- Reviews & Essays
- On Pornography ID Laws
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Imagine signing in to Literotica with a driver's license.
It's the reality British citizens face in an effort to protect children from pornography. Since I can't even synch my nudes with the cloud, I have no idea how Britain intends to safeguard the privacy of the millions of users on pornhub. But there are enough articles about why that won't work.
Bear with me while I attack the premise.
Who cares if teens look at porn?
According to a New Hampshire study, they already are. In a survey of incoming freshman, over 90 percent of boys and 60 percent of girls reporting seeing pornography before the age of 18. Most of these were intentional, between the ages of 14 and 17.
But I believe you already knew that.
Because most of you reading this article probably viewed pornography before the age of 18. And not because of the insidious Internet and its immorality. You didn't accidentally discover pornography; you went searching for it.
As uncomfortable as it is to admit (and it is awkward), teenagers are burgeoning sexual beings. While most people prefer to pretend this isn't true if we are going to consider sacrificing privacy to safeguard teens from porn, it is best to engage in the ideas behind this movement.
Anti-porn advocates tend to equate pornography with addiction, pointing to the patterns of a few to find fault with the entire industry. According to the narrative, extreme fetishes exist as an escalation of addictive porn habits. A man ultimately expands his interests to gang bangs, fisting, and facials, to the point of losing interest in human interaction. He contents himself with pornography, waisting endless hours manipulating himself and his monitor hand over fist until reaching a profound moment of self-reflection.
Then he tells us the cautionary tale.
Here the parallels between porn addiction and drug abuse begin to seem interchangeable. One activist group, Fight the New Drug (a Mormon based, anti-porn organization), directly equates the two. Treat the twin stories as a game of mad libs, replacing marijuana with playboy, and crystal meth with Japanese tentacle porn. Poor Billy starts smoking/stroking marijuana/playboy. And while he's fine at first, eventually Billy craves meth/Japanese tentacle porn as the only thing that satisfies him.
If only Billy hadn't picked up that first Playboy, he wouldn't be addicted to this fetish.
Only that's not how fetishes work.
The slippery slope fallacy, so often applied to sex, smacks similarly to the archaic sex-negative narratives. One where gays were mothered too much or molested. When sexually interested women were described as damaged with "daddy issues". But the idea of childhood trauma or neglect creating sexual fantasies is coming unglued around the data. A recent survey of the ABDL (Adult Baby Diaper Lovers) community showed fetishists with all manner of relationship with their parents - good and bad. Nobody knows why people latch onto "abnormal" sexual desires, if only because no one should be able to qualify what kinds of sex are normal.
And despite the pathology, being into the "weird stuff" isn't a bad thing. Though no sexual interest is superior to another, more and more science reports favorably on fetishists. According to Dr. Richard Krueger, a psychiatry professor at Columbia, surveys repeatedly show that practitioners of BDSM have a higher socioeconomic status. Not only that, couples engage in BDSM score higher on important elements of marital happiness, such as communication, have lower levels of mental health problems, and report higher levels of satisfaction with their sex life.
This contrasts directly with the convenient label of fetishes as disorders or products of sexual addiction. Fighting the New Drug heralds the idea of porn as a drug pusher, constantly inundating their customers with higher quality BDSM smack. While many new ideas are accessed through pornography, these reflect practices also performed in private.
How else would the pornographer know what to record?
Put simply, the demand for porn encourages the supply. No company creates an extreme video in the hopes of creating an audience; people already sexualize nearly everything. While some are more popular than others, it's not like pornhub created cock and ball torture in a lab. Although...
This idea of escalation plays directly into the theory that pornography is an act of violence against women. For advocates like the folks at Fighting the New Drug, witnessing hardcore, violent acts of sex towards women (but not violent acts toward men, like cock and ball torture), creates a population of men that see women as interchangeable objects. Desensitized and unable to control their urges, they normalize acts of sexual abuse and assault, putting women in danger to realize these ultimate fantasies.
Only this narrative ignores the deluge of data indicating the opposite.
From 1995 to 2010, when online pornography grew to its current prevalence, rape and sexual assault went down 64 percent. A study in Psychology Today showed that Czechoslovakia, Japan, China, and Denmark all experienced marked drops in rape statistics after relaxing statutes prohibiting the possession of lewd materials. These statistics seem to indicate that many men who might commit acts of sexual aggression find an outlet through pornography.
And to be clear: there is a profound difference between engaging in a consensual fantasy, even something as extreme as nonconsent and actually attacking someone.
There's one last argument for the opponents of porn: the social cost. The deteriorating relationships between men and women in marriage, having to constantly compare themselves to an unfair ideal. To be fair, studies have shown that men who look at porn without their partner's knowledge are more likely to report marital problems and dissatisfaction with their sex life.
Put another way, men who have to lie to their wives about wanting to look at other naked women have worse relationships.
Did that really need to be studied?
On the opposite end of the spectrum, a study by the University of Arkansas found that couples who shared sexually explicit material with each other held "significantly higher scores of relationship and sexual satisfaction" than those who did not. To bludgeon home that point, married couples who enjoy porn together have happier sex lives. Those who have to burn their search history in a vat of acid after rubbing one out, don't approach sex in a healthy way.
Duh...
So if pornography helps (not harms) a relationship, why are we so concerned about teenagers seeing it? According to the research, after viewing pornography, 20 percent of teens were less likely to want to have sex. They already have an interest in sex, why is porn not a safe outlet? And just like the decrease in sexual assault, there seems a strong correlation between pornography use and the decline in teen pregnancy.
I would prefer sixteen-year-olds masturbate to erotic material than engage in sexual activities they aren't yet ready for.
I do question the legitimacy of the law that allows teenagers to engage in sex, but not to see certain types of movies. It's almost the equivalent of allowing a teenager to own a gun, but forbidding them from seeing John Wick. Even so, I am not sure I would advocate changing the law; I really don't want teens in adult stores. The current system of pinkie-promising our age online seems to serve us best.
Look - I am not saying there are no problems with pornography. I've just yet to see any research to indicate that the problems with addiction, body issues, moderation, and education are unique to adult entertainment. If prohibitions need to be made, they belong inside the family unit, for reasons of personal choice.
These discussions don't belong to the government.
While there is a real problem with the three percent of children exposed to pornography before the age of 12, the problem is smaller than stated, and the solution is proper parenting. Here's a radical thought, maybe don't give preteens smartphones. But it doesn't help matters to turn seeing something sexual into an automatic catastrophe. Let's take a deep breath and remember that when people lived in log cabins and mud huts, people of all ages witnessed sex without turning into pillars of salt.
Exhume the stereotypes, from the banal (sexual desires are caused by porn) to the bullshit (porn increases sexual violence) and deal with the real problems. It's time for the older generation to shed our uncomfortable secrecy about sex. Like it or not, porn is here to stay. And the next generation is going to access adult content earlier than we'd like to imagine. Let's work on ways to stop children from seeing porn, like voluntary parental blocks. Let's have the conversation - no matter how uncomfortable - about consent and healthy sexual interactions.
When our teens are ready to explore their sexuality, they should without experiencing the same risks and shames we grew up accidentally embracing. And porn will be a part of that if balanced with perspective and moderation. And that's only possible through a conversation best reserved for parents, that acknowledges sex as neither inherently sinful nor nasty.
Either that - or prepare to pay pornhub for that platinum privacy option.
Below are my sources. If you have a thought or some information to share, I'd love to hear it below in the comments. I suppose you're also welcome to blow my argument up out of its proper context to call me names, that's kind of what the internet is for.
https://www.cdc.gov/teenpregnancy/about/index.htm
http://www.unh.edu/ccrc/pdf/CV169.pdf
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5370376/
https://bigthink.com/philip-perry/are-sexual-fetishes-psychologically-healthy
- COMMENTS
Anonymousalmost 4 years agoA well written piece that is fully sourced, a sad rarity on today's Internet!
I'd like to comment on several of the anonymous comments you received, addressing the issues in no particular order...
Addiction. Just about anything can be addicting if the individual has the personality traits to allow it. In fact most people have some type of addiction in their lives, even if they don't recognise it as such. Now I'm not talking about chemical addictions like heroin or even alcohol. Physiological dependencies are a different matter entirely. I'm talking about behavioural addictions. Everyone has heard of Gambling Addictions, hell, there are toll free phone numbers you can call for that! But people also develop addictions to sports, both playing and watching. (We all know football and other sport fans who go into withdrawal when seasons end!) And golfers who will play in almost anykind of weather or who will move to a locale where they can always play! Gaming is an addiction for many, be it World or Warcraft, Magic the Gathering, AD&D, cards or back gammon. Knitting, crocheting, drawing... Can all be addicting. What makes viewing porn any worse then ESPN subscriptions where you can watch multiple games at the same time!
Another commentator seems to think that porn will come between establishing relationships. Why would someone bother going down to the local pub to try and meet a man or a woman when you can get your jollies at home? Especially if you aren't blessed with a body that rates as a 10! I guess if you have to ask that question you really don't have much, or perhaps any, experience in regards to sex with another human! As the writer points out, most 'real' people are not 10's but rather 4, 5, 6 or so... And those people have to put themselves out and 'work' for the attention they want. They have to be nice, kind, witty, charming, or whatever it takes to attract the person that caught their eye. So what? That is not a bad thing, in fact it is the effort that makes the results all the more satisfying! It still feels good to touch another and be touched by another. Perhaps the man who is a 4 may have a harder time finding a partner then a woman will, but such has always been true, pre porn as well as today! The ladies have always found it easier to meet men then it is for men to meet ladies. Nature even encourages this by the natural birthrate of more males hen females. If the 4s and 5s (and lower) really had such a hard time meeting, fucking and ultimately reproducing, logically they would have been bred out of the population a long time ago! The fact that they are still to be found (according to the commentator) would seem to indicate a flaw in the premise.
Then there is the issue of escalation as being a problem. ALL sex is escalation! From that first innocent kiss it escalates to rubbing through the clothes. Then hands under the clothes and dry humping. Then feels and hand jobs. Then blow jobs and cunnilingus. 1st base, 2nd base, third base then Home! If it didn't escalate there wouldn't be many people around at all! So what if an individual's interest in porn escalates? Do you watch the same movie over and over? Perhaps you like science fiction movies, do you restrict your diet to Star Trek? Or do you try others?
Also, one commentator brought up the author's conclusions regarding over population. Try as I might, I can't find anything in the author's article that addresses overpopulation, maybe I missed it but it seems to be a total non issue.
Anyway, kudos to the author! Well written, well researched, right on the nose!
Anonymousover 4 years agoI disagree with your assertions about porn addiction. Nearly anything can be addictive for some people, but for most an image pales in comparison to a real interaction with a real partner. Even if the image is of someone who matches your ideal of physical perfection and is doing exactly what you would want them to do with you. Even though the real partner is likely far from perfect in appearance and isn't turned on by the exact same things you are. Even though you can control a masturbation session in ways you can't control sex with a partner. Even though finding a partner and maintaining a relationship requires work. Porn can be fun, but it is never fully satisfying and it always gets old.
I also disagree that declining birth rates are a problem. Perpetual population increase is unsustainable and needs to stop. That means accepting that the age group we now call "seniors" will make up 25-30% of the population, or more if life expectancies continue to increase. Supporting these people need not be a problem as technology continues to improve human productivity and as more people remain healthy and able to work later in life.
People have always been dissatisfied with their bodies. People knew there were others out there with bigger dicks or bigger boobs and were jealous of them long before there was today's level of access porn. More plastic surgery is just a result of reduced risks, improved results and more people having the means to pay for it.
Anonymousalmost 5 years agoAs a resident of the UK, and one who discovered the magazine Mayfair at the age of twelve, nearly thirteen, I wonder why you think we would implement having to sign on with a drivers licence ID. That only limits access to on-line pornography. Something that did not exists when I was at that tender age. You are right that parental guidance is key.
When I was thirteen, and shortly after I had discovered the magazines, I was naked and masturbating over the images of women I found quite attractive. I knew they were totally out of the realms of possibility to meet them, but they were attractively curvaceous and were showing more of their bodies than you would normally see.
One day, while I was doing this my mother caught me just as I was about to ejaculate. Something I was unable to stop at the time. Rather ruined a good magazine with that.
In my family, seeing each other naked was never a problem. The only thing my mother said was "Don't hurt yourself." We talked quite a bit after that.
Shortly after that incident I had managed to persuade a female friend I liked to get naked with me. Two thirteen year old people comfortable enough with each other to allow the other to explore with hands only. We gave each other a really happy ending without going to full intercourse. It was, I thought, part of our ongoing sexual education. Knowing the smell, feel and responses of the other.
My mother, somehow always knew what happened. She just warned my about letting concupiscence rule our heads. Yeah, I had to go look that up too. The thing is, my mother, nor my father when he was not in hospital, hid themselves from us seeing them naked. I had great parental guidance throughout my sexual awakening and my mother found the right books from the library to help me increase my knowledge. The female friend and myself had very different career paths when we left school, so we never ended up together. I think she got quite a sexual education as well.
So, the role of proper parenting in all this is important. Probably more important than raging against the pornography machine.
I am well into my sixties now, and have a wonderful son. I have always been open to discuss anything he wanted to, and hope that he found the material useful.
Share the Love
Devir Ginator.
nthusiasticalmost 5 years agoWhy is it no one is trying to limit exposure to violence (tv, movies, games, abuse), while depictions of physical love and caring trigger hysterical outcries that ''Something Must Be Done!'' It's so sad. The real obscenity is the violence, hatred, and abusive treatment of those without power by the powerful in our world.
Anonymousalmost 5 years agoWhile a lot of what you've written here is true, I feel like the way you've presented it is a distortion of reality. First and foremost it's a fact that most humans have finished growing by the time they are 16 yrs old. They are sexual beings fully capable of impregnation and carrying children to term. I can't and won't dispute that.
Your second point about addiction, however, is where the wheels start to come off. The fact of the matter is that most of us are 5-6's on a scale of attractiveness of 1-10. We're average. Average penis lengths, average breast sizes, average physiques - average. The top 1% of 'adult' performers, however, are ANYTHING but. If Riley Reid or Manuel Ferrara went out for a night on the town and decided they were going to get laid, then they would not go home alone. Period.
An average dude or dudette on the other hand is going to have to work for it, they're going to have to EARN it. They'll have to put themselves out there, be witty, funny and charming, spend their money, and they're going to have to face rejection - a lot of it. And guess what? They're not going to be taking home Manuel Ferrara or Riley Reid, they're going to be taking home Joe sixpack who has a weak chin, or plain Jane who would be hot if not for a nose that is too big for her face.
So here are their choices: 1. sit in their computer chair in the safety of their own home and jerk//jill to someone significantly more attractive than anyone they'd ever be able to pull, OR invest time, money and emotional currency in the hopes of finding someone 'in their league.' It becomes a case of why buy the cow when I can watch Riley Reid milk Manuel Ferrara for free?
Second of all there is a very real correlation between 'porn addiction' and the number of 'performers' out there. It once again comes down to accessibility. If Joe sixpack gets dressed up and heads to his local dance club or country bar, then odds are he's going to dance with a few women, but ultimately he'll go home alone. Same guy can, however, go onto the internet and browse dozens of beautiful naked women without fear of rejection, fantasize about any or all of them doing anything and everything he wants, not have to worry about pleasing them, then cum whenever he feels like it.
Joe gets tired of being burned, so he opts for option 2. That means every single time he jerks off it's always w/ a dozen or more beautiful women doing w/e he wants instead of having sex with one 'average' woman who is going to want him to make an effort to please her too. The fact that he's 'tapping' a dozen beautiful women anytime he feels like it is going to be extremely pleasing to his primitive monkey brain. No fuss, no muss, just beautiful women all of the time. That is EXTREMELY addicting.
As for escalation, I'm going to have to disagree with you here too. The fact of the matter is that if you go searching for 'busty women', then odds are you're going to end up on a tube site like pornhub. The odds are pretty good that the 'busty women' you find will be doing 'other stuff.' First it starts off w/ them posing, then masturbating, then taking a dick, anal, DP etc.. It is actually kind of a slippery slope.
It's also kind of ironic that my first exposure to porn was in fact playboy. 13 yr old me spent hours jerking it to Cindy Crawford. These days, however, (I'm 32) when I go searching for porn it's usually for deepthroating, anal, and cock sucking after the cumshot. I'm not big on violence or degradation, but I def like seeing women in submissive roles worshiping the cock. I also like reading about women who take what they want (it's always awful in visual porn).
Porn as an outlet to prevent rape: Yeah, I agree. It goes back to what I was saying about availability vs risk/cost. Rape a hotty and go to jail for a few years and ruin the rest of both of your lives, or fantasize about the hotty on screen while you jerk off. Kind of a no-brainer. I'm sure the opposite is true though in that there are cases of escalation. Fantasizing about rape becomes dull, so the perverts take it to the real world. This is a no-win situation.
As for the correlation between porn verses teen pregnancy, I'd also argue that there's a direct correlation between porn and declining birth rates. It's actually a serious social problem because there are fewer younger working adults to support the aging population. Japan is prob the worst instance of this, but it's happening everywhere. (I know there are other factors like contraceptives, college and careers that get in the way of child rearing, but I'm certain porn has played a part, too.)
To wrap this up: Is porn good for society? In my opinion it isn't. Yes there is a decline in violent sexual acts, but there is also a higher expectation being placed on both men and women. Perfectly average dudes worry about the size of their penises, and perfectly average women worry about the size of their breasts. There has been a marked increase in plastic surgery, and people aren't as satisfied with reality.
That lack of satisfaction boils down to the fact that while I live in the western united states, I can view the top 1% of beautiful women in the Czech republic. Women I will never meet in real life for any reason. So basically while there are 7 billion people on this planet, I can look at thousands of them from all over the globe and think to myself, 'Screw the perfectly great gal who lives across from me in 2b, I want to marry the hotty half-way around the world.'
