Notes of a Fastidious Woman

'Because something happened to her the last time we did it. She started by exclaiming, "I'm doing you with my big bad bum-bum," - her bottom is rather big - and then she became inspired and erotic doggerel came pouring out of her mouth. Such as, "Bliss I find with your love up my behind," and, "I've got a lovely botty-hole, stretch it with your lovey-pole."'

Annabel noted this and said, 'That does sound fairly conclusive. Will she get her husband back, do you think?'

'When I asked Cynthia how Elaine might restart the relationship, Cynthia said, "Well, I've had the devil of a job keeping him away from my rear entrance these last few months."'

'So she was the Other Woman.'

'Yes. But apparently there's a vigorous young combine harvester dealer in the next village with a weakness for older women, so she's ready to send Elaine's husband back. And I flatter myself he'll find a warmer welcome at home than he could ever have imagined.'