Off the Top

byWet Miranda©

I recently went to New Orleans, and found the coolest club. It was like no other bar I had ever seen in my life. I just have to tell you about what happened that night. Here is a log of that night's events, from both my perspective and from my friend Darlene's perspective.

9:00 P.M., New Orleans, 85 degrees out.

My name is Miranda. I am 29, 5"7, have medium lenght red hair, medium sized tits that are soft and round, and nice legs. Also, I just love to show off my body. My friend Darlene and I are on vacation. She is very tall and attractive, and has long blonde hair. There are two more things you need to know about her that are relevant to this story. One, she is very shy. She is attractive, but she never wears clothing to show off her lovely figure. She hardly ever will wear a bikini on the beach. The second thing you need to know about Darlene is that she has enormous breasts. I'm talking double D cups. Nice and round, all natural too. Part of this story is going to be from my point of view, and part from her's.


Darlene and I drove to a bar I had heard about on the other end of New Orleans from our hotel. I drove. This place was called Off the Top, and I knew what it was all about but Darlene didn't. Off the Top was a new bar in town, and they had a killer gimmick to get customers. Here is how it works: Guys have to pay a $20 cover. Girls get in free and drink half price. (Discrimination, you guys say? Tough luck!) But here is the kicker. At Off the Top, no shirts or tops of any kind are allowed once you are inside the club. That's right, the dress code is mandatory toplessness for both guys and girls.

We get into the front foyer of the club. There is a bouncer, and a coat/shirt check. The sign clearly states the rules: No tops allowed past this point. Absolutely no exceptions.

I am all excited about this. Darlene says "What the fuck is this place? No way! I'm NOT taking off my shirt." I laugh to myself and say, "Well I am. I have the car, so I guess you'll just have to walk somewhere or take a cab back to the hotel." I knew full well that she wouldn't go back, because she knew no one else in town, just the two of us came here together from Florida.

I take off my black tank top and white bra and give it to the shirt checker. Darlene just stands there and pouts with her arms crossed over her chest. I walk past into the door to the main part of the club, past the bouncer. (A big African American gentlemen with a nice muscular chest..and no shirt.)


I can't believe what a bitch Miranda is tonight. She knew full well I would hate a place like this, and there is no way in hell I'm getting topless here. I don't know what I will do, I'm bored. I walk around the block to see if there is another club I can go to. There is just a local dive bar. I sit down and order a Cosmo. The regulars look at me kind of funny. I am the only female there, and the only one under 40. Everyone else is drinking cheap draft beer or Whiskey and Cokes. I drink my Cosmo. No one really pays much attention to me after I settle in. The men glance at me every once in awhile but don't bother me. I play some Bob Seger on the Jukebox.


Wow, this place is nuts. The $20 cover for men has helped ensure close to a 50/50 ratio of males to females. It feels really weird to walk around a club with no shirt on, but hey, everyone else is in the same boat, so what the Hell. It's also quite fun, and erotic. Guys stare right at my tits as I walk up to the bar to get a drink. The bartenders are top-free too. I order a Long Island from a hot guy behind the bar. He has short dark hair and a great well toned chest. He is more polite than the male customers, he doesn't stare at my chest, he actually looks me in the eyes while taking my order. I pay for my drink and have a seat at the bar.


O.K., its midnight, and this is so lame. I had 2 Coronas because I felt too self conscious to get another Cosmo. This is still an unusual order at this dive, most people here are not getting imported beer. I play some Eminem on the jukebox, and get more stares. Evidently this is not the music they listen to here. A guy in his 50s with no teeth puts his arm around my shoulder and offers to buy me another drink, even though I just bought one 30 seconds ago. time to leave! I walk outside. There is no place whatsoever to go besides Off the Top where Miranda is. No, I'm not going to go there. What the Hell am I going to do, she said she is staying till they close at 4:00 A.M. Fuck.


It's 12:30 A.M., and Darlene is still not here. Shit, I thought for sure she would eventually come around and come back here. She really is shy. I planned this night to loosen her up, she needs to have a sexy experience like this. Oh well, she'll be O.K., she probably called a cab and is sitting at the hotel room wathching t.v.


12:30 A.M. I walk back into the front entrance. Am I really going to do this? That sounds so embarrassing to be topless in public like that. I can't believe many girls would really do that. I pace around the foyer a bit. The bouncer asks if I'm O.K. I tell him yes. "Can't decide if you have the nerve to follow the dress code, huh?" he laughs. I am obviously not the first girl to be hesitant at the front door. I blush.

I sit down on a sofa in the foyer. No, there is no way. I'm not letting guys ogle my breasts all night. This is too weird. Why did that bitch drag me here, she could have just gone herself and I would have done something near the hotel! I feel a nice buzz from the drinks I had earlier, and do really want another Corona. I'm not going back to that creepy dive bar. Hmm... should I do this? You only live once. Oh god, fuck me, what the hell, why not.

I wish they had a private place to undress. On the other hand, what difference will that make, I'm going to be topless anyway. Still I am finding this very difficult. I unbutton the white blouse slowly one button at a time. No one is in the room right now except the bouncer. O.K., here goes nothing. I start to remove the blouse. This is too much, I can't do this.


God this is fun. Every time I walk around my boobs jiggle. Guys are in awe at this place, they just get to stare and stare at hundreds of bare tits. I stare at them too, one of the benefits of being bi-sexual! There are all different types of women here; blondes, brunettes, and red-heads, of course!

Some girls have small breasts, some have medium sized ones, some have huge knockers. Lots of guy's chests too look at too, some are hairy, some have no chest hair, some have beer bellys, some have six-pack abs. Wow, this is like a buffet of topless skin. In the restroom they dispense baby oil from a machine. I wonder why, and then I see a cute girl with long dark hair pump some oil into her hands and slather it all over her chest and arms. She has a great tan, and the oil makes her body glisten. God, she looks so hot! I copy her, and slather the oil all over my tits and arms too. I go to the dance floor for the first time that night.


I start to button the blouse back up. Then I stop. I'm so indecisive! Fuck FUCK FUCK...I can't get up the nerve to do this for real. Without thinking, I take the blouse all the way off and give it to the shirt checker. She is topless, a short brunette with short hair. I start to go in the front door, and the bouncer says the bra has to come off too. I turn beet red. I turn around, and ask the checker for my shirt back. "Come on, hon, just go in, you'll have fun. Lots of girls back out, but I tell you, what's the big deal? Are you a local?"

I tell her no. I ask her why she asked that. "Because as long as you are not from around here, who's gonna know? Just do it, you'll have a good time, I promise."

I feel totally on the spot. O.K., breathe deep, Darlene. You can do this, its just skin, no big deal. It's easy for a total slut like Miranda, but I still find this nerve-wracking. O.K. 1-2-3. I whip of my bra without thinking about it and hand it to the checker. "Atta girl!" she praises me. My breasts are free now. I always feel awkward, they are way too big, I barely even wear bikinis ever. Now everyone in the world is going to stare at them Maybe guys here are polite and won't stare. I take another deep breath and walk into the main door. I almost faint, there are HUNDREDS of people here. More guys than girls it seems, but the ratio looks pretty even. Jesus, what am I doing? I walk up to the bar. I am so embarrassed. I sit down at a stool and cross my arms over my chest and order a Corona.


I am dancing with a guy to some hyper up-beat dance tune. Then all of a sudden the DJ puts on a slow tune, All out of Love by Air Supply. The guy I was dancing with puts his arms around me and starts to dance slowly. What the hell? I didn't expect this, this is like fucking high school prom with no shirts! Oh well, go with the flow. Actually it feels kind of nice. His chest presses against my boobs, and he puts his arms around my bare back. The oil on my naked chest makes our bodies rub together in a nice slippery way. I don't want to lead him on though, so after the song I excuse myself to go to the bar and get another Long Island. Well well well, what do we have here? Darlene is sitting at the bar with her arms crossed over her tits, and she is as red as a tomato!


Miranda sits down next to me with a big smirk on her face. "I can't believe you made me do this." I tell her. "Made you?" she says. "Well what else was I supposed to do?" I ask. "Take your arms off your chest and relax like everyone else. You can't drink your beer like that!"

She had a point. I had to move my arms to drink a beer. I take a sip, and everyone can see my left breast. A guy sits down on the other stool next to me. I finish my beer. Ah hell, this isn't so bad. I walk around with Miranda a bit. I was totally wrong about guys not staring, they look right at my chest. It takes me awhile to get used to this, but like the checker said, no one here knows me. I slowly get used to it. By 2:30 A.M., Miranda finally dragged me to the dance floor. My breasts jiggle while I dance. This is so strange. I still feel weird, but it is actually fun, I can't believe it. Then the DJ plays a slow tune. "These Dreams" by Heart. Miranda puts her arms around me and we dance close. I don't have a problem with girls dancing, and I'm not homo-phobic, but I know Miranda is Bi, and doing this topless feels kind of awkward with her. She can tell, and she says "Don't worry, I'm not trying to seduce you. We'll find you a guy with a big hard cock tonight!" We dance the night away, and have lots of drinks. Men stare at my chest all night, but I don't care anymore. I never hook-up that night, but I have a blast, and feel more uninhibited now. We go home and collapse at 4:30 in the morning. What a vacation!

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