed and over the next two months, we had more than a few difficult discussions. I wasn't going to let it drop. She'd started something that needed to be finally buried; I wasn't going to have to deal with it again in the future.

Rhonda still doesn't exactly understand how or why it happened, but she knows now that if it ever does again, we're done, I'm not going through it again.

Does she still lust after other guys? I don't think so, but when we walk around in the mall, and I see dynamite looking girl I give her hand a little squeeze and smile. We both know what it means and are secure in the fact that we'll be together always... because that's what people who are in love do.