tagSci-Fi & FantasyUrban Oddballs: 14

Urban Oddballs: 14


Onions Cry Too

Edited by Thegreat_pretender

The day was gloomy, sending rain falling with no avail upon the little pink house at 4270 N Widows. Inside, Shawky, Annry, and Gaxi were discussing something very important.

"Yeah, so if I had a cool code name, it would be 'Back Drop' Yeahoo!" Gaxi cheered, jumping around in her panties and a t-shirt.

"That's dumb, it should be 'Bottom Heavy', heehee," Annry snickered.

"Oh, now hush, Annry girl, that's mean. Wait, don't you have one already? I mean, you have been an Outter before?" Shawky asked, sipping tea as she relaxed on her fluffy couch.

"Well, umm, no, 'cuz codenames are dumb..." Annry retorted before being interrupted.

"Wait, you're a mouse and you use arrows, like one on the computer, right? So, what about 'Mouser'?" Gaxi giggled, amused by her suggestion.

"That's terrible and you should feel terrible, 'Bottom Heavy'!" Annry snapped, giggling at Gaxi.

"Stop being a meanie!" Gaxi huffed.

"Bizzy, a refill please," Shawky summoned.

"Yeah, right away, Mistress. Would you two like more cookies?" Bizzy asked.

"Yes, thank you!" The two women replied as they continued to discuss.

"Well, if Quiz were to have one, what would she be called?" Shawky asked.

"Hmm, 'Reptile Girl' maybe?" Annry shrugged.

"Oh, oh, what about 'Scaleling'?" Gaxi clapped.

"Well someone's creative," Annry giggled.

"Yeah, yeah, and for Poppy what about 'Sound Hound'?" Gaxi giggled.

"That's super on the nose, don't you think?" Annry pointed out.

"She might like it," Shawky mused as she nodded to Bizzy, who handed her a cup of tea.

"So what about you, what would your name be?" Annry asked Shawky, her voice muffled by lemon cookies.

"Hmm, maybe something like 'Still Birth' perhaps," Shawky said with a scary grin.

"Booo that one's depressing, how about 'Womb Witch'! Gaxi suggested.

"A little old-timey, but I could like it!" Shawky giggled.

"Well, I like it better than the first one too. Wouldn't want to have a name that dark, it'll scare people away," Annry pointed out.

"Oh so you know about names? I thought you said they were stupid?" Shawky giggled.

"Oh, shut up, preggo!" Annry scowled has she stuffed three cookies in her mouth.

"Don't be mean to Mommy!" Gaxi pouted.

"Wait, what?" Annry exclaimed, wide eyed.

"Um, uh, whew that just slipped out, didn't, well I'm embarrassed now..." Gaxi mumbled.

"Oh, its fine, it was actually pretty cute..." Shawky was interrupted by the frantic rings of the doorbell.

"I'll get it, Mistress," Bizzy giggled.

"Oh, Shawky!" Said a redheaded woman of considerable height, drenched from the rain. She cried into Bizzy's bosom, overcome with grief.

"Mistress, a distraught, tall woman seems to be looking for you!" Bizzy yelled back over the rain.

"Quick, Bizzy, bring her in, you're getting the foyer soaked with all that rain!" Shawky yelled back.

Before the group was a sniffling redhead who towered over them, her huge pale thighs going for miles and her huge breasts dominating the rest of her form. Upon pulling the fiery curtain of dripping hair away from her, it became clear who this mystery woman was.

"Oh my god, Oeno! You-you dyed your hair?" Gaxi asked.

"Oh no! Bizzy, fetch Oeno girl some towels and a blanket!"


Moments later, Oeno was dry and wrapped in a blanket, now huddled next to Shawky on the couch.

"O-okay, so um, I don't think I can be your healer anymore, Gaxi," Oeno said with sorrow in her voice.

"Wha! No wait, tell us what happened," Gaxi asked, worried about her friend.

"I-I don't have Salope's favor anymore, I quit the church," Oeno mumbled.

"What happened, Oeno girl?" Shawky asked, holding her close.

"T-they had me do..." Oeno mumbled before breaking into a crying fit.

"Out with it, cyclops!" Annry yelled.

"Annry girl, please...now, go on Oeno girl" Shawky said, rubbing Oeno's damp head.

"They wanted me to ascend, but the things I saw...oh gods the things..." Oeno cried.

"Ass end?" Gaxi repeated, rubbing her head.

"Oh god damn it, Gaxi, you know what she said!" Annry scowled, rubbing her temples.

"Yeah, but, no, but, yeah, but, what does that even mean, though?" Gaxi stuttered.

"T-they, they had me bathe in a pool. Though once I was in, everything was played back to me, everything..."


"Oeno, time for school, baby!" Said a busty blonde woman as she awoke her daughter for school.

"Can I have six pancakes for breakfast, Mommy?" Oeno asked as her chubby, adolescent body rolled out of bed.

"I don't know, baby, don't you think that's a little too much for you?" Cautioned Oeno's mother.

"Please, Mommy?" Oeno begged.

"Well, alright, I guess it won't hurt," said Oeno's mother.

"Wow, these pancakes are great, mom!" Oeno giggled, rubbing her cheek.

"Morning, Cupcake, how are you?" Snorted a large Minotaur man.

"Oh, morning Pa, I'm good!" Oeno mumbled through the layers of syrup-smothered cake in her mouth.

"Morning, honey!" Said Oeno's mother, kissing her husband.

"So, first day of school today, eh?" Said Oeno's father.

"Oh yeah, Pa, I'm super excited to go back!" Oeno giggled.

"That's good, Cupcake. Well finish up and I'll take you." Oeno smiled as her father grabbed a cup of coffee prepared by his loving wife.

"Oh, Bullget, don't forget her lunch and yours," said Oeno's mother.

"Yeah, I know Omio, but does she really need a lunch on her first day? She's only gonna be there till noon," Bulllget asked, sipping his coffee while checking his watch.

"Well, our little muffin might get a little hungry and I'm sure they'll allow them to have lunch time before they go. I read in that children's magazine that the lunch room is an important breeding ground for friendship," Omio pointed out.

"Well, if you say so, dear. Back when I was a lad we just beat each other with sticks," Bullget snorted.

"Were they big sticks, daddy?" Oeno asked.

"Oh, only the biggest of sticks, Cupcake...only the biggest," Bellget smiled, a tear of pride running down his cheek.


"Your dad is cool, though!" Gaxi clapped.

"Yeah, he is cool," Oeno nodded, still shaken up.

"Yeah, that's right, you mentioned that he was a Minotaur way back when," Shawky pointed out.

"Okay, okay, let her continue," Annry said with a hint of concern in her voice.


Later, in front of the school.

"Okay, see ya dad!" Oeno smiled, hugging her father.

"See ya, sweet! Ma will be back at noon to pick you up!" Bullget snorted.

"Okay! I'll make sure to hit new friends with big sticks of kindness or whatever," Oeno giggled.

"That'a girl, see you later!" Bullget smiled, kissing his daughter on the cheek before walking back to his car.

"Woah, did you see the bulge on that bull?" Whispered a female teacher to a co-worker.

"I know, right? Super tasty!" Giggled the fellow teacher.


"Eww, fucking horny ass teachers!" Annry scoffed.

"Come on, Annry girl, don't interrupt. You're right, though, they are a tad distasteful," Shawky nodded.


At the start of class.

"Alright. kids, I'm Ms. Finger, welcome to the start of a new school year," said the rotund woman as she wrote her name on the blackboard behind her.

"It seems like we're in the height of you all's adolescence now, just one more year and you will all be in high school. Meanwhile, I just get older, and older, and more unmarried, and fat..." Ms. Finger trailed off, contemplating her own mortality.

"Um, teach?" A child said, motioning for the introduction to commence.

"Ugh, right, let's go through you all. Stand up and state your name, along with what you did during the summer or whatever," mumbled Ms. Finger.

As they went around the room, each student stated their name along with what they did that summer. After the first two rows gave out their names and summer activities, it was Oeno's turn. On cue and with great excitement, Oeno rose from her seat.

"My name is Oeno and my family and I went to the food festival in Spades city during this summer!" Oeno announced with great pride.

"So, what did you eat, the whole festival?" Asked a female classmate.

The whole class erupted in cackling whimsy, much to Oeno confusion, which turned into embarrassment as the teacher joined in. Various teasing remarks were made at Oeno's appearance. Oeno sat down in utter defeat once Ms. Finger joined the class's uproar.

"Whew, thank you for, hehe, sharing, Miss Oeno. Next please."

"Yeah, hi, my name is Bolboa, and I didn't do too much this summer but I think it's really shitty that you all laughed at Oeno."

"Alright, take your seat," waved Ms. Finger.

"You're the worst, you're a fucking adult and you laughed at her, shame on you!" Bolboa barked.

"Alright, go to the principal's office!" Yelled Ms. Finger.

"Go to hell, you fat ass bitch!" Bolboa yelled slamming the door.

"Well, I hope your happy, Oeno, look at the mess you've caused," Ms. Finger scoffed.

"Sorry..." Oeno trailed off, slumping down in her seat.


"That fucking bitch!" Annry yelled

"Yeah, she was a big meanie...that Bolboa girl was nice though!" Gaxi commented.

"Oeno, does the Finger bitch get thrown off a cliff or something?" Annry barked.

"Oh, uh, no, hehe, but thank you," Oeno laughed, rubbing a tear out of her eye.

"Please continue, Oeno girl," Shawky said as she took a sip of tea.

"Oh right, erm, okay," Oeno nodded, wiping her eye with a tissue.


Later, when the classes were let out for lunch, Oeno made her way to the cafeteria after retrieving her lunch from her locker.

'Class was rough, but maybe what mommy said was right and things will get better at lunch.' Oeno thought as she walked down the hall, pink lunch pail in hand.

"Hey, fat ass, is that your lunch?" Barked a young girl.

"Y-yes, my mommy made it for me..." Oeno said, tucking in her lips.

"Don't you think you've had enough to eat?" Laughed the girl as her friend snatched Oeno's pail away from her.

"Please, give me my lunch back!" Oeno cried as the girls passed the pail between themselves.

"Why, so you can feed you fat face even more?" Laughed one of the girls.

"Wait, here, I'll give you your lunch back," snickered one of the girls

"T-thank you...wha!" Oeno cried as the pail slipped from the girl's hand, falling to the linoleum floor below. It cracked and popped open on impact, causing all of its contents to spill out.

"Oops, butterfingers!" Laughed the girls as they passed by Oeno.

Oeno, with her last hope of meeting anyone nice discarded on the ground like garbage, broke out into a heavy sob. Streams of sadness poured from her eye as she tried to recover her lost lunch, thankful that it was all sealed tight in lunch bags and a canteen. Upon recovering the items she looked to a note from her mother that was stuck to the plastic bag of her sandwich.

'Have a good day, baby. You'll find that someone, don't worry.'

'Oh mom, that's not true, though. No one likes me, not even the teacher.' Sobbed Oeno as she packaged the items back into her damaged pail.

"Hey, are you okay?" Said a familiar voice.

"Oh, uh, I'm sorry," Oeno pouted, rubbing her eye.

"No, why are you apologizing? Here, let me help you up," said the pink skinned girl.

"Wait, your name was Boo, Bo, Bobby, right?" Oeno sniffled, wiping her teary eye.

"Yep, close enough, and you're Onion, right?" Bolboa giggled.

"No, it's Oeno!" Oeno cried, though the nickname made her feel better.


"Oh, Onion is a cute name, though. Can we call you that from now on?" Gaxi giggled.

"Oh, hush now, Gaxi girl. Please continue with your story, Oeno," Shawky spoke.

"Well, I kind of like the name Onion, though, so don't let me stop you," Oeno giggled, amused by Gaxi's comment.

"I guess she started to call you that because she found you crying and your name is spelt like onion?" Annry pondered.

"I-I t-think so. Bobby was always so funny, I really do miss her," Oeno thought aloud, her mind shifting to sorrowful feelings once more.


"Okay, Cupcake, are you sure you want to do this? I mean, it's not too late to turn back," Omio said to her daughter in the back seat.

"No, ma, I can do it. I'm doing it for me, and I'll be strong, okay?" Oeno assured her mother, nodding but holding back the urge to cry.

"Well, let me walk you to the gate then sweetheart, okay?" Omio offered.

"Yes, please," Oeno shuddered.

The two walked up to the cheesy gates of camp 'Chipper Chipmunks'. Atop the gate was a fat cartoon chipmunk giving the onlookers a thumbs up.

"Well, the slogan is cute," Omio giggled.

It read 'Where Fat turns into FUN'. These words gave Oeno some ease that her stay here for the next 4 months wouldn't be as scary as she once perceived.

"Honey, I'm proud of you for taking this intense interest in your health," Omio smiled.

"Thank you, mom, I'll be at my target weight by my birthday," Oeno smiled back her

"I know you will, honey, I believe in you. Now, okay honey, should I walk you in or do you have things covered from here?" Omio asked as she hugged her daughter.

"No, ma, I'll enter the threshold on my own," Oeno nodded.

"Okay baby, again, I'm so proud of you. See you in 4 months. Send me texts when you get a chance, okay?" Omio said as she waved her child goodbye.

"I sure will!" Oeno waved back, her chubby little arm flapping in the air as she did so.

With her mother gone Oeno followed other pudgy teen girls into the camp, a lot them waddling at varying speeds as they passed through the gates.

"All new Chippers report to the mess hall for orientation!" Blared a female voice on the loud speaker.

"Oh man, this sucks, am I right, blinky?" Said a chubby tigress waddling alongside Oeno

"Well, I want to be here, what about you?" Oeno asked with an innocence in her voice.

"Nah, my ma and pa got spooked by my chunkiness and sent me here, which sucks. Why the hell would you want to be here?" Asked the tigress, patting her exposed stomach.

"Well, I want get heathy for my 18th birthday, and I want to be a nurse. You can't be unhealthy and be a nurse, right?" Oeno pondered as she walked.

"Well, I guess, though you do have some hypocrites that are fat fucks, too, but I commend you for that dedication," The tigress nodded licking her hand.

"Wow, this is a bit of a walk, isn't it?" Oeno panted, wiping her brow.

"I know right, but we're almost there, just a few more steps," The tigress mentioned, wiping her own brow.

"By the way, I didn't get your name, miss kitty lady," Oeno huffed.

"It's Bloom, what about you, blinky?" Bloom huffed back.

"Oh, I'm Oeno, pleasure to meet you!" Oeno said with cheerful exhaustion.

"Yeah, well it'll be a real pleasure to get into the A/C!" Bloom gasped.


"Ech, a cat," Annry scoffed

"So, you wet to fat camp, Oeno girl? Well, it didn't sound like you were that broken up about going. What was the trouble there? Shawky asked, befuddled as to why this was a painful memory.

"Well, things get complicated," Oeno sniffled.

"What's wrong with cats, Annry?" Asked Gaxi.

"I used to roll with a cat girl back in the day and she was a bitch," Annry snorted.

"Huh..." Shawky murmured under her breath.

"Did you have to go to fat camp, Annry?" Gaxi asked.

"Was that a fucking joke?" Annry snarled.

"Eh, please continue, Oeno girl."

"Oh, okay so..." Oeno began again.


"Welcome campers to Chipper Chipmunks! I see a lot of new faces this year, and a lot of returning Chipmunks as well!" Giggled a fit chipmunk woman on stage as she addressed the crowd.

"Well, I hope you all are excited to get fit this summer! We have a number of fun activities here at camp for everyone to enjoy. Oh, and I got so excited that I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Holly, I'm one of your friendly counselors and I look forward to helping all of you on your journey today."

"Wow, she's hot!" Whispered a fat young boy to another.

"Please, she's not as hot as Merry!" Snorted the other boy

"Dude, Merry is a videogame character!" Scoffed the boy, slapping his friend on the head.

"Now, please help me introduce our other four cool as heck consolers!" Holly clapped as four individuals strutted out on stage with eager enthusiasm.

"Oh, wait, who's that fat guy?" A boy wearing a trilby asked Bloom.

"I don't know, nerd," Bloom snapped.

"Please guys, introduce yourselves!" Holly clapped as she was joined in by the crowd of fat teens.

"Hi kids, I'm Jerry, I handle all of the aquatic sports here at camp!" Laughed the jovial beaver man.

"Hey, I'm Terra, I'll be your nutritionist and I'll be keeping an eye on your midnight snacking, so watch out!" Snapped the giraffe woman, winking with ominous intent towards the audience.

"Yo, what's up kiddies, I'm Logan. I handle all of the regular sporting activities, so I hope you're ready for some football!" Snickered a high-energy spear ogre man.

"Lastly, it's me, Katharine. I'm like your nature guide, and I hope you guys are ready for some groovy hikes!"

"Thank you everyone! Well, guys, I hope you enjoy your summer with us! Now, I'll assign you all your cabin numbers," Holly clapped.


"What is Katharine?" Gaxi asked

"Oh, she was a skunk," Oeno mumbled.

"You interrupted for that?" Annry scoffed, eating another lemon cookie.

"I wanted to know, it was important!" Gaxi whined.

"Whatever. Continue, Oeno," Annry mumbled, rolling her wrist.


"Wow, so this is where I'm going to be staying, huh?" Oeno said as she looked at the piece of paper with a fat cartoon bee on it. She looked up at the cabin before her that bared the same symbol.

"Oh, Blinky, nice to see you again. Guess we're roomies this summer then, huh?" Bloom laughed.

"Well it seems that way. So, we got, like, two other girls staying with us, right?" Oeno asked.

"Yeah, yeah." Bloom confirmed.

In the distance, two girls approached the cabin.

"So then I said 'no you're fat, dad' and then I punched em!" Yelled a flop goblin girl, pumping her arms up and down.

"Well that's unfortunate. I mean, parents are to blame, really, that's why we're all here in the first place, right?" Questioned the high-class Belfve girl walking beside her.

"Oh look, there are our cabin mates!" Mentioned the flop goblin, pointing to Oeno and Bloom up ahead.

"Hi girls, pleasure to meet you two!" Oeno giggled

"Pleasure to meet you as well. So, um, what's with the eye?" The young Belfve pointed out.

"Oh, I got it from my mom, it's a genetic thing," Oeno exclaimed, pointing to her own eye.


"Oh, so that explains something, I guess. Though you're a CDG, right?" Annry asked.

"Yeah, yeah, I am," Oeno said through small sobs.

"Well, she did mention that upon meeting us, Annry girl, weren't you paying attention?" Shawky giggled.

"Oh, whatever, don't give me any of that sass," scoffed Annry as she sipped some of her tea.

"So, did you all have fun at camp, Oeno? I mean, it does sound like you guys were getting along well at the start," Gaxi mentioned while flagging Bizzy down for more cookies.

"Well yeah, I did..." Oeno trailed off.


Now girls, when hiking, take care to avoid the shed up near the clearing. It's rickety and I don't want any of you all getting hurt!" Katharine warned though her hazy eyes, an effect caused by her herbal smoking habits that made this seem a tad unconvincing.

"Yes, Kathy!" The troop of teens answered back as they followed their leader.

"Hey, Blinky, tonight let's check that place out, it could be fun!" Whispered Bloom to Oeno.

"That sounds really scary though, and I don't wanna get kicked out!" Oeno whispered back.

"Oh, don't be such a baby. Besides, Riho will be backing us up, right?" Bloom giggled, elbowing their flop goblin cabin mate in the belly.

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